My subconscious decided to fire shots at me. This is my first experience with a personal attack from myself to me. So you were wronged… are you going to play victim for the rest of eternity? Stop it. Don’t @ me when I say I’m never getting married again tomorrow. I told you I’m personally attacking myself… and you. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Picking up from Pt 1 last week, here is Pt 2 of what my mother taught me unintentionally, informed by the idea that we become what we see, not what we are told to be, unless we put mental interventions in place like therapy, consciousness, knowledge, learning, and unlearning. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Inspired by the short film “Legacy” in which Dove uses an experiment to demonstrate that children copy their parents’ insecurities, I am sharing some of the things (good, bad, and maybe even funny) my mother unintentionally taught me. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Is year-end fatigue setting in? Yeah, me too. I’m also a little jet-lagged. That’s probably why a refresher on the little things that build big results seemed like such a good idea. Here is a collection of thoughts and ideas to help with the refresh from the book, The 12 Week Year by Brian Moran and Michael Lemmington. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Let’s discuss “Father Forgets,” a poem by William Livingston Larned. I came across it while reading Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Disclaimer: I have a tenacious chest infection that causes my voice to dip in order to minimise the sudden and unavoidable coughing fit that results from speaking too animatedly. Welcome to our coffee date. Today I tell you stories from different books and what they have driven me to consider as I begin re-reading some of my favourite books. Featured books and resources are: How the One-Armed Sister Sweeps her House; The Secret Lives of Baba Segi’s wives; Steve Harvey, Adam Grant & Trevor Noah together; and Esther Perel on relational intelligence. Somehow it all comes together. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Hello hi. Welcome to this week’s coffee date. This week’s installment is a full summary of Robert Greene’s 48 Laws of Power. A link to the source is below. I sound a little apologetic and give a lot of disclaimers because Robert Greene’s work is controversial because it is Machiavellian. Be that as it may, it is not my part of my purpose to be the information police. I share books and this is a book. A bestseller at that. Comments on the subject are usually about people grappling with the moral questions or renouncing it as evil. Knowledge is power. I think it boils down to this: What we do with it is about who we are. Enjoy! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Hello hi. Welcome to this week’s coffee date. This week’s installment is special because I am a huge fan of Esther Perel’s work and I am deliberately stepping more fully into the “holistic” part of the holistic success I like to talk about so much. Esther Perel’s talk on relational intelligence will have you rethinking what you think you know. A link to the source is below. Enjoy! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Hello hi. Welcome to our coffee date. I probably needed this episode more than you did. Robert Greene’s thoughts on the Charles Darwin story and the window between graduation and recognition is everything we each need to remember when facing a new opportunity. What have masters gone by filled that space with? This should have been part of the make yourself unforgettable series. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

source: Simon Sinek & Trevor Noah on Friendship, Loneliness, Vulnerability, and More. In short, why friendship is the hero ingredient to a holistically successful life. Available on Simon Sinek’s Youtube channel or via the link below. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Imagine this: You’re sitting at a dinner party, and the conversation drifts to relationships. One guest says, "I’d never divorce a woman who cooks like this." Laughter ensues, but underneath that joke lies a troubling assumption—one that equates a happy marriage with culinary skills.Now, think about how often we use similar, oversimplified metrics in other areas of our lives. I am a little tired and my mouth is dry but please indulge me and let’s talk about it. Just when you think the episode is done, I will randomly talk about an apple a day :D This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

In this week’s coffee date, we go to the deep places to talk about why som experts say that the life partner you select is the most important career decision of your life. What exactly happens when you get it wrong? This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

In today’s express coffee date I share a train of thought kick-started by Tom Sharpe’s The Gropes. Have you, in an unfortunate fit of cleverness, ever hidden something from others and planned to come back for it only to find that you were so clever that even you can’t find it again? This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

In this week’s coffee date we discuss thoughts from unrelated sources all inspired by Whitney Houston that come together to teach and inspire thoughts around inspiration versus imitation. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

The world’s most successful YouTuber and Malcolm Gladwell in Outliers have very different ways of sharing similar sentiments on how to succeed. This week’s Thursday express episode is here with the usual 10-minute idea that’s just food for thought as you go into the weekend. Enjoy it. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Why have so many lotto winners gone bankrupt? Would you go bankrupt too? Let’s talk about it on this week’s coffee date. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

A thought for the week in 10 short minutes inspired by @tonfifi on Instagram. Let’s talk about “a surge of audacity.” This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

On today’s coffee date, we discuss 3 ideas that are worth fully grasping because people often confuse them with different concepts that mean something else entirely: humility is self-deprecation, patience is not sitting and waiting, and knowing your “enough” is not putting a cap on your ambition or dreams. Let’s talk about it. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Spoiler alert: one is healthy. The other is not. Yet, one is routinely confused with the other. Let’s end that confusion in this express episode's little corner of the internet. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

In this episode, we dive into Brené Brown's powerful "Lake Travis Story," where she unpacks exactly why the phrase "the story I’m telling myself is" is so powerful that it is used both by fortune 500 CEOs and successfully married couples. This concept helps us engage more deeply with our emotions and assumptions, leading to more honest and vulnerable conversations. Brené uses a personal story involving her husband to illustrate how this simple phrase can shift our perspective and improve communication. By acknowledging the stories we create in our minds, we can navigate difficult emotions, strengthen relationships, and foster greater understanding and connection. Right up our coffee date alley, not so? Let’s dive in. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Guess who’s back? Back again? We are back!!! Tell a friend. I figured I would rest and rethink the podcast. I really imagined I would be thinking about scaling back. Turns out my intellectual brain and my creative brain don’t have the same ideas. The creative brain won so, now, the podcast will be coming to you in long form on Tuesdays and in short form on Thursdays. Meet Thursday’s Express Chai! It’s an episode about 10 minutes long and it…. well, I tell you about it in this episode. See you Tuesday! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

The Podcast is one year old this Tuesday. Remember the days of #CareerTuesday? Me too! It's a little unbelievable that a year has passed since my first shaky episode of the pod. I guess it really is true that you should just start that thing. To mark the occasion, this week's coffee date is a heart-to-heart. I don't have any major regrets in life but some lessons could have done me a favour by showing up a little sooner. Let's talk about those. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Welcome to our coffee date. Today we continue the Crafting an Unforgettable Presence series inspired by the book "Make Yourself Unforgettable" by Dale Carnegie. In this series, we feature little-known stories about little-known folks (by popular culture standards at least) who have an incredible amount to teach us. People like today's subject: Sir Arthur Lewis, the first black Nobel Prize winner. He was also the first black many things as you will hear. I hope he inspires you as he did me. By the way, we are one episode away from a year of episodes. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Hello hi. Welcome to our coffee date. This week we are adding the Stockfish Story to the Crafting an Unforgettable Presence series. The series is inspired by Dale Carnegie’s book, “Make Yourself Unforgettable.” The story is inspired by Mark Manson’s book, “Everything is F*cked: A Book About Hope.” I chose this story for its ability to illustrate how one seemingly innocuous skill set can unseat any champion who does not possess it. You and I are no exception. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

This is a toolkit episode. Instead of the usual thesis of change, toolkit episodes speak to specific actions to achieve a particular result. In this instance, getting on with doing stuff instead of the getting stuck in the cycle of intentions with no actions. It's about execution. The toolkit is from the book "The 12 Week Year" by Brian P Moran and Michael Lemmington. I also share how the toolkit helped me achieve my fitness goals. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Once upon a time, my life as it is now was beyond my wildest dreams. And then it wasn’t. The ideas in this installment changed and navigated me here; sharing is caring. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Life is an exercise in feeling, being human and learning. Your relationship with yourself is no exception. Given who you are follows you everywhere, perhaps the greatest chance of success you have is to not run from “yourselves” but to go out with lanterns and seek out each one. Welcome to our weekly coffee date. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

We've all encountered shame and will likely encounter it again in the future. Instead of ignoring this aspect of life, it's crucial to acknowledge and normalize it. This approach enables us to manage shame constructively, foster connections with others, and emerge from challenging experiences with our self-esteem preserved. You will recall the podcast episode in which I explained that your self-worth is guaranteed and your self-esteem is your perception of your worth and that can be high or low or otherwise waiver according to the strength of your relationship with yourself. When you feel shame, for example, you feel less worthy but your actual worth has not changed. It is also important to recognise that shame often is also a master at disguising itself as other things or emotions. It can present as concern, anger, fear of what people will say, guilt, fear of disappointing God, feeling deserving of punishment from God, or defensiveness. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

In this episode, we delve into the timeless fable of "Who Moved My Cheese" by Dr. Spencer Johnson. The fable revolves around four characters living in a maze who are on a quest for cheese, representing various approaches to change and adaptation. Maybe you will see yourself in one or all of them. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

This could easily be a part of the Crafting an Unforgettable Presence Series. I will let it stand alone though. Inspired and informed by Chapter 8 of Mark Manson's book, "Everything is F*cked: A Book About Hope," this week's episode is a presentation of a line of thought meant to provoke you to think deeply about the seemingly innocuous choices you make every day and where you (and your money) (and your love life) (and your time) end up. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Part 2/2 - “These life lessons are widely known from the highly popular column by Regina Brett. “45 lessons, written by a 90 year old” was originally featured in the Plain Dealer Newspaper in Cleveland, Ohio. Since then, it has gone on to spread the story that Regina is now 90 years old. She is really only in her ’50s, but nonetheless, this Pulitzer Prize finalist has a wealth of knowledge and life lessons that you would think she truly was in her 90’s. Anyone can pick up helpful life lessons from this list.” This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

“These life lessons are widely known from the highly popular column by Regina Brett. “45 lessons, written by a 90 year old” was originally featured in the Plain Dealer Newspaper in Cleveland, Ohio. Since then, it has gone on to spread the story that Regina is now 90 years old. She is really only in her ’50s, but nonetheless, this Pulitzer Prize finalist has a wealth of knowledge and life lessons that you would think she truly was in her 90’s. Anyone can pick up helpful life lessons from this list.” This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Hello hi. Welcome to our coffee date. Today we continue the Crafting an Unforgettable Presence series. Walking through Charles Bukowski's story we gingerly navigate some of the darker aspects of the journey to success and distinguish holistic success from financial success. It’s such a difficult story to tell. It also has a lot of uncomfortable and necessary lessons to teach. Lessons that are foundational pieces in crafting an unforgettable presence. The series was inspired by Dale Carnegie's Book "Make Yourself Unforgettable' and informed by Mark Manson's "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*uck." This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Hello hi. On this week's coffee date, we are talking about the 75 Hard challenge created by Andy Frisella. I just completed it for the first time and these are the things I learnt that could add value to life and our ongoing conversation on demystifying success. If you enjoy this installment, please like, share, subscribe, or rate. I appreciate each person who takes the time to do so. Thank you for meeting me here every week. Let's grow together. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

We love to talk about the big things on our coffee dates. The devil is in the small things. Inspired by Scott Galloway's book, The Algebra of Happiness, let's talk about the little things that mean everything to the success of the big things for a moment. I have included a thought-provoking e-mail exchange. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Permit me to shake up your view of your choices in life and what influences them. When you don't put your hand up for something you deserve or have earned for example, what is really stopping you? This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Today’s coffee date is a building block episode. The “How To” will follow but let’s get the basics right. Self-Worth, Self-Esteem & Security aren't the same thing. Understanding how they differ is important so you can build rooted confidence and not baseless grandiosity. Weaving these 3 together will create a golden thread that will impact your social life, love life, friendships, professional life, and relationship with yourself. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

We glorify independence, don’t we? We do. It’s easy. It’s because it is such a difficult thing for most of us to achieve in a world filled with co-dependence, financial considerations, and life doing what life does. Independence seems like an achievement because it is one. In particular, if we achieve independence as a result of trauma, we easily slip into hyper-independence and are applauded for it. As a result, we sometimes forget that there is a level above that. Interdependence. Interdependence in a relationship, as defined by Stephen Covey, entails the mutual reliance and cooperation between individuals. Stephen emphasizes that interdependent relationships are characterized by synergy, where the combined efforts of individuals lead to greater outcomes than what could be achieved individually. It involves recognizing and respecting the strengths and contributions of each person while working collaboratively towards shared goals. In interdependent relationships, individuals are not merely independent or dependent but rather understand the value of cooperation and synergy. Covey emphasizes that true success and fulfillment in relationships come from embracing interdependence and combining efforts with others to achieve collective success. It's about combining strengths, supporting each other, and working together toward mutual growth and fulfillment. Have you scaled to interdependence? Let’s have coffee and chat. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

I researched and created a wealth blueprint for us to discuss on our coffee date this week. Join me on this episode of the podcast as we explore insights on decision-making, overcoming limitations, creative living, and the importance of asking why from various thought leaders across different fields including Mel Robbins, Steven Bartlett, Obama, Elizabeth Gilbert, and a Hip Hop Star's Butler. Tune in to gain valuable perspectives and strategies for building your wealth. If you enjoy this episode of the podcast, please like, share, and/or subscribe. The podcast has ranked in the Top 5 career podcasts on average on Apple Podcasts in 7 countries over the last 30 days thanks to each person who likes, rates, and shares. Thank you so much. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Today is special. I arranged a special coffee date for you with some of the greatest minds of our time. Together, Brene Brown, Michelle Obama, Jasprit Singh, Jay Shetty, Barack Obama, Adam Grant, and others bring their thoughts together to elevate the discussion on authenticity, the pursuit of wealth, going further rather than faster and so much more. If you enjoy the episode, please like, share, comment, subscribe and review. I so appreciate every review I receive. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

In this episode of Dirty Chai with Chio, titled "Hitched for Success," I delve into the transformative power of conscious coupling. Drawing inspiration from Sheryl Sandberg's perspective on empowering men at home to foster equality, I explore how shared responsibilities within relationships can unlock mutual professional and personal fulfillment. Additionally, I unpack Aviva Vittenburg Cox's enlightening TED Talk on conscious coupling, shedding light on the profound impact of intentional partnerships on individual growth and societal progress. Through engaging anecdotes and thought-provoking insights, I navigate the intricacies of modern relationships, highlighting their pivotal role in shaping our paths to success. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Welcome to our coffee date. I have a fun question for you: What do the story about the frog in boiling water, Adam Grant's book Think Again, Yuval Noah Harari's book Sapiens, and Dr Ali Abdaal’s interview on Steve Bartlett's Podcast called Diary of a CEO have in common? They all helped me put this story and idea together. Ever wondered why America is not named after Columbus? Let me tell you how an unknown person came to have America named after them. It’s the Columbus story as you have never heard it. If you enjoy the episode, please like, share, subscribe and review. I am truly grateful to each person who does this. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Welcome to our coffee date. I met Christopher Langan for the first time in chapter 3 of Malcolm Gladwell’s book, Outliers. As I read on I learnt that a man with an IQ 45 points higher than Einstein, who taught himself to read by 3 and fell asleep during his SATs but still scored a perfect score among many other things, wasn’t living the life I imagined. Why? Is it a lie that IQ is a cornerstone of success? This story has all the answers. We even accidentally demystified Robert Oppenheimer along the way too and I may or may not have cried once or twice (I can neither confirm nor deny :D ) —one of the most informative episodes yet in the “Crafting an Unforgettable Presence” Series. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

In this week’s coffee date, we explore the life of automotive pioneer Walter Chrysler on the Dirty Chai Podcast with Chio's new series, "Crafting an Unforgettable Presence." Uncover the untold lessons from Chrysler's journey, demystifying the path to success… let’s take a look under the hood if you will. Join us as we delve into his strategic brilliance, resilience, and innovation, unraveling key insights applicable to personal and professional growth for each of us. This episode marks the beginning of a captivating series aimed at crafting your own unforgettable presence. Don't miss this chance. The series is inspired by Dale Carnegie Training’s book, “Make Yourself Unforgettable.” This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Happy New Year! In this first episode of 2024, we explore the art of traveling light emotionally and psychologically as we step into the new year. Dive into practical insights and transformative tips that promise mental clarity, emotional well-being, and spiritual resonance. Let’s take a moment to dust out the mental spaces in our ongoing gentle pursuit of holistic success. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

The year is ending. Let’s take a look back at 2023. The intro to the podcast references learning emotional regulation. 2023 required a lot of that from me in my career. I had to learn to walk when I wanted to run. To breathe when I wanted to hold my breath. To tread water when all I wanted was certainty. What lessons did 2023 bring you? This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

We are getting ready to rest and plan for the new year. Here are some of the ideas that have changed my life for the better over the last 3 years to throw into the mix. Let’s call it a vision series. The books featured today are Brene Brown’s Daring Greatly, Morgan Housel’s The Psychology of Money, Glennon Doyle’s Untamed, Malcolm Gladwell’s Tipping Point, and Mark Manson’s The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*uck. Thank you for listening. Please do me a favour and rate the podcast in your listening app of choice. It makes a huge difference for me. Thank you so much. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com

Being told to be afraid sounds counter-intuitive because it goes against the common narrative. And yet, research shows that feeling fear puts you on the right side of history and makes you more likely to succeed. Let’s talk about it. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chioneso.substack.com