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A podcast that explains how everything is psychology. Even your 20s. Hosted by Jemma Sbeg, each Tuesday and Friday we deep dive into the science and psychology behind a topic, concept or universal experience that defines our 20s - from dating, to mental health, career anxiety, friendship, finances and all the growing pains associated with this decade. Listen now.
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250. Maintaining long distance friendships in our 20s
Friendships are hard. Add in distance and they can get even harder at times. But long distance friendships seem like a fact of life in our 20s as people scatter for school, work, travel, and just because they want to. Whilst it's said that some 50% of these relationships fail, I want to give you the tools to help your long distance friendships succeed. In this episode we discuss: The psychological challenges of long distance friendships How friendship is influenced by proximity and convenience My 4 ingredient friendship formula The BEST practical tips for maintaining connection What to do when the friendship feels over Hope you enjoy, and make sure you send to your long distance pal! PREORDER MY BOOK: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/755841/person-in-progress-by-jemma-sbeg/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
39:2422/11/2024
249. 5 tips to master public speaking
Public speaking is one of our biggest fears as a species - some 75% of us list public speaking as our biggest and greatest fear. In today's episode, I want to discuss why that is and where this fear stems from, socially, psychologically and evolutionary, but also how we can transform our attitude to public speaking and excel, including tips based in psychology such as: Creating a persona and modelling a hero Embracing flow rather than a need for structure The power of slowing down Anxiety and pacing Anchoring yourself to your audience Listen now if you're ready to master your next speech or presentation! PREORDER MY BOOK: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/755841/person-in-progress-by-jemma-sbeg/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:0619/11/2024
248. The psychology of solo travelling
Solo travelling is something that we romanticise a lot in our 20s and is a big thing on many of our bucket lists. It can be such a transformative experience, it allows you to listen to your intuition better, explore the places you've always dreamed about without waiting for others and builds a unique kind of confidence. In today's episode, we break down the psychology of solo travelling, including: What personality traits make a good solo traveller Why are we so drawn to solo travelling The 4 major psychological benefits of solo travelling in our 20s The most common challenges we face when solo travelling How to overcome those challenges The post solo travelling hangover and much more Listen now! PREORDER MY BOOK: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/755841/person-in-progress-by-jemma-sbeg/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
41:0715/11/2024
247. Can we be friends with our ex?
A lot of us try to convince ourselves we can be friends with our ex in the immediate aftermath of a breakup, but is that necesserily the best idea? In 2022 I did an episode with my ex-boyfriend talking about how a friendship was totally possible, well since then it is obvious to say that I have changed my mind, and in this episode I give my reasons, including: Why we (mistakedly) try to stay friends with our exes The types of relationships where this feels possible The consequences How it impacts our new relationships, self esteem, and ability to find closure How to be friends with an ex if you MUST BE Essential boundaries for a friendship with your ex This episode is the only time I have redone/revised an episode so we hope you enjoy. PREORDER MY BOOK: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/755841/person-in-progress-by-jemma-sbeg/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
41:0412/11/2024
246. How to cope with political anxiety
Many of us have been facing increasing levels of political anxiety in the past days and weeks. It seems that the world has never been more divisive and polarised and there is a lot that we are uncertain and fearful of. In today’s episode we talk about how we can acknowledge that the future feels scary, but still find an internal sense of safety and peace, including: The value of stoic principles and focusing on what you can control The psychology of a strong belief system The power of staying present and grounding ourselves Overcoming doomscrolling and being informed but not overwhelmed How to talk about politics in a healthy way I know this time feels very scary and uncertain but I hope this tiny slice of the internet makes you feel safe and seen, love Jemma. PREORDER MY BOOK: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/755841/person-in-progress-by-jemma-sbeg/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
36:1708/11/2024
245, The psychology of the middle child
We all know the stereotypes about the eldest child, the youngest and the only child, but the middle child often seems to be left out, and not just from our conversations on birth order theory, but also seemingly from the family sometimes. In today's episode, we putting a spotlight on the middle children, including how their position in the family makes them so agreeable, why they often become the conflict mediators, and how this can build resentment later in life. We also discuss why middle children feel so unseen, but also are the most independent, how they behave in friendships, relationships, in the workplace, and what happens when there are multiple middle children, as well as how to reparent your middle child. Listen now! PREORDER MY BOOK: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/755841/person-in-progress-by-jemma-sbeg/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
43:0404/11/2024
244. 5 steps for creating a 'soft life'
The idea of a 'soft life' originated from a group of Nigerian influencers who chose the term to describe a way of living that was comfortable, joyful, minimised stress whilst prioritised self care and simple beauty, in comparison to hustle culture, burnout and urgency. In today's episode we are going to go through 5 practical tips to make this gentle life your reality, including: The 'Picture This' exercise The new way to approach your To Do list How to organically regulate your nervous system Creation over consumption Rethinking our ideas for success I also have a special announcement at the beginning of the episode! Thank you again for all the support. Preorder my book here: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/755841/person-in-progress-by-jemma-sbeg/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:4601/11/2024
243. Why having hobbies is so important
Your hobbies may be just as important as your friendships in your 20s. But whilst you may dedicate 10-15 hours a week to your friends, most of us can go a week or two without actually performing our hobbies. Why is that, and what is the consequence?In today's episode we break down the psychology of why our hobbies are so important, including: The debate around what makes a hobby How many hobbies do you actually need? How much time should you spend doing your hobbies? The Rule of Four for hobbies The psychological benefits The 3 major reasons we struggle to perform our hobbies How to find time, inspiration and motivation for your hobbies, and more Listen now if you want to make more of your leisure time! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:2329/10/2024
242. The psychology of maladaptive daydreaming
Daydreaming can be a perfectly normal part of life - zoning out in the shower, before we fall asleep, on the train to work. But some of us cross over into dangerous territory or what we call maladaptive daydreaming where we can't pull ourselves away from the fantasy. We feel disconnected and it makes our real life feel so much less bright and enjoyable. It can cause us a lot of distress and distraction. Why is that? And why can't we stop ourselves? In today's episode, we break down: What makes daydreaming 'maladaptive' or 'excessive' What are the signs + the 16 item scale for maladaptive daydreaming The impact on our emotional health Maladaptive daydreaming and creativity Maladaptive daydreaming, trauma, anxiety and OCD Is daydreaming a form of escapism? How to turn daydreaming into intentional visualisation Thank you to our listeners who contributed their perspective. Happy listening! The 16 item scale here: https://traumadissociation.com/mds The Reddit help group: https://www.reddit.com/r/MaladaptiveDreaming/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
41:0125/10/2024
241. Are we our own worst critic?
Sometimes the loudest critic, our biggest hater is not someone we know, it is ourselves. We are the ones who are the first to judge ourselves, to shut ourselves and our ambitions down, to say the nastiest things. In today's episode we break down why we are our own worst critic, including: How we learn self criticism in childhood The evolutionary component to criticism The role of the super ego The role of comparison Why no one is really looking at your that closely How to embrace radical self compassion and acceptance How to use cognitive diffusion, and much more This episode is a rerun whilst Jemma is recovering from an illness. We will be back on Friday with a brand new episode. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
38:3122/10/2024
240. Overcoming dating burnout
In our 20s it can feel like a mad rush to find the one. If you are single and dating, you know the experience of going on what seems like dozens of dates only to be disappointed and, at the end of the day, exhausted and yet you still haven't found someone. In this episode, we discuss why that is including: The signs your experiencing dating burnout What dating burnout and traditional burnout have in common The role of swipe based dating apps Why this occurs and the emotional impact The psychology of a 'dating detox' How to have FUN when dating and how to overcome dating burnout Listen now if nothing seems to be working when it comes too feeling frustrated and exhausted when it comes to dating in your 20s. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:1917/10/2024
239. What is the 'loneliest' chapter of our 20s?
At some stage in our 20s, all of us will experience what I call 'The Loneliest Chapter' - a period where we feel detached, disconnected and isolated. Whilst this experience can feel terrible and make us question our relationships, friendships and selves, it's an important rite of passage and actually ends up teaching us a lot. In today's episode we discuss: What is the 'lonely' chapter of our 20s? My personal journey with loneliness What are some signs you may be in it, right now? Why does this occur? What creates this period? How can we learn to tolerate and enjoy solitude? What are the benefits of loneliness? How can we make new friends and feel like we belong? All of that, and more... Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:0114/10/2024
238. High functioning codependency and caring too much ft. Terri Cole
What is the cost of caring too much for others? Always being the person to fix everyone's problems? Never needing anyone, but secretly loving that everyone else relies on you? Well, it turns out it can cost you and your relationships a lot, and may also be a sign of high functioning codependency. High functioning codependency is much more common amongst people who are overachieving, overgiving and who have few boundaries (even if they don't know it). In today's episode, we are joined by the originator of this term. Terri Cole is a psychotherapist and boundary expert who has been investigating this phenomena for years in her high functioning and highly successful clients. She shares the traits, behaviours, costs and ways to improve your high functioning codependency. This was one of my favourite episodes to date, happy listening! Buy Terri's new book here: https://www.soundstrue.com/products/too-much?srsltid=AfmBOor1-0MHrQayS-ZdUANvTC5qC-T4e1Bpxotu8cti1CqOVVizKO17 Follow Terri here: @terricole Terri's resources: https://www.terricole.com/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
44:3511/10/2024
237. The psychology of shame
Shame follows us everywhere. So many of us are bound by shame about our past, our mistakes, our identity, our looks, our decisions and choices. This can make living a meaningful and fulfilling life incredibly difficult when you have your own personal, shame bully following you everywhere. In todays episode we learn: How shame gets implanted in us The links between shame and trauma Shame vs. guilt How shame manifests in hidden ways What a life without shame could look like? How to release shame by communicating with your inner child How to shut down shame spirals My own personal story of body shaming Listen now! I hope this releases you from the heavy burden of shame. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:5708/10/2024
236. How to make hard decisions
At some stage in our 20s we'll have to make a life changing decision where the right choice is not at all clear: stay or leave my job, the country, my relationships? We can become paralysed in that moment, unable to take a step forward, not realising that doing nothing is, in itself, a decision. In today's episode we break down: Why we struggle to make hard decisions The paradox of choice Indecisiveness and a lack of self trust The 'Wisest Self' thought exercise The 10/10/10 rule for making hard decisions The role of regret and fear Listen now if you're struggling with some hard choices in your 20s! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:3604/10/2024
235. The psychology of 'right person, wrong time'
The right person at the wrong time might be one of the saddest kinds of love stories we come across. This person may be perfect for us, our dream partner, but factors like distance, life, obligations, emotional readiness get in the way and mean that we can't be together. Despite knowing we can't be together, we can't let go and pine after this person, wondering what we could have done differently. Or is right person, wrong time, actually just a myth? Is there ever such a thing as the 'wrong time' for our soulmate? In this episode we discuss: The obstacles that keep people apart The psychology of 'right person, wrong time' The cognitive biases that keep us attached to someone Why we feel more bonded with some people over others Why 'right person, wrong time' may be a myth How to get over this person you can't stop thinking about Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
41:1030/09/2024
234. I had a mental breakdown
Let's talk about what's been going on with my mental health recently and what's changed. This is a rather vulnerable episode so please check in with yourself before listening. Lifeline (AUS): 13 11 14 National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (US): 988 Samaritans (UK): 116 123 Mental health resources (worldwide): https://www.helpguide.org/find-help Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:0727/09/2024
233. Surviving a toxic workplace
Work makes up a large component of our lives. It's estimated that 1/3 of our waking lives will be spent working, so when that environment is toxic or harmful, it takes it's toll. Especially in our 20s, a toxic workplace can be quite a negative, formative experience and leave us with poor confidence, imposter syndrome and chronic burnout. In today's episode we discuss the psychological impact of bad jobs, including: The burnout cycle Psychological enmeshment with a workplace Long term impact on self esteem and future employment Tips for surviving a toxic workplace Tips on how to thrive afterwards, despite the trauma I also share my own lived experience with a toxic workplace and what I wish I'd known before. Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
45:0224/09/2024
232. Why do we hate criticism?
When someone criticises us we naturally feel on edge and defensive. This is because criticism threatens our ego and our sense of self and so we have a very emotional reaction. But that doesn't have to be the case. In today's episode, we break down: What makes us so sensitive to criticism Hypercritical parenting and an aversion to feedback Rejection sensitivity and criticism The differences between criticism and feedback How to properly approach criticism When the criticism isn't worth your time All of that and more as we unpack the psychology behind criticism. Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:5820/09/2024
231. 5 ways to reinvent yourself in your 20s
If nothing else, our 20s are a time for reinvention and transformation. We become clearer and clearer about the version of us we want to be, and hopefully more confident around expressing our authentic elves, but sometimes this is interrupted by periods of boredom, stagnation, isolation and discomfort. These are all signs that something in our lives needs to change, and it needs to change now. In today's episode we break down five ways to reinvent yourself during your 20s, including: Theory of opposites Visualisation and choosing the 'theme' for your next era The timeline for change The power of risk + microrisks Changing 'what if' thinking into 'what else' or 'so what?' + more Listen now when you're ready for transformation. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
40:1617/09/2024
230. The psychology of flirting
Flirting! Usually thought of as something used to express romantic or physical interest may actually be the secret to unlocking more connections than you can ever imagine: platonic and romantic. In today's episode we break down the psychology of flirting, including how to gain confidence in your flirting ability, the flirt languages or styles, why flirting is all about connection and low expectations and, of course, how to bring back flirting into a long term relationship. We are joined by the Flirt Coach, Benjamin Camras, to be the expert on this episode. Benjamin has been a flirt coach for thousands, runs his own podcast on flirting, called Flirtations, and gives us his best tips and tricks for embracing the power of the 'flirt'. Listen now! Follow Benjamin here: @benjamincamras Listen to Flirtations here: https://open.spotify.com/show/3Ti023cM762SVaQOZrdWlv?si=4ab574c92b5f4339 Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
41:5512/09/2024
229. 4 ways to make your anxiety work for you
We all get anxious at times, but what we forget in those moments is that anxiety is just there to protect us, it's trying to do its job, and the more we lean in and play along, the more we start to feel in control again. In today's episode, we break down the four ways I've made my anxiety work for me, including: Turning anxiety into excitement The certainities list method The personification method Channeling anxious energy into creative energy + more If you're someone who struggles with ongoing anxiety, this episode will hopefully provide you with a new perspective, or at least a refresher on what we do know about the way anxiety effects us. Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
30:1010/09/2024
228. The psychology of limerence
Limerance - the state of having undeniable feelings for someone who does not feel the same way - feels so much like love but can be so confusing, because deep down we know this person is probably not the one. Despite that we find it impossible to move on, impossible to disconnect or detach despite our best efforts because our affections for this person feel so permanently wired into our brain. Today we talk about why that may be, including: The first ever studies into limerance The 4 stages of limerance The addictive explanation for limerance Limerance, attachment style, fantasy and ADHD What the long term emotional impacts of limerance are How to recover + 4 tips for moving on Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:1506/09/2024
227. The power of staying present
Our attention is constantly being pulled in every direction: we're thinking about the past, overthinking the future, getting notifications from our phones, information from our environment. When was the last time you truly slowed down and enjoyed the present? When was the last time you savoured the moment like you do a nice meal, or a sleep in? Today we are discussing the power of mindfulness, and the power of staying present, including: The three biggest enemies to staying present The psychology of disassocation The psychological benefits of living in the moment What the world's biggest happiness study says about staying present The 3x3x3 mindfulness method Embracing your 'romance' moments, and more Listen now to learn about the art of noticing, staying present, and feeling life fully. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:5703/09/2024
226. How money impacts our mental health
Money is as much psychological and emotional as it is a physical resource. For that reason, sometimes money and our mental health don't always mix. Many people think that we only experience financial anxiety or financial stress when we are struggling with money, but it turns out that it's a lot more complicated than that. In today's episode, we break down the interactions between our psychology and our mental health, including: The difference between objective and subjective financial stress The long term impacts of worrying about money Why this generation is more concerned with money than ever before Our 9 money languages or archetypes and how to identify yours How to manage financial stress in your 20s How to override your financial impulses and poor money decisions All of that and so much more! Listen now. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
52:0430/08/2024
225. Overcome your fear of being perceived
Our fear of being perceived is more than just social anxiety, its a real phobia around being scrutinised, observed and primarily judged by others. It's also greatly limiting your potential and ability to be your true self. But there is a way through, there is a way to escape the constant fixation on what others are thinking about you. In today's episode, we discuss: The origins and effects of scopophobia How our fear of being perceived is both a social and specific phobia Why do we worry about what other people think? Perfectionism and our fear of being perceived The impact of early childhood experiences Three mental shifts to overcome your fear of being perceived Listen now for all that and more! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
43:0626/08/2024
224. 5 ways to support someone with their mental health
Loving someone who struggles with their mental health can be devastating. You want to do all you can to help, but no one has ever taught you how or what exactly you should say, how you can help, the right questions to ask. In today's episode we break down the biggest pieces of advice I have for people who are supporting someone they love with their mental health from education, to understanding our processing languages, listening, advocating and setting boundaries! Listen now. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:2323/08/2024
223. Why are female friendships so hard?
In today's episode we break down the controversy but also the beauty of female friendship - why exactly are they so difficult? Or is that all a myth? It turns out what makes female friendships sometimes so difficult is also what makes them so rewarding - the intensity, the level of disclosure, the expectations, the bond! We also discuss how society tries to undermine the sacred nature of female friendship through competition, comparison and the cursed role of male attention, but also how to ensure healthy, long lasting connections with your girlfriends. A big thank you to the listeners who contributed to this episode! Listen now. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
43:5220/08/2024
222. Am I too sensitive?
The life of the highly sensitive person is often misunderstood. Highly sensitive aren't just people who cry too much or get overwhelmed, take things too personally: they actually take in so much of the world that it can be too much. They feel everything, from joy to sadness, so immediately and profoundly. They are also so in tune with the emotions of all those around them that sometimes it can be too much. Today we break down the psychology of the highly sensitive person, including: What are the core assessment criteria for identifying if you're highly sensitive? What causes someone to be highly sensitive? The genetic, personality, parental and temperment contribution The link between sensitivity, IQ, EQ and creativity + the gentle superpower of sensitive people Do highly sensitive people have more empathy? The link between neurodivergence and sensitivity How to explain your sensitivity to others How to make the world work for your gentle, feeling soul, and so much more! This episode is FULL of tips, research and studies. Listen now! The assessment: https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
46:4015/08/2024
221. How to be truly successful in your 20s
This episode might be the wakeup call we all need that our traditional notions of success aren't working. We have been conditioned to see success as individualistic, full of sacrifice, centred around discipline, productivity and all about image and looking impressive. Actually, success is a lot more nuanced. Some of the most successful people in the world as the least happy because success does not allow us to prioritise what really matters to us and drives us. In this episode we break down: The problems with our idea of success Overachiever burnout Why being successful doesn't always equal happiness The alternative and how to find your purpose What makes a successful life in your 20s Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
39:2013/08/2024
220. The psychology of nostalgia and getting stuck in the past
All of us find ourselves remincising on the 'good old days' every now and then, but sometimes we can find ourselves getting trapped in the memories of the past and feeling like it will never be as good as it was. This is the nostalgia trap and it can keep us from being present, from enjoying our current season, or making new memories, it can also lead to nostalgic depression. It can be particulalry hard in our 20s when everyone is telling us these are 'the best years of our lives'. In today's episode we talk about how to find a healthy balance between remembering and enjoying the moment, including: Early ideas of nostalgia The reason we feel nostalgia Are we more nostalgic now than ever? Can we have too much nostalgia? Peter Pan Syndrome Chronic and depressive nostalgia How to be more present + tips for managing our nostalgia Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:5009/08/2024
219. The psychology of journalling
Journalling is seen as one of the holy grails when it comes to trying to improve your mental health and emotional wellbeing, but what about it is so great? The people who love it, absolutely swear by it, but where do we even begin? How can we make it less like a chore, and more joyous? In today's episode, we break down the psychology and fundamentals of journalling, including: The history of journalling and writing therapy The physical, mental and emotional benefits How to find the right journalling technique for you The benefits of 'ugly' journalling Why journalling can be so difficult to start The FOUR fundamental principles for enjoying journalling My favourite journalling prompts Alternatives when writing isn't your thing Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
40:2405/08/2024
218. Overcome your fear of never finding love
Our fear of being alone forever and never finding the right one is scary, but it's also pretty natural. Whether you have never dated before, or are worried that you have missed your chance for true, long term love, it can be hard to imagine ourselves finding the right person without getting really caught up in the dating process. Today, let's talk about how to overcome your fear of being alone or ending up single, including: The fear of missing out The impact of social pain The societal narrative towards singlehood Single shaming language + the role of ambiguous loss Does a fear of being alone make us less selective? How to be self partnered and actually LOVE it! All of that and some much more! Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
40:2502/08/2024
217. How to find your calling
One of the biggest questions we seem to encounter in our 20s and beyond is: what is my calling? What is my purpose, my mission, my passion? So many of us are left feeling panicked and like we are wasting time looking for the answer. Shouldn't this be obvious? Shouldn't I know by now? Actually, finding your purpose is not as simple as it looks, but in today's episode we dive into the Japanese concept of Ikigai: What are you good at? What do you love doing? What does the world need? What can you get paid for? We break down exactly to find your answer to each of these elements and hopefully feel closer to your calling + 3 bonus exercises for finding more clarity on what drives you. Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbe Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
36:2330/07/2024
216. The psychology of resentment
Resentment is sometimes labelled as an ugly or bad emotion, something that is derived from a sense of entitlement. In actuality, resentment is a really useful emotion, it serves as an emotional alarm, it teaches us what we value, and it can help us understand our own expectations and sense of self worth even more. Despite that, when we don't manage our resentment well it can also come to harm our relationships or cause us to be too rash. In today's episode, we break down the psychology of resentment, including: Why we experience resentment What you resentment may be telling you Our 3 ways to respond to resentment How to release resentment and move through it Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
36:2026/07/2024
215. Are you living in survival mode?
Survival mode is, at its core, a stress response. When our minds and our bodies are put under extreme stress or believe we are in danger, we can enter a state where all we care about is getting through the next day. This can turn us into a person we're not and make us lose the enjoyment and love for life, but also feel overwhelmed by constant panic and anxiety. In today's episode, we discuss how to break free of survival mode, the difference between our learning brain and our survival brain, why we find ourselves here to begin with, what's happening in our brain and our bodies and the best advice, tips and therapies for getting back into safe mode. Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
41:0423/07/2024
214. The secret to love? Go SLOW ft. Therapist Moe Ari Brown
We all want long lasting, passionate, meaningful love and in our 20s it can hard to figure out exactly how to find that. With so many 'rules' around what to do, pacing, when to become exclusive, when to say 'I love you', when to move in together, it seems the secret is to go slow and build emotional intimacy. In other words, embrace the power of the slow burn, the 'slowmance' and low pressure beginnings. In this episode we are joined by Hinge's Love & Connection Expert, Moe Ari Brown as they discuss how to slow down and properly build a foundation for sustainable love, why we can often be overwhelmed by the need to speed things up and jump right in, ignoring intuition out of our fear of rejection, and where that can lead us. That and so (SO) much more. Listen now! Follow Moe here: @loveoutproud View the new Hinge report: https://hinge.co/press/2024-GenZ-Report Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast here: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
49:1218/07/2024
213. The psychology of play
Is the secret to a happier, less stressful, more connected life actually play? A lot of the research is telling us so! As we get older sometimes we lose a bit of our joy, awe and wonder, and the time we have for our friendships becomes more restricted by work, obligations, distance, commitment and seriousness. In today's episode, let's talk about why the solution to that may be to bring back adult playdates, including: The psychology behind why play is important The loneliness epidemic Why our sense of connection has become disrupted Our 8 play personalities The power of parallel play Microhabits for creating playfulness and fun, and so much more! Listen now! And don't forget to schedule your playdate!! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:2516/07/2024
212. The psychology of self doubt
Our self doubts are what is keeping us in our own way. It is the foundation for our inner critic to tell us: you're not good enough, you're not talented enough, intelligent beautiful, hardworking to have the life and success you want. When we let our self doubts take control, it often means that we end up self handicapping or sabotaging before we get to the start line. In today's episode we are going to talk about the psychology of self doubt and how to silence those false beliefs, including: The origin of false beliefs in childhood experiences The impact of bullying on adult identity Overcoming failure and setbacks Imposter syndrome + self sabotage The power of a persona + the batman effect Doubting your own doubts Asking 'why not you?', and so much more Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquires: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:1413/07/2024
211. The problem with 'toxic' positivity
Today on the podcast we are talking about toxic positivity and the problem with always being positive and putting a fluffy, warm, positive spin on things. Often our unrealistic optimism comes from a good place and our desire to be happy all the time but any person knows that isn't always possible. We break down: The reason we gravitate towards toxic positivity What toxic positivity looks like The impact of wellness and self help content The consequences for our mental health The consequences for our emotional intelligence Why people who accept negative emotions are ACTUALLY happier How to practice emotional acceptance and healthy positivity All of that and so much more, listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:4609/07/2024
210. The 5 BIGGEST red flags for relationships in our 20s
We all know what red flags are, they tend to be universal at any age, but there are some redflags that are specific to our 20s, certain features of a relationship during this decade to look out for even if they don't look concerning at first. On today's episode we talk about the five biggest red flags for relationships in our 20s, including: Relationships that stop you from having experiences Relationships that cause emotional chaos Relationships that don't celebrate or encourage you All or nothing relationships Fatal attractor relationships We also explore the psychology and of course the research behind why these can be so damaging to help us find more sustainable and healthy love during this decade. Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
33:0005/07/2024
209. Navigating post-graduation blues ft. Therapist Liz Kelly
The period after graduation can be really difficult, filled with emotions like grief, anxiety, worry about the future, loneliness and nostalgia as we leave the structure and comfort of college and university for the big, confusing real world. In today's episode we break down the psychology of the post-graduation blues, including: What defines this experience How long does it last? The loss of friends as well as security and stability What triggers our unease How we can embrace the fear and uncertainty Setting realistic goals for our first year post graduation This and so much more, all with some amazing advice and wisdom from our guest, the therapist Liz Kelly, author of the book 'This Book Is Cheaper Than Therapy'. Listen now! Buy Liz book here: https://www.amazon.com.au/This-Book-Cheaper-Than-Therapy/dp/1962305007 Follow Jemma here: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast here: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:1702/07/2024
208. Let's talk about coping mechanisms
Very few of us ever receive an education on coping. We are taught bad things happen, we are taught pointless math equations, we are taught to grin and bear it, but not effective psychological ways of integrating stressful, painful, frustrating experiences. In this episode, we break down the psychology of coping mechanisms, including: Problem focused vs. emotion focused coping Maladaptive vs. adaptive coping Our most common defence mechanisms How to stop numbing ourselves to our experiences How to consciously deal with hard things in life Our coping statements Freud, Carl Jung and many more Listen now for a comprehensive deep dive into coping in your 20s and beyond. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
43:0328/06/2024
207. How to have better conversations
Conversations seem like they should be the easiest thing in the world, but we all know that sometimes that is not the case! Mental distractions, running out of things to talk about, feeling a bit off, all some of the roadblocks we face. In today's episode we break down FIVE tips to have better conversations: The 2:1 question ratio The fast friends protocol Story topping and bright siding The 5 minute urge The liking gap Listen now for more so we can all be having better conversations in whatever area of life! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
28:4125/06/2024
206. The psychology of love bombing
Love bombing has been a hot topic as of recent, but what does it ACTUALLY mean or entail? In today's episode we are breaking down all of the psychology of love bombing, including: The cultish origin of love bombing The three stages of love bombing Why people love bomb? The interaction between narcissism and love bombing Intensity addiction and love bombing The five questions for determining: is it love or lovebombing? We also dive into why it can be so easy to get swept up by these individuals and behaviours, how to know it when you see it and the strength it takes to walk away. Listen now! For online help: https://whiteribbon.org.au/helplines/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
32:3321/06/2024
205. A mental health update
Since the beginning of this show I've been super open about my mental health so I thought I'd share an update (the bad, the good and the really good). Let's normalise talking openly and honestly about what we're going through even when its not pretty or aesthetic. Thank you for all the support! Mental Health support in your area: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
38:0318/06/2024
204. Should we be thinking about kids in our 20s?
The thought of having children in our 20s feels like an incredibly adult decision, and is one a lot of us probably don't consider. We want to protect our youth and our freedom a little bit longer, or perhaps have decided we probably will never want children. But whether you want to have children or not, having a clear understanding of your future intentions or choices, your reproductive health, the kind of person who might make a good partner, and therefore parent, is important. More information, more foresight actually equals greater freedom and sometimes time to decide. We break down: Why you should be thinking in your 20s The pros and cons of having children in your 20s The argument for NOT having children Fertility Milestone anxiety and the pressure to find someone Your stories of pregnancy, parenthood and fertility in your 20s Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business enquiries: [email protected] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
29:4214/06/2024
203. Why do we feel so unloveable?
Struggling with our self worth can often impact how deserving we feel of love. This sense that we may be 'unloveable' causes us to miss out on healthy, fulfilling relationships, self sabotage and stay with people who don't deserve us. In today's episode, we discuss: The origins of why we feel unworthy of love Childhood wounds Early romantic scripts and teen romance Repeated rejection and shame The consequences of feeling unloveable Repetition of toxic relationships How to restore or rediscover your sense of self worth and self love And so much more. Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:3211/06/2024
202. Body dysmorphia
All of us have insecurities when it comes to our appearance, but what happens when these become obsessive and a point of fixation? In today's episode we break down the psychology and pathology of body dysmorphia, including: The origins in childhood experiences Family history and influence The differences in expression between men and women The relationship between body dysmorphia and cosmetic surgery The influence of toxic gym, diet culture and 'bigorexia' How false beliefs influence behaviour Dating with body dysmorphia, and more Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
47:5607/06/2024
201. 5 scientific ways to ACTUALLY be happier
We all want to be happier, but are probably sick of hearing about 'exercising more, eating better, sleeping 8 hours'. In today's episode we break down FIVE evidence based tips that are simple, accessible, actionable and inexpensive for becoming a happier person and the research that proves it: Focus on platonic love over romantic love Small acts of kindness + how we are spending our money wrong and why its making us less happy The importance of a project The healing power of nature + what bacteria and dirt have to do with it Let yourself wallow Listen now! Buy notebooks here: https://the-psychology-of-your-20s.myshopify.com/ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast Instagram here: @thatpsychologypodcast See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
41:5204/06/2024