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The Art of Manliness
The Art of Manliness Podcast aims to deepen and improve every area of a man's life, from fitness and philosophy, to relationships and productivity. Engaging and edifying interviews with some of the world's most interesting doers and thinkers drop the fluff and filler to glean guests' very best, potentially life-changing, insights.
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Rich Mind vs. Poor Mind — A Psychologist’s Guide to Building Wealth

Rich Mind vs. Poor Mind — A Psychologist’s Guide to Building Wealth

Many people think becoming wealthy is all about having the right job, inheritance, or just lucky breaks. And those things can certainly give you a leg up. But according to my guest, the biggest key to building wealth is your mindset, as research shows that even high earners can stay broke forever if they’re trapped in poor thinking patterns, while others can build lasting wealth on modest incomes by developing the right mental approach.Dr. Brad Klontz is a financial psychologist, wealth manager, and professor, and the co-author of Start Thinking Rich: 21 Harsh Truths to Take You from Broke to Financial Freedom. Today on the show, Brad explains the critical difference between being broke and being poor, how learned helplessness keeps people financially stuck, and practical ways to develop an agentic, wealth-building mindset. We also tackle thorny issues like the role of homeownership in building wealth and how to handle relationships that might be holding back your financial future.Resources Related to the PodcastBrad‘s previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #529 — The Money Scripts That Are Holding Back Your Financial FutureAoM Podcast #321: How to Think About MoneyAoM Podcast #536: How to Achieve a “Rich Life” With Your FinancesAoM Article: Taking Control of Your LifeAoM Article: Avoiding Learned HelplessnessAoM Article: A Young Man’s Guide to Understanding Retirement Accounts — IRAsCompound Interest Calculator Connect With BradKlontzStart Thinking Rich website Brad‘s website
40:1325/11/2024
Tribal Runners, Weekend Warriors, and Our Changing Relationship to Endurance Sports

Tribal Runners, Weekend Warriors, and Our Changing Relationship to Endurance Sports

Endurance activities, like distance running, have existed since ancient times. But humans' relationship to those pursuits has changed, according to time and place. In the West, we've currently turned endurance sports into a science — tracking every metric and chasing personal records through sophisticated technology and personalized training plans. But as my guest, who's spent years studying the running cultures in different societies, knows well, this modern, individualized, data-driven approach isn't the only way to pursue the art of endurance.Michael Crawley is a competitive runner, social anthropologist, and the author of To the Limit. On the show today, we first examine how Western athletes have "workified" running through technology and social media. We then look at how other cultures approach running differently, including why East African runners emphasize group training over individual goals and how the Rarámuri people of Mexico incorporate spiritual dimensions into their running. We end our conversation with how we might rediscover more meaningful, holistic ways to approach our own physical pastimes.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #1,021: You Were Born to RunBorn to Run by Christopher McDougallConnect With Michael CrawleyMichael on XMichael on IGMichael's faculty page
51:0020/11/2024
What's Behind the Rise of Parent-Child Estrangement?

What's Behind the Rise of Parent-Child Estrangement?

These days, you hear more and more about parents and adult children being estranged from each other. Some individuals have even decided to go "no contact" with their parents; they don't want anything to do with their mom and/or dad at all.To understand what's behind this phenomenon, today I talk to Joshua Coleman, a psychologist who's spent 40 years counseling families and the author of Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict. Joshuagoes beyond the typical one-sided narratives around parent-child estrangement that tell the story of parents who got what they deserved or overly entitled adult children who wrongly blame their parents, to unpack the larger cultural context for why these tensions have arisen. We discuss how society has moved from upholding a honor-thy-father-and-mother sense of obligation to prioritizing individuality and optionality, and why despite the fact that we're more child-focused and psychologically aware than ever, familial estrangements are on the rise. We get into the common reasons for estrangement, the role that expanding ideas of what constitutes abuse and trauma and an adult child's therapist can play in it, and how much parents can really be blamed for how their kids turn out. And we get into what parents who are estranged from their children can do to reconcile with them. Even if you're not personally estranged from a family member, the discussion of the underlying dynamics influencing all our modern relationships is a fascinating one.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #788: The Dangers of “Concept Creep”AoM Podcast #873: The Myths of TraumaConnect With Joshua ColemanJoshua's website
56:0718/11/2024
The Art and Spirituality of Bread

The Art and Spirituality of Bread

Think about a hot loaf of bread fresh out of the oven.There's a lot going on with that loaf.On one level, it's a literal food that's been created through chemical processes. A delicious — your mouth might be watering right now — form of sustenance.But there's also more to it than that. There's something about bread, the so-called staff of life, that's different from other foods and resonates on a deeper level. There's a reason bread has been a rich symbol throughout times and cultures and figures prominently in religious scriptures.Today on the show, Peter Reinhart will take us on an exploration of the many facets of bread, from the spiritual to the scientific. Peter is a baker, educator, and the author of numerous books, including The Bread Baker's Apprentice: Mastering the Art of Extraordinary Bread. In the first half of our conversation, Peter unpacks the deeper, mystical meanings of bread by walking us through the twelve steps of how it's made. We then get into why sourdough is the future and final frontier of bread, and the technical secrets to mixing, fermenting, and baking a killer loaf.Resources Related to the PodcastPeter's booksPeter's recipes for overnight fermented lean dough and morePeter's TED talkAoM Article: Bread Baking 101 for BeginnersConnect With Peter ReinhartPeter's Pizza Quest website
01:04:0413/11/2024
An Undercover Cop’s Tips on How to Influence Others and Navigate Life

An Undercover Cop’s Tips on How to Influence Others and Navigate Life

It’s not uncommon for former law enforcement officers and intelligence agents to write self-help books where they share how the lessons they learned in their professional careers can apply to people in any walk of life.What is rare is for one of these officers-turned-authors to publicly prove they know what they’re talking about and that their tips work, as Derrick Levasseur did by winning the reality show Big Brother.Derrick is a former undercover detective, current private investigator, and the author of The Undercover Edge: Find Your Hidden Strengths, Learn to Adapt, and Build the Confidence to Win Life’s Game. Today on the show, Derrick shares how he became an undercover police officer, what he learned from that job, how he applied those lessons on Big Brother, and how you can use similar techniques to influence others, know when someone is lying, and bounce back from adversity.Resources Related to the PodcastDerrick’s season of Big BrotherDerrick’s podcastsCrime WeeklyDetective Perspective The Johari WindowAoM Podcast #830: How to Read Minds and Detect DeceptionConnect With Derrick LevasseurDerrick’s websiteDerrick on IGDerrick on YouTube
46:3611/11/2024
When to Eat — The Optimal Schedule for Metabolic Health

When to Eat — The Optimal Schedule for Metabolic Health

When it comes to weight management and all-around good metabolic health, we most often think about what to eat. But my guest would say that it's also crucial to think about when to eat,Emily Manoogian is a chronobiologist and clinical researcher at the Salk Institute for Biological Studies. Today on the show, Emily shares how to create an optimal schedule for a healthy metabolism by aligning your eating schedule with your circadian rhythm. She explains when to start eating after waking, when to stop eating before bed, the importance of sticking to a set schedule, and what happens to your metabolism when you don't follow these timing guidelines. We also talk about how to best distribute your calorie intake throughout the day and how to eat to mitigate the metabolic problems that come with being a shift worker.Resources Related to the PodcastThe Salk InstituteMy Circadian Clock appAoM Podcast #1,016: Unlock Better Sleep and Health by Harnessing Your Circadian RhythmConnect with Emily ManoogianEmily on LinkedInEmily on X
40:4806/11/2024
A Bible for Heroes — The Influential Book Read By History's Eminent Men

A Bible for Heroes — The Influential Book Read By History's Eminent Men

In 18th century America, this book was second in popularity only to the Bible.It was a favorite of many thinkers and leaders throughout history, including Emerson, Napoleon, Machiavelli, Nietzsche, and even President Truman.Yet, you probably haven't read it.It's Plutarch's Parallel Lives.If you're not familiar with Plutarch's Lives, you're in for a treat, as today's episode offers a great intro. My guest, Alex Petkas, found that even though he's a former classicist and professor, Plutarch's Lives is still a tough read, which is why he started a podcast, The Cost of Glory, to make it more accessible to people. He does the same thing on today's episode, sharing the background on Plutarch's set of biographies and its major themes. Alex explains why Plutarch thought that biography was a powerful way to transmit morals and how the Homeric virtue he had in mind differed from that of just having good, upstanding character. Alex then gives us a taste of Plutarch as we discuss the lives of two obscure Greek and Roman figures. We end our conversation with how to get started studying Plutarch yourself.Resources Related to the PodcastCost of Glory websiteAlex's resource on how to read Plutarch's Lives, with links to the mentioned Penguin editionsAlex's recommended episodes of the Cost of Glory podcast:Pompey I: Kid ButcherCrassus I: Richest Man in RomeAoM Article: An Intro to EnvyAoM Article: Envy, Ressentiment, and the Inversion of ValuesAoM Podcast #949: Unpacking The Emotion No One Likes to Talk AboutSullaEumenesSertoriusBlood and Thunder: The Epic Story of Kit Carson and the Conquest of the American West by Hampton Sides + AoM podcast episode about the bookConnect with Alex PetkasAlex on LinkedInAlex on XAlex on IG
52:5104/11/2024
Are You a Thrill Seeker or a Chill Seeker?

Are You a Thrill Seeker or a Chill Seeker?

This episode starts off a little differently than others — with a short quiz, something called the Brief Sensation-Seeking Scale, which will tell you whether you're what psychologists call a high sensation-seeker or a low sensation-seeker. Read the following eight statements, and then pick a number from 1 to 5 that corresponds to your level of agreement, where 1 is "Not at all like me," 2 is "Not like me," 3 is "Unsure or both like and not like me," 4 is "Like me," and 5 is "Very much like me."I would like to explore strange places.I would like to take off on a trip with no pre-planned routes or timetables.I get restless when I spend too much time alone.I prefer friends who are excitingly unpredictable.I like wild parties.I would love to have new and exciting experiences, even if they are illegal.I would like to try bungee jumping.I would like to do frightening things.Now add up all the numbers together. If you scored between 8 and 16, you are a low sensation-seeker. If you scored between 16 and 28, you're about average for sensation-seeking. If you scored over 28, you're a high sensation-seeker.Today on the show, I unpack what these categories of personality mean with Dr. Kenneth Carter, a clinical psychologist, a professor, and the author of Buzz!: Inside the Minds of Thrill-Seekers, Daredevils, and Adrenaline Junkies. Ken explains how sensation-seeking exists on a spectrum between chill seekers, who like safety and calm routine, and thrill seekers, who enjoy chaos, risk, and novelty. He shares how there are actually four components to high sensation-seeking, and which two tend to get people in trouble. And we talk about whether being high or low sensation-seeking is a matter of nature or nurture, how high sensation-seekers fare in romantic relationships and what they should consider in choosing a career, and what the world's chill seekers can learn from its thrill seekers.Resources Related to the Podcast40-Question Sensation-Seeking Scale TestConnect with Ken CarterKen's websiteKen on IGKen on XKen's faculty page
32:2530/10/2024
Ouch! That Stings! Why Rejection Hurts So Much (And How to Deal With It)

Ouch! That Stings! Why Rejection Hurts So Much (And How to Deal With It)

“Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love,” Charlie Brown once said. Indeed, being spurned by one's crush, or, for that matter, by a friend or potential employer, not only ruins the taste of one's favorite sandwich spread, but causes great psychological distress and even physical pain.Here to walk us through one of life's worst feelings is Mark Leary, a professor of psychology and neuroscience at Duke University, and the editor of Interpersonal Rejection. Today on the show, Mark unpacks the experience of social rejection, including why we're so sensitive to it and the emotions and behaviors it causes, which can be positive and prosocial or maladaptive and even violent. We discuss the role that is played by the sociometer, a concept Mark originated, in monitoring our social acceptance and rejection and what influences its sensitivity to fluctuations in your relational value. And Mark offers advice on how to remove some of the sting of rejection and civilly reject others.Resources Related to the PodcastMark's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #725 — The Curse of the SelfSimpsons' episode where Lisa breaks Ralph's heartAoM Article: Honor in the American SouthConnect With Mark LearyMark's faculty page
40:0028/10/2024
How to Avoid Death by Comfort

How to Avoid Death by Comfort

Note: This is a rebroadcast.Nietzsche's maxim, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger," isn't just a sound philosophical principle. It's also a certifiable physiological phenomenon; toxins and stressors that could be deadly in large doses, actually improve health and resilience in smaller, intermittent ones. The ironic thing, my guest points out, is that it's the fact that we're not getting enough of this sublethal stress these days that's really doing us in.Paul Taylor is a former British Royal Navy Aircrew Officer, an exercise physiologist, nutritionist, and neuroscientist, and the author of Death by Comfort: How Modern Life is Killing Us and What We Can Do About It. Today on the show, Paul discusses the science of hormesis, how small doses of intermittent stress can make us more resistant to chronic stress, and why you need to embrace what Paul calls "discomfort harvesting." We talk about some now-familiar topics like fasting and cold and heat exposure with fresh inspiration as to how important they are to practice and how to do them effectively. We discuss how hot a sauna needs to be to get the benefits of heat exposure, Paul's suggestion for how to make an ice bath on the cheap, what may be the single best type of food to eat to improve your gut's microbiome, a form of fasting that's got anti-cancer benefits but is so accessible it won't even feel like fasting, what supplement to take to mitigate the effects of a bad night's sleep, and much more. We end our conversation with how to use what Paul calls a "ritual board" to stick with your healthy habits and resist the "soft underbelly" of modern life.Resources Related to the PodcastAoMPodcast #708: Overcome the Comfort CrisisAoM article/video on the benefits of cold showersAoM Podcast #801: The Cold Water Swim CureAoM Podcast #603: The Physical Keys to Human ResilienceAoM Article: How Saunas Can Help Save Your Body, Mind, and SpiritAoM Article: How to Sauna — All the FAQsAoM Podcast #585: Inflammation, Saunas, and the New Science of DepressionAoM Podcast #862: Heal the Body With Extended FastingAoM Podcast #328: The Pros and Cons of Intermittent FastingAoM Podcast #581: The Tiny Habits That Change EverythingAoM Podcast #425: Action Over FeelingsThe NOVA Food Classification SystemStanford study on the effect of fiber and fermented food on the microbiomeResearch on creatine as a neurotransmitter and creatine's effect on brain health (including impact when sleep deprived)Connect With PaulTaylorPaul's websitePaul on IGPaul on LinkedInPaul's podcastPaul's mental fitness course for coaches and health professionals
56:3723/10/2024
Lee Child the Writer, Jack Reacher the Character, and the Enduring Appeal of Lone Wolves

Lee Child the Writer, Jack Reacher the Character, and the Enduring Appeal of Lone Wolves

In creating the Jack Reacher character, Lee Child launched a series of books that now boast 100 million copies in print and have been turned into movies and a popular Amazon streaming series.Today on the show, I talk to Lee about what makes Reacher so compelling and much more. We first discuss how Lee didn't get started with writing until he was almost forty, and what prompted him to change careers. We then unpack the Reacher character, discussing the ancient, archetypal roots of this vigilante, drifter detective, what he has in common with the knight errant, and the enduring appeal of the lone wolf. We also talk about Lee's writing process, why midlife is the best time to write, and why, after writing more than two dozen Reacher novels, he's chosen to hand off the series to his brother and fellow writer, Andrew.Resources Related to the PodcastThe latest Reacher novel: In Too DeepThe Reacher streaming series Jack Reacher website 
47:4521/10/2024
Money CAN Buy Happiness (If You Use It In These Ways)

Money CAN Buy Happiness (If You Use It In These Ways)

Money can't buy happiness. It sounds good as a bumper sticker platitude.But the truth is, money can buy happiness. At least sometimes. In certain circumstances. If we view it and use it in the right ways.Here to unpack the conditions under which money can buy happiness and facilitate our flourishing is Dr. Daniel Crosby, a psychologist and behavioral finance expert and the author of The Soul of Wealth: 50 Reflections on Money and Meaning. Today on the show, Daniel shares the minimum income level at which money buys happiness, at least in the sense of avoiding pain. We talk about how to purchase material things in a way that increases happiness, while avoiding materialism, and the value of using your money to buy health and freedom. And we discuss the importance of finding an overarching why that guides the way you allocate your money and doing a values audit to see if your purpose and spending habits are aligned.Resources Related to the PodcastDaniel's previous appearances on the AoM podcast:Episode #222: The Laws of WealthEpisode #511: Mastering the Psychology of InvestingAoM Podcast #659: Do You Want to Be Rich or Wealthy? (And Why the Difference Matters)AoM Podcast #321: How to Think About Money"Experiences Won’t Make You Happier Than Possessions"Die with Zero by Bill PerkinsConnect With Daniel CrosbyDaniel on XDaniel's podcast, Standard DeviationsDaniel on LinkedIn
47:3816/10/2024
The Problems With the Cult of Leadership

The Problems With the Cult of Leadership

Are leaders born or made? Judging by the 50 billion dollar leadership development industry, the answer is definitely the latter. From schools to workplaces, everyone is seen as a potential leader and expected to become one by undergoing leadership training.My guest questions the assumptions underlying this phenomenon, which he calls "the leadership industrial complex," and says that the cult of leadership, and its idea that everyone can and should become a leader, can create burnout and unhappiness.Elias Aboujaoude is a Stanford professor of psychiatry and the author of A Leader's Destiny: Why Psychology, Personality, and Character Make All the Difference. Today on the show, Elias describes the state of the leadership industrial complex, the mathematical impossibility it forwards that everyone can be a leader and no one is a follower, and the primary presumption it makes that leadership can be taught. Elias argues that, in fact, a lot of what makes for good leadership is innate and potentially unchangeable. We discuss the implications of this fact, and why it's actually okay not to want to be a leader.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #838: Can Virtue Be Taught?AoM Article: Don’t Just Lead Well, Follow WellAoM Article: Are You a Strategist or an Operator? Connect With Elias AboujaoudeElias' websiteElias' Stanford profile page
35:0214/10/2024
Treat Your To-Do List Like a River, and Other Mindset Shifts for Making Better Use of Your Time

Treat Your To-Do List Like a River, and Other Mindset Shifts for Making Better Use of Your Time

When people think about living more fully and making better use of their time, they typically think of finding some new organizational system they can structure their lives with.Oliver Burkeman says that what you really need instead are perspective shifts — small, sustainable changes in how you view and approach your day-to-day life. He provides those mindset shifts in his new book, Meditations for Mortals: Four Weeks to Embrace Your Limitations and Make Time for What Counts. And we talk about some of them today on the show, including why you should view life's tasks and problems like a river instead of a bucket, stop feeling guilt over your "productivity debt," make peace with your decisions by embracing an unconventional reading of the poem "The Road Not Taken," aim to do your habits "dailyish," be more welcoming of interruptions, and practice "scruffy hospitality."Resources Related to the PodcastOliver's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #748 — Time Management for MortalsAoM Article: Autofocus — The Productivity System That Treats Your To-Do List Like a RiverAoM Podcast #956: Feeling Depressed and Discombobulated? Social Acceleration May Be to BlameSunday Firesides: To-Dos, the Rent We Pay For LivingAoM Podcast #962: The Case for Minding Your Own BusinessAoM Podcast #821: Routines Are OverratedAoM Article: Routines Not Working For You? Try a Daily ChecklistSunday Firesides: Life Is for LivingResonance: A Sociology of Our Relationship to the World by Hartmut Rosa"The Road Not Taken" by Robert FrostThe Road Not Taken: Finding America in the Poem Everyone Loves and Almost Everyone Gets Wrong by David Orr"The Road Less Traveled" — great, short podcast on the alternate interpretation of Frost's poemConnect With Oliver BurkemanOliver's website
51:3509/10/2024
The 5 Marks of a Man

The 5 Marks of a Man

We often think of the difference between a boy and a man as a matter of age. But Brian Tome says that there can be 15-year-old men and 45-year-old boys, and that the real difference maker in being grown up isn't a matter of the number of years you accumulate but the qualities, behaviors, and mindset you possess.Brian is a pastor and the author of The Five Marks of a Man. Today on the show, Brian unpacks what he thinks are the marks of mature manhood. We talk about the need to have a vision and how life-giving hobbies can create that vision. Brian argues that manhood requires staking out a minority position, being part of a pack, and creating more than you consume. And we discuss the ways men can still be protectors in the 21st century.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #78: The Myth of Following Your PassionAoM Article: The Ultimate List of Hobbies for Men — 75+ Ideas For Your Free TimeAoM series on the 3 P's of Manhood: Protect, Procreate, Provide AoM Podcast #926: The 5 Shifts of ManhoodAoM Podcast #810: How to Turn a Boy Into a ManAoM Article: Why Are Female Friendships the Ideal? (‘Cause Dude Friendships Also Rock)AoM Article: Modern Maturity — Create More, Consume LessBrian's Man CampConnect With Brian TomeBrian's website
50:5607/10/2024
The Imagination Muscle — Where Good Ideas Come From (And How to Have More of Them)

The Imagination Muscle — Where Good Ideas Come From (And How to Have More of Them)

Imagination is the ability to form mental images and concepts that don't exist or haven’t happened yet, think outside of current realities, and form connections between existing ideas to create something new and original.If the number of movie sequels and the outsized popularity of music made decades ago is any measure, our current age is suffering from a deficit in imagination. And indeed, tests show that creativity, which takes the possibilities generated in the mind and produces something with them, has been in decline for many years now — a phenomenon that has repercussions for our personal edification, professional advancement, and societal flowering.But if our imagination has indeed atrophied, the good news is that it can be strengthened. So argues my guest, Albert Read, the former managing director of Condé Nast Britain and the author of The Imagination Muscle: Where Good Ideas Come From (And How to Have More of Them). Today on the show, Albert shares his ideas on how our imagination can be built back up. We discuss how to get better at observation and how to use a commonplace book and the way you structure your reading to cross-pollinate your thinking and generate more fruitful ideas. We also discuss how to overcome the unthinking habit, resist stagnation as you age, and embrace imaginative risk.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #432: How to Achieve Creative SuccessAoM Podcast #683: How to Think Like a Renaissance ManAoM Podcast #357: How to Be a Creative Genius Like da VinciAoM Podcast #874: Throw a 2-Hour Cocktail Party That Can Change Your LifeConnect With Albert ReadAlbert's website 
43:1102/10/2024
5,000 Years of Sweat: Lost Workout Wisdom From the History of Physical Culture

5,000 Years of Sweat: Lost Workout Wisdom From the History of Physical Culture

In an age that doesn't think too much about history, you might be forgiven for thinking that a culture of exercise only emerged in the 20th century. But the idea of purposefully exercising to change one's body — what folks used to call "physical culture" — likely goes back to the very beginnings of time.Here to unpack the origins, evolution, and future of fitness is Dr. Conor Heffernan, a Lecturer in the Sociology of Sport at Ulster University and the author of The History of Physical Culture. Today on the show, Conor takes us on a fascinating and wide-ranging tour of physical culture, from the ancient Egyptians, who made their pharaohs run around a pyramid to test their fitness to rule, to the ancient Greeks who used their gymnasiums for both bodily training and intellectual philosophizing, to modern strongmen who became proto fitness influencers, and many periods and societies in between. We discuss how training practices changed over time, where they may be going next, and the evergreen principles from past eras that we could still learn from today.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #988: Of Strength and Soul — Exploring the Philosophy of Physical FitnessAoM Podcast #939: What Lifting Ancient Stones Can Teach You About Being a ManRogue documentaries on stone lifting in Scotland, Iceland, and SpainAoM Podcast #39: Eugen Sandow, Victorian StrongmanAoM Podcast #624: The Crazy, Forgotten Story of America’s First Fitness Influencer, Bernarr MacFaddenAoM Article: An Introduction to Indian Club TrainingAoM Video: Intro to Indian Club TrainingDe Arte GymnasticaJohann GutsMuthsFriedrich Ludwig JahnTurnvereine gymnastic system The Strongman Project Connect With Conor HeffernanPhysical Culture Study websiteConor's faculty page
01:01:4530/09/2024
What's Going on With Your Social Anxiety?

What's Going on With Your Social Anxiety?

Do you have trouble feeling comfortable when socializing? Maybe sometimes you do fine, but other times you feel nervous, shy, and awkward. Or maybe socializing always feels like a struggle. Either way, you know how frustrating and even debilitating social anxiety can be. It cannot only lead to avoiding potentially enriching experiences and a failure to make desired connections, it can sometimes be hard to understand.So what's going on when you socially misfire?Here to unpack that question is Thomas Smithyman, who is a clinical psychologist and the author of Dating Without Fear: Overcome Social Anxiety and Connect. Today on the show, we get into the dynamics of social anxiety in both romantic and platonic contexts. Thomas explains what defines social anxiety, how it exists on a spectrum from mild shyness to an outright disorder, and what causes it, from genetics to faulty thinking. We talk about the protection strategies people often use to avoid the pain of social judgement, and why they actually backfire. We then get into what you can do to be more socially comfortable and confident, including a key to effective flirting, why you should try to make a "mediocre first impression," and how to find your way into what Thomas calls the "warm social world."Resources Related to the PodcastAoM series on overcoming shyness AoM Article: Introversion as an ExcuseAoM Article: How to Overcome Phone ShynessSunday Firesides: Want to Solve Your Social Problems? Get Over Your SelfConnect With Thomas SmithymanThomas' websiteThomas' YouTube channel
55:5125/09/2024
The Life and Legacy of Louis L'Amour

The Life and Legacy of Louis L'Amour

With over 300 million books sold, Louis L'Amour is one of the bestselling authors of all time. All 120 of his books remain in print. But the greatest story L'Amour ever penned was his own. He spent the early part of his life traveling in a circus, working as a lumberjack and miner, circling the world as a seaman, winning over 50 fights as a professional boxer, and serving in WWII.Today on the show, I talk about both the personal and professional aspects of Louis' life with his son, Beau L'Amour. We discuss some of Louis' adventures and the autodidactic education he gave himself by way of a voracious reading habit. We then turn to how Louis got started as a writer and how he cut his teeth writing for pulp magazines before breaking through as a Western novelist and becoming a blockbuster success in his sixties.Resources Related to the PodcastLouis L'Amour works mentioned in the show:Education of a Wandering Man: A MemoirHondoYonderingNo Traveller ReturnsThe Walking DrumLast of the BreedLouis L'Amour's Lost Treasures, Volume 1 and Volume 2"Holding Her Down" by Jack LondonAoM Article: How and Why to Become a Lifelong LearnerAoM Article: The Libraries of Famous Men — Louis L’AmourConnect With Beau L'AmourThe Louis L'Amour websiteBeau's website
49:0923/09/2024
The Safe, Effective Supplement That Can Improve Your Body and Brain

The Safe, Effective Supplement That Can Improve Your Body and Brain

What if there was a supplement that could build muscle, maintain bone health, fortify the brain against cognitive decline due to age and stress, and alleviate depression, has been proven safe, and comes with almost no side effects? Well, there is such a supplement, it's been around a long time, and it isn't even expensive. It's creatine.Here to unpack the myths, benefits, and recommended ways to use creatine is Darren Candow, a professor of exercise physiology and nutrition who supervises the Aging Muscle and Bone Health Laboratory at the University of Regina. Darren specializes in studying creatine and has published over 70 papers on the subject. Today on the show, Darren explains how a supplement often associated with bodybuilders may actually be beneficial for just about everyone — athletes and non-athletes and the young and old alike. He unpacks what creatine does in the body, and how its benefits extend beyond the body and into the brain. He offers recommendations on the formulation of creatine to use, a suggested dosage and whether it should increase with age, and how to avoid the bloating effect. He also shares what we know about creatine's safety, including its effects on the kidneys, and whether it can cause hair loss.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: Creatine — A Primer on Its Benefits and UseAoM Article: A Primer On Muscle-Building Supplements — Which Work and Which Don’t?AoM Podcast #878: The Fitness Supplements That Actually WorkAoM Podcast #585: Inflammation, Saunas, and the New Science of DepressionAoM Podcast #852: The Brain Energy Theory of Mental IllnessDarren's studiesConnect With Darren CandowDarren's faculty pageDarren on IG
43:1918/09/2024
Is Self-Control Overrated?

Is Self-Control Overrated?

Self-control, the ability to resolve a conflict between two competing desires, is frequently touted as the golden key to success. But many of the most popular ideas about self-control are actually at odds with how it really operates.Here to unpack some of the lesser-understood and counterintuitive ideas around discipline and willpower is Michael Inzlicht, a professor of psychology who has studied the nature of self-regulation in depth. In the first part of our conversation, Michael unpacks the popular ego depletion model of willpower and how it hasn't held up to scientific scrutiny. We then turn to the surprising fact that the people who seem to exhibit a lot of self-control don't actually exercise a lot of discipline and restraint in their lives, that the achievement of goals is more a function of having virtuous desires, and what contributes to having those desires.Resources Related to the PodcastRelated studies:Perceived Mental Fatigue and Self-ControlA Multilab Preregistered Replication of the Ego-Depletion EffectEveryday Temptations: An Experience Sampling Study of Desire, Conflict, and Self-ControlNew Zealand Study on Trait Self-ControlThe Moralization of EffortThe Mundanity of ExcellenceThe Identity Model of Self-RegulationThe Effort Paradox: Effort Is Both Costly and ValuedAoM Podcast #961: The Mundanity of ExcellenceAoM Article: Motivation Over DisciplineAoM Article: ¿Tienes Ganas?Sunday Firesides: What Looks Like Grit, Is Often FitAoM Article: What Do You Want to Want?Connect With Michael InzlichtMichael's websiteMichael's faculty pageMichael on X
01:05:2416/09/2024
You Were Born to Run

You Were Born to Run

For decades, some researchers have argued that the notable human capacity for endurance evolved from the hunting practices of our ancestors, which produced physiological adaptations that make us uniquely well suited for running.But this theory has always had its detractors.As my guest explains, a new study addresses these long-standing criticisms and adds evidence that, indeed, we were all born to run.Alex Hutchinson is a journalist who covers the science of endurance and fitness, and today on the show, he explains what those criticisms were and how this new research counters them. We talk about the role running held amongst peoples of the past, how running is not only primal but cultural and even spiritual, and why we continue to run today, even though we’re not hunting for food. And we discuss how, even if we are born to run, that doesn’t mean everyone will always enjoy running all of the time, and how to get into running if you’re someone who doesn’t feel an innate desire for it.Resources Related to the PodcastAlex’s previous appearances on the AoM podcast:Episode #382: How to Lift More, Run Faster, and Endure LongerEpisode #538: Research-Backed Answers to All Your Fitness FAQs“Why You (Yes, You) Were Born to Run” by Alex Hutchinson“Ethnography and Ethnohistory Support the Efficiency of Hunting Through Endurance Running in Humans”Indian Running: Native American History and Tradition by Peter NabokovThe Hunting Hypothesis by Robert Ardrey“The Energetic Paradox of Human Running and Hominid Evolution” — 1984 paper by David CarrierWhy We Run by Bernd HeinrichAoM Podcast #691: What You Can (Really) Learn About Exercise from Your Human Ancestors With Daniel LiebermanBorn to Run by Christopher McDougall“Reexamining the Mythology of the Tarahumara Runners” by Alex HutchinsonTo the Limit: The Meaning of Endurance from Mexico to the Himalayas by Michael CrawleyConnect With Alex HutchinsonAlex’s websiteAlex at Outside 
40:0511/09/2024
Becoming a Tech Intentional Family

Becoming a Tech Intentional Family

In a family, a lot of the dynamics around devices and screens are reactive in nature. Kids bug for their own smartphones, parents worry they'll be left out without one, and without weighing the pros and cons, give in to their kids' requests. Parents let children have a ton of screen time because it lets the parents do what they want; then, they reach a moment where they feel disturbed about how much time their kids are on screens, berate their children for this habit, which they've facilitated, and vow that things are going to abruptly turn around.Rather than basing your policies about kids and screens on mood, fear, and impulse, it would be better to do so based on reason and reflection. Emily Cherkin has some ideas on how to get there. Emily is a former teacher, a screentime consultant who helps parents and educators balance the role of devices in kids' lives, and the author of The Screentime Solution: A Judgment-Free Guide to Becoming a Tech-Intentional Family. Today on the show, Emily unpacks the state of screentime amongst kids today, how the "displacement hypothesis" explains how its impact extends beyond a decline in mental health, and why parents give their kids smartphones even when they're not sure it's good for them. We then turn to how families can become more tech intentional, and how that starts with parents taking a look at their own behavior. We discuss why putting parental controls on devices isn't the ultimate solution, why a better one is based on your relationship with your kids, why you need to live your digital life out loud, and some considerations to think through before getting your kid their first smartphone.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #300: How to Raise Free Range Kids With Lenore SkenazyAoM Article: What’s the Right Age to Get a Kid Their First Smartphone? 3 Tech Thinkers Weigh InAoM Article: The Best Internet Filter for KidsThe Anxious Generation by Jonathan HaidtThe Light PhoneConnect With Emily CherkinEmily's website
50:3709/09/2024
10 Philosophy-Inspired Challenges for Becoming a Better and Happier Man

10 Philosophy-Inspired Challenges for Becoming a Better and Happier Man

Although they may call it different things and approach its attainment in different ways, many of the world’s religions and philosophies have a similar goal: achieving a life of virtue, peace, and flourishing.In his new book, Seriously Happy, Ben Aldrige explains how anyone can use the wisdom of ancient traditions to improve themselves and live the Good life. Today on the show, Ben offers a thumbnail sketch of Buddhism, Cynicism, Taoism, Stoicism, Epicureanism, and Aristotelianism, along with practices and challenges inspired by these philosophies, including walking a banana, listening to a music performance without music, and taking a Wu Wei adventure, that you can use to put ancient wisdom into action and become a better and happier man.Resources Related to the PodcastBen’s previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #640 — Weird and Wonderful Ways to Get Comfortable Being UncomfortableAoM Podcast #148: Trying Not to TryWhy Buddhism is True: The Science and Philosophy of Meditation and Enlightenment by Robert WrightJohn Cage’s 4’33”Albert Ellis’ Rational Emotive Behavior TherapyConnect With Ben AldridgeBen’s website
49:4304/09/2024
How to Win Friends and Influence People in the 21st Century

How to Win Friends and Influence People in the 21st Century

Note: This is a rebroadcast.Over the last year, my 12-year-old son has been doing one challenge every week as a rite of passage and chance to earn a special trip. Some of these challenges have involved reading a book in a week, and the most recent book we gave him to read was How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie. His review? He said it was the best book he's read so far.So a book written almost 90 years ago can still be a favorite of a kid in the 21st century. Talk about some staying power. The advice in How to Win Friends & Influence People, and Dale Carnegie's other classic, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, is timeless. But to help introduce it to a new audience, my guest, Joe Hart, has recently co-authored the book Take Command, which synthesizes, updates, and adds to the principles of Carnegie's two perennial bestsellers. Joe is the President and CEO of Dale Carnegie & Associates, which continues Carnegie's work in the present day, and we begin our conversation with some background on the guy who kicked off this work back in 1936. We then talk about what principles we can take from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living on developing a positive mindset. From there, we talk about the big overarching principle of How to Win Friends & Influence People, and how you can use it to improve your relationships. We end our conversation with advice on how to live life with more intentionality and meaning.Resources Related to the EpisodeHow to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale CarnegieHow to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale CarnegieThe Dale Carnegie Website, with links to the Take Command book page and the Dale Carnegie CourseAoM Article: The 8 Best Vintage Self-Improvement BooksAoM Podcast #818: The Philosophy of Self-ImprovementAoM Podcast #457: Leadership Lessons With Craig GroeschelAoM Podcast #527: The Journey to the Second Half of Life With Richard RohrAoM Podcast #518: The Second Mountain With David BrooksConnect With Joe HartJoe on TwitterJoe on LinkedIn
52:2502/09/2024
It's Never Too Late to Achieve Your Dream, Receive Recognition, or Make Your Mark

It's Never Too Late to Achieve Your Dream, Receive Recognition, or Make Your Mark

As you get older, you can start to feel like you'll never achieve your dream or receive recognition for your contributions to a field, or that your best work is behind you.Mo Rocca has compiled stories that demonstrate that you shouldn't give up hope, and that no matter your age, the best may yet be to come.Mo is a humorist, journalist, and the co-author of Roctogenarians: Late in Life Debuts, Comebacks, and Triumphs. Today on the show, Mo shares the stories and lessons of entrepreneurs, artists, actors, and more who achieved greatness or adulation in their twilight years or had a new spurt of creativity when they thought the well had run dry, including KFC founder Colonel Sanders, the artist Matisse, a couple of guys who didn't receive their first war wounds until they were old enough to qualify for the senior citizen discount at Denny's, and even a virile 90-year-old tortoise.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #849: Live Life in CrescendoSamuel WhittemoreJohn L. BurnsFrank Lloyd Wright's FallingwaterFrank Lloyd Wright's Guggenheim MuseumHenri Matisse's The Swimming PoolDocumentary about Tyrus WongMr. Pickles the TortoiseConnect With Mo RoccaMo on X
42:4928/08/2024
When He's Married to Mom

When He's Married to Mom

Your relationship with your mother is likely the first and most foundational connection in your life. At its best, this bond can be a source of comfort, strength, and love that lasts a lifetime and changes in healthy, appropriate, and adaptive ways as you mature into adulthood.But sometimes, the attachment between a mother and her son can become unhealthy, resulting in a phenomenon called mother-son enmeshment, in which a man can become a kind of surrogate husband to his mom.Here to unpack this complex issue is Dr. Kenneth Adams. Ken is a clinical psychologist who has spent much of his career working with what he calls "mother-enmeshed men" and is the author of When He's Married to Mom. Today on the show, Ken unpacks the characteristics of mother-enmeshed men and how to know if you are one, and he explains what can happen in childhood that would cause a mother to enmesh with her son. We discuss the problems enmeshment can create in men's relationships and other areas of life and how it can lead to things like compulsive porn use. And we unpack what it means for a man to become independent and emancipate from his mother, how it's different from cutting her off, and what it looks like to have a healthy relationship with your mom.Connect with Ken AdamsOvercoming Enmeshment website 
47:5126/08/2024
Unlock Better Sleep and Health by Harnessing Your Circadian Rhythm

Unlock Better Sleep and Health by Harnessing Your Circadian Rhythm

You probably know your body follows a circadian rhythm, and probably think of it as primarily regulating your sleep/wake cycle, which it certainly does. But your body's internal clock also regulates many other physical, mental, and behavioral changes that occur every 24 hours, and working with your circadian rhythm, rather than against it, can boost your health and happiness.Here to unpack how to do so is Russell Foster, a professor of circadian neuroscience and the author of Life Time: Your Body Clock and Its Essential Roles in Good Health and Sleep. In the first part of our conversation, we discuss some science and background on circadian rhythm and its connection to light exposure. We then turn to the practical implications of having an internal clock, including whether you need to worry about viewing blue light at night, the significant mental and physical harms that can accrue from working the night shift and what can be done to mitigate them, what influences your chronotype and whether you're a morning lark or a night owl, whether you should be concerned if you're waking up in the middle of the night, why you wake up to pee in the night, the best times of day to exercise, and how the circadian rhythm can influence when you should take medication.Connect With Russell FosterRussell at the Sleep and Circadian Neuroscience Institute
53:2521/08/2024
Boots, Tents, Sleeping Bags, and More: How to Choose and Use Outdoor Gear

Boots, Tents, Sleeping Bags, and More: How to Choose and Use Outdoor Gear

A fair amount of gear is involved in making a camping or backpacking trip a success, and choosing that gear can be a little intimidating as there are lots of options, and it's expensive to boot.Here to offer some tips on selecting gear and getting the most out of it is Craig Caudill, an avid outdoorsman, the director and lead instructor of the Nature Reliance School, and the author of Ultimate Wilderness Gear: Everything You Need to Know to Choose and Use the Best Outdoor Equipment. Today on the show, Craig and I discuss some things to know when purchasing things like boots, tents, sleeping bags, and more, and we offer some specific recommendations as to the gear that's worked for us respectively. Craig also offers tips on using outdoor equipment, including how to dry wet boots without damaging them, whether you should put a tarp under your tent, what to do if you get hot and sweaty or cold in your sleeping bag, a hack for sleeping more comfortably on the ground, and the best kind of knife for an outdoorsman to carry.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: How to Filter and Purify Water for Traveling, Camping, and SurvivalAoM Article: The Benefits of Hammock CampingAoM Article: How to Pack a Backpack for BackpackingAoM Article: Two Things You Should Be Doing to Take Better Care of Your Camping GearAoM Article: Outdoor Hydration Showdown — Nalgene Bottle vs. Water BladderAoM Article: How to Choose the Perfect Survival KnifeCraig's booksNative Summit in Edmond, OKBrett's Tent: Hubba Hubba 2-Person Backpacking TentHennessy Hammock TentWarbonnet Hammock TentsMilitary Modular Sleep SystemBrett's Sleeping Pad: Big AgnesKate's Sleeping Pad: Therm-A-Rest Trail Prolite ApexBackpacking CotBrett's Backpacking Pillow: Sea to Summit AerosBrett's Water Bladder: HydraPak Shape-ShiftCraig's Water Filter: Sawyer MiniBrett's Water Filter: Katadyn Hiker Pro Hand Pump Water FilterSawyer Squeeze Water FilterBrett's Backpacking Stove: Jetboil StoveFire-Maple Backpacking StoveMSR Backpacking StoveLT Wright Handcrafted KnivesFast Fire FirestartersHill People Gear BackpacksConnect With Craig CaudillNature Reliance SchoolCraig on IGCraig on LinkedIn
48:2119/08/2024
The Habits of Highly Effective Risk-Takers

The Habits of Highly Effective Risk-Takers

You may know Nate Silver as an election forecaster. But he’s a poker player as well. And his experiences operating in a world of competition and risk led him to explore what his fellow gamblers, as well as hedge fund managers, venture capitalists, and many other kinds of maverick types do differently than other people.Amongst the findings Nate shares in his new book, On the Edge: The Art of Risking Everything, are the “13 habits of highly effective risk-takers.” Nate and I discuss some of these habits today on the show, including exercising strategic empathy, avoiding the pitfalls of resulting, taking a raise or fold stance toward life, and more.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #685: How to Decide With Annie DukeAoM Podcast #840: When to Quit With Annie DukeSunday Firesides: Careful KillsConnect With Nate SilverNate‘s SubstackNate on X
43:2414/08/2024
Practicing Spiritual Disciplines as an Act of Resistance

Practicing Spiritual Disciplines as an Act of Resistance

To train the body, strengthening its muscles, increasing its cardiovascular health, and improving its agility, you need to do exercises like stretching, running, and lifting weights.To train the soul, expanding its capacity, you likewise need to perform exercises, in this case, what are called "spiritual disciplines" — practices like fasting, silence, self-examination, study, and simplicity.As a pastor, John Mark Comer approaches the spiritual disciplines from a Christian perspective, as the habits and practices from "the way of Jesus" that allow individuals to make deeper layers of themselves available to grace and access the transforming power that's necessary to become what John Mark calls "a person of love."But the practices that are considered spiritual disciplines can be found across different religions, and even philosophies like Stoicism, and can be utilized by people from varied backgrounds to deepen their inner life and strength, center themselves in chaos, find greater purpose, and subdue baser desires to reach for higher ideals.Today on the show, John Mark offers an introduction to the spiritual disciplines, and the way they can be an act of resistance, a way for us to form our own values and rhythms in life, instead of allowing our lives to be formed by the defaults and external forces of our age.Resources Related to the PodcastThe Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark ComerPracticing the Way by John Mark ComerAoM's series on the spiritual disciplines:An Introduction to the Spiritual DisciplinesStudy and Self-ExaminationSolitude and SilenceSimplicityFastingGratitudeAoM Article: How and Why to Take a Tech SabbathAoM Podcast #503: The Case for the 24/6 LifestyleAoM Podcast #708: Overcome the Comfort CrisisConnect With John Mark ComerJohn Mark's website 
58:2612/08/2024
The Science of Motivating Your Kids (And Any Young Adult)

The Science of Motivating Your Kids (And Any Young Adult)

If you’re a parent, teacher, coach, or manager who lives, loves, and works with tweens, teens, and 20s-somethings, you know that young people sometimes act in seemingly head-scratching ways, that you don’t always feel like you’re being listened to, and that it can be frustrating to try to guide them in acting towards positive ends.The source of these challenges is often chalked up to the underdeveloped brains and hormones that tweens through young twenty-somethings possess. But my guest would say that what’s more to blame is the ineffective way mentors often approach young adults.David Yeager is a developmental psychologist and the author of 10 to 25: The Science of Motivating Young People: A Groundbreaking Approach to Leading the Next Generation—And Making Your Own Life Easier. Today on the show, David and I discuss the “mentor’s dilemma” — the idea that you either have to be a tough authoritarian who holds young adults to high standards or a softie push-over who doesn’t crush a kid’s spirit — and how to navigate through this unnecessary dichotomy. David explains the critical importance of understanding what really drives young adults, what approaches cause them to shut down and disengage, and the best practices that parents, teachers, and other mentors can take to leave young adults feeling inspired, enthusiastic, and ready to contribute.Connect With David YeagerTexas Behavioral Science and Policy InstituteDavid’s faculty page
51:1207/08/2024
Lose Weight and Keep It Off With Flexible Dieting

Lose Weight and Keep It Off With Flexible Dieting

When many people try to lose weight, they choose a specific, cookie-cutter diet that claims to be the one true way to shed pounds. My guest says that approach is bound to backfire, and that there's a better way to lose weight and change your body composition.Alan Aragon is a researcher and educator, a pioneer of evidence-based nutrition, and the author of Flexible Dieting: A Science-Based, Reality-Tested Method for Achieving and Maintaining Your Optimal Physique, Performance & Health. Today on the show, Alan offers an intro to his method of flexible dieting, in which, as long as you stay in a caloric deficit and hit your daily protein target, you can decide on how much fat and carbs to consume according to personal preference. We discuss what to keep in mind as you create your own individualized nutrition plan, including how much protein you need a day, the minimum amount of fat to get in your diet to avoid a decrease in testosterone, and the minimum of carbs to consume to maximize muscle gain. And, because flexible dieting is also about not rigidly sticking with your diet 100% of the time, Alan shares how often you should take a break from your diet to eat what you want.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #475: How to Lose Weight, and Keep It Off ForeverAlan's diet calculatorAoM intro to tracking macrosAoM Article: How I Used the AoM Podcast to Lose 20 Pounds in 3 MonthsAoM Article: Why Carbs Don’t Make You FatConnect With Alan AragonAlan's website and research reviewAlan on IGAlan on X
48:5005/08/2024
How to Resist Group Anxiety and Become a Differentiated Self

How to Resist Group Anxiety and Become a Differentiated Self

When we think about anxiety, we typically think of something that is generated and felt within an individual. But Murray Bowen, a psychiatrist of the mid-20th century, argued that anxiety was also created by the interactions between individuals and could spread like a contagion in a group, an idea known as "Family Systems Theory."Here to offer an introduction to Family Systems Theory and how its implications extend far beyond the family is Steve Cuss, who is a former hospital chaplain, a pastor, the founder of Capable Life, which offers coaching and consultation, and the author of Managing Leadership Anxiety: Yours and Theirs. Today on the show, Steve and I discuss how individuals in both families and organizations can "infect a situation with [their] own assumptions and expectations" and create a sense of anxiety that permeates a group. Steve unpacks the false needs that create chronic anxiety in an individual, how this anxiety spreads to others, and the unhealthy ways people deal with this tension, including becoming fused together. And we talk about how to put this anxiety back where it belongs, and how a single person can change a group dynamic by differentiating from it and becoming a rooted self.Resources Related to the PodcastMurray BowenA Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix by Edwin H. FriedmanAoM Article: The 5 Characteristics of Highly Dysfunctional GroupsAoM Article: Becoming a Well-Differentiated LeaderThe Cornerstone Concept by Roberta M. GilbertSunday Firesides: You Are Not Responsible for Other People’s FeelingsConnect With Steve CussSteve's website
55:4531/07/2024
The Vital Skills We’re Losing to Technology (And How to Reclaim Them)

The Vital Skills We’re Losing to Technology (And How to Reclaim Them)

Do moments where you run up against your dependence on modern technology get you wondering about the ways some of your personal capabilities seem to be atrophying?Graham Lee has spent years thinking about this idea. While he's a digital skills educator who appreciates the way technology can enhance our abilities, he worries that our ever-increasing reliance on algorithms and artificial intelligence may be robbing us of elements that are vital to the core of who we are.Lee is the author of Human Being: Reclaim 12 Vital Skills We’re Losing to Technology, and today on the show, we talk about some of those dozen endangered skills, including navigation, reading, writing, craftsmanship, and solitude. Lee offers case studies on how these skills enhance our humanness, why their loss matters, and how we can reclaim these capabilities and a greater sense of satisfaction and self-efficacy.Resources Related to the PodcastWe, the Navigators, The Ancient Art of Landfinding in the Pacific by David LewisAoM series on learning how to navigate with a map and compassAoM Podcast #534: How Navigation Makes Us HumanAoM Podcast #793: The New Science of Metabolism and Weight LossAoM article on the benefits of solitude Indian Running: Native American History and Tradition by Peter NabokovWatchmaker Geoge DanielsCastaway Alexander SelkirkNotebookLMConnect With Graham LeeGraham on LinkedIn
49:3229/07/2024
How to Know When It's Time to Break Up With Your Job

How to Know When It's Time to Break Up With Your Job

You have a relationship with family, with friends, with a romantic partner. You may not have thought about it this way, but you also have a relationship with your job — a quite serious one, in fact; after all, you spend a third of your life working.Just like the relationship you have with your significant other, there are ups and downs with your relationship with your job. It can start out with exciting honeymoon feelings, but along the way, you can end up drifting apart from your job, lose interest in it, or not feel appreciated. And there can come a time when you start wondering if you and your job should part ways.Here to help you figure out if you should break up with your job is Tessa West, a professor of psychology and the author of Job Therapy: Finding Work That Works for You. Tessa interviewed thousands of people who have recently switched jobs or undergone career changes and found that there are five forms that job dissatisfaction typically takes. Today on the show, Tessa shares those five job dissatisfaction profiles, and how to know when you need to try to move into a new role within your company, or move on altogether and even change careers.Resources Related to the PodcastTessa's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #834 — The 7 Types of Work Jerks (And How to Deal With Them)AoM Article: 30+ Questions to Ask Yourself Before Leaving a JobAoM Podcast #578: Figuring Out If You Should Change Careers (And How to Do It)Connect With TessaWestTessa's websiteTessa's research lab
49:4024/07/2024
The Essential Habits for Becoming an Agile, Vital, and Durable Human Being

The Essential Habits for Becoming an Agile, Vital, and Durable Human Being

Kelly Starrett, a doctor of physical therapy, has trained professional athletes, Olympians, and military special operators, helping them unlock peak performance. But as he approached his fifties, he started to see cracks appearing in the health of the folks around him. What had worked for his peers in their 20s and 30s, wasn’t working anymore; they were gaining weight, having surgeries, and just didn’t feel good.So he and his wife and fellow trainer, Juliet, decided to write a book — Built to Move: The Ten Essential Habits to Help You Move Freely and Live Fully — that took all that they’ve learned from training elite performers and distilled it into the foundational practices that everyone, at every age, can use to develop lasting mobility, durability, and all-around health. Today on the show, Kelly unpacks some of those essential physical habits, sharing the “vital signs” — tests that will help you assess how you’re doing in that area — as well as daily practices that will help you strengthen and improve that capacity.Resources Related to the PodcastKelly’s previous appearance on the AoM podcast — Episode #213: Undoing the Damage of Chronic SittingAoM article on the Sitting-Rising TestAoM Article: 7 Simple Exercises That Undo the Damage of Sitting (including the Couch Stretch)AoM article on foam rollingAoM Article: The Benefits of Hanging for Strength and MobilityAoM Article: 12 Balance Exercises You Can Do on a 2×4AoM Podcast #638: How Changing Your Breathing Can Change Your LifeAoM Podcast #678: Physical Benchmarks Every Man Should Meet, At Every AgeMuscles and Meridians: The Manipulation of Shape by Phillip BeachVideo of Kelly demonstrating the Couch StretchVideo of Kelly demonstrating the squat testVideo of 90/90 sit/stretchVideo of Chris Hinshaw demonstrating the Old Man Balance TestGet yourself a pull-up barThe SlackBlockKelly’s article on fixing shoulder pain, including a video on the Shoulder Spin-UpConnect With Kelly StarrettThe Ready State website, including the Built to Move book pageThe Ready State on IGKelly on Twitter
49:2122/07/2024
The 5 Mountains of Personal Development

The 5 Mountains of Personal Development

The journey of personal development, of becoming a more excellent and extraordinary individual, can sometimes seem a little abstract. That’s why it’s helpful to imagine it as Mark Divine does, as a set of five metaphorical mountains to scale.Mark is a retired Navy SEAL Commander, a professor of leadership, a yogi, the creator of fitness and mindset programs like SEALFIT and Unbeatable Mind, and an author. He combines his two decades of military service with his study of martial arts and zen meditation to create the holistic warrior monk development philosophy that informs his work, including his latest book, Uncommon: Simple Principles for an Extraordinary Life.Today on the show, Mark acts as a guide to the topography of the five mountains of personal development and the daily practices that will help you summit them. We talk about why mastering the physical mountain comes first and climbing the intuitional mountain comes fourth, the Navy SEAL breathing practice that will help you develop your metacognition, how the Japanese concept of ikigai can help you find your purpose in life, and much more.Resources Related to the PodcastMark’s previous appearance on the Art of Manliness podcast: Episode #60 — The Way of the SEALBox breathingUnbeatable Mind by Mark Divine Staring Down the Wolf by Mark DivineAoM Article: 4 Key Insights From the Bhagavad GitaAoM Podcast #616: A Guide for the Journey to Your True CallingSunday Firesides: You Don’t Have the Time, Not to Take the TimeF3 NationIkigaiConnect With Mark DivineUncommon website Mark’s websiteMark on IG
54:4717/07/2024
Stop Drowning in Tedious Tasks by Taming Your Life Admin

Stop Drowning in Tedious Tasks by Taming Your Life Admin

Filling out paperwork. Making travel reservations. Paying bills. Shopping for groceries. Returning packages.These are all examples of life admin — the little tasks we have to do to keep our lives moving along.Life admin is typically pretty tedious and annoying. But staying on top of it is essential to reducing the stress and chaos that would otherwise burden our relationships, muck up the gears of our schedules, and prevent us from participating in all the fun and fulfilling parts of life.Fortunately, there are ways to better manage your life admin. Here to share some of them is Dinah Rowe-Roberts, the co-host of the Life Admin Life Hacks podcast and the co-author of a book of the same name. Today on the show, Dinah explains what lists you should be keeping, including the 10-minute time killers list, why you should do a regular “hour of power” to stay on top of things, how to schedule your life admin, how to keep track of and divvy up chores between you and your spouse, how to get all your meal planning and grocery shopping done in less than 15 minutes a week, how to streamline your kids’ schedules and your vacation planning, and much more.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM article on shadow workAoM article and podcast on how to have a weekly marriage meetingAoM article on how to have a weekly family meetingAoM article on how to use Todoist to get things doneAoM article on how to manage your lifeadminAoM article on how and why to have a reset dayAoM article on 8 lists you should be keeping (besides the to-do list)Connect With Dinah Rowe-RobertsThe LifeAdminLife Hacks websiteLifeAdminLife Hacks on IGDinah on LinkedIn
48:1215/07/2024
A Surprising Solution for Disordered Masculinity

A Surprising Solution for Disordered Masculinity

There has been a lot of media coverage and dialogue about the struggles men are facing in the modern day. There's been some solutions forwarded to these struggles as well. Among these, Dr. Anthony Bradley has a more surprising idea that you don't hear every day: revitalizing college fraternities.Anthony is a research fellow and professor and the author of Heroic Fraternities: How College Men Can Save Universities and America. In the first part of our conversation, Anthony offers his take on the state of men in the modern day, the difference between heroic and disordered masculinity, the insights that a writer from the mid-20-century can shed on the forms that disorder can take, and why many men today are choosing the path of resignation. We then turn to Anthony's idea that college fraternities can be the training ground for virtue. We talk about the loftier origins of fraternities, why, at some universities, they devolved into organizations that have become symbolic of the worst traits of masculinity, and Anthony's six principles for reviving the potential of fraternities to shape great men.Resources Related to the PodcastNeurosis and Human Growth: The Struggle Towards Self-Realization by Karen HorneyAoM Podcast #758: The Epic Story of the Making of The GodfatherAnthony's framework and list of resources for the course he teaches on the masculine journeyConnect With Anthony BradleyAnthony's website
53:2910/07/2024
The Sunscreen Debate — Are We Blocking Our Way to Better Health?

The Sunscreen Debate — Are We Blocking Our Way to Better Health?

You probably think of the health effects of sunlight as a mixed bag. On the one hand, sun exposure helps your body make vitamin D. But on the other, it can cause skin cancer.To get around this conundrum, dermatologists frequently recommend avoiding sun exposure when you can, slathering on sunscreen when you can't, and taking a vitamin D supplement to make up for the lack of sunlight in your life.Yet in seeking to solve one problem, this advice may open up many others and be contributing to ill health in the West.Today on the show, Rowan Jacobsen, a science journalist who has spent years investigating the health impacts of sunlight, will unpack the underappreciated benefits of sun exposure, and that, crucially, they're not primarily a function of the production of vitamin D and can't be replaced with a pill. We talk about what else is at work in ultraviolet radiation's positive effects on blood pressure, autoimmune diseases, insulin resistance, mood, and more. We also get into how to weigh these benefits against the risk of skin cancer, why health officials in Australia, which has the highest rate of skin cancer in the world, have changed their recommendations around sun exposure, and if there's a role sunscreen should still play in your routine.Resources Related to the PodcastRowan's article in Outside magazine: Is Sunscreen the New Margarine? Rowan's article in the Atlantic: Against Sunscreen AbsolutismAoM Article: Why You Should Become a Sun WorshipperDermatologist Richard Weller's TED talk: Could the Sun Be Good for Your Heart?Australian recommendations on sun exposure Connect With Rowan JacobsonRowan's website 
50:5908/07/2024
Optimize Your Testosterone

Optimize Your Testosterone

When men think about optimizing their hormones, they tend only to think about raising their testosterone. But while increasing T can be important, an ideal health profile also means having testosterone that's in balance with your other hormones as well.Today on the show, Dr. Kyle Gillett joins me to discuss both of those prongs of all-around hormone optimization. We start with a quick overview of the different hormones that affect male health. We then get into what qualifies as low testosterone and how to accurately test yours. We also discuss what causes low testosterone in individual men, and how its decline in the general male population may be linked to both birth control and the world wars. In the second half of our conversation, we discuss how to both raise testosterone and get rid of excess estrogen, including the use of some effective supplements you may never have heard of. We then get into the risks and benefits of taking TRT, before ending our discussion with what young men can do to prepare for a lifetime of optimal T and hormonal health.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM series on testosterone, including How I Doubled My Testosterone Levels NaturallyAoM Podcast #761: How Testosterone Makes Men, MenAoM Podcast #878: The Fitness Supplements That Actually Work Connect With Dr. Kyle GillettKyle on IGGillett Health Podcast on Spotify and AppleGillett Health on YouTubeGillett Health website
46:3603/07/2024
Books, Routines, and Habits: The Founders' Guide to Self-Improvement

Books, Routines, and Habits: The Founders' Guide to Self-Improvement

A lot of self-improvement advice and content feels empty. And there's a reason for that. It often offers routines and habits to practice, but doesn't offer a strong, overarching reason to practice them.That's why the self-improvement advice of the Founding Fathers is particularly compelling. Though they were imperfect men, they had a clear why for trying to become better than they were. For the Founders, life was about the pursuit of happiness, and they equated happiness with excellence and virtue — a state that wasn't about feeling good, but being good. The Founders pursued happiness not only for the personal benefit in satisfaction and tranquility it conferred, but for the way the attainment of virtue would benefit society as a whole; they believed that political self-government required personal self-government.Today on the show, Jeffrey Rosen, a professor of law, the president of the National Constitution Center, and the author of The Pursuit of Happiness, shares the book the Founders read that particularly influenced their idea of happiness as virtue and self-mastery. We talk about the schedules and routines the Founders kept, the self-examination practices they did to improve their character, and how they worked on their flaws, believing that, while moral perfection was ultimately an impossible goal to obtain, it was still something worth striving for.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM's series on Benjamin Franklin's 13 VirtuesBen Franklin Virtues Journal available in the AoM StoreAoM Article: Young Benjamin Franklin’s Plan of ConductAoM Article: Thomas Jefferson’s 10 Rules for LifeAoM Article: The Libraries of Famous Men — Thomas Jefferson’s Recommended ReadingAoM Article: The Best John Adams QuotesAoM Article: George Washington’s Rules of Civility and Decent Behavior in Company and ConversationAoM Podcast #366: Teach Yourself Like George WashingtonAoM Article: The Spiritual Disciplines — Study and Self-ExaminationTusculan Disputations by Marcus Tullius CiceroThe Golden Verses of Pythagoras Connect With Jeffrey RosenThe National Constitution Center website We the People podcastJeffrey's faculty pageJeffrey on X
44:5001/07/2024
The Fascinating Differences Between Male and Female Friendships

The Fascinating Differences Between Male and Female Friendships

Friendships are a central part of the lives of both men and women. But from personal observation, you've probably noticed that the dynamics of male and female friendships aren't always the same. You may not, however, have been able to articulate what those differences are or have known what's behind them.While there's still a lot of facets of friendship that haven't yet been researched, Dr. Jaimie Krems, who runs UCLA's Social Minds Lab, has a lot of interesting insights about what we do know about how and why men and women approach friendship differently. Today on the show, she explains why men and women form friendships and the differences in the size and nature of their social circles, how long their friendships last, and what they look for in friends. We also discuss why men have a greater tolerance for their friends' flaws than women do, why men and women would want to be friends with each other, and how each sex experiences friendship jealousy.Resources Related to the PodcastThe Banker's ParadoxJoyce Benenson's research on "Males' Greater Tolerance of Same-Sex Peers"Jaimie's research on women's interpretation of disgust facesJaimie's study: "Friendship Jealousy: One Tool for Maintaining Friendships in the Face of Third-Party Threats?"AoM Podcast #229: How Men and Women Socialize DifferentlyAoMPodcast #360: Understanding Male FriendshipsAoM Podcast #726: What’s Causing the Male Friendship Recession?AoM Podcast #772: How Long Does It Take to Make Friends (And How Does That Process Work, Anyway)?AoM Article: How Not to Be Disappointed With Your FriendsConnect With Jaimie KremsThe Social Minds Lab at UCLAJaimie's faculty pageJaimie on X
50:4826/06/2024
Systems and Tools for Stealing Back Hours of Productivity

Systems and Tools for Stealing Back Hours of Productivity

Businesses and individuals often feel overwhelmed and stretched — that they can't get done all the work they need to. The solution they frequently turn to is finding a new app to use or hiring more employees to spread the load.But my guest would say that you can steal back hours of productive time simply by using the tools and teams you have now, if you learn to use them in a more efficient way.Nick Sonnenberg is the founder and CEO of Leverage, an efficiency consulting business and the author of Come Up for Air: How Teams Can Leverage Systems and Tools to Stop Drowning in Work. Today on the show, Nick explains how people spend almost 60% of their time doing work about work, and why hiring more people can actually make the problem worse rather than better. He then shares his "CPR Business Efficiency Framework," and how making changes in how you communicate, plan, and manage resources can open up hours of time. We talk about how to organize your communication channels so your work day isn't taken up by what Nick calls "The Scavenger Hunt," one of the most underutilized tools for taming your inbox, how to stop wasting time on meetings, and tiny changes that will add up to many hours saved each year. Along the way, we talk about how some of these tactics can save you time in your personal life as well.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #689: Email Is Making Us Miserable — Here’s What to Do About ItAoM Podcast #972: Down With Pseudo-Productivity — Why We Need to Transform the Way We WorkAoM Podcast #973: A Butler’s Guide to Managing Your HouseholdTeach Your Wife to Be a Widow by Donald I. Rogers"Saving Seconds Is Better Than Hours" — Time article by NickTexts.comWorkona tab managerConnect With Nick SonnenbergCome Up for Air websiteLeverage websiteNick on LinkedInNick on IGNick on X
49:5024/06/2024
EPISODE #1,000! Rules for the Modern Man

EPISODE #1,000! Rules for the Modern Man

Fifteen years and more than 200 million downloads later, this episode marks the 1,000th installment of the Art of Manliness podcast! It begins with a bit of a retrospective on the podcast and then segues into an interview with one of the show's earliest guests: Walker Lamond, author of Rules for My Unborn Son. Walker and I revisit the origins of the book and the early days of the internet and have a fun discussion of which of his rules have become obsolete and which remain evergreen. Tune in and enjoy!A big thanks to our listeners for helping us reach this cool milestone. The support is deeply appreciated!Resources Related to the PodcastRules for My Unborn Son by Walker LamondRules for My Newborn Daughter by Walker LamondWalker's Motel: The Starlight Motor InnThe podcasts Walker writes/produces for:Anatomy of MurderCold BloodedRelated AoM articles:Dressing for OthersFlying Is for the BirdsMy New Favorite Summertime ShoeWhy Every Man Should Have 3 Signature DishesIn Praise of the PostcardThe Art of Thank You Note WritingThe Importance of Developing and Maintaining Your Social FitnessRelated AoM Podcasts#1: We Who Are Alive and Remain#7: Rules for My Unborn Son #78: The Myth of Following Your Passion#174: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Style#708: Overcome the Comfort Crisis
01:23:1119/06/2024
The Epic Adventures of America’s Forgotten Mountain Man

The Epic Adventures of America’s Forgotten Mountain Man

Plenty of famous explorers and frontiersmen emerged from America's periods of expansion and exploration, and today the likes of Daniel Boone, Kit Carson, and Davy Crockett remain household names.You're probably not familiar, but should be, with the name of another prominent pioneer: Jedediah Smith. Smith was a hunter, trapper, writer, cartographer, mountain man, and explorer who notched a lot of firsts: He was the first to lead a documented exploration from the Salt Lake frontier to the Colorado River and was part of the first parties of U.S. citizens to cross the Mojave Desert, the Sierra Nevada, and the Great Basin Desert. Having survived three attacks by Native Americans and one mauling by a grizzly bear, Smith's explorations became resources for those who followed after and led to the use of the South Pass as the dominant route across the Continental Divide for pioneers on the Oregon Trail.In the new book he co-authored, Throne of Grace: A Mountain Man, an Epic Adventure, and the Bloody Conquest of the American West, my guest, Bob Drury, uses the oft-forgotten Smith as a guide to an oft-forgotten period in American history. Today on the show, Bob paints a picture of a volatile American landscape in which trappers and Native Americans collided and clashed in the early decades of the 19th century. We discuss how the Lewis and Clark expedition created a lust for adventure among young men, how the humble beaver played an outsized role in settling the Western frontier, and how warfare changed amongst Native American tribes with the introduction of the horse. Along the way, Bob shows us how the life of Jed Smith intersected with all these historic trends and shares the epic exploits that he and other mountain men took part in while exploring and mapping the American West.Resources Related to the PodcastBob's last appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #469 — How Valley Forge Turned the Tide of the Revolutionary WarAoM article about mountain menAoM Podcast #681: The Epic Exploits of Kit CarsonHugh Glass
51:0817/06/2024
Dad's Essential Role in Making Kids Awesome

Dad's Essential Role in Making Kids Awesome

As compared to mothers, fathers are sometimes thought of as a secondary, almost superfluous, parent.But my guest says that fathers actually saved the human race, and continue to do so today.Anna Machin is an evolutionary anthropologist, a pioneer of fatherhood science, and the author of Life Of Dad. Today on the show, we talk about the role of fathers in human history and how their main role continues to be teaching kids the skills they need to take risks, become independent, and navigate the world beyond their family. We also talk about the physiological changes that happen when a man becomes a father and how dads are just as biologically primed as mothers to parent. In the second half of our conversation, we talk about the experience of being a dad. Anna shares how long it typically takes a man to bond with a baby and transition into the role of fatherhood, how roughhousing is key in building that bond as well as developing your child's resilience, and how your personality and background will affect your parenting. We end our conversation with the difference in how the relationship between Mom and Dad affects how they parent, and the implications of that for building a strong family.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Article: The Importance of Fathers (According to Science)AoM Article: A Man’s Guide to Pregnancy — Getting Ready for the Baby BombAoM Article: A Man’s Guide to Pregnancy — Your Progeny Enters the WorldAoM Article:New Dad Survival Guide — The MindsetAoM Article: New Dad Survival Guide — The SkillsetAoM Podcast #119: Why Fathers Matter AoM Article: You Don’t Have to Be Your Dad — How to Become Your Family’s Transitional CharacterConnect With Anna MachinAnna's websiteAnna on XAnna on IG
47:4412/06/2024
The Laws of Connection — The Scientific Secrets of Building Stronger Relationships

The Laws of Connection — The Scientific Secrets of Building Stronger Relationships

Everyone has heard about the incredible benefits that come to mind, body, and spirit from having strong relationships. The quality of our social ties has a huge impact on our physical and mental health and our overall feeling of flourishing.Yet many people still struggle to create these strong relationships in their lives, and often figure that things like weakening communities and digital technology are to blame.But my guest says that the barriers to establishing bonds with others may actually be more psychological than physical, and he shares research-backed tips for breaking through them in his new book, The Laws of Connection: The Scientific Secrets of Building a Strong Social Network. Today on the show, David discusses how we can feel lonely even when we're surrounded by people if we don't have what he calls a "shared reality." We then discuss ways to build that shared reality with others. We talk about why frenemies are so bad for you, how to overcome the "liking gap," why you might want to interrupt someone to connect with them, the need to be aware of the novelty penalty in conversations, why you should stop telling white lies, and much more.Resources Related to the PodcastDavid's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #803 — How Your Expectations Can Change Your LifeAoM Article: Why Ambivalent Relationships Are Terrible for You (And How to Deal With Them)AoM Podcast #949: Envy — Unpacking The Emotion No One Likes to Talk AboutConnect With David RobsonDavid's websiteDavid on IGDavid on XDavid on LinkedIn
50:4510/06/2024
Remembering D-Day 80 Years Later

Remembering D-Day 80 Years Later

On D-Day, June 6, 1944, 160,000 troops participated in the invasion of Normandy. Today just a few thousand of these veterans are still alive, with the youngest in their late nineties. As their voices, and those of the million combatants and leaders who swept into motion across Europe 80 years ago, fall silent and pass from living history, Garrett Graff has captured and compiled them in a new book: When the Sea Came Alive: An Oral History of D-Day.Drawing on his project of sifting through and synthesizing 5,000 oral histories, today Garrett takes us back to what was arguably the most consequential day in modern history and helps unpack the truly epic sweep of the operation, which was hard to fathom even then, and has become even more difficult to grasp with the passage of time. We talk about how unbelievably involved the planning process for D-Day was, stories you may never have heard before, a couple of the myths around D-Day, and the sacrificial heroism born of this event that continues to live on.Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast Episode #1: We Who Are Alive and RemainAoM Article: The 70th Anniversary of D-Day — Remembrances from the Brave Men Who Were ThereAoM Podcast #514: Remembering D-Day 75 Years LaterThe Bedford Boys: One American Town's Ultimate D-day Sacrifice by Alex KershawAoM Article: How Eisenhwoer Made the D-Day DecisionThe Only Plane in the Sky: An Oral History of 9/11 by Garrett M. GraffConnect With Garrett GraffGarrett's website
51:1005/06/2024