Dr. Rick joins Forrest for a deep dive into harnessing our natural generativity. How can we become more productive and creative, experience greater satisfaction, and lean into our biological drives to get more of what we want out of life? They explore what a drive is, our natural drive states, and what we can learn from models of motivation like self-determination theory, before moving on to what we can do if generativity doesn’t come naturally to us. Rick and Forrest share how we can lean into enjoyable experiences, feel more competent and autonomous, and learn to brave experiences of failure. The second half of the episode focuses on psychological tools that help us activate, enjoy, and hang out in generative states more often. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Register for Rick’s Yearly Program! The Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like compassion, mindfulness, confidence, motivation, and courage. It’s Rick’s flagship program, and if you like Being Well you’ll probably love it. Visit FWBProgram.com to learn more, and get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20.  Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:10: Rick's ability to stay generative. 3:25: Motivation, aggression, and our interdependence with others 12:10: A theoretical framework for generative drive  14:50: The process of making something as a form of healing 19:30: Confidence, autonomy, and relatedness 23:55: The way we think of ourselves 28:10: Agency, and what we can and cannot influence 34:30: Comfort with aggression 40:55: Work ethic, the role of passion and enjoyment, and finding your why 47:45: Competency and flow 50:55: Having positive associations with effort 57:10: Enriching vs. absorbing our experience 1:01:30: The little things that make a big difference 1:04:30: Recap Sponsors: Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’re getting toward the end of the year, and it’s a great opportunity to evaluate where we are and where we’d like to go. On today's episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest explore how we can step out of the way we've been, and into a new way of thinking, doing, and being.  They talk about self-concept, unconscious beliefs, and how those beliefs affect our behavior. Forrest then shares a model of what this kind of change tends to look like practically, which usually includes relax our attachment to the things that are holding us back. Other topics include getting down to "the tip of the root," taking a step back from our narratives, challenging limiting beliefs, taking life less personally, working with discouragement, and finding motivation and drive.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Register for Rick’s Yearly Program! The Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like compassion, mindfulness, confidence, motivation, and courage. It’s Rick’s flagship program, and if you like Being Well you’ll probably love it. Visit FWBProgram.com to learn more, and get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20.  Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:30: Self-concept, how unconscious beliefs affect behavior, and freedom 5:40: Appraisals and attributions 9:35: The way we spin our self-narrative, and holding onto grievances 14:25: Being honest with ourselves when we feel stuck 19:30: Changing behavior before changing thinking 25:15: Values and behaviors 29:05: Underlying fears and practical confusion 33:50: Taking your experiences less personally 36:05: Finding the motivation to get our hands dirty 41:30: Negativity bias and appreciative inquiry 47:45: First steps when you’re feeling discouraged 56:55: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Just as we can exercise our arms or legs to build physical strength, we can exercise our brains like we do any other muscle. Therapist Amy Morin joins Forrest to help us learn how to regulate our thoughts, manage our emotions, and become more psychologically flexible. These key skills are particularly important for building a healthy relationship. Forrest and Amy explore how couples can work together to identify their issues, deal with effort imbalances, and avoid common mistakes (like having, get this, not enough conflict).  About our Guest: Amy Morin is a licensed clinical social worker, bestselling author, and the host of the Mentally Stronger podcast.Her most recent book is 13 Things Mentally Strong Couples Don't Do, out on December 26th. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:35: Amy’s personal background, and how she got to the idea of mental strengths 7:30: Self-compassion vs. self-pity 11:05: Not giving away your power 14:50: Diagnosing root problems in relationships 18:25: When one frustration brings up all your other frustrations 22:25: The inevitability of conflict, and the vulnerability in expressing remorse 27:35: Setting the ground rules for a therapeutic conversation 31:05: When it feels like your partner isn’t invested in making changes 34:50: Learning to deconstruct reactive thoughts and misguided perceptions 38:30: Taking your thoughts with a grain of salt, and asking ‘what else might be true?’ 41:20: Scorekeeping vs. negotiating, and finding ways to meet our own needs 45:40: Giving our partner what we actually want for ourselves 49:00: Balancing desires for closeness and distance 51:15: Not being a martyr or ‘controlling through giving’ 55:30: Boundaries between partners, and how our backgrounds influence our preferences 1:00:35: Developing psychological flexibility 1:03:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Start speaking a new language in just 3 weeks with Babbel! Get 55% off at Babbel.com/BEING. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What can I do if my partner dominates conversations about our relationship? How can I navigate situations where I want to repair, but other people don’t? What’s a “highly sensitive person,” and how does it relate to conditions like complex PTSD, ADHD, and autism? In this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners.  If you’d like to have a question answered on the podcast, you can join us on Patreon or send it in to [email protected]. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: What can I do when my partner dominates relationship conversations, but also complains about me “interrupting?” 12:45: How can you repair with family members…when they don’t want to repair? 22:55: Why do intrusive thoughts arise late at night? How can we address them? 28:00: I give to a fault in my relationships. What can I do?  34:10: How do you work with the tendency to be overly competitive? 40:45: What do you think about the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) “diagnosis?” How does it relate to conditions like complex PTSD, ADHD, and autism? 55:15: Recap Sponsors: Start speaking a new language in just 3 weeks with Babbel! Get 55% off at Babbel.com/BEING. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In one of the most interesting conversations we've ever had on the podcast, Forrest is joined by clinical psychologist Dr. Jacob Ham to explore what really helps people work with - and be with - trauma. They begin with Dr. Ham's background and what drew him to trauma work before Forrest asks him how he "conceptualizes" different kinds of traumatic experiences. Dr. Ham then takes them away from the conceptual, and toward the felt.  They talk about cultivating a felt sense of connection, empathy as a way in to relationship, and the value of anger. Dr. Ham shares about his own process taking risks as a clinician, using parts work, moving away from the "false idol" of cognizing, and finding a unique way in for each individual. About our Guest: Dr. Jacob Ham is a clinical psychologist, Associate Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Mount Sinai, and the Director of the Center for Complex Trauma. He was the therapist former podcast guest Stephanie Foo wrote about in her wonderful book What My Bones Know. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:30: Jacob’s background 5:20: Cultivating a felt sense of connection vs. idolizing the concept of trauma 11:00: A monastic, medical, and artistic approach 13:00: Knowing our intentions, and feeling others’ pain as a therapist 18:00: Surrendering to overwhelming grief 23:50: Love, vulnerability, and authenticity 29:45: The value of anger, the energy it demands, and navigating it with humility 34:45: Presence, and taking risks as a clinician 40:40: How Jacob does parts work, and finding what works with each individual 46:15: Staring at the finger that’s pointing at the moon 49:25: Does a good therapist need to have experienced trauma? 52:30: Honoring our inner protectors, surrendering to pain, and knowing it won’t last forever 56:20: Shaping others’ ability to help you, and processing trauma without professional help 1:00:15: Tipping points and surrender 1:04:15: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Start speaking a new language in just 3 weeks with Babbel! Get 55% off at Babbel.com/BEING. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ah the holidays, that blessed time of year when we come together with our highly functional family systems to engage in some good, old-fashioned fun.  If that sounded like a joke, this episode is for you.  Dr. Rick and Forrest explore how to survive the holidays with the dishes (mostly) intact. They talk about the pull of dysfunctional family systems, our tendency to return to the way things were “back then,” and balancing the desire to flip the Thanksgiving table with the desire to just make it through another year.  I thought this was one of the most interesting conversations we’ve had recently, and I hope you enjoy it. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:15: What makes the holidays tough? 5:45: The gap between who you are now and how your family system interacts with you 14:45: Parents yearning for the past, and craving gratitude 24:20: Finding agency amidst obligation 26:55: The weaponization of morality, and not needing to defend boundaries 32:45: Appreciating something about people amidst your struggles with them, and identifying the stakes 38:50: Getting through when it’s hard 43:30: The tension and ambiguity of wanting to speak up 47:00: Resourcing yourself ahead of time, and recognizing what’s in your best interest 51:50: Two kinds of grief and loss 1:01:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Start speaking a new language in just 3 weeks with Babbel! Get 55% off at Babbel.com/BEING. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Stephen Porges, the creator of the polyvagal theory, joins the podcast to walk us through how its lessons can be applied to recovering from traumatic experiences. Forrest and Dr. Porges simplify the polyvagal theory, discuss the three key states our body can rest in, and explore how we can use polyvagal practices to heal old wounds and feel safer.  About our Guest: Dr. Stephen Porges is a Distinguished University Scientist at Indiana University, Professor of Psychiatry at the University of North Carolina, and Professor Emeritus at both the University of Illinois at Chicago and the University of Maryland. He’s published more than 300 peer-reviewed papers and is the author of a number of books, including his recently released Our Polyvagal World: How Safety and Trauma Change Us. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:10: A brief overview of Polyvagal Theory (PVT) 5:20: Ventral, sympathetic, and dorsal vagal states 12:05: Relating PVT to trauma, and processing cognitively vs. in the body 19:30: Creating enough safety and co-regulation for healing work 23:30: What helps people gain awareness, safety, and regulation 27:15: Contextualizing a freeze response both psychologically and medically 30:45: Distinguishing feeling safe vs. being safe 34:10: Where to start when you don’t have a secure base in another person 37:20: How our physiology has evolved to detect psychosocial cues 39:20: How healing practices change our perception of the world 41:35: The calming effect of slow exhalation and top-down visualization 43:05: Other tools to calm the nervous system, and the need for social nourishment 47:05: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Start speaking a new language in just 3 weeks with Babbel! Get 55% off at Babbel.com/BEING. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all know that change is inevitable in life, and getting good at changing is one of the most important skills we can develop. It’s also one of the most difficult to master. On today’s episode writer and coach Brad Stulberg joins Forrest to explore how we can reshape who we are, navigate and embrace change, and become more resilient.   About our Guest: Brad focuses his work on the philosophical and psychological foundations of excellence, and the habits and practices necessary to attain it. He’s a regular contributor at The New York Times and the author of a number of wonderful books including The Practice of Groundedness and his most recent book Master of Change: How to Excel When Everything Is Changing – Including You.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:15: How Brad has come to think about change 3:30: Rethinking homeostasis and allostasis 6:55: Suffering, resistance, and rugged flexibility 13:00: Creating a more flexible identity 20:30: Not going ‘all in all the time’ 24:30: Constraints that support a healthy amount of ego 28:20: Brad’s personal challenges and supports in finding insight 34:00: Waiting to find meaning until after moving through a difficult change 39:15: Our perception of time slows during distress 41:25: Pounding a stone, and sticking with a process 45:55: Developing and retaining a sense of self-efficacy 49:20: Expecting discomfort 51:10: Turning hobbies into work, nurturing curiosity, and being a beginner 55:05: Values and perspectives 1:00:00: Shaking the snow globe, then letting it settle 1:03:10: Five questions from Brad’s book to ask yourselves 1:04:15: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Start speaking a new language in just 3 weeks with Babbel! Get 55% off at Babbel.com/BEING. Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Body Electric is an interactive six-part podcast series from NPR that investigates how our relationship with technology is impacting our health. Listen wherever you get your podcasts! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode Dr. Rick and Forrest focus on one of the most important decisions we’ll make in life: the choice to become a parent. They focus on what good parenting looks like in practice, the key difference in thinking of a child as a “means” or an “end,” and how to know whether becoming a parent is the right path for you.  Neurodharma Course! Join Dr. Rick for Neurodharma, a live, online course focused on developing seven key qualities that help us steady the mind, warm the heart, and find a reliable sense of inner peace. Neurodharma launches October 14, use code BeingWell20 for 20% off the purchase price.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:20: The significance (and uniqueness) of this choice 4:50: Being aware of your motivations for having a child 16:55: The influence of primal biology 20:50: Qualities of a good parent 30:30: Mirroring, idealizing, twinship, and the process of differentiation 36:35: Optimal frustration, and a healthy parental work ethic 41:25: The rewards of being a parent 46:45: If you don’t like __ you shouldn’t become a parent 48:50: A word for current parents who wish things had been different  53:00: Community, partnership, and resources 55:10: Meaning and fulfillment with or without a child 1:00:50: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Body Electric is an interactive six-part podcast series from NPR that investigates how our relationship with technology is impacting our health. Listen wherever you get your podcasts! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode Forrest and Dr. Rick explore how we can improve our self-confidence, allowing us to become more psychologically flexible and create healthy boundaries with other people. They explain why becoming better at something doesn’t always make us more confident, the two paths of gaining confidence and releasing insecurity, and how we can release insecurity over time. They then talk about the differences between confidence and narcissism, dealing with other people when they try to put us down, and how we can develop an authentic sense of self-worth. Neurodharma Course! Join Dr. Rick for Neurodharma, a live, online course focused on developing seven key qualities that help us steady the mind, warm the heart, and find a reliable sense of inner peace. Neurodharma launches October 14, use code BeingWell20 for 20% off the purchase price.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:15: Separating confidence and capability 8:10: Releasing insecurity vs. gaining confidence 13:25: Sources of insecurity, celebrating others’ vision, and tapping into universal currents 20:30: Redefining what a win looks like, and surrendering to the best in ourselves 26:30: Finding people who believe in you, taking action, and not knowing 31:20: Our core beliefs, why they are rational, and how to update them 34:35: Self-worth, and confidence in your own innate goodness 38:55: The difference between self-confidence and narcissism 44:00: Facing the fear of what will happen if you are confident 52:00: When being poorly received is about others and not you 54:45: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Body Electric is an interactive six-part podcast series from NPR that investigates how our relationship with technology is impacting our health. Listen wherever you get your podcasts! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How we view ourselves, other people, and the world around us has a huge impact on the emotions we feel, the choices we make, and the quality of the lives we lead. These are our perspectives, and they’re the foundation our lives are built on…which is why changing them is so freakin’ hard.  In this episode, Forrest and Rick explore what perspectives are, what a healthy perspective looks like in practice, and how we can deliberately shift our perspectives over time. Specific topics include unpacking where perspectives come from, getting better at identifying when a perspective starts to affect our behavior, and thinking of ourselves as “rivers” rather than “rocks.” By the end of this episode, you’ll learn the key skills you need to change the views that have been holding you back.  Neurodharma Course! Join Dr. Rick for Neurodharma, a live, online course focused on developing seven key qualities that help us steady the mind, warm the heart, and find a reliable sense of inner peace. Neurodharma launches October 14, use code BeingWell20 for 20% off the purchase price.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction and info on Rick’s Neurodharma course 2:10: Aspects of the kind of perspective we’re talking about 5:50: Change, being grounded in reality, and self-compassion 12:40: Fixed perspectives, fear, and a few examples from Rick 19:40: Shame, and conflict with others due to changes in behavior 22:35: Lack of self-confidence leading to rigidity 25:50: De-centering, joy, viewing yourself as a river, and playfulness 31:45: Roleplay, and asking ‘what if?’ 35:25: Inquiring into how our perspectives are constructed 44:35: Emotional imagination, and retelling your story 47:10: How our values and aspirations drive our perspective 51:50: Asking which perspectives support what’s important to you 54:05: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Body Electric is an interactive six-part podcast series from NPR that investigates how our relationship with technology is impacting our health. Listen wherever you get your podcasts! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“The mistake most of us make is building our homes in other people. When we do that, we give them the power to make us homeless.” Poet, activist, and author Najwa Zebian joins Forrest for a conversation focused on discovering what truly matters to us. They use Najwa’s personal story as a way to explore how we can break out of the roles others place us in, create healthy boundaries, and feel worthy from the inside-out. Topics include balancing intimacy and autonomy, self-compassion and self-love, and finding the courage to act authentically. About Our Guest: Najwa Zebian is an activist, poet, educator, and the author of six books including her recent works Welcome Home, Conversations on Letting Go, and The Only Constant, which will be coming out March 2024. She was raised in Lebanon and moved to Canada at 16 where she later earned her Doctorate in Educational Leadership from the University of Western Ontario. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:05: Najwa’s personal background 6:10: Humility, asking for the things you need, and comparing your pain to others 11:15: Loving your current self into becoming your authentic self 17:10: Navigating change in the face of social pressure 20:45: Intrinsic self-worth, and the beauty of being undefined 32:00: Intimacy and autonomy 40:05: Choosing vulnerability, and paying attention to surrounding influences 50:45: Healthy shared expectations in relationships 53:45: Forgiving others as a gift we give to ourselves 58:30: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Body Electric is an interactive six-part podcast series from NPR that investigates how our relationship with technology is impacting our health. Listen wherever you get your podcasts! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’re often told to “be true to ourselves:” to line-up the person we are on the outside with the person we are on the inside. In a word, to be authentic. But what does it really mean to “be who we are,” “get in touch with ourselves,” or to go full new-age “live in alignment with our higher purpose?” In this episode Dr. Rick and Forrest explore what authenticity is, where it comes from, and whether it’s actually a good thing to be more authentic. They talk about what we really mean when we use the word “authenticity,” the fragmented nature of the self, and problems with unregulated self expression. They then turn towards how we can include all of ourselves, act from our values, and become at peace with who we are.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:35: How Rick thinks about authenticity 6:10: Congruence, presentation, and the difference between honest and good 13:45: A personal example of authenticity from Rick and Forrest 17:00: Self-disclosure as a factor of intimacy 19:45: What parts of ourselves are we being authentic to? 23:15: Vulnerability and aspiration 28:10: Carl Rogers’ idea of the perceived self and the ideal self 33:20: Is self-improvement authentic? 36:30: Unconditional positive regard, and embodiment 40:10: Naming what you’re feeling, the vastness of the psyche, and self-honesty 46:25: Having a secure environment for aspirational change 48:45: Individualism, social roles, and intrinsic vs. extrinsic motivation 53:05: Archetypes, the shadow, and integration 59:20: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  The Turning Points podcast is BACK with a new season. Check out season 3 of Turning Points: Navigating Mental Health wherever you get your podcasts. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners focused on getting the most we can out of therapy, processing old painful experiences, and sabotaging ourselves. They explore the self-fulfilling nature of fear, different forms of therapy and who they can benefit, and how to approach dealing with your mind in general.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:25: My relationship anxiety is sabotaging my relationship! 7:40: Getting more out of therapy 14:00: Should people with CPTSD do cognitive therapy? 19:45: What other kinds of modalities might be beneficial? 23:05: Rick’s “gardening theory of therapy” 29:10: When and how is it appropriate to talk with your adult children about your abusive childhood? 33:30: How can a therapist draw healthy boundaries with their friends? 39:15: How would you advise a person in their mid 20s just diagnosed with ADHD? 46:25: Forrest’s partner’s experience with ADHD medication 48:50: Reframing our understanding of a psychiatric diagnosis 52:00: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In our productivity-obsessed, always-on world it’s easy for busyness to become a badge of honor. But sometimes that effort-ing transforms from the reasonable pursuit of our goals into workaholism: a compulsive, even addictive drive to work. In today’s episode Forrest and Dr. Rick explore what workaholism is really, the psychological functions it serves, and how it relates to other addictive behaviors. You’ll learn both how to approach changing behaviors like workaholism in general and specific interventions that can help. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:20: Differentiating workaholism from working hard 9:40: Preempting criticism, and your internal audience 17:10: Competence, approval seeking, and motives 23:50: Addiction without social stigma 28:40: Population groups more prone to workaholism 33:50: The stages of change  37:45: Moving to the wider view, craving and regret 40:55: Embodying your future self, and social support 43:10: Identity, and creating a coherent narrative 46:00: Underlying feelings, mindfulness, and making choices 49:20: Distinguishing being and becoming 52:25: Tracking your time, and scheduling time off 54:50: Giving others influence over your behavior 56:20: Rick’s personal experience navigating a healthy work ethic 1:01:20: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forrest and Rick sit down with Dr. Susan David, the creator of the concept of Emotional Agility. Emotional agility is what allows us to navigate our complex emotions, make choices aligned with our values, and ultimately lead more authentic and fulfilling lives. They begin by discussing the four parts of emotional agility and distinguishing it from related concepts like emotional intelligence before exploring how we can “unhook” from our painful or problematic thoughts, feelings, and stories. They then explore how we can identify what really matters to us, act from those values, and find our footing in an ever-changing world.  About our Guest: Susan David, Ph.D. is an award-winning Harvard Medical School psychologist and the author of the #1 Bestseller Emotional Agility. She is a frequent contributor to the New York Times, Washington Post, and Wall Street Journal, and her TED Talk on the topic of emotional agility has been seen by more than 10 million people. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:50: Distinguishing emotional agility from emotional intelligence 5:00: The four parts of emotional agility 10:30: The value of seeing yourself and feeling seen by others 16:20: Continuity of self, and considering your future self 21:45: Ways to recognize our unhelpful patterns or ‘hooks’ 26:40: Maintaining context for the full scope of our values 32:55: Defining the concept of values 35:50: Learning from discomfort, boredom, and anxiety 40:30: When you struggle to identify your values in the first place 46:05: Compassion and groundedness amidst constant change 52:40: Accurately labeling your stressors 58:30: Love and wisdom  1:00:00: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The only constant in life is change. Moments come and go, people enter and leave our lives, and we ourselves grow, change, and eventually pass away. While this is an obvious fact of life, we usually let it blend into the background, and coming face-to-face with it can fill us with understandable feelings of anxiety, uncertainty, and even dread. In this episode Forrest and Dr. Rick explore impermanence anxiety: the fears we have related to change. They discuss “macro” and “micro” impermanence, terror management theory, the courage to care, fully embracing life, what tends to help people come to peace with impermanence, and how we can become more resilient in the face of change. Rick closes the episode by explaining how we can come more fully into the present moment, and see reality for what it truly is.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction 1:20: Macro-impermanence and micro-impermanence 9:25: Terror management theory, and grasping the finality of bigger changes 14:50: Fully embracing your reality 26:25: Purpose, meaning, agency and acceptance 32:40: Why change is scary, and recognizing our own fragility 38:10: Repression, avoidance, and sublimation 47:05: A walkthrough of the stages of insight 54:30: Framing yourself in the broader reality, and letting go of painful things 57:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Chris Palmer, assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, joins Forrest to discuss the relationship between metabolic function and mental illness. They discuss Dr. Palmer’s work with patients suffering from severe conditions like schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder, psychiatry’s current challenges with treatment-resistant conditions, and the important distinction between difficult psychological states and brain-based disorders. They then explore the relationship between mental illness and metabolic function, the key role mitochondria play in the process, and how current treatments impact our metabolism. Forrest and Dr. Palmer close the episode by discussing a number of practical interventions to improve metabolic function, including the ketogenic diet, sleep, exercise, stress management techniques like mindfulness practice, and even love, connection, and sense of purpose.  About our Guest: Dr. Chris Palmer is a board-certified psychiatrist and assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. His clinical practice focuses on helping people suffering from treatment-resistant mental illnesses, including mood disorders, psychotic disorders, and personality disorders. His newest book is Brain Energy: A Revolutionary Breakthrough in Understanding Mental Health. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction 1:35: How Dr. Palmer's personal experience has influenced his work 4:00: The brain energy theory as a response to treatment resistant conditions 9:05: Mental states vs. mental disorders, and problems with our diagnostic criteria 14:25: Brain disorders as metabolic disorders 19:50: Defining metabolism 22:40: The role of mitochondria 28:45: How medication affects metabolism 35:20: How stress and emotions affect metabolism 41:40: The ketogenic diet, mitophagy, and mitochondrial biogenesis 47:40: The importance of education and support around ketosis for medical conditions 53:00: Supplementing medication with lifestyle change vs. replacing it 56:20: Sleep and light exposure 59:35: Love, connection, and sense of purpose 1:06:00: A sense of safety as a prerequisite for healing 1:09:10: Recap  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Emotional intelligence is considered an essential trait for everything from being a desirable romantic partner to having a successful career. But what do we really mean when we say “emotional intelligence,” and how can we become emotionally intelligent over time? In today’s episode Dr. Rick and Forrest discuss what’s “in” emotional intelligence, balancing emotional closeness and distance, and how we can become more self-aware, emotionally regulated, and empathic. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction 1:40: What’s emotional intelligence? 4:25: Curiosity, care, and rational vs. emotional decision making 9:30: The five domains of emotional intelligence 11:30: Courage 18:40: Competence, capacity, and application 23:40: Anger, and discerning wants and needs 25:25: Self-awareness 30:20: The stories we are drawn to 33:20: Empathy 44:40: Self-regulation 48:50: Widening the space  51:45: The feelings beneath the feelings 53:00: Feeling overwhelmed, boundaries, and differentiation 1:01:10: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Our thoughts, emotions, and experiences can reshape the very structure of our brains, allowing it to adapt and change over time. This is known as neuroplasticity, and while it’s present throughout our lives the younger we are the more powerful it is.  On today’s episode, Dr. Caroline Leaf joins Rick and Forrest to explore how we can harness the power of neuroplasticity to clean up our mental mess…and teach our children to do the same. They detail Dr. Leaf’s five-step Neurocycle process, walk through a practical example, and explain how we can use mind-management tools to reshape our relationship with difficult thoughts and feelings. Dr. Leaf then shares how we can introduce these tools to young people, the importance of nurturing a child's sense of agency, and the power of teaching through modeling.  About our Guest: Dr. Caroline Leaf is a clinical and cognitive neuroscientist who has been researching the mind-brain connection, the nature of mental health, and the formation of memory for over 40 years. She’s the host of the top mental health podcast Cleaning Up The Mental Mess, and her newest book How to Help Your Child Clean Up Their Mental Mess. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction 1:00: The five steps of Dr. Leaf’s NeuroCycle 6:30: A walkthrough of the process using an example from Rick 13:50: Helping kids have a sense of agency in difficult environments 20:35: Teaching children through modeling, and building connection with different age groups 26:55: What motivates us to take action and reckon with our past 33:20: Empowering kids to have thoughts and feelings without ‘being’ them 35:20: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.  Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Over the last 10 years interest in therapy has boomed, and with the greater demand for therapists more people than ever are considering pursuing a career in mental health. On today’s episode Forrest speaks to five therapists and therapists-in-training to learn the lessons they wish they’d known when they started.  You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Intro 2:15: Rick Hanson 5:05: Key traits of good therapists 17:50: Questions a prospective therapist might not think to ask 25:00: Self-employement, emotional regulation, and boundaries 27:45: Efficacy, complacency, and respecting the craft 31:45: Lori Gottlieb 35:20: Emotional intimacy and human connection 38:50: Modalities  40:50: Vulnerability, uncertainty, and making mistakes 48:10: Terry Real 52:45: Learning how to heal yourself first 55:35: What therapy is actually like 59:30: Messiness 1:03:15: Elizabeth Ferreira 1:06:35: Somatics, and being yourself 1:11:50: How to suffer with someone, then let it move through you 1:16:45: Awareness and the bravery of owning what’s in the room 1:21:15: Chaos, and loving yourself 1:27:45: Taylor Banfield 1:34:00: Sitting with a client for the first time 1:37:45: Choosing a specific career path 1:39:10: Boundaries 1:43:15: Recap About our Guests: Rick Hanson is a psychologist, Senior Fellow at UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center, New York Times best-selling author, and frequent guest on Being Well. Lori Gottlieb is a practicing therapist in Los Angeles, and is the author of the bestseller Maybe You Should Talk to Someone. Terry Real is a longtime clinician, the founder of the Relational Life Institute, and bestselling author of a number of books including Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. Elizabeth Ferreira is an associate somatic psychotherapist working in the San Francisco Bay Area. If you’d like to work with Elizabeth, you can reach out to her through her website or Instagram.  Taylor Banfield is a graduate student in the PsyD program at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, California.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off! Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dan Harris, author of 10% Happier, joins Dr. Rick and Forrest for a wide-ranging, open, and personal conversation. They explore dealing with anxiety and fear, sustaining a mindfulness practice, and accepting our nature while leaning into a new version of ourselves. Along the way they talk about the benefits and drawbacks of purely secular approaches to mindfulness, Dan’s recent time with the Dalai Lama, and why an “anti-sentimentalist” like Dan is writing a book about love. About our Guest: Dan Harris is the author of the best-selling memoir 10% Happier, about a fidgety, skeptical news anchor who finds meditation. He’s also the host of the Ten Percent Happier podcast and the cofounder of the Ten Percent Happier meditation app. For 21 years, he worked at ABC News, where he anchored such shows as Nightline and the weekend editions of Good Morning America. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  ​​0:00: Introduction 1:05: Dan’s history with panic attacks, and using exposure therapy  6:15: Pros and cons of mindfulness in a secular frame 9:15: Moving away from a purely secular frame 12:10: Dan’s current meditation practice 16:15: Sustaining practice, and the pros and cons of stubbornness 20:15: Passion and purpose without attachment 27:50: Dan’s takeaways from the Dalai Lama 30:45: Caring, sharing, and marking your virtuous moments 33:30: An ‘anti-sentimental’ look at love 44:50: Recognizing personal change 47:55: If you can’t be cheesy, you can’t be free 51:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forrest and Dr. Rick open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners. They explore how we can thoughtfully take the input of other people, identify and meet our needs, deal with anxiety and the fear of failure, and approach a conversation about drug use with teenagers. You’ll also learn strategies for reducing nighttime sleep anxiety, creating healthy boundaries, dealing with temperamental differences in a relationship, and finding peace and connection as a single person. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:35: How do process feedback from other people? What helps you accept what's useful...and leave the rest? 11:35: My extended family has gotten very distant. How do families tend to change over time?  23:40: I always feel like I'm about to be punished. What can I do? 33:15: How can we help teens navigate curiosity and peer pressure related to drugs, including psychedelics? 44:15: LIGHTNING ROUND! 45:15: Dealing with anxious thoughts before bedtime. 48:00: Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries. 51:10: My partner has ADHD. How can I encourage them to work on some problematic behaviors while respecting their nature? 56:40: Being at peace with being on our own. 1:00:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: InsideTracker gives you the personalized information you need to optimize your healthspan. Get 20% off by going to my special link: InsideTracker.com/beingwell. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There is a lot of complicated advice out there (including on this podcast) for how to improve our well-being. In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick simplify the lessons they’ve learned from over 100 experts and 300 episodes. They explore the importance of individual context, focusing on what we can change even among difficult circumstances, the power of acceptance, influencing our attention, taking care of the body, social connection, and how we can identify, accept, and manage our unique needs.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.   Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction, and a disclaimer about generalizations 5:50: The belief that things can get better 14:20: How acceptance supports agency 24:55: Being thoughtful about what we consume, and where we place our attention 30:30: Bodily awareness and taking care of the body 36:50: Developing and appreciating strong social connections 41:50: Identifying our wants and needs 44:50: Identifying key values, setting goals, and letting those goals shape our lives 54:30: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Go to healthycell.com/beingwell and use promo code BEINGWELL to get 20% off your first order.  Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick focus on one of the most common, and most important, questions they get about attachment theory: can we heal our attachment wounds, and become more securely attached?  They explore the basics of attachment theory, whether people can change their attachment style, and how much change is truly possible. They then discuss some common frameworks for change, the power of positive experiences, and how we can break out of the “catch-22” of attachment wounds. The episode ends with practical advice for what an anxiously or avoidantly attached person could do to become more securely attached over time.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: An overview of how attachment develops 7:40: Four components involved in changing your attachment style 10:50: The difference between our tendencies and our behavior 12:40: The four stages of growth, and developing “conscious competency” 17:35: Recognizing the ways you’re included, seen, appreciated, liked, and loved 25:00: The role of individual effort, and the real driver of motivation 29:10: What helps anxious people become more securely attached 41:35: And what helps avoidant people 49:55: How to ground ourselves when people are unreliable 55:25: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: InsideTracker gives you the personalized information you need to optimize your healthspan. Get 20% off by going to my special link: InsideTracker.com/beingwell. Go to healthycell.com/beingwell and use promo code BEINGWELL to get 20% off your first order.  Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The average human will live for roughly 4000 weeks. Foregrounding this can be a source of stress, leading us to constantly run from one task to another. Or, it can be a source of meaning and purpose, nudging us to focus on what really matters. In this episode, Forrest is joined by bestselling author Oliver Burkeman for an exploration of what’s really at stake in what we call “time management”. You’ll learn why doing things faster only leaves you with more to do, the hidden payoffs of constant busyness, and how we can live a more fulfilling and enjoyable life by embracing its finite nature.  About our Guest: Oliver Burkeman is a bestselling author and journalist. His most recent book is Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, and prior to that wrote The Guardian column titled, “This Column Will Change Your Life.” He writes and publishes a twice monthly email newsletter called “The Imperfectionist.”  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 0:55: Oliver’s movement towards “anti-productivity” 2:55: Doing fewer things more purposefully 4:55: Looking at your own experience, and the paradoxical notion of perfect efficiency 10:15: The wheel of craving, secondary gains, and grappling with our mortality 15:30: Procrastination and freedom from an ideal result 20:15: The poignancy of limited choice 22:50: Existential crisis, insight, and fulfillment 30:20: Organizing your daily schedule around your top priority 35:55: Frameworks for working within someone else’s schedule 39:45: The allure of middling priorities 41:40: Identifying our wants and needs, and choices that enlarge and diminish us 45:50: Five questions to ask yourself from Oliver’s book 50:00: Suffering from trying to find a solution, and life not being a ‘prologue’ 57:35: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Go to healthycell.com/beingwell and use promo code BEINGWELL to get 20% off your first order.  Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We've all experienced that frustrating feeling of knowing that we should be doing something, and yet struggling to take action. Join Forrest and Dr. Rick as they explore how we can overcome avoidance and procrastination, unlock our motivation, and cultivate a "pursuit mindset."  They discuss intrinsic and extrinsic motivation, why extrinsic motivations aren’t such a bad thing, and how we can use our important values to set better goals and shape our behavior. You’ll learn why procrastination is based on fear, how to orient toward pursuit and see yourself as an agent of change, and the key role “getting good at liking” plays in this process. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:05: Intrinsic vs. external motivation 10:00: Identifying your intrinsic or “noncontingent” motivations 15:00: Self-determination theory (SDT) 19:35: Pursuit and prey orientation 28:25: The psychological function of procrastination 35:35: Learning what you like, and focusing on it 42:25: Meaning, purpose, pleasure, and satisfaction 46:20: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Rick and Forrest are joined by award-winning journalist Michael Krasny for an episode focused on how to stay curious, navigate times of transition, and relate to the modern media landscape in healthy ways. They use Michael’s recent experience with “retirement” as a jumping off point to explore how we can embrace change and stay curious before diving into a conversation focused on the modern media landscape. Topics include bothsides-ism, navigating challenging conversations, and finding the balance between what “knowing mind” and “don’t know mind.” About our Guest: Michael Krasny is the long-time host of the KQED Forum, and has interviewed some of the most prominent figures of the past 50 years, including Maya Angelou, Caesar Chavez, President Jimmy Carter, Carl Sagan, and President Barack Obama. Since retiring from the Forum, Michael has started his own podcast: Grey Matter with Michael Krasny.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: What’s helped Michael navigate the transition to a new phase of life 3:45: Michael’s shift in identity post-KQED Forum 5:45: Curiosity and ‘usefulness’ 8:10: Preparing for interviews 11:10: How Michael became an interviewer 14:10: Shakespeare characters, the anxiety of influence, and corporal punishment 23:10: How the function of media has changed over time 26:05: Bothsidesism and offering balanced viewpoints 30:40: ‘Always don’t know’, and not being captured by our strengths 33:45: Overpreparation, anxiety, and the role of an interviewer 38:20: The value of spacious conversation vs. discourse through sound bytes 40:30: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/   Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you’re tired of feeling stuck, this one’s for you. Dr. Rick and Forrest explore how we can overcome learned helplessness and change our lives by developing self-efficacy: the ability to influence our environments and control our motivation and behavior. Key topics include why we get stuck, the science of learned helplessness, focusing on effort over talent, creating a growth mindset, and balancing acceptance and agency. You’ll learn how to improve self-efficacy, embrace who you are, and become truly confident in your ability to grow.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:50: Why are we prone to feeling stuck? 4:45: Fear of failure and negativity bias 8:30: Learned helplessness and the dog study 18:05: Difficulties identifying patterns we’re close to 20:00: The biological function of shame 22:55 The connection between our emotions, our body, and our sense of self-efficacy 24:10: Chronic illness and pain, and recognizing what is and is not in your control 26:10: What is a growth mindset? 28:40: Nature and nurture, talent and effort, and our metrics of self-worth 35:00: Rick’s practical tips for improving self-efficacy (complete with soundtrack) 40:20: Creating a coherent self-narrative 42:35: An example from Forrest of claiming agency 46:20: Advice for someone in their late 20s when feeling stuck 51:40: Building on and reinforcing our successes 56:35: Determination 59:35: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/   Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forrest and Dr. Rick explore how to overcome imposter syndrome, the common psychological experience of self-doubt and feeling like a fraud. You'll learn why even very accomplished, capable people experience imposter syndrome, strategies to break free from the cycle of self-doubt, and how to move away from comparison, embrace authenticity, and believe in yourself. Topics include how to build self-confidence, reframe negative self-perceptions, and find support from mentors and allies. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:15: Defining imposter syndrome, and watching out for “construct creep” 9:25: Where the notion of imposter syndrome originates 11:30: Stages of development, trust, shame, and belonging 13:50: Myths around accomplishment, and when we’re actually good enough 16:30: The typical cycle of imposter syndrome 20:00: Why people get trapped in this cycle 25:00: Moving away from comparison 28:10: Shame about shame, and sharing authentically with others 32:15: What helps us face our fears 36:35: Acknowledging what you are not 40:15: Your locus of control, and how you interpret your experience 49:25: Mentors, role models, and allies 51:50: Recap Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/   Go to BrioAirPurifier.com and use code BEINGWELL to save $100 on a Brio Air Purifier. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There’s an enormous amount of advice out there in the self-help world…and much of it isn’t very good. Jason Wachob, the Founder and Co-CEO of mindbodygreen, joins Forrest and Dr. Rick to separate fact from fiction and clarify what really matters. They explore the importance of finding joy in the well-being journey, simple practices that have stood the test of time, and how we can pursue goals in healthy ways. Specific topics include the importance of high-quality sleep, breathing better, sifting through diet and exercise fads, developing a pursuit mindset, hormetic stress, and finding the things that work for you. About our Guest: Jason Wachob is the Founder and Co-CEO of mindbodygreen, one of the largest, most influential media brands in the wellness space. He’s also the host of the mindbodygreen podcast, and the co-author of The Joy of Well-Being: A practical guide to a happy, healthy, and long life. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction 1:15: Distinguishing well-being from wellness 3:50: Healthy change is joyful change 7:50: Having a pursuit mindset 11:30: Addressing the main objection to well-being 14:45: Present moment awareness 16:55: Box breathing and sleep 22:10: Jason’s background, and how identity dictates our behavior 32:20: Honoring your inner knowing 37:50: Finding your ‘why’ 42:45: Good stress, and finding what works for you 46:40: Vulnerability with others 48:55: Feeling connected to the world 50:50: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. NEW Offering from Rick! Join Rick and 5 world-renowned teachers – including Dr. Gabor Mate, Tara Brach, and Thupten Jinpa – for The Heart of Compassion, a 5-week online program that will teach you how to access, grow, and apply compassion. Head to rickhanson.net/hoc to learn more, and use code BEINGWELL10 for 10% off.  Sponsors: Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Sue Johnson, the founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), joins Dr. Rick and Forrest to explore how insights from attachment theory can transform our relationships. They discuss how attachment theory provides a map for understanding relationships, the challenges of making skills learned in therapy stick, and the role of vulnerability in creating authentic and fulfilling relationships. In this episode you'll learn how to use insights from attachment theory and EFT to create secure and emotionally healthy relationships.  About our Guest: Dr. Sue Johnson is a clinical psychologist, researcher, professor, and the founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a widely used and respected approach to couples therapy. She is considered one of the foremost experts in the field of attachment, and hKey Topics: Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: Why Sue created Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT) 8:55: Relationships as bonds, not bargains 12:20: Attachment theory as a “map,” and getting skills to stick 16:50: What it feels like to be in a bonding conversation 26:15: Validating vulnerabilities and “finding the raw spot” 31:35: Changing the way you relate to yourself 36:20: EFT vs. Internal Family Systems 38:40: “The Amygdala Whisperer,” and creating a new experience  40:35: Inherent goodness, and naming helplessness 45:40: Communicating how much you value others 51:50: Individualism, and getting comfortable with vulnerability 59:05: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. NEW Offering from Rick! Join Rick and 5 world-renowned teachers – including Dr. Gabor Mate, Tara Brach, and Thupten Jinpa – for The Heart of Compassion, a 5-week online program that will teach you how to access, grow, and apply compassion. Head to rickhanson.net/hoc to learn more, and use code BEINGWELL10 for 10% off.  Sponsors: Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forrest and Dr. Rick dive into the mailbag to answer questions from listeners. They explore age gaps in relationships, relating to people as ongoing processes, and avoiding having your personal growth practice turn you into a doormat. You’ll learn how to develop authentic self-worth, how to allow both “positive” and “negative” motivations to pull you in a good direction, and how to balance determinism with personal responsibility. The episode closes with a question about supporting people trapped in dysfunctional family systems.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:15: Question 1: I feel like my personal growth practice is causing others to take advantage of me. What can I do?  8:55: Question 2: Do age gaps in relationships matter? 19:55: Relating to others as ongoing processes  22:40: Question 3: Given all the things we don’t control, how responsible is anyone for their behavior? 28:30: Thinking in terms of plausible ranges of outcomes 33:20: Question 4: How can I learn to accept myself and improve my self-worth? 41:50: Question 5: I can’t tell if I’m motivated by “good” desires…or just my fear of never measuring up. 49:00: What comes along with challenging experiences 54:15: Question 6: How can an older sibling help a younger sibling in a dysfunctional family system? 1:04:50: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. NEW Offering from Rick! Join Rick and 5 world-renowned teachers – including Dr. Gabor Mate, Tara Brach, and Thupten Jinpa – for The Heart of Compassion, a 5-week online program that will teach you how to access, grow, and apply compassion. Head to rickhanson.net/hoc to learn more, and use code BEINGWELL10 for 10% off.  Sponsors: Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forrest Hanson welcomes Dr. Benjamin Hardy to explore how we can create massive change by applying "10x thinking.” This mindset involves embracing a radically different version of ourselves and our lives, and they share how we can apply it to our daily lives, learn to act from our future selves, and move past defensiveness and fear. You’ll learn how our past and future selves are with us in the present, how fixating on authenticity can hinder our growth, and how to break free from old patterns and create a more fulfilling life. About our Guest: Dr. Benjamin Hardy is an organizational psychologist and author of 8 books, including Personality Isn’t Permanent, Willpower Doesn’t Work, and his newest book 10x is Easier Than 2x: How World-Class Entrepreneurs Achieve More by Doing Less. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:20: Linear vs. 10x thinking and the 80/20 principle 4:30: Having an honesty filter, and making transformational change 6:15: Using the 80/20 principle to act in alignment with your future self 10:45: Agency as the belief in possibility 14:30: The inherent discomfort of orienting to a positive future 17:55: Psychological sunk costs 19:40: How believing in a “core self” holds us back 24:50: What helps us break through defensiveness and fear of failure 29:10: The present shapes the meaning of the past, and why that’s useful 35:10: Developing a coherent narrative and creating space to transform 37:45: Recognizing the cost of not changing, and future awareness creating fulfilment 43:55: The present as simply the present 46:50: “After the Ecstasy, The Laundry”, and 10x thinking being counterintuitive 48:55: Practical steps to engage in a 10x process of thinking 55:50: Recap NEW Offering from Rick! Join Rick and 5 world-renowned teachers – including Dr. Gabor Mate, Tara Brach, and Thupten Jinpa – for The Heart of Compassion, a 5-week online program that will teach you how to access, grow, and apply compassion. Head to rickhanson.net/hoc to learn more, and use code BEINGWELL10 for 10% off.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Buddhist teacher Mark Coleman joins Forrest and Dr. Rick to share how we can learn from nature and incorporate it into our practice. Mark shares his insights and experiences from years of leading wilderness retreats, and explains how reconnecting with the natural world can deepen mindfulness and enhance our well-being. You’ll learn specific meditative practices, how to bring the outside inside, the power of our “wild” aspects, and how we can move from being in nature to simply being nature. About our Guest: Mark Coleman is a senior meditation teacher at Spirit Rock Meditation Center in northern California, and the founder of Awake in the Wild, an organization that runs programs focused on immersing people in the natural world. He’s also the author of four books, including From Suffering to Peace: The True Promise of Mindfulness and his newest book A Field Guide to Nature Meditation: 52 Mindfulness Practices for Joy, Wisdom and Wonder. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:40: What drew Mark to practice in nature 5:15: Being drawn outward by meditation 9:20: Access to nature, and “bougie-fication” 15:15: Novelty, acclimation, and quieting the “self” 20:25: The brutal side of nature, and uncertainty 25:05: Reciprocity and relationship 28:05: From appreciating nature to being nature 30:15: Searching for a place vs. searching for a feeling 35:50: What meditating in nature looks like in practice 41:40: Bringing the benefits of practice to the mundane 45:05: “A bunch of tame monkeys” 49:15: Recap NEW Offering from Rick! Join Rick and 5 world-renowned teachers – including Dr. Gabor Mate, Tara Brach, and Thupten Jinpa – for The Heart of Compassion, a 5-week online program that will teach you how to access, grow, and apply compassion. Head to rickhanson.net/hoc to learn more, and use code BEINGWELL10 for 10% off.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forrest and Dr. Rick delve into a frequently requested topic: how we can let go of obsessive and intrusive thoughts. They explore why we get trapped in certain thoughts, the negative effects of rumination, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). They also discuss facing our fears, which allows us to get close enough to a problem that we can do something about it…without getting so close that we become overwhelmed by it.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:20: What is rumination? 5:00: Why we get stuck in certain thoughts 8:10: Two kinds of obsessive thoughts 11:00: The brains attempt to problem solve 13:40: Assessing a hypothetical client 20:15: We all have weird thoughts 22:35: Reality testing, naming thoughts and not feeding them 25:20: "Completing the gestalt" 31:40: Rick completing a gestalt on psychedelics 33:45: Balancing closeness and distance 39:45: Exaggerating the obsession vs. thought suppression 42:35: Widening your view and surrendering to the worst 44:50: The intrinsic emptiness of a ruminative thought 48:10: Another hypothetical case study 56:10: Doing good in the world as an antidote 59:30: Recap NEW Offering from Rick! Join Rick and 5 world-renowned teachers – including Dr. Gabor Mate, Tara Brach, and Thupten Jinpa – for The Heart of Compassion, a 5-week online program that will teach you how to access, grow, and apply compassion. Head to rickhanson.net/hoc to learn more, and use code BEINGWELL10 for 10% off.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cognitive bypassing occurs when we overthink to avoid feeling uncomfortable emotions like sadness, fear, or anger. In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick share their personal experiences with cognitive bypassing, and explore how we can step out of our heads, get in touch with our emotions, and live a more fulfilling life. You'll learn why people can't just "feel their feelings," the function of cognitive bypassing, how we can use cognition to create space for our emotions, and practical tools for connecting with the non-cognitive aspects of our experience. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: What is cognitive bypassing? 3:05: How cognitive bypassing comes up in therapy 6:10: The function of cognitive bypassing 11:10: Does insight lead to action? 18:45: “Feel your feelings” vs. self-actualizing 24:50: Leveraging your cognition to create space from your feelings 30:00: Body sensations and self-compassion 33:15: Relating to others 38:55: Practical steps to being in touch with yourself 42:20: Intensity, valence, and opening to empathy 45:15: Rigidity and resistance 50:00: The range of possibilities within your constraints 56:35: Recap NEW Offering from Rick! Join Rick and 5 world-renowned teachers – including Dr. Gabor Mate, Tara Brach, and Thupten Jinpa – for The Heart of Compassion, a 5-week online program that will teach you how to access, grow, and apply compassion. Head to rickhanson.net/hoc to learn more, and use code BEINGWELL10 for 10% off.  Sponsors: Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

ADHD is often misunderstood as a simple "lack of attention." But in this episode of Being Well, Forrest and Dr. Rick are joined by ADHD pioneer Dr. John Ratey to explore the true nature of this complex condition. They debunk common misconceptions, explore how ADHD works in the brain, and discuss its surprising strengths and vulnerabilities. You’ll learn how to thrive with ADHD by applying effective interventions, including social connection, mindfulness practice, medication, and exercise. About our Guest: Dr. John Ratey is associate clinical professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and the author of eleven books including Spark and the Driven to Distraction series with Dr. Ned Hallowell. Their newest book in the series is the fantastic ADHD 2.0 Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: Some of the biggest misconceptions about ADHD 3:35: The advantages of having ADHD 5:55: De-pathologizing, skillful means, and the problem of “fit” 9:25: The variety of presentations 12:10: A trait, not a disorder 13:55: The task-positive network, and the default mode network 18:20: Three ways to turn off the default mode network 22:20: The importance of social connection 25:35: Feeling like an outsider, and being punished for having ADHD 28:45: Deliberate internalization of beneficial experiences 31:40: Why exercise and movement is particularly useful for ADHD 34:45: Dance as an ideal form of exercise 39:50: Jump rope, and right amount of exercise 41:15: Nature and the afflictions of civilization 44:25: Medication 51:15: Recap Rumination Workshop from Rick! Join Rick on April 22nd for a 1-day, live online workshop where you'll learn how to identify rumination when it comes up and get out of negative cycles in your head compassionately and effectively. Use coupon code BeingWell20 for 20% off! Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Join Forrest and Dr. Rick, two “reformed rigid people,” as they explore how to become more psychologically flexible. Just as physical flexibility is the amount of stretch in our muscles, the ability they have to bend without breaking, psychological flexibility is the same quality in our minds. It enables us to approach situations from new perspectives, be open to our emotions, let go of old versions of ourselves, and step into new ways of being. In this episode, they discuss the concept of rigidity as a form of psychological defense and explore the motivations behind it. They also delve into the trap of assumptions and limiting beliefs, the importance of releasing attachments, and the benefits of embracing new ways of thinking. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:35: Choice, and the tradeoff between flexibility and speed 2:55: Rigidity, agency, and flexibility in relationship 7:50: Behavioral vs. psychological choices 10:30: The dock and the river, and self-protection 15:40: Inflexibility as a means to an end 17:30 Tools to inquire into your rigidities 20:50: When others’ behavior isn’t about you 23:20: Assumptions and limiting beliefs 27:35: Willingness to change, and comfort in feeling change 34:10: Releasing attachment to your ‘place’ 39:50: Understanding the function of your rigidity 41:35: Over-identification with goals and accomplishments 44:40: Stepping into the river 45:20: Recap Rumination Workshop from Rick! Join Rick on April 22nd for a 1-day, live online workshop where you'll learn how to identify rumination when it comes up and get out of negative cycles in your head compassionately and effectively. Use coupon code BeingWell20 for 20% off! Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors:  This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Author Stephanie Foo joins Forrest to share her journey with Complex PTSD. They talk about what it was like to receive a diagnosis, the various techniques and modalities she used (and what really helped), the importance of social support, self-acceptance and self-compassion, difficulties with access and cultural competence in the mental healthcare system, intergenerational trauma, and motherhood.  About Our Guest: Stephanie is a writer and radio producer whose work has been featured on This American Life, 99% Invisible, and Radiolab among other shows, and she’s the author of the truly wonderful book What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing From Complex Trauma. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.   Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction and disclaimer 2:10: Stephanie’s experience in sharing her story 6:00: Features of CPTSD 7:50: What led Stephanie to seek help, and work as a coping mechanism 10:15: “The Dread” and healing through relationship 17:40: The effects of receiving diagnosis, and aspects of CPTSD that are helpful 25:45: Practices that helped Stephanie and incorporating them practically 33:45: Balancing showing up for other people and receiving care 35:15: Self-love, gratitude, psychedelics, and relationships 38:20: Two way repair and comfort receiving feedback 42:55: The need for reform to our mental healthcare system and who it serves 49:55: Societal trauma among first generation immigrants 53:30: More natural and communal frameworks for healing 54:30: Parenthood 57:00: Resources available on Stephanie’s website 58:15: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Most of what's occurring in the mind lies outside our awareness. In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick Hanson explore the unconscious mind and the material we might find there. They talk about what the unconscious mind is, the purpose of the unconscious, repression, bias, and what we can do to access, use, and release that unconscious material.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:25: What is the unconscious mind? 5:35: Why material gets moved to our unconscious mind 8:45: Freud, Jung, and repression 14:25: Looking at repression through a developmental model 18:55: Bias, relational ‘scripts’, and what we can do about unconscious patterns 21:45: Interpreting dreams, and the limits of science 27:55: Examples of repressed material and how to uncover it 30:05: Rick’s first love story 34:20: Emotional release work you can do without a therapist 38:00: Distress tolerance 42:10: The body-based, non-cognitive nature of unconscious material 44:10: Sentence completions, automatic writing, and sand trays 47:00: Building self-worth, and creating a safe container 54:50: Teaching what you need to learn, and the importance of support 57:30: Including what’s left out 1:00:00: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. New Program From Rick! If you want to break old patterns and step out of the familiar scripts that hold you back, Rick's Change Your Mind online course is for you. It's a 6-week program starting March 18 designed to help you step out of old assumptions and attitudes and into new, helpful thoughts about yourself and others. Visit RickHanson.net/ChangeYourMind to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On the (roughly) 300th episode of Being Well, Forrest and Dr. Rick share what they’ve learned from the many experts in psychology, personal growth, and mental health they’ve talked to on the show. They explore the importance of individual context, the gap between insight and action, self-honesty and acceptance as the catalyst for change, incremental change vs. sudden breakthroughs, and the role of distress tolerance. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction and two big themes 2:25: Applying generalized information to your individual context 7:50: The importance of insight and where it falls short 9:20: White light moments and the importance of action 13:25: Wants and needs 25:40: Slow and steady effort 29:35: Going to zero and the scaffolding that leads to sustained change 36:15: Distress tolerance, valuing acceptance, and what you know to be true 41:25: The three mechanisms of change 44:25: Reducing inner friction through mental training, and cultivating trust 47:50: How do you want to use your time? 49:10: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. New Program From Rick! If you want to break old patterns and step out of the familiar scripts that hold you back, Rick's Change Your Mind online course is for you. It's a 6-week program starting March 18 designed to help you step out of old assumptions and attitudes and into new, helpful thoughts about yourself and others. Visit RickHanson.net/ChangeYourMind to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Sponsors:  This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Somatic therapist Elizabeth Ferreira returns to the podcast and joins Forrest for a deep dive into somatic psychology. They explore what a somatic therapy session looks like in practice, how it differs from traditional talk therapy, the connection between the body and the mind, and why people with complex trauma are sometimes better served by body-based approaches. Elizabeth then talks about how somatic therapy has supported her own journey with CPTSD and PMDD, and shares some of the practices that have helped her clients. About our Guest: Elizabeth Ferreira is an associate therapist working in the San Francisco Bay Area. Her practice is open, and if you’d like to reach out to Elizabeth you can do so through Instagram. Elizabeth also has her own podcast, My Therapist's a Witch. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: What happens in a somatic therapy session? 5:00: Attunement and a quick demonstration 9:55: Moving slowly and navigating dissociative patterns 12:45: Cognitive bypassing and catharsis in letting go 15:40: Trauma and integrating alienated parts of ourselves 21:15: Elizabeth’s experience feeling anger 25:30: When the thing that brings you into therapy isn’t the root of your problem 29:00: Safety allowing comfort with feeling difficult feelings 31:40: Interoception, physical embodiment, and more on attunement 35:50: Clean and dirty pain, different parts, and appreciation 40:25: Resistance, joining with the defense, and compassion 44:50: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. New Program From Rick! If you want to break old patterns and step out of the familiar scripts that hold you back, Rick's Change Your Mind online course is for you. It's a 6-week program starting March 18 designed to help you step out of old assumptions and attitudes and into new, helpful thoughts about yourself and others. Visit RickHanson.net/ChangeYourMind to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you listen to a podcast like ours, you’re probably familiar with the phrase “daddy issues.” A more accurate way to understand daddy issues is as a form of attachment wounding, which describes situations where our adult relationships are affected by complicated, difficult, or traumatic experiences we had as a child.  In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick explore what daddy issues are, how they relate to attachment theory, sexism and the broader social and historical context, different forms of attachment wounding, and a simple way to understand your attachment style. They then walk through four common sets of symptoms and challenges related to attachment wounding, and what a person can do to move toward secure attachment. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:50: What are daddy issues? 6:35: Parental roles and symptoms of attachment wounding  13:35: How attachment patterns are created 19:35: Yearning for narcissistic supplies 22:10: Gendered dynamics, and the pejorative use of the phrase “daddy issues” 28:20: Claiming your power 31:15: Forming a coherent narrative, and looking for what was missing 34:50: A simple method for assessing your attachment style 41:50: Social support 44:10: Who you are to others, and meeting person to person 50:55: Situation #1: How to deal with fears of abandonment and being alone 55:00: Situation #2: “I need a lot of reassurance and external validation.” 58:10: Situation #3: Fears related to emotional vulnerability 1:05:15: Situation #4: “I keep dating the same (problematic) kind of person.” 1:10:30: Making deliberate effort 1:14:50: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. New Program From Rick! If you want to break old patterns and step out of the familiar scripts that hold you back, Rick's Change Your Mind online course is for you. It's a 6-week program starting March 18 designed to help you step out of old assumptions and attitudes and into new, helpful thoughts about yourself and others. Visit RickHanson.net/ChangeYourMind to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Eric Zimmer, a behavior coach and the host of The One You Feed podcast, joins Forrest and Rick to explore what really supports us in changing our ingrained patterns of behavior through the lens of Eric’s journey with addiction and recovery. They share the key lessons from speaking with hundreds of experts, the role of insight, why some people go from insight to action and others don’t, acceptance, shame, and responsibility, and the balance between determinism and agency. About our Guest: Eric is a behavior coach, interfaith spiritual director, and host of The One You Feed, which has over 500 episodes and 25 million downloads. At 24, Eric was homeless and addicted to heroin. In the years since he’s been in recovery, built a meaningful and fulfilling life for himself, and has used the lessons from his own life to help others do the same. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:25: The parable of the two wolves 7:45: Applying our values to our own mental processes 13:00: Change as a three part process: insight, acceptance, and action 14:50: Why some people have an easier time changing than others 19:30: Continuous feedback, quick iterations, and where you rest your mind 23:00: Do we all have the same level of choice? 26:40: Shame, and differing interventions for differing levels of agency 32:40: Feeding the good wolf 40:35: How to want what’s good for us 47:10: Acceptance, responsibility, and beginner’s mind 50:10: What’s missing from the abstinence model? 52:20: Innate goodness, bumping into enlightenment, and self-compassion 1:01:50: “Devote yourself to what remains” 1:03:55: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners related to how we can build better relationships (particularly with our families) and deal with difficult people. They explore the common traits of happy families, how to deal with people who weaponize psychological jargon, navigating different perceptions of “what happened,” and repairing a damaged relationship with a child. Forrest ends the conversation by talking about the importance of “going to zero” after a breach of trust. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:00: Question 1: Common characteristics of happy families 8:25: Differentiation and integration 10:55: Symptoms of a less healthy family system 12:15: The role of love  19:55: Question 2: What to do when people use psychological jargon during a conflict 26:00: Defending yourself effectively, and staying on topic 30:50: Question 3: Navigating different perceptions of a difficult event 35:45: Question 4: Healing a strained relationship with a child (or parent) 39:45: Functional repair before emotional vulnerability 46:45: “Going to zero” with behavior when repair is needed 56:10: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.   Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All of our relationships include some conflict, the big question is how skillfully we handle that conflict when it appears. Dr. Rick Hanson joins Forrest to walk us through some effective ways to deal with common forms of interpersonal conflict. They explore the four common disagreements, the subtle ways power shows up in our relationships, separating content from process, and how to stand your ground. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction and Rick’s new book 1:25: Common conflicts Rick has seen in couples counseling 3:40: The importance of the way something is said 8:10: Disentangling tone from content 9:45: Distinguishing intent from impact 12:10: The unconscious functions of conflict 17:50: Navigating differences in temperament, and cultivating enthusiasm 25:05: Power tripping, control, and misinterpretation 29:50: Primate politics, escalation, and identifying what’s really happening 35:45: Trust 39:15: How much are we willing to tolerate? 41:10: Dealing with entitlement, and when to push back 43:40: Peoples’ capacity to change, balancing harmony and truth 46:10: Focus on communicating for yourself 49:05: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The main topic we explore on the podcast, in many different ways, is change. How can we come to understand ourselves better, let go of who we were, and become who we wish to be? In this episode Dr. Rick and Forrest are joined by meditation teacher and former Zen monastic Caverly Morgan. They discuss how we can release our conditioning, identify the inner voice that leads to change, and get to the heart of who we are. About Our Guest: Caverly is a meditation teacher, author, and the founder of Peace in Schools - a nonprofit which created the nation's first for-credit mindfulness class in public high schools. Her practice began in 1995, and has included eight years of training in a silent Zen monastery. She’s also the author of the wonderful new book The Heart of Who We Are: Realizing Freedom Together. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: Caverly’s path to Zen 3:30: Truth and freedom 7:20: Chop wood, carry water 8:30: Why it’s okay to have a “conventional” path to enlightenment 9:35: The voice that says “is this all there is?” 12:25: Distinguishing our conditioning from what we really want 15:40: What supports us in exercising our will 21:20: Resistance, preference, and willingness 23:25: Responding to “should” 29:10: Our will and our ego 35:30: Making room for our own nurturing voice 37:35: Practical ways to listen to the heart 40:40: Awakening together 47:20: Coming home to our own being at the simplest level 50:30: Recap New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices