In a perfect world, we’d be drinking Arnold Palmers out of reusable straws while reading BSC books in preparation for our weekly recording. HOWEVERRRRRR, dumb necessary jobs, moving houses, family obligations, and oh yeah, a pandemic, have really put a cramp in our podcasting plans. Farts. Give a listen to what Esme has to say for the full 411.

A hundred year old diary!? Sign us up! Mal is also on the case, with help from Madame Kristin and Buddy Barrett. We also discuss the People’s Court, crushes on teachers, and why we like a mystery. If this all sounds random—you are correct—but like a mystery, it ALL comes together in the end.

We are dibbly stoked to again welcome a special guest, novelist Robin Benway! We discuss writing, diabetes representation, and the McGills’ divorce, of course! Side trails lead us to supportive friendships, the kind of divorce processes that help kids thrive, and what kind of feminist is Mrs. McGill, anyway? Also a brief discussion of the weird fruit-and-creme twinkies of the late 1980s.

This book was BORING, and we don’t even have Anne to bring the fun. Esme and Emily do their best to punch it up and understand the “plots” of this snoozer. We do another BSC Big 5 and we discuss Reagan and his influence over Hollywood, though. Nothing magical here, Jessi or otherwise.

We are very excited to welcome special guest Sue Ding, creator of the fabulous documentary The Claudia Kishi Club! It’s a bummer of a book, of course, but such a classic, we were excited to discuss it with her and hear all about her Claudia expertise. We discuss the grief and dying process as portrayed in Stoneybrook, and Emily lightens it up with a soupcon of latent sexism and annoying Logan behavior. Viva Mimi!

We are stumbling to the end of 2020 like all of you! At least we get a little detour to fancy summer camp! We talk about camp in culture, fake “Indian-ness,” and dangerous ideas about asylums and murderers. And oh! The heteronormativity! Guest appearance by a leaf blower. Happy New Year, Stoneybrookers!

What. The. Logan. We are all pretty disgusted with him, especially Emily (surprise!). Apparently beefing it in middle school baseball is all the rationale you need for being a jerk when your girlfriend’s kitten is MISSING. Luckily, Anne cheers us up with a top ten of famous cats.

Everyone, the dads in Stoneybrook SUUUUUUUUUUUCK and—surprise!—Emily has some thoughts about it! We dive into queer theory and Kristy’s question of “what makes a family?” as we meet Emily Michelle and discuss Anne’s affinity for all things carnival-related.

Three Californians discuss visiting their home state from the East Coast and wanting to go back. Oh, and Dawn is there in this book. This one is a fun romp into stereotypes of CA and what legitimately makes it great. Bring on the avocado and spider plants!

Jessi takes care of approximately one thousand animals and the BSC learns about democracy… or do they? We get another great Kristy apology, Anne teaches us about advertising, and we learn about her trypophobia (but it does NOT apply to candy). Also, we recover from our relief that our US election was finally called (in a non-fascist direction!).

Why doesn’t Linda Arnold notice that her identical twins are pissed? Thank goodness Mallory can come to the rescue! We discuss twin talk, piercings, and the now-dead teenage pastime of cruising the malls. Ah. The mall. We can practically smell the Mrs. Fields cookies—oh, and Wet Seal is right around the corner from the Hot Dog on a Stick. Page us when you get there!

Kristy sees cute boy. Bart is hot. They play softball. This is the level of discourse on this episode, so be forewarned. We discuss kids and sports, Title IX, and the fact that Gabbie Perkins is a TWO YEAR OLD playing softball. Honestly, though? We loved this one.

Poor Claudia gets stuck baby-sitting a practical joker and it turns out her pranks are decidedly NOT funny. (“Oh haha… YOU BROKE MY LEG.”) Anne and Emily grill Esme on what the F is up with Betsy Sobak. Are practical jokes inherently antisocial? Also, Anne relives a little of her golden age at ELLEgirl and we discuss both punk’d and Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul. This book is weird, unless you like fake vomit and dribble glasses.

How dangerous was New York in 1988, really? We discuss failed federal and city policies that lead to the McGills needing to band together with their neighbors on the Upper West Side to solve the homelessness crisis on their own. Also, what factors predict healthier outcomes when young teens have bouts of friendship jealousy (looking at you, Laine and Claudia!). The Hard Rock Cafe WAS cool (much cool than rat tails), and we bring you another BSC Big Five!

Well, look who’s here—Cokie Mason finally shows up so she and Grace can fail the Bechdel test while the BSC is just trying to have a fun Halloween! Emily teaches us about the origins of the term “Tomboy” (spoiler: it’s bad news), we look at ancient psych research showing that people who are superstitious are basically defective, and it’s Halloween in Stoneybrook, so guess what? Anne has some thoughts on candy.

We have another great guest! We are joined by playwright/writer Jeff Augustin, who knows a thing or two about being Black in New England. We discuss Ann M. Martin’s crusade for inclusion of all kids, the dangers of equating different types of oppression, and whether or not Jessi is… too perfect. Jeff is very into the chunky sweaters and does a little dance when we reveal that AMM is gay. Also, Esme and Anne try to convince Jeff and Emily that rat tails actually were very cool. (Seriously.)

You all will be shocked (shocked!), but Emily has some thoughts on pageants. Why do all the girls get so competitive and how is pageant coaching at all relevant to baby-sitting? Jeff finally sails back home to sunny Califooornia and Dawn and Sharon are crushed. Oh, and Anne gives us a history lesson on an asshole that stole a woman’s idea and made millions off of it: one Xavier Roberts. Listen up! Tell your friends!

HELLLLLLLLLLLLO, Mallory! Welcome aboard! Mal (and Jessi!) finally join the club, but boy, the members of the BSC sure don’t make it easy. We discuss racial identity development in Stoneybrook, the racist structures of 1988 and today, and the audacity of Mal’s whitesplaining of the concept of “soy sauce” to Claudia. Also, why do girls love horses? Who were the Wandering Frog People? And a theme song for “Whoops!” (finally).

Start spreadin’ the neeews—Stacey’s going back to the Big Apple! We discuss the effect of moving on kids and also the role personality plays in both moving and salespersonship, which leads Emily to lament their correlating of capitalism and intelligence in this book. Also, are the Pikes just acting out Cold War hysteria on their poor French neighbors? Lastly, Anne takes a deep deep dive on one of Stacey’s fantasy candies, root beer barrels.

IT’S THE FIRST SUPER SPECIAL! Truth be told—this was weirder than we remember and we decide that the Super Specials take place in some kind of BSC alternate reality. Emily/Dawn wasn’t feeling it, especially about how cruises are bad for the environment (like, horrible) and local economies. But, still—best friends, adventures, Disney World. Let’s allow ourselves to live in the fantasy, shall we? Cue the ship horn! And, P.S. The boys on this cruise are the worst.

Claudia’s an ARTIST, people. A real artist. The baby-sitters just don’t GET IT. At least ASHLEY WYETH does. We discuss ambition and work-as-identity and the way these things prop up the capitalist system. Is Ashley a revolutionary or a Sheryl Sandberg? Can a thirteen year old girl be a mansplainer? And why is Ashley’s prairiecore fashion sense such a problem?

You guys!!! This isn’t about snobs, it’s about LOUIE DYING. Sobsobsob. That said, we get to hear a lot about the weird attributes of high-end Stoneybrook homes, have some more strict gender binary attitudes for dogs, and Esme gets to explain negative reinforcement (trust us, it’s very exciting). Also, another listener gets to find out their BSC Big 5!

We have our first guest! We are joined by teen/kid novelist and political organizer Melissa Walker to discuss teen romance (both believable and not), because here comes Logan Bruno from “Luevulle”! From Logan being too confident to analyzing Mary Anne’s behavior as shyness or social anxiety, we ponder questionable adolescent behavior. And who exactly is Mary Anne’s favorite group, Smash, based on?

Whooooooooo… Heeeeeelp me… oh, hey! We didn’t see you there. Not much happens in this book, but we do dive into why people like getting scared and how it’s dangerous to conflate mentally ill people with crime and, apparently, ghosts. Also, Anne takes the DEEPEST dive into who Cam Geary was based on. You don’t want to miss it. 

Follow Stacey on her romantic roller coaster from Scott the man lifeguard (depicted by cover artist Hodges Soileau as at least 37 years old) to Toby the “hilarious” 14 year old (“perfect!”). Mary Anne is pissed, and reasonably so. Also, more on what is the deal with those Pikes? Mother’s helpers v. parents’ helpers, and was Ann M. Martin trying to dismantle evolutionary psychology’s sexual preference hypotheses?

We all get hit with all the feels in the episode. Love Mimi. Love Janine. Love sisters. Hate transphobia about Louie the collie—let him (Or her? Or them?) be! Also, we create a “BSC Big Five” personality assessment to help a listener figure out which baby-sitter(s) she is, and Anne goes on a both a long junk food rant (of course) and into a fanfic wormhole (more Janine… and Charlie Thomas! Steamy!). 

We attempt to resolve one of the great contradictions of Esme’s life: hating make-up and other feminizing societal constraints and also being obsessed with weddings: Em blames Kristy. So many questions abound in this episode: How heteronormative *IS* this book? Why does Watson have three toaster ovens? Also is Stacey’s mom… Stacy’s Mom?

Emily cries a lot because her childhood memory of herself as Dawn is even more accurate than expected. Oh, the emotional labor! We are fired up about a lot of things in this episode, including the white washing of 1700s Connecticut and class wars in Stoneybrook (spoiler: they’re between rich white people). And hey, was Dawn hinting at global climate change, or just being a Californian?

Braids and penny loafers begone! Mary Anne steps up and out in her debut. Has her dad’s sexual frustration been contributing to her imprisonment? Maybe, but it’s probably just the patriarchy, flourishing like it does best: in Reagan-era suburban Connecticut. Anne blames Claudia for the pettiness, and Dawn finally shows up. 

We were all three dehydrated from happy tears after watching nearly five hours of the Netflix "Baby-sitters Club" series. Here’s what we thought about it all. Spoilers abound! Not a spoiler: we frickin’ LOVED IT.

Bad girls and good girls—pitting us against each other just lets the men win, ladies. Fad doctors, intrigue, stealing Charlie and Sam Thomas’s cassette tapes, and the complex emotions of one Kristin Amanda Thomas. Stacey’s debut is a freaking delight. But white chocolate? Why?!?

In which Emily defends the Phantom Phone Caller and demands his freedom, we unpack whether or not boys really do tease girls they like (and if they should), and Anne leans on both her professional training as a writer and her Japanese heritage to write Claudia a haiku as Trevor Sandborne.