Who would have thought Sam Elliott was such a bad bitch.... Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Turns out it was incline bench for ole Timmy Boy again today. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Gotta be careful not to throw up my charity all over the place. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Dodge projectile no-jutsu Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Seriously I think most of the people I email wouldn't pass a Turing test. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

I suffered from wind immediately after ending the recording. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

The simple pleasures of not Googling every question that enters into my head cannot be overhyped. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

295 and ready to thrive baby Podcast art by Joey Rizk

I'm basically the Musinex mob guy Podcast art by Joey Rizk

I also puked my guts out the next day, but that stays between you and me. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Maybe I'll go full goblin mode and become a barefoot runner. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

From Choji Summer to Rock Lee Winter baby Podcast art by Joey Rizk

It's a good thing I'm nimble Podcast art by Joey Rizk

My uncle asked how big my audience is and I let him know it's a bit of a cult... A cult following Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Does trimming my hair count as a weight cut? Podcast art by Joey Rizk

If you see me wearing trash bags when I'm out for a run mind your business. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

So wait when rappers talk about "ops" are they talking about Big Bobby Oppenheimer? Podcast art by Joey Rizk

About to go complete the Barbenheimer cycle... Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Doing the episode in a fainting couch makes me feel like an aristocrat hallucinating he's talking to his therapist as part of a morphine bender. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Baby boy's immune system is shot. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Ease off Johnny Law, nothing to see here. Outro Song: Nothing! Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Itachi's still cool though Outro Song: Fun Festival - Stardew Valley OST Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Fr tho bugs are icky Outro Song: The Jeffersons Theme Song Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Literally might be dehydrated from the goddamn heat. Outro Song: Harmonia - Rythem Podcast art by Joey Rizk

I'm going to become the Hokage, or at least Assistant District Hokage. Outro Song: Wind - Akeboshi Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Once my legs heal I'm going to be dunking on guys twice my height. Outro Song: Tow Truck Driver - Marty Ray Project Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Congratulations Mackenzie and Kyle! Outro Song: Lovely Day - Bill Withers Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Gonna gain 30 pounds from pilk and cookies. Outro Song: The Wicker Man - Iron Maiden Podcast art by Joey Rizk

You only look like an idiot if you get a sunburn on your face. Outro Song: Blister in the Sun - Violent Femmes Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Also I haven't been sunburned yet, which has to count for something Outro Song: Florida - Modest Mouse Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Straight up I am pooped and bushwhacked. Outro Song: Tired of Waking Up Tired - The Diodes Podcast art by Joey Rizk

I'm about to look vagrant pilled Outro Song: Hostage - Chelsea Grin Podcast art by Joey Rizk

There's an argument to be made I shouldn't be allowed to leave the house. Outro Song: Sweet Baby Ray's Remix - Gravity Sound Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Maybe I'll finally get a bike. Outro Song: Old Car - Whatever We Are Podcast art by Joey Rizk

If I lost power I would have just posted the transcript of this episode in the newspaper. Outro Song: POWER - B.A.P. Podcast art by Joey Rizk

I'm about to start making Arthur Morgan thirst trap Tik Toks. Outro song: Big Iron - Marty Robbins Podcast art by Joey Rizk

The podcast gods heard my cries and made it so easy to upload this episode. Now pay me $100,000,000 pls+ty Outro song: Capybara - Sto-Lichnyj Ona-Nas Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Almost lost my mind trying to upload this episode, seconds away from cancelling the whole goddamn podcast Outro song: Cat Scratch Fever - Ted Nugent Podcast art by Joey Rizk

My cat went on to try to eat more poison.... Dumb like his daddy Outro Song: Take Me Out To The Ball Game - Frank Sinatra & Gene Kelly Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Here it is Justin sorry for the delay Outro Song: Samurai Jack Theme - Will.i.am (I'm as surprised as you) Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Just in case anyone is confused my apology couldn't have been more sarcastic lol Outro Song: Future Days - Pearl Jam Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Oh yeah Happy Valentines Day also. Probably don't listen to this the day it comes out, it's probably not the best thing to get you into the mood.... Unless it is, in which case, well, maybe make note for your therapist. Outro Song: St. Valentine - Naomi John Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Lol omg just got an ad for the last of us show so spooky they heard me lol Outro Song: I Will Survive - Gloria Gaynor Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Got some "hot" takes up front if you know what I'm saying hahahahaha Outro song: 99 Red Balloons - Goldfinger Podcast art by Joey Rixk

My horoscope says I'm going to get so ripped they're going to start calling me paper. Outro song: Your Horoscope For Today -"Weird Al" Yankovic Podcast art by Joey Rizk

Seriously Ninja hmu Outro Song: Help The Aged - Pulp Podcast art by Joey Rizk

I think if I could do a muscle up at my current weight I'd be a contender for strongest man alive. Outro Song: Too Fat To Fly - Roger Alan Wade Podcast art by Joey Rizk

New year same me my brothers and sisters. Outro Song: Happy - Pharrell Podcast art by Joey Rizk