Is the aim to not go into your mind as a separate entity and view the world outwards without running it through the I filter if that makes sense?

Can personality be altered of who we are at our core? Can I change my comfort in routine and and discomfort in change? Will that ever fall away or is that my personality?

A brief summary of this episode

A brief summary of this episode

A brief summary of this episode

A brief summary of this episode

 I love listening to you, and look forward to next weeks, final webinar. I find myself feeling like I’ve been told suddenly that the sky is not blue, having been a student of the three principles and the idea that it’s all a thought that brings us pain. I have been sad most of my life and have done everything to feel it and exorcise this unhappiness. And yet it persists. Years of therapy, Hypnosis, breath, work, mushroom work, 3P’s on and on. I don’t understand how much more I can feel this pain to be rid of it. I know where it’s from and have had deep feelings about it.What am I missing? I’m confused.

A brief summary of this episode

I have just listened to Elana's conversation around her fear of driving and its 1 mile boundary.  This has been so helpful to me as right at the moment I am sitting in intense fear around the fact that my husband has had to travel interstate for an overnight business trip today.  This is a situation that I have had a lot of fear around for awhile now.  Over the last couple of years he has managed to only travel interstate on day trips, so home in the evenings. The day trips are now something that I don't see a lot of fear or thought around anymore.  So from what I heard in the conversation and then saw for myself is that exploration of the fear is the key here.  Having the fear - with all its intensity - around whatever boundaries we have created and exploring it with curiosity.  I see there is an overnight stay, some alone time for me and whatever else arises.  Am I on the right track with exploring this fear.

A brief summary of this episode

Such a delight seeing you again. For me, the webinar was super clear. I loved your fun and enthusiasm. Sometimes, I notice that noticing sensations is just happening. At those times, it feels like coming home. Other times, I notice a mind that desperately wants to feel sensations because of the assumption that if it does that, some magic enlightenment will happen. Of course, at those times i don’t experience the feeling of coming home at all. The logical question seems to be: “what can I do about this”? But I don’t think that question is helpful. Because it is coming from the separate self. So.. no question. Just a quick reply. Keep up the good work! 

Still wrestling with the idea of non-duality.In order to see what is true and real the concept of you i.e. the narrative needs to be silenced bracketed or ignored ?I feel there is a light bulb moment coming but not quite there yet.

Your habit is not you with Amy Johnson: the Sunday conversation (from the archive)

I see that choice is happening and, similarly, values are being created - innocently.If I discover that someone has a different value (which upsets me and has me saying "I would never do that" as you mentioned in the podcast), must I necessarily be doing the same thing to someone in my life (I think this is what I heard)?  I can, of course, see that I can be unreasonable, selfish, unfeeling - but not in the exact same circumstances, so the hurt does not fall away to just know this!I can find a certain amount of peace in knowing that I cannot know or explain the conditioning that resulted in their action / response, and neither can they.  They are innocent - no separate self. But there remains the expectation of the same value being expressed again in future and so, as I see it, the relationship must shift.  Or is there something I can pursue here, something I've missed, so the hurt / blame could fall away instead?

Duality is a confusion of the mind created by a set of beliefs which run the programming and inhibit what is true and real . Woke up with this thought . Am I on the right track ? 

As I move forward in the world of dating. More and more insecurities pop up about my appearance. Sometimes I feel ok, other times I become hyperfocused on parts of my face that I want to change. Ok, it this is a constant narrative that gets louder or goes quiet for a while. I definitely feel like there is dysmorphia not so much with the body. This has been around from about the age of 12. I know it has nothing to do with me. I have sat with the feelings, know the theory, know I can not secure my identity by feeling attractive, however when something big in my life comes up it is very loud!

'There is absolutely nothing in the past that you can change. That's basic physics.' Bad Advice Wednesday

So on your last podcast about being of service. You said it’s better to ask what is true. I’m confused exactly what that means. How do you go about finding out what is true. Are there any examples?

Yes, today really clarified that EVERYTHING IN EVERY MOMENT is a reflection of the past conditioning. I hadn't realised the full extent of that before. Now what if that conditioning is so profoundly embedded into what materialises, there is no distinct feeling in the experiences to feel into? No "pain" of separation even if separation is believed. Is just the observation and understanding of the truth enough for things to fall away 

For  incredible free materials and  information about the excellent courses that Dominic is offering: https://www.dominicscaffidi.com 

Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari : the Saturday book 

Back to that old feeling of not being able to move on.Why is it that moving on seems impossible to some and easy for othersIs it because the memories make the feeling seem real still and yet my life is moving faster now that age is creeping in?It’s like an extremely windy day and if the grip of the hand wrapped around the pole loosens, being sucked away. Ouch, a passing thought right then came to light when writing this, trying to show something. My life feels like this, trying to show me something. Letting go, it’s this, yet memories hold life together, feels like no memories no life.Yet here my body is, resting writing this, a knowing that it’s present, a million miles have passed by, is the holding on the process of letting go, to free kife from this entanglement x 

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 Be of service: bad advice Wednesday

hi lovely i was trying to write something on your survey, but I couldn't write to you like that as it doesn't feel right Clare i have to write directly to you and then it flows well Clare that afternoon as i was sitting there somehow i ended sitting where everybody was looking because you both was alongside of me, and I could feel that i was ticking my shoulders were going my eyes were going and my hands couldn't stop moving as I was sitting there I felt everyone was looking my way and they could see me so I held onto my jeans with all my heart, because it was breaking open every single shame and fear was in that room that day for me and I had nowhere to hide I felt my body running as it was staying still I could see the your latch on the door in front of me, i even Felt my thumb opening it and running but somehow, I stayed and in my staying i felt tears in my eyes that I held back because i didn't want everyone to see me like that i was ina room with every relationship I ever had and i sat there for hours like that into there was no one sitting there so yer what was a course on relationships in the end there was no relationships love you 

Waking from a dream that felt true and I’ve been awake thinking about it as though the situation is going to happened again when coming into contact with this person who attacked me randomly. Training in boxing for eight months, moved 900ks away and haven’t thought about it until now. It’s making feel anxious as around this time his partner comes up to the hinterland where my life moved too as we know the same people. Reporting to the police who wanted to press charges and get an AVO. Opting just to make a record, didn’t want to cause a scene for friendships that are no longer there anyway from this situation. Making lots of new friends from this move, haven’t made contact with any of the old ones, yet getting triggered from these thoughts, even though it’s only a dream, they still feel real.Feeling anger and hurt from his aggression towards me and for creating this separation with my friends. Even brought him into my friendships, didn’t know he was a narcissist who has hardly any friends of his own, found out after this happened.He is an excellent manipulator with words. Feels like the movie Dirty Rotton Scoundrels.Building up those friendships over the years to now gone through this conman! Still stuck in anger and it’s me who hasn’t  moved on.Is it me creating stories that are not true.Is it me who created all of this through my thoughts, actions and self image.Is it me that can create change, can generate good thoughts towards him, so that if he is around again, would sending him love without any judgment, any fears, any harm towards myself be the way forward.The trigger is my father flight or fight I had to deal with throughout my childhood and teenage years, getting hit, five minutes later seeing if I want an ice cream xHaving had long conversation and many years in Dads company talking about it until one day, we resolved it and moved on.But as we know, healing part is one thing, triggers come into play at any given time.Maybe recognising this as a dream and my thoughts around it, enabling me not to get triggered.How to feel and be present with this feeling. Lots of question to answer.

Sara Priestley on human design: Sunday Conversation 

Designing the mind: Ryan A Bush; Saturday book 

Clare if you can say one thing to the world that's gonna really help, what would it be?

As I continue to explore this understanding in your membership, I am beginning to wonder if we have values.  So many self-help programs speak of living by your values but if there is no Doer then are values just part of the illusion of separate self?  

Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.Bad advice wednesday. 

I was thinking some people in this conversation are in their minds and not in world so much. I had the same but in reverse i was in the world but never could i be in my mind. I thought the world and mind was separate. I  can see now you can be in both and more and more my mind and the world are the same. I can be in my own mind now when I need to be and watch and observe the mind with a great deal of love and compassion for it's ways 

A brief summary of this episode

Jim and I had a conversation in the membership group about discomfort and what it is revealing. I asked his permission to share it outside the group. 

So good they can't ignore you: Cal Newport. Saturday book 

I have strugrled with explosive temper resulting in lashing out.My emotinns are triggerd by feelings of injustice done towards me. I suppose by expressing anger one feels justified standing upto the injustice. If you can help with some tools as to how can the self feel ok and not express anger even in the face of injustice and how to navigate it in a better way. I feel terrible after i have lashed out and the feeling of anger is gone,also nothing actually is achieved with display of anger but in the moment its so difficult to remeber this and not lash out. Thanks

Was wondering how to recognize a difference between having personal criteria for certain things and conditioning? Is this the same thing and conditioning got a bad reputation in these conversations, always being seen as a partybreaker?Example: My criteria for an intimate relationship is with a person who can commit to a monogamous relationship. I don't see a point to inquire anything about that. Tosearch for gifts in this.

Bad advice: Prioritise your mental health by...Prioritize your mental health by distancing yourself from people who create drama and toxicity in your life. Set boundaries and surround yourself with a peaceful circle that loves you, supports you, and wants the best for you.

Seeing and honouring the child vs finding comfort in the victim hood that our experiences seem to justify. I find this subtlety difficult. There's such a delicious sadness in my victimhood.

A brief summary of this episode

On Sundays where possible I will publish conversations either with other teachers or with people on my programmes in which we look at different aspects of self and other. Today is a conversation with Piers Thurston recorded for his podcast about the nature of free will. 

The Expectation Effect by David Robson: The Saturday book

I wonder what really causes beliefs to shift? Before this conversation I would have said experiential learning. Now that still looks true, but bizarrely without a learner or doer or knower

This I wanna ask since I read your book Ease and it really got my attention & find it powerful, but at the same time I can't get my head around it. You mentioned it again at our relationship retreat last week.It goes like : I need attention from my mother and my ignoring mother is the same thing.Can you say more to that? Is that literally the other end of the same conditioning, same content? Thank you a lot.Love you to the moon and back :)

Is there such a thing as freedom? Listener question 

Is there such a thing as innate resilience and if so how do I access mine? 

A brief summary of this episode

I heard clearly what has confused me in conversations, mentioning "(personal) thoughts/believes" and "wisdom."What I heard was: "I was thinking about me being scared of something and when someone was in need I did the thing I was scared of." "My thinking fell away and wisdom came, so I just did it, without thinking."And now I saw, how sometimes I kind of wait for wisdom to come. But what is it? My thoughts not always look like wisdom at all and what I am doing neither 😀.So wisdom and thoughts? It came up to me that I always heard this as a separation and now I heard "wisdom" as a thought too: "If people are in need like this I have to help them." This thought just came up instead of the thought: "I am scared of...." and he did what he thought he had to do maybe before another thought came up.I guess it is not about wisdom OR thoughts/believes. It is all wisdom or all thoughts. And as I hear "thoughts" being not as good as wisdom I will call all of it wisdom: So for example: My thinking "I am not good at this" and I will not do it, is wisdom too. I safe myself. That is good (in my opinion). "I am not good at this" and I will do it, is wisdom too. I challenge myself. That is good (in her opinion). So we are all wise 😀. We don't have to wait. Do we? What do you think? If you like to think about this ofcourse. Thank you for reading!