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Rick Hanson, Ph.D., Forrest Hanson
Forrest Hanson is joined by clinical psychologist Dr. Rick Hanson and a world-class group of experts to explore the practical science of lasting well-being. Conversations focus on the key insights from psychology, science, and contemplative practice that you need to build reliable inner strengths, overcome your challenges, and get the most out of life. New episodes every Monday.
Now What? What to Do When Things Fall Apart
Life has a way of throwing unexpected curveballs: a sudden job loss, a relationship ending, a health crisis, or losing faith in something. These moments can leave us feeling overwhelmed, lost, and unsure of how to move forward. In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick explore a practical framework for navigating life's most challenging transitions. They break down the essential steps for finding your footing when things fall apart: managing the initial emotional impact, steadying yourself, gathering information, working with loss, and taking meaningful action.
You'll learn how to process difficult emotions without getting stuck, ways to evaluate your situation objectively while avoiding common cognitive biases, strategies for decision making under stress, and approaches to building resilience and finding meaning in challenging experiences.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
4:55: Four steps to find your footing when things fall apart
7:05: Stabilizing your body, and reestablishing routines
14:45: Slowing down, and confirmation bias
17:30: Emotional first aid, limiting stressors, and rumination
29:45: Identifying what is reliable in your life
32:45: Facing reality, and gathering information
40:00: Processing loss and disappointment
48:00: Making a plan and taking action
52:30: Post-traumatic growth
58:10: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
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Follow Forrest on Instagram
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01:11:5125/11/2024
How to Make Good Choices: A System for Decision Making
We all have to make big choices in life, but it’s easy to feel overwhelmed when facing major decisions about careers, relationships, or personal growth. In this episode, Forrest and Rick Hanson explore how to develop a reliable system for making choices that align with your values and goals. They break down balancing analysis with intuition, the five key decision-making styles, and common obstacles that lead to poor choices. The episode also includes two live demonstrations of working through a big decision, which includes learning how to identify what you want and pursue it from a values-oriented perspective.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
3:50: Analysis vs. intuition, and activities vs. results
10:45: Effort, values, and the environments you put yourself in
17:05: The five decision-making styles
28:50: Motives and attachment
33:30: Rigidity, excessive certainty, and other common pitfalls
42:10: Demo #1 - Reverse-engineering a career decision (or Rick with a legal pad)
1:04:55: Demo #2 - Deciding whether to invest deeply in a romantic relationship
1:18:00: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:31:4118/11/2024
Healthy Productivity with Cal Newport
We’re tired, burnt out, and searching for a reprieve from hustle culture. Something needs to change if we’re going to get to real productivity: doing that is meaningful and fulfilling rather than just checking boxes off an endless to-do list. On today’s episode, Cal Newport joins the podcast to explore slow productivity, deep work, and how we can achieve more by doing less.
About our Guest: Cal is a computer science professor at Georgetown University and the bestselling author of eight books including Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World and most recently, Slow Productivity: The Lost Art of Accomplishment Without Burnout. He also has a YouTube channel and hosts the podcast Deep Questions with Cal Newport.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:45: Slow productivity vs. pseudoproductivity
10:35: Anxiety, procrastination, and overwhelm
17:40: Meaningful work and anti-productivity
22:40: Technology, anti-capitalist philosophy, and knowledge work
28:55: The cognitive drain of multitasking
32:45: The distraction of phones social media
36:00: The ratio of deep work to lighter work
41:00: How timeblocking actually reduces stress
45:20: Office hours and shared documents
48:05: Common misconceptions about Cal’s work
55:45: Tailoring advice to your individual situation
1:00:40: Life transitions, and the deceptive advice to “follow your passion”
1:08:00: Obsessing over quality while avoiding perfectionism
1:17:30: Recap
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:31:3411/11/2024
Attachment, Boundaries, and Finding Yourself: Relationship Mailbag
Dr. Rick and Forrest answer listener questions focused on navigating relationship challenges. They explore how to rediscover yourself after a codependent relationship, distinguish between healthy and unhealthy desires, maintain friendships after romantic feelings emerge, overcome self-consciousness in social interactions, and communicate effectively during stress responses. Whether you're healing from a breakup, working through attachment issues, or seeking to build more authentic connections, this episode offers practical advice.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
0:50: After a breakup, how can I reconnect with myself and identify what I really want?
7:50: How do I distinguish between healthy and unhealthy wanting?
18:40: How can I stay friends with someone I’ve had romantic feelings for?
32:20: How can I learn to let my thoughts and speech flow more naturally?
39:10: How can I communicate with care when I find myself in an attachment-related freeze response?
56:15: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:09:2404/11/2024
Healing Your Inner Child
We all have an "inner child:” the part of ourselves that carries the emotions, beliefs and experiences from our early years. While this aspect of ourselves can be a source of creativity, playfulness and wonder, it might also harbor unresolved wounds that affect our adult relationships and behaviors. In this episode, Dr. Hanson and Forrest explore what the inner child really is, how it manifests in our lives, and practical ways to work with this important part of ourselves. They discuss how to identify inner child wounds, demonstrate techniques like voice dialogue, and share strategies for bringing more awareness and healing to our younger selves.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:20: What is the inner child?
7:30: How the inner child shows up in our adult lives
10:40: A CBT-ish way of thinking about the inner child
16:40: Unmet needs, and examples of inner child wounds
21:45: Promoting the positive aspects of the inner child
28:50: How to begin engaging with the inner child
35:30: Shame, and turning toward yourself
39:00: Reparenting
46:30: Voice Dialogue demonstration
1:00:15: Reflections on the demonstration
1:06:00: Other approaches, and reasons you might be having a hard time
1:09:25: Rage and release, looking at pictures, and creating an autobiography
1:14:00: Balancing the inner child's desires with the realities of life
1:20:10: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:34:1428/10/2024
The Anxiety Toolkit: How to Tolerate Uncertainty with Joshua Fletcher
Anxiety is something we all experience from time to time, and because it’s so common it can be easy to take it lightly. But anxiety dominates the lives of many people, and in this episode psychotherapist Joshua Fletcher joins Forrest for an in-depth exploration of anxiety. They talk about the anxiety cycle, moving away from thinking in terms of a “cure,” and the key target of the “willful tolerance of uncertainty.” Josh also shares insights on exposure therapy, managing self-criticism, and developing greater self-awareness.
About our Guest: Joshua Fletcher, also known as Anxiety Josh, is a psychotherapist based in Manchester, UK, and the author of several books, including his newest, "and how does that make you feel?" Joshua also co-hosts the podcast "Disordered," and you may have bumped into his content on Tiktok or Instagram, where he has over a quarter million followers.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
3:30: Josh’s first panic attack
10:15: The vicious cycle of threat monitoring
14:00: The three magic words: “just in case”
20:00: The “willful tolerance of uncertainty”
27:00: Exposure therapy
31:55: Working with self-criticism
41:20: Reward, punishment, and trauma
48:05: Identifying our varied inner voices
52:10: Worried voice, false comfort, and wise mind
54:00: Approaching anxiety as a neurodivergent person
58:10: Healthy disenchantment
1:00:15: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:11:4721/10/2024
Self-Compassion: How to Make it Work For You with Dr. Chris Germer
Why do so many people seem to resist self-compassion? Dr. Chris Germer, co-creator of the Mindful Self-Compassion program, joins Forrest to explore how we can work with the deeply ingrained shame that gets in the way.
Dr. Germer shares common misunderstandings about self-compassion, and they discuss the complex interplay between shame, self-criticism, and our capacity for self-care. Forrest focuses on the paradox of self-compassion: how approaching it as a “solution to your problems” actually gets in the way of it helping you out. Dr. Germer then shares the model of safety, challenge, and overwhelm, including how we can use it to guide our practice, get to the bottom of shame, and avoid burnout along the way.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:30: What people get wrong about self-compassion
5:10: Tender vs. fierce self-compassion, and the “paradox of practice”
11:35: Shame and self-compassion
17:35: Safety, challenge, and overwhelm
23:30: Holding ourselves before holding our experience
31:45: Burnout, and inner-kindness vs. external approval
37:35: Getting to the bottom of shame, and loving ourselves up
42:00: Applying mindfulness to self-compassion practice
48:40: Overzealousness, and clarity of intention
53:10: Motivating ourselves
57:00: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:10:0614/10/2024
Understanding and Overcoming Social Anxiety: Attachment, Exposure, and Confidence
In this episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest explore the all-too-common challenge of social anxiety. They break down what it really means to be socially anxious (hint: it's not just being shy), where those feelings come from, and why they stick around. Rick explains the roots of social anxiety, highlighting the role of attachment styles and individual temperament, before Forrest shares how to locate yourself on a spectrum from everyday nervousness to Social Anxiety Disorder. They then discuss evidence-based approaches to working with social anxiety like exposure therapy, cognitive defusion, and mindfulness techniques. Whether you experience feelings of anxiety or are trying to understand a friend who does, this episode will help you feel more confident and connected.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:45: What is social anxiety?
7:10: Where does social anxiety come from?
13:40: Feeling worthy, and other social factors
17:00: Nature vs. nurture
24:15: Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) and comorbid diagnoses
29:50: Exposure therapy, and how to practice it safely
42:00: Positive reinforcement, and responding to ruminative thoughts
55:45: Widening our view, and taking in the good
1:03:15: Talking with younger parts, and self-compassion
1:10:15: Normalizing anxiety
1:11:35: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:26:1507/10/2024
Feed Drop: Exploring the Benefits of Peer-Based and Family Therapy - Turning Points Podcast
In our first feed drop, we’re sharing the first episode of Season 4 of the Turning Points Podcast. The host of Turning Points is therapist Frantzces Lys, and in this episode she explores family and peer-based approaches to therapy.
Frantzces is joined by two guests, first Charles Daniels, the CEO and co-founder of Fathers’ Uplift, an organization that provides therapy, coaching, and advocacy for fathers. And second, Gina Connor, a clinical social worker who specializes treating eating disorders, trauma, anxiety, and life transitions through individual and group therapy.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
5:00: First guest - Charles Daniels
23:10: Second guest - Gina Connor
33:30: Recap
I hope you enjoy this episode of the Turning Points podcast. Subscribe here: https://sponsored.bostonglobe.com/point32health/turning-points/
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
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36:2202/10/2024
The Dark Triad: Dealing with Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People
Dr. Rick and Forrest unpack the "Dark Triad" of personality traits - narcissism, Machiavellianism, and sociopathy - and explore how these traits can manifest in everyday relationships. They talk about how individuals with these tendencies use charm and manipulation to control situations and people, and offer practical strategies for identifying these traits in others. You’ll learn how to set boundaries, protect yourself from manipulation, and develop a thoughtful, empathetic approach when navigating relationships with those who exhibit these challenging behaviors. The episode also explores self-care in difficult dynamics, the ethical considerations in labeling others, and how to manage unavoidable interactions with people who display these traits. It’s essential listening for anyone who has encountered toxic behavior, and wants to learn how to deal with it more effectively.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction and disclaimers
3:50: The Dark Triad: Narcissism, Machiavellianism, and Sociopathy
7:40: Charisma, privilege, and why some people get away with antisocial behavior
16:10: Sensitivity to criticism, viewing people as means to ends, and other evidence
22:35: Being careful about labeling people
28:50: Developing awareness, and grieving reality
33:10: Boundaries and safety
38:00: Limiting the scope of the relationship
42:20: How to break through the “fuzz” in communication
49:25: Transference, and when it’s safe to confront people
55:15: Self-care in unavoidable situations
59:15: When you notice these tendencies in yourself
1:02:10: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:15:1730/09/2024
How to Build a Securely Attached Relationship with Julie Menanno
Forrest sits down with marriage and family therapist Julie Menanno to explore one of the most crucial aspects of healthy relationships: secure attachment. They discuss the impact of anxious, avoidant, and secure attachment patterns, and provide practical advice on identifying and communicating attachment needs, fostering emotional safety, and addressing the common anxious-avoidant partner dynamic. Julie highlights the importance of emotional validation and recommends strategies for communicating from the heart. Forrest and Julie then talk about what we can learn from how securely attached couples navigate conflict and repair.
This episode is perfect for anyone looking to strengthen their relationships!
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:20: Attachment styles and emotional safety
4:30: Identifying and meeting attachment needs
12:45: How attachment styles shape our relationships
19:30: The “anxious-avoidant” partner dynamic
26:55: Communicating from the heart
32:40: Emotional validation
35:55: Conflict and repair in a securely attached relationship
44:55: How a therapist manages escalation and overwhelm
50:35: The power of choice in relationships
56:35: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:09:1623/09/2024
Social Anxiety, Self-Advocacy, and Too Much Self-Help: September Mailbag
Dr. Rick and Forrest dive into the mailbag, and answer questions from listeners focused on working with anxiety in ourselves and our relationships. They start with a question that’s essential to the podcast as a whole: is it possible to be too preoccupied with personal growth? Rick talks about how to manage the desire for approval, offering strategies to foster self-acceptance and healthier self-validation, before Forrest shares his own journey with finding the right amount of try-hard. They then discuss how to create more collaborative decisions in relationships. Additional topics include self-motivation and peak performance, working with diverse needs, and diagnostic “scope creep.”
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:05: Am I too preoccupied with self-help and personal growth?
11:20: How do I address my unquenchable thirst for approval?
27:15: How can I tell if I’m actually doing my best?
36:40: How do I advocate for more collaborative decision making with my partner?
54:15: How does the brain’s natural pursuit of novelty balance with its desire for safety?
1:03:30: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:13:4416/09/2024
Cognitive Bypassing, Traumatic Experiences, and Managing Triggers with Simone Saunders
Forrest dives into cognitive bypassing - a common strategy many of us use to avoid feeling difficult emotions - with trauma therapist Simone Saunders. Simone and Forrest discuss the connection between cognitive bypassing and trauma before exploring somatic tools that can help us avoid an endless cycle of overthinking, and fully process our experiences. They focus on the “freeze” and “fawn” stress responses, and talk about how these responses can impact our relationships and everyday interactions. The conversation widens from there to include topics like letting go of unhealthy relationships, navigating the shame that can come with self-awareness, working through triggers, finding more agency, and changing our models of conflict.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:25: What’s cognitive bypassing?
5:55: Somatic approaches, and widening the window of tolerance
18:10: The freeze and fawn responses
22:25: Grieving letting go of unhealthy relationships
26:20: Shame, the problem with self-awareness, and identifying your values
35:35: How to move through “first contact” with our triggers
38:05: Feeling connected to others
41:55: Agency, and being embodied in a relationship
47:30: Changing how we see conflict
51:15: Grief as self-awareness, and expressing ourselves
57:25: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:06:4709/09/2024
Navigating Parenthood: What Every Dad Needs to Know
In this special conversation, Forrest explores what it means to be a good father with his dad, clinical psychologist Dr. Rick Hanson. They discuss the joys, challenges, and unexpected lessons of parenthood, starting with the advice Rick would have given himself. Rick and Forrest tackle the mental health challenges new parents face, focusing particularly on maintaining a strong relationship between partners. They get real about their relationship, and Rick offers practical strategies for "resetting" with your partner during stressful times.
They then talk about different approaches to parenting, and how to find a healthy balance of authority, aspiration, and nurturance. Whether you’re navigating the path of parenthood, reflecting on your relationship with your own parents, or just looking to gain some insight into the father-son dynamic, this episode has something for everyone.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:00: Did becoming a dad change Rick’s relationship with his parents?
5:05: What advice would Rick give a younger version of himself?
8:45: Biological stressors, and the mental health challenges of young parents
17:00: Maintaining closeness with your children while working
21:40: How to “reset” with your partner
32:15: Savoring the good times
35:35: Authority, aspiration, and nurturance
44:30: Parenting the child you have, and emotional regulation
51:10: Recognizing that kids are not tiny adults
57:55: Staying consistent
1:00:30: How to practice for becoming a parent
1:03:00: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
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01:17:5002/09/2024
How to Live in an Anxious World: Uncertainty, Agency, and Resilience
In this timely episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest tackle the anxiety and uncertainty so many are feeling about the state of today’s world. They discuss why everything feels so overwhelming right now, share practical ways to manage those emotions, and explore how we can stay grounded, take ownership of what we can control, and maintain a sense of connection with others. Topics include managing uncertainty, wise skepticism, developing agency, accepting impermanence, and understanding grief as a deep form of love and connection. Whether you're feeling anxious about global events or just navigating daily life, this episode offers practical advice for building resilience.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:55: Why do things feel so terrifying?
11:45: A typical response to the state of the world
17:40: Recognizing how much uncertainty there is
25:35: Feeling grounded in your personal integrity
32:30: Taking ownership of what you are able to contribute
39:00: Our felt sense of connection with others
44:20: Accepting impermanence
49:00: Grief as a form of love and connection
54:15: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:06:4526/08/2024
Embracing Perfectionism with Katherine Morgan Schafler
Forrest explores how we can harness perfectionism’s strengths without getting captured by its vulnerabilities with therapist and author Katherine Morgan Schafler. They talk about perfectionism’s bad branding, and how our relationship with perfectionism can lead to it being either a superpower or a stumbling block. They discuss the different types of perfectionists, the limitations of defining perfectionism merely as a defense against criticism, and the importance of shifting our language around self-criticism. You’ll learn about the difference between power and control, why self-compassion beats self-punishment, and how to keep perfectionism in check while still reaching your goals.
About our Guest: Katherine is a psychotherapist, former on-site therapist at Google, and author of the recent book The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control: A Path to Peace and Power.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:35: Defining perfectionism
6:00: Ideals, identity, and asking yourself how and why you’re striving
12:40: The five types of perfectionists
21:55: Why defining perfectionism as a ‘defense against criticism’ falls short
28:20: Changing our vocabulary around self-criticism
34:00: Why self-punishment doesn’t work
38:10: The difference between power and control
44:40: Splitting vs. scaling, and reaching out for connection
49:10: When perfectionistic tendencies invade our relationships
54:10: The intention that drives real goals, and finding your metric for measuring success
1:07:10: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:20:0019/08/2024
The Shadow: Individuation, Wholeness, and Becoming Your True Self
Dr. Rick and Forrest explore one of the most interesting concepts in psychology: Carl Jung’s concept of the shadow. The shadow includes the “the things a person has no wish to be,” the uncomfortable aspects of ourselves that we deny or ignore. Facing those parts can be difficult, but becoming aware of the shadow, accepting it, and integrating it allows us to embrace all of who we are.
They start by explaining what the shadow is, where it comes from, and why it’s valuable. Rick shares some examples of shadow material, what we lose by leaving them behind, and how we can start reintegrating them. Forrest talks about modern approaches to shadow work, and viewing the shadow through a less dualistic lens. They then map out the “typical” path of what is usually a highly individualized process.
Hope you enjoy it!
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:50: Defining the shadow - things we leave out, or don’t care to know
4:30: Individuation
12:05: Some examples of shadow material
18:35: What do we lose by not incorporating the shadow?
23:10: Agency, creativity, authenticity, and unrecognized capabilities
26:50: Patience, knowing your why, inner refuge, and befriending parts
32:00: Acceptance, awareness of projection, and being in dialog with our shadow
38:10: Deliberate practice, stepping into the wild, and showing curiosity
46:25: The golden shadow, and accepting impulses vs. acting on them
55:30: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:08:5112/08/2024
Dealing with Other People’s Defenses
Forrest and Dr. Rick tackle the tricky topic of dealing with other people’s psychological defenses. It’s often easier to see other people’s defenses than to see our own, which can make them particularly frustrating to deal with. In this episode, Rick and Forrest explore the psychological and communication skills that will allow you to have more successful conversations.
They start with a quick summary of what psychological defenses are and how they operate, before talking about recognizing our biases, showing empathy, and establishing a productive tone. Rick explains how to break the cycle of counterattacks that can happen when people get defensive, and how to balance different needs for closeness and distance. Topics include effective communication skills, moving from criticism toward values, managing frustration, and helping other people become more self-aware.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction, psychological defenses recap
3:40: Why can’t we see other people’s defenses?
10:35: Recognizing our own vulnerabilities, and showing empathy
14:20: Setting the tone
20:10: Disrupting the cycle of counterattacks
24:20: Approaching differing needs for closeness and distance
31:15: Joining with empathy before escalating requests
38:55: A mutual orientation toward growth
41:45: Seeing openings for dialog when they present themselves
43:40: Basing dialog around values vs. criticism
47:40: Managing frustration
53:25: Is there any way to help others become more self-aware?
1:01:35: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:14:3505/08/2024
If You’re “Too Self-Aware,” Listen to This
Have you ever felt like you knew yourself a little too well? While self-awareness is usually helpful, it can sometimes lead to overwhelm, anxiety, confusion, and self-consciousness. In this episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest explore what we can do if we feel like we’re “too self-aware.”
They begin by identifying some of the issues that can arise with self-awareness, differentiating it from self-consciousness, and highlighting how conflict between different parts can stop us from becoming who we want to be. They then discuss how developing ego strength can help us become more authentic and free in our behavior. Rick then guides Forrest through a role-play exercise aimed at reducing self-consciousness and social anxiety, and addressing parts of ourselves we may not like.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:40: Can we be "too self-aware?"
3:55: Three ways self-awareness can cause problems, and four stages of growth
8:25: Outside-in vs. inside-out change, and self-consciousness
14:20: Authenticity, feeling stuck, and internalizing judgment
18:45: Ego strength, and what helps people navigate overwhelm
29:10: What not to do, and a roleplay example with Forrest
35:00: Showing interest in others, and rumination
40:15: More roleplay with Forrest, anxiety, overanalysis, and shame
53:25: Qualities we like and can embrace about an exiled part
1:01:30: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:12:1529/07/2024
How to Get Out of a Depressed Mood
About 30% of people will experience depression at some point in their lives, and most of us know what a depressed mood feels like. Because depressive episodes are common, there’s no lack of good advice out there. But depression is so challenging in part because it attacks our ability to do anything about it. Depression saps our energy, is demotivating, and makes it difficult to actually put that good advice into practice. In this episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest explore what we can do about this, and how we can break out of an episode of depressed mood.
They start by talking about what causes depression, introduce the biopsychosocial model, and identify an overall framework for most depressive episodes. Rick and Forrest then explain the vicious cycle of depressed mood before focusing on what a person can do practically to break the cycle. Topics include identifying mindsets, changing how we interpret information, fully experiencing our emotions, rumination and ruminatory processes, taking in the good, and creating openness to possibility.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:15: Distinguishing a depressed mood from MDD
7:25: Causes of depression
12:00: Absolutist beliefs and self-compassion
17:45: The paradox of motivation, and small ways to break the cycle
24:20: Fully experiencing your feelings, and emotional release
30:05: Discerning between thoughts and experiences
38:30: Rumination, finding evidence of positive change, and interoception
42:50: Recognizing what you don’t know, being receptive to love, and simply being
52:00: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
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01:06:5522/07/2024
Why You’re Stuck, and How to Fix It
Most of us have gone through a time in life when it felt like we were stuck: unable to deal with our issues, change in useful ways, or make our lives the way we wanted them to be. It’s often not for lack of trying. You read the books, you followed the exercises, you maybe even saw a therapist…but it just didn’t help. On today’s episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest explore why this happens, and what we can do about it.
Rick shares a simple framework we can approach change through before Forrest digs into the six key factors that prevent us from changing. They talk about self-acceptance and how we can relax our attachment to the current version of ourselves, before moving on to factors that affect motivation. They then discuss working with fears, becoming courageous, and leaning into a more authentic version of who we are.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:25: What we can (and can’t) change
4:15: Taking inventory: What hasn’t worked?
9:00: Seeing what’s true
15:25: Holding onto an identity, recognizing your defenses, and experimenting
29:55: Motivating yourself, and releasing feelings of guilt
36:35: Secondary gains
46:30: Courage, boredom, and fear of the unknown
50:20: Appreciating how our environment influences us
55:40: Seeing what’s already working, and getting new inputs
1:04:00: Authentically being you
1:06:55: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:17:1615/07/2024
Depression and Self-Care, Accepting Love, and Building Stronger Relationships: July Mailbag
Dr. Rick and Forrest open the mailbag and answer questions focused on strengthening our relationships. They explore how we can support friends and loved ones who are experiencing depression while also caring for ourselves, managing different levels of capacity within a relationship, maintaining self-worth and trust in the context of body image insecurities, and navigating the often tricky dynamics of a partner’s relationship with their ex. The episode closes with Rick and Forrest sharing how they’ve handled repair in their parent/child relationship, and what we can do to manage anxieties about the future.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:40: Establishing boundaries with a loved one who is depressed
11:00: Managing different levels of capacity in a relationship
16:45: Body image insecurity, and trusting that others love us
31:45: How do I navigate my partner's relationship with their ex?
42:15: I’m nervous that as my child ages they’ll blame me for my parenting. What can I do?
1:02:15: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:14:0708/07/2024
How to Become a Disciplined Person
If we want to accomplish something in life it usually takes a combination of motivation and consistency - in other words, discipline. Discipline is both essential…and shockingly hard to develop. In today’s episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick explore how we can become more disciplined. They talk about whether discipline came naturally to Rick, and the lessons we can learn from his journey with discipline. Key topics include how to make even frustrating tasks rewarding, the relationship between discipline and self-concept, how to identify key wants, needs, and aspirations, and learning to feel good when we do good.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:30: Rick’s personal history with cultivating discipline
5:45: Finding reward in necessary tasks
17:50: Engaging in your life, and knowing what you really care about
22:35: The power of your self-concept
31:45: Breaking things down into small parts
36:45: Motivation, distress tolerance, and meta-motivation
46:35: Getting out of a negative mindset, and finding what works for you
54:10: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:05:3601/07/2024
Psychological Defenses: How to Understand (and change) Your Mind and Behavior
Psychological defenses are subconscious strategies we use to protect ourselves from uncomfortable emotions, and they exert a hidden power over our behavior. From denial and repression to projection and rationalization, Dr. Rick and Forrest explore how these defenses shape our actions, influence our relationships, and affect our overall well-being.
They start with the function and structure of most defenses, before giving a few simple examples. Rick then dives into the role of defenses in psychoanalytic theory, their role in managing self-worth and shame, and what we can do to become less defensive over time. They close with practical strategies for working with our defenses, including a brief discussion of what we can do to help other people with their defenses.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:30: Psychological and historical factors influencing psychological defensiveness
8:00: Some examples of unconscious anxiety bubbling up
12:00: Repression, regression, projection, reaction formation, and sublimation
16:55: An overview of Freud’s developmental model of the personality
24:10: A few examples of how our defenses manifest
33:40: Consciousness, competence, and joining the defense
44:00: Navigating shame and guilt
50:15: Distress tolerance
57:15: Social connection, and finding healthy outlets
1:00:20: When and how to approach others about their defensiveness
1:10:45: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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01:23:0924/06/2024
The Fawn Response: People Pleasing, Self-Abandonment, and Standing Up for Yourself
Dr. Rick and Forrest finish their series on the stress responses with the fawn response: an appeasement strategy where we manage stressful situations by giving others what they want. Rick and Forrest start by discussing common symptoms, including people pleasing, self-abandonment, difficulty saying no, weak boundaries, and chronic self-sacrifice. They talk about the roots of the fawn response and its connection to complex PTSD before exploring people pleasing in detail. In the second half of the episode they focus on practical tools for developing healthy boundaries, self-acceptance, and a stronger sense of self.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:15: What the fawn response looks like
9:05: Power imbalances, shame, and contempt
11:35: What personal history tends to lead to fawning?
20:00: How to work on the tendency to fawn
36:30: Shame, self-acceptance, and opening up to self-expression
41:25: The fawn response in relationship
46:40: Becoming your own source of safety
52:20: Making equitable arrangements, and acknowledging your best efforts
1:01:50: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
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01:11:5117/06/2024
How to Create a Secure Relationship with Elizabeth Ferreira
Somatic trauma therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins Forrest to explore how we can create more secure relationships. They talk about the lessons they've learned from their relationship, the impact of trauma and prior relationship wounds, and how very different people can make things work. Topics include complex PTSD, how to work through disagreements, changing our model of relationships, and learning how to actually support your partner.
I loved this conversation, and hope you enjoy it!
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:10: The myth of relationships solving your problems, and self-awareness
4:25: Me, you, and us
13:45: Changing your partner by changing yourself
16:45: Embracing the challenges of vulnerability
23:25: Disagreeing well, making specific requests, and holding space
33:05: Learning how to support your partner
37:40: Five different styles of relationship
40:55: Moving from trying to please your partner to showing compassion
45:15: Love as a choice, and expressing wants and needs positively
49:30: Simply liking your partner
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Connect with the show:
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52:4310/06/2024
Becoming Self-Confident, Learning Healthy Relationship Skills, and Trusting Yourself: June Mailbag
Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners. They explore how to deal with chronically negative people, managing avoidant tendencies that get in the way of us finding a great relationship, and separating normal desires for support from more problematic ones. They then talk about how we can build self-confidence and become more internally referenced, before closing the episode with a sticky situation involving supporting an aging parent.
If you’d like to send in a question to be answered on the podcast, join our Patreon or email us at [email protected].
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:00: My friend is chronically negative, what can I do?
13:05: How can I move past a cycle of avoidance that’s inhibiting my ability to find a good relationship?
26:05: I want to be supported by my partner, but I’m worried about becoming enmeshed. How can I seek help in a healthy way?
39:30: How do I stop seeking validation from others?
45:20: How do I react to ongoing criticism from an aging parent?
58:15: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
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01:08:1303/06/2024
The Psychology of Manifesting: How to Create the Life You Want
Forrest and Dr. Rick explore “manifesting:” the idea that our thoughts impact the world around us, and by changing those thoughts we can change our lives. Talking about manifesting is complicated, because on the one hand our thoughts really do matter. On the other, manifesting is closely tied to a small mountain of problematic pseudoscience. They discuss and debate some of the issues with manifesting and the law of attraction before focusing on how to apply key psychological principles to create the life you want.
Rick and Forrest talk about creating clarity around our goals, setting intentions, improving self-worth and self-efficacy, and overcoming some of the negative unconscious beliefs that can get in our way, before exploring authenticity, consistent effort, and working with fear and inhibition. Then Rick closes the episode by walking us through a practical example of how to change a belief.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
3:00: Defining manifestation, and separating psychological and supernatural mechanisms of action
6:55: The mind-body connection, and the psychological aspects of manifesting
15:50: Charlatanism, preying on uncertainty, and the problems with the law of attraction
25:20: Changing behavior vs. changing thoughts, and the lure of the supernatural
32:10: If you want to skip the context, start here.
32:35: Getting what we subconsciously believe we are worthy of, and “don’t know” mind
38:50: Identifying wants, surrendering to the best within us, and using pain as a guide
48:55: Embracing the reality of consistent effort
54:55: How to change a negative belief
1:08:10: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Connect with the show:
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01:21:1427/05/2024
Understanding the “Flight” Response: Anxiety, Avoidance, and Feeling Safe
Dr. Rick and Forrest discuss the “flight” response to stress, which includes feelings of anxiety and fear, avoidant behavior, and an underlying sense of insecurity. They explore the emotions and behaviors associated with the flight response, and how we can build up a stronger, more secure sense of who we are. Rick shares some practical tools that will help you change your self-concept, safely apply principles from graduated exposure, and feel safer from the inside-out.
I’ve loved this series on the stress responses, and think you’ll get a lot out of this episode.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:00: The purpose of the flight response, and when it is and isn’t useful
5:35: Social withdrawal, conflict avoidance, and preserving safety vs. comfort
12:15: The trouble with low likelihood, high-cost risks
16:35: Exploring our capacity for stress, and identifying the risks worth taking
26:30: Feeling “sturdy,” and why we choose the flight response vs. other stress responses
33:30: Graduated exposure
39:05: Learning to trust our new capabilities as we change
44:50: Overdoing a change as a form of self-sabotage, and reserving the power to flee
54:25: Responding to anxiety
1:01:40: Being present with painful situations we can’t escape
1:08:40: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
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Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:17:4520/05/2024
Managing The “Fight” Response: Anger, Repression, and Self-Regulation
Dr. Rick and Forrest continue their series on the stress responses with the “fight” response to stress. They explore anger, repression, and the balance of self-expression and self-regulation before talking about how we can claim the adaptive aspects of the fight response without falling prey to its more problematic aspects. A major focus of the episode is resentment and repression, alongside related topics like empowering yourself, managing expectations, and “experiencing out.”
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:15: The useful aspects of anger
5:40: Specific behaviors associated with the fight response
8:35: Giving yourself permission to express anger
13:40: Navigating resentment
21:40: Thwarted expectations as a source of unhealthy anger
32:05: Claiming your anger, and being wary of its seductive nature
35:45: Developing an authentic sense of empowerment
39:45: Going from complaint to request
43:30: Antidotes to unhealthy anger
52:40: Challenging authority without feeling intimidated or shamed
54:20: When we’re angry at ourselves
59:00: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:08:5813/05/2024
Everything You Need to Know About Therapy
In this mega-episode, clinical psychologist Dr. Rick Hanson and Forrest Hanson explore everything you need to know about therapy. They share how you can get more from therapy, finding the approach that’s right for you, and some perspectives on why therapy is so expensive. They then run through the five major schools of Western psychotherapy before discussing a few alternative modalities. You’ll learn how long to stick with a therapist before looking for alternatives, questions to ask a prospective therapist, and how to maximize your results.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:40: The biggest factors that contribute to therapy going well
7:25: Finding the therapeutic modality that works for you
14:00: The cost of therapy, and the problem created by insurance companies
20:35: The five major schools of western psychotherapy
21:20: Psychodynamic therapy, and investigating the unconscious
23:20: Behavioral therapy, and variable reinforcement
25:55: Humanistic psychology, and seeing the good in yourself
29:05: Cognitive therapy, why insurance companies like CBT, and exploring our beliefs
36:15: Mindfulness-based therapies, and being with our experiences
41:15: Family systems therapy, social justice, somatic therapy, and non-Western thinking
46:20: The differences (and similarities) between therapy and coaching
52:40: How long therapy should take, and how to evaluate if it’s working
1:02:15: The role of client motivation
1:04:55: Questions to ask a prospective therapist
1:10:15: The importance of the therapist’s engagement
1:12:50: Common qualities Rick found challenging with past clients
1:16:05: The importance of internalizing change, and recognizing what’s really shifting
1:21:20: Recap
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
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Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:32:0506/05/2024
Healing After Trauma with Dr. Peter Levine
Somatic psychology legend Dr. Peter Levine joins Dr. Rick and Forrest to explore how we can use body-based approaches to recover from traumatic experiences. Peter uses his personal history with trauma to illustrate the practices he’s taught to thousands of people through his work. They discuss the importance of resourcing experiences, creating safety, developing interoception, abandonment wounds, bringing a diverse perspective to somatic work, and working with shame.
Please be aware that this episode includes a description of sexual assault.
About our Guest: Dr. Peter Levine is the creator of Somatic Experiencing and the Founder and President of the Ergos Institute for Somatic Education. He’s taught at a number of universities, has received Lifetime Achievement awards from numerous organizations, and is the best-selling author of several books, including Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma, and his most recent book An Autobiography of Trauma: A Healing Journey.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:15: Peter’s dream about publishing his recent book
6:40: Themes connecting the personal and professional for Peter
10:15: Physicalization, pendulation, and decontextualization of trauma
16:15: Presence with others, and moving gently into shame to move through it
20:55: The fundamental view that we our innately healthy, and completing the arc
23:05: When the prompt “feel it in your body” doesn’t work
28:15: Advice for when you don’t have access to therapy or a SEP practitioner
30:35: Tenderness
34:30: Anchoring in the here and now when accessing past memories
39:35: Conceiving of yourself as a source of safety
43:30: Generating your own internal wellbeing
46:20: Acknowledging the reality of your history, patience, and completion
49:45: Living by dying
52:15: Recap
Offer from Dr. Rick: If you'd like to improve your self-worth, check out Rick's new 4-hour, live online workshop. You'll learn methods and practices that can actually change your brain and your habits, so you start nurturing your sense of worth and belonging. Our listeners can get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20: https://selfworthworkshop.com/
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
57:3729/04/2024
Recovering from a Challenging Childhood: Reclaim, Resupply, and Repair
Dr. Rick and Forrest explore a huge topic: what can we do to recover from a difficult childhood as an adult? Rick introduces a three step process that can help us reclaim our past, identify the key needs we have these days, and internalize related positive experiences. They discuss related tools from psychology like releasing repressed emotions, claiming agency where we can, and changing what we emphasize in the story of our lives. If you had a hard time growing up, this one’s for you.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:40: Recovering from childhood wounds - Reclaim, Resupply, and Repair
7:00: Clarifying your personal narrative, and the importance of agency
12:25: How the unmet needs from your past impacts your present
18:25: Changing what we emphasize in the story we tell ourselves
28:50: Letting the fizz out of the bottle
32:20: Identifying the right medicine for your unresolved wounds
38:00: How developing competency helps you break free from your past
41:50: Self-soothing through envisioning positive experiences
45:00: The process of letting go of the childhood you wish you had
57:50: Naming what you want from life, and the universal ground of being
1:02:00: Recap
Offer from Dr. Rick: If you'd like to improve your self-worth, check out Rick's new 4-hour, live online workshop. You'll learn methods and practices that can actually change your brain and your habits, so you start nurturing your sense of worth and belonging. Our listeners can get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20: https://selfworthworkshop.com/
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
Visit airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BEING to receive up to $300 off air purifiers! When you use our code, you’ll also receive a free 3-year warranty on any unit, an $84 value
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
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Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
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Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:09:1422/04/2024
Dealing with Emotionally Immature People (and Parents) with Dr. Lindsay Gibson
Dr. Lindsay Gibson joins the podcast to share her groundbreaking work on emotional maturity. Forrest and Dr. Gibson explore how growing up with emotionally immature caregivers can affect our adult relationships, and what we can do to recover from these experiences, build healthier patterns, and disentangle from emotionally immature people. They start by discussing what emotional immaturity means, some of its key characteristics, and the consequences of growing up with emotionally immature parents. They then talk about how we can move away from “role-self” and develop a deeper connection with who we really are. You’ll learn practical tools for recognizing emotionally immature people, managing your relationships with them effectively, and establishing healthy boundaries.
About our Guest: Dr. Lindsay Gibson is a clinical psychologist and the author of a number of books including Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents and Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People. Her most recent work is the Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents Guided Journal.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:20: What is emotional immaturity?
7:25: Affective realism and involuntary coping mechanisms
14:00: An example of a childhood with emotionally immature caregivers
18:50: The “role-self,” and how children respond to a parent’s lack of empathy
25:15: Receiving guidance from the authentic self
29:25: How the role-self affects relationships in adulthood
41:25: Healthier relationships by connecting with the authentic self
50:10: Letting go of healing fantasies in adult relationships
56:10: Guilt, emotional coercion, fear of loneliness, and finding optimal distance
1:02:55: How to identify with yourself as a secure base
1:06:20: Recap
Offer from Dr. Rick: If you'd like to improve your self-worth, check out Rick's new 4-hour, live online workshop. You'll learn methods and practices that can actually change your brain and your habits, so you start nurturing your sense of worth and belonging. Our listeners can get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20: https://selfworthworkshop.com/
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
Visit airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BEING to receive up to $300 off air purifiers! When you use our code, you’ll also receive a free 3-year warranty on any unit, an $84 value
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:18:1115/04/2024
How to Make the Most of Your 20s with Dr. Meg Jay
Twentysomethings are bombarded with misinformation, hype, and contradictory messages that pull them in many different directions. Dr. Meg Jay, a specialist on what she calls the “defining decade,” joins Forrest to explore how we can navigate this transformative and often anxiety-provoking time in our lives. They discuss the biggest misunderstandings about our 20s, balancing having fun with setting yourself up for the future, and common mental health issues. Topics include the pitfalls of self-diagnosis, creating a strong self-concept and building identity capital, dealing with burnout, strengthening our relationships, and more.
About our Guest: Dr. Meg Jay is a developmental clinical psychologist who specializes in twentysomethings. She is on faculty at the University of Virginia, and is the author of a number of wonderful books, including The Defining Decade and her new book The Twentysomething Treatment: A Revolutionary Remedy for an Uncertain Age.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:20: The biggest misunderstanding about life in your 20s
4:55: Uncertainty, and becoming confident in our abilities
8:30: Nihilism about the current state of the world
14:50: Self-diagnosis, social media, and over medication
23:25: The “strength of weak ties”
27:20: Self-concept and identity capital
30:30: What helps people take action
34:15: Navigating avoidance and anxiety
41:55: Finding evidence that you’re capable of being loved
46:35: What to do you when you feel stuck
49:20: How to choose purpose
58:55: Advice to people who feel like they messed up their 20s
1:04:45: Recap
Offer from Dr. Rick: If you'd like to improve your self-worth, check out Rick's new 4-hour, live online workshop. You'll learn methods and practices that can actually change your brain and your habits, so you start nurturing your sense of worth and belonging. Our listeners can get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20: https://selfworthworkshop.com/
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:16:0308/04/2024
Managing the Freeze Response: Dissociation, Emotional Shutdown, and Creating Safety
What do dissociation, avoidance, and emotional shutdown all have in common? They’re connected to the “freeze” response to stress. In one of our favorite episodes to date, Dr. Rick and Forrest explore the freeze response in detail.
They talk about what stress responses are, how they impact our behavior, and why different people tend to default to different coping strategies. Forrest explains what freezing looks like in practice, and why the freeze response can be particularly difficult to navigate. Dr. Rick then shares a number of helpful strategies for working with the freeze response, including strengthening self-confidence, and the feeling of ourselves as someone who can create safety. Towards the end of the episode they discuss managing these tendencies in a relationship.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:15: Understanding stress responses
9:05: Stress responses in relationship
15:25: Why it's hard to see that you're freezing
19:05: Dissociation, and what freezing looks like in practice
23:55: Steps of moving through dissociation
30:05: Self-awareness, ‘global’ conditioning, and unconditional positive regard
38:10: How Rick would work with someone who freezes: a hypothetical case study
53:45: Seeing yourself as a source of safety
1:02:55: Recap
Offer from Dr. Rick: If you'd like to improve your self-worth, check out Rick's new 4-hour, live online workshop. You'll learn methods and practices that can actually change your brain and your habits, so you start nurturing your sense of worth and belonging. Our listeners can get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20: https://selfworthworkshop.com/
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Get your stand on with UPLIFT Desk! Go to UPLIFT Desk.com/BEINGWELL for 5% off your order of one of their fantastic standing desks or office products.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:13:4101/04/2024
Working with Irrational Fears, Setting Healthy Boundaries, and Understanding Therapy: March Mailbag
Forrest and Dr. Rick open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners focused on how we can work with irrational fears, create separation from our thoughts and feelings, and set healthy boundaries in dysfunctional families. Rick then goes off on the topic of “evidence-based” vs. “not evidence-based” approaches to therapy, leading to an interesting conversation about research, statistical significance, and what makes for good therapy. We think you’ll enjoy this one, thanks for listening!
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:25: How can I respond to fears I know are irrational?
11:05: How can I disidentify from my thoughts?
21:35: How do I set healthy boundaries in a dysfunctional family system?
39:25: Are “not evidence-based” therapeutic approaches such as IFS or somatic therapy inferior to “evidence-based” approaches like CBT?
55:20: My relationship is full of conflict, and I’m considering divorce. How should I think this through?
1:05:10: Recap
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Soonsors
Get your stand on with UPLIFT Desk! Go to UPLIFT Desk.com/BEINGWELL for 5% off your order of one of their fantastic standing desks or office products.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Start each day right with IQBAR’s bars, hydration mixes, and mushroom coffees. Just text BEINGWELL to sixty-four thousand (64-000) and get an exclusive offer of 20% off plus free shipping.
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
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Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
01:15:0025/03/2024
10 Things We Wish We Knew in Our 20s
Our 20s are a unique decade filled with opportunity…including the opportunity to make a lot of mistakes. On today’s episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest share (roughly) 10 things they wish they’d known back then. They explore the balance of enjoying freedom with the compounding value of effort, a framework for finding meaning and purpose, and some of the common pitfalls that keep us stuck. Regardless of where you are in life, you’ll learn how to find and embrace your natural talents, appreciate meaningful relationships, and see things in a new light.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:35: The importance of the choices you make in your 20s
4:45: Balance the freedom of youth with the value of action
8:00: Embrace mentorship
13:40: Find the Three Circles: Talent, Enjoyment, and Values
21:30: Try things, and let yourself change
24:20: Avoid getting stuck (and codependent relationships)
27:35: Identify useful feedback
31:00: Avoid swerving away from natural talents, kindred spirits, good advice, and failure
36:05: The intrinsic value of creating, and lightening up about results
38:25: Focus on where you have agency
44:45: Appreciate relationships based on shared values
46:55: You get to decide what your relationships look like
47:50: Showing appreciation for your younger self
49:50: Recap
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Get your stand on with UPLIFT Desk! Go to UPLIFT Desk.com/BEINGWELL for 5% off your order of one of their fantastic standing desks or office products.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Start each day right with IQBAR’s bars, hydration mixes, and mushroom coffees. Just text BEINGWELL to sixty-four thousand (64-000) and get an exclusive offer of 20% off plus free shipping.
Connect with the show:
Subscribe on iTunes
Follow Forrest on YouTube
Follow us on Instagram
Follow Forrest on Instagram
Follow Rick on Facebook
Follow Forrest on Facebook
Visit Forrest's website
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
55:5518/03/2024
Repairing Self-Abandonment: Anxious Attachment, Healthy Boundaries, and Creating Strong Relationships
On today’s episode Dr. Rick and Forrest explore self-abandonment, which occurs when we go against our authentic wants, emotions, and boundaries in order to serve others, meet external expectations, or protect ourselves emotionally. They cover where self-abandonment comes from, the psychological function it serves, and the relationship between self-abandonment and similar concepts like anxious attachment, low self-worth, and external referencing. You’ll learn how to set healthy boundaries, stop neglecting yourself, and become more secure from the inside out.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:00: Common features of self-abandonment
12:30: Facing the fear of our authentic self being seen
16:05: Facing shame and self-criticism
21:00: Self-referencing vs. referencing ourselves in relation to others
33:10: The belief that safety feels more critical than authenticity
40:55: Our relationship to nature, and joining with the defense
50:55: Relationships, openness to change, and bringing parts into awareness
55:20: Cognitive restructuring, and redefining our self-abandoning beliefs
58:50: Recap
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
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01:06:5911/03/2024
Emotional Eating and Changing Your Relationship with Food with Dr. Jud Brewer
There are as many ways to have a difficult relationship with food as there are ways to eat. It’s hard to get conversations about these challenges right, but today we’re taking the plunge and exploring the habit of eating when we’re not hungry with psychiatrist Dr. Jud Brewer.
Dr. Rick, Forrest, and Dr. Jud start by discussing our often flawed approach to conversations about eating patterns, shame spirals, and the many problems with diets. They then move the conversation from what we eat to how we eat, applying Dr. Jud’s work on habits and craving to the challenge of emotional eating. Specific topics include the neuroscience behind how our hunger cues and emotional cues get mixed up, common habit loops related to food, reward value and the importance of creating a prediction error, the nature of craving as wanting without liking, mindfulness-based tools, and how we can create a bigger, better offer for our brains.
About our Guest: Dr. Jud Brewer is a psychiatrist, the director of research and innovation at Brown University’s Mindfulness Center, a professor in Behavioral and Social Sciences at the School of Public Health and Psychiatry at the School of Medicine at Brown University, and a research affiliate at MIT. He’s also the bestselling author of a number of books, including The Craving Mind, Unwinding Anxiety, and his most recent book The Hunger Habit.
Disclaimer: If you struggle with a serious restrictive eating disorder like anorexia or bulimia nervosa, the material in this conversation will not support your needs. Please consider working with your doctor or mental health clinician, or using the free resources at www.nationaleatingdisorders.org. If you need immediate help, call the ANAD hotline at 1-888-375-7767.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction and disclaimer
2:40: The surprising finding from Jud’s smoking cessation program
6:05: What Jud’s new book is not about, and information vs. behavior
11:05: The mental health impact of dieting, and the problem with willpower
18:05: Hedonic hunger, and food-mood wiring
24:15: Bringing awareness to how we eat, and our cultural conditioning
31:50: Developing freedom of choice, and the MBSR raisin exercise
36:20: A walkthrough of mindful eating
44:25: When you don't want to let go of a behavior, and finding the bigger better offer
52:50: Kindness, curiosity, and other tools for improving interoception
57:00: Ways to find the bigger better offer
1:07:45: Caring for our future self
1:11:30: Recap
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Get your stand on with UPLIFT Desk! Go to UPLIFT Desk.com/BEINGWELL for 5% off your order of one of their fantastic standing desks or office products.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Start each day right with IQBAR’s bars, hydration mixes, and mushroom coffees. Just text BEINGWELL to sixty-four thousand (64-000) and get an exclusive offer of 20% off plus free shipping.
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01:21:1904/03/2024
Somatic Tools for Self-Regulation with Elizabeth Ferreira
One of the most important skills we can learn is how to regulate ourselves, riding the emotional waves without either ignoring or being overwhelmed by them. Associate therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins Forrest to explore how we can feel our feelings while staying calm, collected, and in control. They walk through two examples of under- and over-regulation, and Elizabeth offers specific practices that might help in each common situation.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:50: Creating safety and connection with a new client
6:30: Therapy as an opportunity for reparative experiences
9:45: Learning to regulate when you have traumatized parts
16:55: What’s helped Elizabeth heal patterns of overregulation and dissociation
23:50: A hypothetical dialogue with an overregulated client
29:10: Titration and traumatic release
33:05: Labeling and accepting emotions, and empowering the “wise adult”
40:15: A hypothetical dialogue with an underregulated client
46:30: Celebrating when we notice our patterns
49:30: Movement, tapping, tremoring, journaling, and other practices
53:55: Finding a supportive community
57:10: Being with your body, and following your curiosity
58:55: Recap
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Start each day right with IQBAR’s brain-and-body-boosting bars, hydration mixes, and mushroom coffees. Just text BEINGWELL to sixty-four thousand (64-000) and get an exclusive offer of 20% off plus free shipping.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
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01:04:3226/02/2024
Build Strong Relationships and Heal in Community with Dr. Joy Harden Bradford
Our relationships are some of the most important parts of our life, and our happiness is often directly correlated to the strength of those relationships. Dr. Joy Harden Bradford joins the podcast to explore how we can apply lessons from group therapy to build stronger friendships. Forrest and Dr. Joy focus on how we can build the trust necessary for vulnerability, how attachment issues show up in friendships, and the common friend roles you might be placing yourself into without realizing it.
About our Guest: Dr. Joy is a Licensed Psychologist based out of Atlanta, Georgia, the host of the wildly popular podcast Therapy for Black Girls – which has more than 34 million downloads - and the author of the recently released book Sisterhood Heals: The Transformative Power of Healing in Community.
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:20: What group therapy is like, and some its unique advantages
5:50: Creating a safe container for vulnerability
11:50: Trust, loyalty, respect, and gender dynamics
19:55: Attachment patterns in friendships
25:50: The Wallflower, the Leader, the Peacemaker, and the Firecracker
33:30: Navigating social circles with differing levels of openness to change
36:35: Challenges identifying, accepting, and expressing our needs
41:40: Specific challenges for black women in getting needs met
46:15: How stigma around therapy has changed over time
48:55: Curiosity, and guidelines for global sisterhood
52:00: Recap
Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
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Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
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01:00:2919/02/2024
How to ADHD with Jessica McCabe
ADHD is one of the most common - and most misunderstood - conditions out there, and today we’re setting the record straight with author and YouTuber Jessica McCabe. Jessica joins Forrest to explore her journey with ADHD, dealing with common challenges like self-criticism, shame, and sensitivity, and how we can work with our unique brain, not against it.
About our Guest: Jessica McCabe is the creator of the popular YouTube channel How to ADHD and author of the new book How to ADHD: An Insider’s Guide to Working with Your Brain, Not Against It.
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there. You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:15: Jessica’s history with ADHD, and how she wrote her book
7:15: Stigma, pride, self-criticism, and letting others help you
12:05: Dealing with shame
14:55: Self-advocacy, self-acceptance, and asking the right questions
24:40: Believing in your experience
27:45: Common misconceptions about ADHD
31:40: The relationship between ADHD and emotional sensitivity and regulation
36:05: Creating a sense of community
39:25: Advice for partners, family, and friends of people with ADHD
47:25: Recap
Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
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55:2712/02/2024
The (real) Secret to Happiness: Attachment, Craving, and Enjoying Life
Forrest and Dr. Rick focus on the secret to everyday happiness: learning how to like without wanting. They talk about the lies our brain tells us, the rapid movement from liking to wanting, and how we can enjoy an experience without craving more of it. They then explore a specific example of getting captured by the brain’s “inner ad agency,” and what we can do to stay in the present, meet key needs, and see the whole of our experience without getting trapped by any one part. You won’t want to miss this one!
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:00: Liking, wanting, and healthy desire
11:30: The story craving tells us
15:00: Inhibition and “prudishness” around liking
21:15: “21st century problems”
25:35: A personal example of getting trapped by desire
29:05: Meeting your legitimate needs, somatic cues, and inner freedom
35:20: The search for the slightly better experience
42:25: The brain’s prediction errors, and longing for what is already here
47:50: The ability to zoom out and see the full spectrum of our experience
59:25: Recap
Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors:
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
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01:10:4205/02/2024
Mindfulness for Depression, Pain, and Suffering with Dr. Danny Penman
On today’s episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest focus on one of the most important skills we can learn: how we can become more aware of all the parts of our experience, avoid being captured by any one of them, and work with those parts more skillfully. One of the key tools we have for accomplishing this is vedanā, or the “feeling tone” of our experience. Author and meditation teacher Dr. Danny Penman joins the show to explore the role of vedanā, how we can help our brain interpret the world more accurately, and practical tools for relaxing suffering and enjoying life.
About our Guest: Danny Penman is a meditation teacher, an award-winning writer and journalist, and the co-author of the classic Mindfulness with Dr. Mark Williams. Dr. Williams was one of the original creators of Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT). Mark and Danny are back with the new book Deeper Mindfulness: The New Way to Rediscover Calm in a Chaotic World.
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:40: How a major injury started Danny’s professional relationship with mindfulness practice
10:45: Vedanā, and unpacking the different aspects of our experience
18:20: The sensations that precede our thoughts
24:45: How the brain creates a model of reality, and whether that model is accurate
29:40: How an undisciplined relationship with feeling tone creates unnecessary suffering
37:00: Accepting a feeling vs. approving of a situation
44:10: Practical steps to feeling our feelings
48:00: Finding enjoyment in new habits, especially somatically
57:50: Recap
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors:
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
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01:06:1729/01/2024
Dealing with a Mental Health Crisis, Trauma and Meditation, and Getting Back on the Wagon: January Mailbag
Forrest and Dr. Rick open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners. How can we understand and support someone going through a mental health crisis? Is meditation enough to heal trauma? And what can we do about family members that just won’t change? You’ll learn why offering help isn’t always helpful, how to deal with unskillful feedback, and approaches that help with setting and achieving long-term goals.
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:55: Question #1 - How can I support a friend who is going through a mental health crisis?
7:10: What’s a “psychotic break,” and being careful with clinical terminology.
12:00: Question #2 - Is it possible to heal trauma through meditation alone?
20:25: Question #3 - How do I start again when I’ve fallen off the wagon?
27:30: Question #4 - Is feedback necessary for growth? And what kind of feedback is helpful?
33:10: Question #5 - How can I improve my relationship with money?
42:20: Question #6 - I’m very frustrated with a family member who just won’t change their bad behavior. What can I do?
54:05: Recap
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors:
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
Connect with the show:
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01:01:2522/01/2024
Internal Family Systems: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with Dr. Richard Schwartz
Dr. Rick and Forrest are joined by Dr. Richard Schwartz, creator of the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model of therapy, to explore how we can integrate all the aspects of who we are. They explain the IFS model, the nature of parts and their roles, and how we can use this knowledge to increase self-awareness and deal with common problems. Then Rick and Dr. Schwartz dive deep into the nature of the “Self,” where it comes from, and how we can tune into and strengthen it.
This was a wide-ranging conversation, and we were thrilled to have Dr. Schwartz on the podcast again. You won’t want to miss this one.
About our Guest: Dr. Richard “Dick” Schwartz is the creator of the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model of therapy, and has authored a number of books and over fifty articles focused on IFS. His newest book is No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model.
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:15: Quick explanation of the IFS Model
6:45: Releasing the “Self”
11:10: Where does the Self come from?
16:00: How the practical side of IFS connects to the spiritual
23:20: The four goals of IFS, and parts of parts
26:15: Becoming your own attachment figure
32:15: Richard’s experience integrating his exiled parts
37:25: Personification in IFS. Why think in terms of “parts”?
46:15: Why befriend our “bad” parts?
49:55: The non-pathologizing nature of IFS in a clinical framework
55:25: First and second darts
57:15: Identifying parts with curiosity, courage, and physical awareness
1:03:25: How asking yourself questions gets you in touch with your intuition
1:12:45: Recap
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors:
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
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01:20:4315/01/2024
Healing Cycles of Trauma with Dr. Mariel Buqué
Dr. Mariel Buqué joins the podcast to help us learn how we can heal from the past, create healthier patterns, and break cycles of trauma. Forrest and Dr. Buqué talk about what intergenerational trauma is, how we can “hand trauma down,” and how these problematic patterns show up in the real world. They focus on what helps someone take the first steps, the key role of insight, and moving from insight to action. Along the way, Dr. Buqué shares the powerful tools that help people resource themselves to do the hard work of breaking intergenerational patterns.
About our Guest: Dr. Mariel Buqué received her doctorate in counseling psychology from Columbia University, and her work has been featured on major media outlets like The Today Show and Good Morning America. She’s the author of the new book Break the Cycle: A Guide to Healing Intergenerational Trauma, and host of the podcast by the same name.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:15: What drew Mariel to this work
10:25: How Mariel thinks about intergenerational trauma
17:00: Common patterns of her clients
20:00: Most people’s initial motivation to find healing
24:45: Courage and vulnerability with the people in our family systems
33:20: Grounding, excavating the family tree, finding healthy alternative patterns
39:40: Practices for stimulating the ventral vagal nerve
44:05: Finding a way in to healing that is accessible to you
47:40: Creating an intergenerational trauma tree
55:00: Finding steadiness when the emotional floodgates open
58:00: The shortcomings of the western medical outlook
1:00:45: Integration, and creating a short buffer between stimulus and response
1:06:15: Values and healthy pride
1:08:40: Recap
Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors:
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
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01:19:1708/01/2024
How to Get More From 2024
Dr. Rick and Forrest kick off 2024 by exploring how we can relate to the past, plan for the future, and get more from the year ahead. They talk about different approaches to New Years, the tactics that maximize your chances of achieving a goal, and a simple four question system for reflecting on and learning from the year that was. You'll learn how to create useful resolutions, put 2023 into perspective, and set yourself up for success in the year to come!
Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there.
Register for Rick’s Yearly Program! The Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like compassion, mindfulness, confidence, motivation, and courage. Visit FWBProgram.com to learn more, and get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:05: Rick's approach to New Year’s resolutions
4:05: Going from being to doing to having
10:15: Four questions to ask yourself around the New Year
22:00: A S.M.A.R.T. way to put New Year’s resolutions into form
25:45: Bottom-up intentions, and the feeling of a completed intention
29:15: Trying different somatic cues for embodying an intention
32:00: Finding your allies, not oversharing your goals, and physically declaring priorities
40:45: Getting on your own side
51:40: Recap
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors:
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
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01:01:1901/01/2024
CPTSD, Somatic Psychology, and Finding Your Happiness with Elizabeth Ferreira
Forrest and Elizabeth welcome listeners into their home to talk about their changing relationship with the holidays, letting go of the past, healthy boundaries, glimmers, and different paths to taking in the good. Along the way they talk about different approaches to working with trauma, connecting with the body, and getting on our own side.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:00: Elizabeth’s history with the holidays, and claiming your own rituals
5:20: Experiencing the holidays without an agenda
10:15: Glimmers in Polyvagal Theory
14:10: Working with a challenging relationship history
21:35: Somatic psychology, and respecting the mind
28:40: Regulating through movement
31:55: Staying yourself inside of your family
38:45: Enjoying agency, and emphasizing beauty
42:30: Entrapment and defeat, awareness, and saying no
47:15: Attachment, contracting around desire, and taking a moment for yourself
51:20: A practice of finding glimmers
55:35: Self-compassion and camaraderie during the holidays
Register for Rick’s Yearly Program! The Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like compassion, mindfulness, confidence, motivation, and courage. It’s Rick’s flagship program, and if you like Being Well you’ll probably love it. Visit FWBProgram.com to learn more, and get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors:
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
Connect with the show:
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58:0125/12/2023