Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We're calling this a siege even if Petyr isn't. Why aren't there any chickens in the Eyrie? And why is Petyr so gross? No one wants to see Littlefinger die more than we do. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Alayne I (Sansa II). Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 559

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. The House of Black and White is a cult and you cannot tell us otherwise. Drink if the Kindly Man asks Arya who she is. Chug if he says "you lie." A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Arya II. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 558

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. When everything that can go wrong, does and it’s because Arianne’s cohort seems to be straight out of a lethal version of Scooby Doo. No strategy, just vibes and snacks for the road. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - The Queenmaker (Arianne I). Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 557

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Brienne is smarter than anyone thinks. What is going on with the Squishers anyway? George’s sour grapes about that Hugo loss mean Brienne beat the crap out of Harry Potter. Did Brienne accidentally make a weirwood sacrifice? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Brienne IV (repost). Originally recorded in 2019.

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Come on down for the Iron Islands Kingsmoot which is a combo religious revival meeting/political convention where every Greyjoy nuncle is crazier than the last and the pirate lifestyle ages you terribly. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - The Drowned Man (Aeron II).   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 555

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. What is worse than a car show? One with your incestuous uncles, only the cars are boats. Randyll Tarly should get Harrenhal next. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - The Iron Captain (Victarion I).   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 554

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Podcasting direct from the Sapphire Isle, we've got empty bladders, full cups and all of your questions in this special first EVER in-person Drunkcast Q&A episode. Hey, it only took us ten years to make this happen. A Song of Ice and Fire. In-person Drunkcast Q&A. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 553

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We’re all gonna need some wine to get through this committee meeting. Qyburn is the under-appreciated Westerosi Martha Stewart. Lots of heads floating around. Cersei sings "If They Could See Me Now". And LoT gives Ash a Jumbotron proposal she can’t refuse. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Cersei IV. Originally recorded in 2016.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 552

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. There's kittens for everyone in King Tommen's land. Kevan and Loras get some great one-liners, but Jaime's quips are wasted on the likes of Lancel. Cersei's at her wine-throwing worst, and Jaime's having none of it. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Jaime II. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 551

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We're already very warmed up for our cold open, so enjoy the extra intro as we once again drunkenly podcast from "Tarth." We learn that all of our literary comprehension, foreshadowing and wild speculation will never compare to the accuracy of the Star Trek Tarot cards. It's the Drunkcast Prediction Episode! A Song of Ice and Fire. In-person Drunkcast - Predictions.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 550

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Gilly has our heartstrings as she and Sam are on the cruise from hell. We would have figured out a way to smuggle two babies out. Meanwhile we’re all getting old. The Eyrie might be a good place for a weekend but we wouldn’t want to live there. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Samwell II.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 549

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Welcome to "Loathed No More," a Jaime/Brienne love story. We don't want Hyle Hunt for Brienne, but maybe we want him for ourselves? Is Mark Mullendore the Ross of the Knights of Summer? Maybe, but Brienne is definitely the Captain America of Westeros. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Brienne III. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 548

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Trigger warning for gross objectification as Ser Arys Oakhart navigates Dorne and Arianne Martell. Our listeners love Greyjoys for some reason. We're not judging for you it. In an alternate reality, Damphair would have been a great EMT. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - The Soiled Knight.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 547

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Will Cersei ever learn that paranoia will destroy ya? Speaking of destruction, let us mourn Tyrion’s porn stash. Tommen is the Bubble Boy. Spiced wine is the answer for everything and who knew that Robert was the glue holding Jaime and Cersei’s love together? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Cersei III. Originally recorded in 2015.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 546

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. With Asha and The Reader, maybe the Ironborn aren't so bad after all? Theon Greyjoy! Go see your Mama! Does Tristifer Botley understand how anatomy works, or is he expecting a Kraken to show up with his dozen children? And, we get some meaty questions on Lady Stoneheart, the Targs, and why Dany gets so much fandom hate. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - The Kraken's Daughter - Asha I. Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 545

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. If you’ve lost your fingers, how can you play the harp 24/7? Who does Petyr love? Whatever is going on at the Eyrie, #itscomplicated and we are here for Sansa. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - AFfC Sansa I

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Every time Brienne takes a bath she thinks of Jaime, confirmed. Pod breaks our hearts. There are some things Brienne would give up her honor for… Why do people hate happiness, and genitals? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - AFfC Brienne II. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 543

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. The Vigil that outstinks all Vigil’s. Pycelle is Tywin’s biggest stan. Jaime decides getting nasty next to the dead body of a family member might not be proper, finally. Jaime and Tommen bond over going away inside. A Feast for Crows - Jaime I. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 542

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Tommen throws pennies “to” the people. Are farts as useless as nipples on a breastplate? Gregor’s a milk of the puppy junkie. This is Cersei Unchained. We’ll miss you most of all, wine. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Cersei II Originally recorded in 2015.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 541

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. This is not the place to learn about life on a ship. How does the Titan roar, anyway? The House of Black and White is creepy but in an interesting way. Someone explain why she tries to eat that worm. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Arya I.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 540

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. George R. R. Martin is absolutely using Sam as a self-insert in this chapter. Does Sam not understand he can check books out of the library? Jon knows his Stannis situation looks bad from the outside. Does Jon need to go this hard at killing the boy? We’re all Team Gilly. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Samwell I.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 539

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Everything about Brienne is ugly, except for her eyes. And her soul. And her mare, which is not a piebald. We get inside Brienne's head and , no surprise, it's a beautiful place to be. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Brienne I. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 538

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. You may love a Targaryen. Lot’s surprised we’re defending Cersei. Guile calls out the Cersei x Qyburn meet cute. We're all bonding over platonic Shea questioning. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Cersei I. Originally recorded in 2015.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 537

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Dorne seems delightful as the metaphors literally drop from the sky. We meet the Sand Snakes through the male gaze, but at least we can fall back on our other senses with those delicious descriptions of Dornish food. Yum!! Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - The Captain of Guards. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 536

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Is this the worst chapter in all of the books? Maybe, because the Iron Islands suck. Is it Damphair or Damfere and is he naked this entire chapter? Kingsmoot! Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A A Feast for Crows: The Prophet. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 535

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Magic is back! But what are these guys' names? We're as confused as readers back in 2006 at all of the new faces as we start in on Feast. At least Oldtown seems cool. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast For Crows Prologue. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 534

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. As we look back on Storm, is it really all Jaime and Brienne's fault that these books aren't finished? We talk about our favorite scenes, POVs and duos and more. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords Retrospective. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 533

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. When they go low, we go lower...so let's talk about the Freys! Was the Red Wedding a $5,000 dragon affair, or a $50,000 dragon gala? Either way, the sweet playlists of Roose Bolton & Lame Lothar's Wedding Planners will make your night. But now for a serious question, who was Lady Stoneheart's neck flap holder? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Epilogue. Originally recorded in 2017 Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 532

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's murder in a winter wonderland! But oh what a wonderland it is. We want to linger in the beauty of a snowy Winterfell, but the Moon Door beckons. Lysa deserves our sympathy, and she also deserves to binge watch a few shows on the Westerosi version of OWN. Oh, and stop trying to make Hot Hyle happen. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Sansa VII. Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 531

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Hail, hail the gang's all here. Jon ponders the life he could have, but could never have. We ponder Bloodraven's involvement in the whole thing and we get the glorious return of Ghost. GHOST! Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon XII Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 530

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Sam gets his electioneering on. Melisandre gets to talk to someone who already knows about Azor Ahai and we get to fall in love with peak Stannis. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Samwell V.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 529

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Hail, hail the gang's all here. It's been ten years, people. "Azor Ahai truly is the friends we made along the way." Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. 10th Anniversary Episode   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 528

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Your banter with Tyrion is awesome, even when you're breaking each other's hearts. Tyrion and Varys hold hands through the creepiest date night ever. Shae pets the wrong cat and Tywin gets what's coming to him as we finally close the door on Tyrion's chapters. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Tyrion XI. Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 527

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Stannis is looking for his Davos in Jon while Melisandre is here to save Stannis from his middle child woes, but would a hot woman choose to smell like blood and smoke? Stannis offers Jon everything he's ever wanted, but is Winterfell worth the price of dealing with wildling bs for years? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon XI.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 526

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Sam is back at the Wall where George knows nothing about breastfeeding and they're convening the equivalent of the papal conclave to elect a lord commander. We consider questions such as: is life with Craster enough training to survive Randyll Tarly? And just what does freezer burned mammoth taste like? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Samwell IV.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 525

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It wouldn't be ASoIaF if someone wasn't dumping boiled wine on someone, but we're at the end of Arya's Storm journey and what a sad little journey it's been. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Arya XIII.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 524

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jon is set up for failure by those two lovable scamps: Janos and Alliser when he's sent to meet with Mance. We still like Book Tormund, but we have real questions about George's sense of scale and the logic of the arrival of the cavalry. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon X.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 523

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. No more heavy leanings! Cersei tries to blow Jaime right out of the Kingsguard, but he's too busy rehearsing his big speech to Brienne. Jaime and Brienne act like awkward teenagers, and then Jaime acts like a man who can do whatever he chooses. Whatever he chooses. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jaime IX. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 522

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Dany's conquered yet another city state, but it's very much two steps forward, three steps back for her as she deals with the fallout and Jorah's crappy YouTube apology. Hell has frozen over and we find that we're the Dany Defense Squad now. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Daenerys VI.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 521

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Is Tywin a dad of his word? We’re not so sure. We are pretty sure he’s being poisoned, though. Tyrion’s putting all his faith in the Red Viper, and we wonder why Tywin didn’t see that coming. Join us for Inigo Montoya vs. The Mountain, a trial by combat for the ages, but not for the faint of heart. Just remember that snakes have no hands, but they do have eyes and teeth--or at least they used to. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Tyrion X. Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 520

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jon and what's left at the Night's Watch are tired and so are we. We're not quite sure what the Turtle is, but our heroes are throwing stuff at the wall to see what sticks despite or because of GRRM's Looney Tunes physics. Janos Slynt arrives to spoil Jon's first good night of sleep in a while. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon IX.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 519

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's time to get your PEEEETYR on, as Littlefinger moves from his Tiny House in the Fingers to a deluxe apartment in the sky. Will Sansa move from pawn to player? Could GRRM possibly have more SanSan foreshadowing in this chapter? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Sansa VI. Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 518

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It’s time for King’s Landing Cribs Edition, where the magic doesn’t happen. Are you a gasoline kinda gal or do you prefer manure? All we know is we’re not into the smell of rotting flesh. Jaime trusts Loras will fall in love with Brienne if he just spends a few minutes alone with her. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jaime VIII - originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 517

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's the trial of the young century and with Cersei McBeal in charge, things don't look good for Tyrion. We get another sweet, fleeting taste of the sexy Oberyn Martell, but inquiring minds want to know - did Oberyn get a taste of Cersei? GRRM is the Jaime and Brienne fanfic author of our dreams and we want more. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Tyrion IX. Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 516

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Join us as Arya takes a tour through every stage of grief and evidences some abandonment issues and we realize this episode should be sponsored by a therapy service. Tyrion's buddies are thriving and we realize that in another universe, Sandor has a future as a camp counselor for damaged children. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Arya XII.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 515

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Things are bleak at the Wall, but Donal Noye, total badass that he is, and Jon are on it even if he is only 16. If we were looking at the HR roster for the Watch, he'd be our pick for command t Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon VIII.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 514

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Davos may not have all his fingertips, but he's sure got balls. Robert's kids are awesome and we'll definitely miss the Davos/Stannis/Melisandre not-so-fun-times chapters. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Davos VI.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 513

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jaime’s homecoming sucks. Cersei gives, but we must ask. Sure Jaime’s a deadbeat dad, but Joff really was a dick. And Jaime might be good at bluffing, but Tywin always wins the staring contests. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jaime VII (repost). Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 512

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Sansa turns from porcelain, to ivory, to steel, but finds herself fleeing from one terrible situation to another. Littlefinger's plots make almost as much sense as his ways of wooing women. We mourn the lack of SanSan in the show, and wonder if Sansa will ever get to actually kiss a half decent man. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Sansa V (repost). Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 511