We made it to December 2021! And we all know what is around the corner: first we will stress to new levels, maximize eating, and all-around “holly jollying”, leaving little time for working out, meditation, or other restorative practices. Then suddenly on December 31 we will make resolutions for healthy eating, regular workouts, and magically becoming the well-balanced people we always want to be. Finally, by January 31 we will realize how hard it is to be, or become those people, we will lose steam, then confidence and eventually all motivation . . . We invite you to plan NOW. How are you going to reach out to others to keep you from over-extending yourself in negative ways in December to avoid a major mountain to climb in January? Even if you already have a major mountain to climb, who can you reach out to NOW to create a your tribe to be there when you fall to help you right back up?Let’s don’t fall into the trap of the artificial calendar mindset - there is no magic about “holiday season eating/drinking” or December 31st resolutions. Our minds and bodies do not know the difference between 12/31 and 1/1. instead let’s respect our minds and bodies as best we can each day to avoid the major ups and downs. Roller coasters can be thrilling - yet not in the cold winter months, and not with our health. Plus, our health isn’t well-served when it's treated like a thrill ride. It’s precious. So once you start thinking about who you know that would be a great member of your tribe, remember this too: Liz is now a certified health and wellness coach, who is super-authentic, non-judgemental, fun (and funny), and she’s been there where you may be right now. Feel free to reach out to her directly with questions and ideas as well, at [email protected].

Today’s guest is Wanjiku! Thank you Wanjiku for sharing your time and advice with us and the many out there who will love your story. You are a role model for all who might be hesitant to create their path and believe in it. Who might find they took a path that doesn’t end up feeling right . . . feeling stuck. Wanjiku articulates how she acknowledges and goes after what she wants, how she connects with others and asks for what she needs, and finally gets herself unstuck by pivoting - yes even she has had to hit the brakes and shift gears from time to time! Do you have the courage to press on the brake? Say, hmmmmm this isn’t what I thought it would be and shift yourself onto a new path? Are you always optimistic that things will work out? Do you create connections with others? She does! And look at her thrive! We hope you enjoy our conversation with Wanjiku and it inspires you to find your podium or platform, even if only as a role model to others.

Today we have a guest, Graciela! Thank you Graciela for sharing your time and advice with us and the many out there who will love your story. You are a role model for all who might be hesitant to embrace their inner wisdom. Who may be looking around and find themselves in the minority. Graciela articulates how she embraces sitting in the muck of fear, recognizing that while uncomfortable, that is the space of growth. And generally, fear is really about “saving face” more than anything. Do you recognize your anger, frustration or yucky stuck feelings as fear? Do you sit with your fear? Do you challenge it so that it shrinks? She does! And look at her thrive! We hope you enjoy our conversation with Graciela and it inspires you to just keep moving forward too.

We all have the ability to find and listen to our inner coach. Coaches learn that a key component to successful coaching is to authentically believe and continually remember that the client is resourceful. Regardless of how big a mess, how little confidence, or how guilt-ridden and confused a client may show up with us as, we must believe and remember that the client is resourceful. Otherwise we become a rescuer and they become co-dependent, when what we say we ultimately want in a coachee is success and confidence to move forward via independent-thinking. How might this coaching tip help you in daily personal and professional life? Reflect on these questions: Would your days be different if you knew your kids/partner/team members were resourceful? If your days would be different, then how would you be different? Do you believe your squad is resourceful? How do you know? Have you given them space, patience and trust to try? If yes, and they have yet to succeed, have you talked about it together and tried it again differently? And yet again? Do you understand that even when newbies are indeed resourceful, learning something new takes time and is messy - or are you expecting fast and perfect? Were you always fast and perfect? Where might that expectation come from if it exists? Did you start running before you crawled or walked? If yes, congratulations - you are one in a million! Are you OK with others being resourceful in their own ways or are you expecting them to be resourceful in your way? Can you enjoy the experience of watching them try new things, be brave and learn from their experiments as a chemistry teacher would? Will you jump up and down to celebrate with high-fives all around when they accomplish “the thing” in their own way in their own time? Or will you be disappointed, sad, lonely or some other ugh description? Why? Is there anything that scares you about just BEING there to help others learn to be resourceful? Are you ready for your squad to be successful, independent-thinking humans with confidence to move forward? Or are you not ready for that . . . and so you self-sabotage your and their attempts? We invite you to reflect on these questions so that you can start to understand how much of “Mom-overwhelm” is a real gap in your squad’s resourcefulness and how much is “Mom-neediness to be needed”. All of the above applies to leaders as well - do you really have “Leader-overwhelm” or are you suffering from “Leader-neediness to be needed” in this chaotic uncertain world? Here’s a term for you to ponder if you haven’t already: VUCA world. VUCA stands for Volatile, Uncertain, Complex and Ambiguous. That sounds like a perfect description of this pandemic world, right??? It was a term first used in 1987 . . . We look forward to hearing your thoughts.

Imposter Syndrome seems to be a theme among our successful female clients (and each of us) so we explore it today. Why do we give this term so much weight and control over the way we should BE or show up in a role? What is it really? And is it really a thing? From Oxford Languages, the definition of IMPOSTER is “a person who pretends to be someone else in order to deceive others, especially for fraudulent gain”.In our experience, successful women are neither attempting to be deceitful nor attempting to gain by means of fraud. We explore examples in profession and life while attempting to successfully raise teens and tweens - ARGH! Even more importantly, the word syndrome sounds so clinical, serious and chronic. Let us not take on syndromes, which are not really disease classification syndromes and make more of them than they really are - Imposter Syndrome is a label someone made up to speak to a theme. It is not a formal syndrome. So let’s not turn it into one by self-diagnosing. Isn’t this really about getting comfortable with new? Haven’t we all done this many other times in our lives and succeeded, such as moving from 8th Grade to Freshman in high school? Or going from single to married? Or childless to parent? What tools did we use then? And what of those same tools can we use now? Or did we really all believe ourselves when we were little and believed that saying, “I can’t wait to grow up because then I will know everything and get to make all the rules.” We now know that isn’t true - so why do we still expect as adults that we will get to a point of comfort where we know everything? And possess all control because we get to make all the rules? We never get there. It’s time to get comfortable with discomfort! Liz’s marathon was physically challenging and uncomfortable - yet rather than creating physical wellness it taught her she is mentally stronger than she ever would have believed. What a paradox! I wonder if we would still be speaking of Imposter Syndrome if we began to recognize that being uncomfortable is a sign of growth - and that if we are going to continually seek to “grow up” and “know everything” (or at least more) we must perpetually be uncomfortable? And it we aren’t willing to consistently be uncomfortable aren’t we just sitting in our comfort zones? The risk may be if we sit there for too long we are actually stagnating, plateauing, and getting stale while the rest of the world passes us by. If that’s what it takes not to feel like an imposter we’d rather be IMPOSTERS and see what more there is to learn and explore in this big world! How about you?

Today we acknowledge we can be MESSY and still accomplish great things! We are finding that just being part of the race (literally and figuratively) is sometimes what counts the most. And then we dig into the “What If’s”. Especially at work, what if we re-think professional behavior? What if we really welcome inclusion to support personal expression of engaging in work at home and work. As Liz would say, “How do we put “our crazy” in our purses and go to work?”. How can we recognize that all others have put “their crazy” in their purses to go to work too - how to make that all more relaxed in a time of fear and panic in our world? What are companies so afraid of? Shorter-term versus long-term thinking of corporate success are real questions being raised all over the world today. How are you as a leader or a company sorting through these issues and making proactive choices? If nothing else we can radically recognize small things all the time - in us, and in others, and show appreciation. And tell everyone proactively that this is now how we are going to be, behave and show up. What do you think? We are moving forward!

Today our theme is in relation to our brains wanting to be “on” full-time, including at night. What can balance our overactive, hyper-sensitive to “what if” minds? Moving our bodies. Whether walking, stretching, crawling or other - move, move, move to clear your head and create new perspectives. Other ways to create new perspectives include mimicking what children know and do. They play, draw, color, create, imagine . . . What if you were to do those things too? If nothing else, you might lighten up. Wouldn’t that feel nice for a change? What are you experimenting within your health and wellness journey? As Liz says, each of our journeys is highly individualized. Let us know your tips and instigating mindset tricks used to reach the goals you didn’t think possible previously. We are in this together. Have a good one!

Have you ever been so frustrated at work or life and wanted to scream - “I don’t even have time to think!?!?” We have! Today we experiment with a simple yet not so easy (and hardly ever practiced) methodology of creating a Thinking Environment, based off of Nancy Kline’s research highlighted in her “Time to Think” book series. So the methodology can be summarized as: if you really want to do your best thinking and build your muscle to think for yourself well, then find a Thinking Partner. The Thinking Partner’s job is to listen well by providing a safe space for you to think out loud. The Thinking Partner, or Listener has a very hard job - they must keep their eyes on the Thinker and be as still and quiet as possible. The Listener only prompts the Thinker, as needed, to continue with a question like, “and what more?” or “and what else?” . . . This is a perfect example of sounds easy/does hard. I heard a few weeks ago that LISTEN and SILENT have the same letters - wow - remember it! If you want to be a good Listener you must be silent. Mute yourself if you have to. Respect the other person with your silence so they can hear their thoughts without distraction from your voice, or another question you want to assault them with, or your advice - ugh! The big secret is, NO ONE really wants advice. Our human brains do not want commands - and you have not, nor will you ever experience that other person’s life. So don’t pretend that your experience can help them with their unique experience. That’s why our brains thrive on questions. They love to explore, discover and create - create their own ideas, their own experiments to move forward, and discover their own life lessons bottled up inside. So, offer 5 minutes of a Thinking Environment to someone you know and see how it goes. Ask someone to partner with you as a Listener and see what comes up. If nothing else, you will be able to say, I had 5 minutes to think today! Woo hoo! If you really want a challenge as someone younger if they would like to think out loud for 5 - oh the lessons you will learn . . .

❤️In this episode we announce we are taking the plunge! We decided to go for it. We have agreed to be even more credible as health executives. We began journeys to become Health and Wellness certified coaches. Oh jeez - a new level of pressure!!! Now we are super accountable at a time when it’s so stinking hard to be accountable to anything! And we are accountable to each of you - because our main goal in all of this is to have you know that you are not alone in your struggles. We also hope to inspire you when possible - if we can do this, then you can do anything you are secretly thinking about for your health and wellness too. We are ready. We are tired of sitting back doing too much work with our minds - ruminating. It’s now time to get back to our bodies. In fact, our bodies lead the way to calm minds. What about yours? We invite you to join us in our journeys! Please do check-in to see how we are doing all along the way.

Gwen and Liz of #InstigationWomenPlusFriends are joined by special guest Whitney Casares, MD, MPH, FAAP, from Modern Mommy Doc. She's a board-certified pediatrician, author of The Working Mom Blueprint, speaker, and full-time working mom. She's a boots on the ground advocate for the success of women in the workplace and at home.We discuss putting yourself at the center of your own life in order to live in alignment with your priorities and goals. Topics include juggling work and life, transparency in the workplace, child care, household roles, employee resource groups, and more. We hope you enjoy this episode!

Well, we’ve slipped ladies. . . Per The New York Times (NYT) article “The Pandemic Created a Child-Care Crisis. Mothers Bore the Burden.” and many other articles and papers we read this week, we have significantly slipped as a percentage of the workforce over the last year. According to the NYT, “In January 2019, women achieved a milestone: They made up more of the work force than men. The pandemic erased that status in a matter of weeks. And just as it took decades to achieve, it could take years to regain. Now, 56 percent of American women are working for pay, the lowest level since 1986.” 1986???? We were in Middle School/High School in 1986! It was counter-cultural for our Mom’s to be working in the 80’s - and the general professional opportunities were limited to categories such as teacher, nurse, secretary, etc.. We see so much press on raising hourly rates and starting bonuses. Some companies are paying interviewees just to interview. Are these the only solutions? What are the real issues? Does it matter the hourly wage is if a parent does not have daycare or school open for children? Does it matter if flexibility is the number one need to re-enter the workforce? We are happy to see another article this week from the NYT, “A new coalition of 200 businesses will push fixes to the problems of child and elder care”. The article describes what some employers are trying to do about the issues by creating a council. About the TIME’S UP Care Economy Business Council: The Care Economy Business Council is a coalition of large corporations, small businesses, entrepreneurs, and investors that is working with TIME’S UP to: Shift the cultural narrative around who is responsible for care; Encourage and enforce equitable practices to support caregivers in their own workplaces and the private sector; Rally investment in innovative solutions to fix the caregiving crisis; and Advocate for key public policy interventions to move us towards more fair and equitable workplaces for all. We are assembling an incredible coalition of companies – spanning every industry – to push for the creation of a comprehensive care infrastructure at this critical moment. Together, we can reimagine the world of care, support caregivers of all kinds, and build workplaces that are more fair and equitable for everyone. Click here to see if companies that you purchase from or work for are on the list. Kudos to these companies for seeking collaborative and creative solutions! Business Seek to Help Female Caregivers Return to Workforce - https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/19/bu.... If you want to re-enter the workforce do not assume it’s impossible. Please speak up and ask for what you need - companies struggle to offer solutions when they don’t know of your real struggles. It never hurts to ask!

On our one year anniversaries of our respective companies we get a little “whackadoodle” today. Yes we go there: What secrets are you hiding from others? From yourself? What promises did you make long ago - to yourself? Are they promises you can keep? Are they healthy? When you react to others in ways you aren’t proud of is it because they are breaking those promises you made for you - which they haven’t made for themselves? Do they even know they are saddled with these promises? What’s really going on when we think we are controlling others for their own good? Music for the week: Album “Mirage” by The Killers! And today’s best song to dance to/pretend you are singing to yourself - “Dying Breed”. Go dance and wonder what Mirages you have created. Can you forgive yourself for pretending? Do you realize you are pretending? Who else knows? Can you forgive others for not taking on your mirages too?Have a great one everyone!

What do we do to protect ourselves from embarrassment? Why? Do you actively decide to quit and run away? Or laugh at yourself? It’s your choice - what is your superpower to work through these questions? Listen and learn from the best dorks and suckers around!

"Re-Emerging", "Re-Entry", "New normal", "Back to normal", "Back to work", "Spring Break", and "Summer Break", are all things we are thinking about . . . Are we taking the time to reflect proactively and fully appreciating that this will be hard? This will be uncomfortable? That not everyone will have our same pace or perspective? And that “new normal” means that we have permission to create some “new” - without assuming that everything will just or should just auto go-back-to-the-way-things-were pre-March 2020? When in doubt you’ve got to just get in the mix! Live your life! Don’t stand around doubting or questioning yourself - AND talk about it with others to help yourself and everyone around you re-open effectively with re-defining normal. It is time to ask questions - so that you are able to effectively get in the mix of life with zest! Let us know what you are doing to help yourself, your family/friends, your co-workers/team to re-open in 2021!

We are always talking about our roles and our priorities. Sometimes we take great pride in how we are able to take care of everyone else. We wear our good deeds to others like badges of honor. We create titles: mom, wife, partner, chief, director, VP, President . . . We even create holidays - Mother’s Day! Bosses Day! And then we are lost when the kids are gone, or we aren’t at work, or when there are transition moments. What about Self Day? Why don’t we create self time on our calendar (or at least without feeling guilty about it)? Is it because we are too busy? Is it because we are a lower priority than everything else in life? Or is it that we have learned that “Self” has many bad connotations attached to it such as SELFISH! while SELFLESS is judged as good - or at least right. Let us not forget that we cannot be any good or do any good for others without first being good and doing good for ourselves. It’s just not possible. And if this sounds selfish, create a new word for it - whatever helps you value putting time for YOUR SELF on your calendar sans guilty thoughts. Self time is the first and most important gift to others because it ensures that you will be able to sustain your practice of gift-giving to them - so let others be a little selfish wanting you to energize and calm with self time so they can experience you in new, fun and creative ways. So this Friday, let’s just BE . . . OUR . . . SELVES

We are starting to try some new video styles with our IWF community. First, we will work to shorten the videos into bite-sized chunks. Everyone likes a little snack occasionally, right? Plus we are going to select a topic by telling a true story - sometimes funny/sometimes not. Our goal is to be authentic and let you know we’ve been there/done lots of things before too. . . we just love the dot. . . dot . . . dot . . . it leaves so much open to be pondered and explored! Sometimes our stories end in regret. Yet whether celebrated or regretful endings, all lead to important learnings and unlearnings. So that’s what we hope to share: our crazy days throughout these crazy times that are flying by so crazy fast! Please learn through us!!! This episode focuses on our mama drama . . . lots more to come. Happy Friday friends!

Either a MUST SEE or an I CAN’T BEAR TO SEE episode about our #cultureofpretty and our #cultureofconformity - or is it? Do we feel the need to be pretty as women due to culture and the expectations put upon us by others? Or do we focus on our exterior because it is part of our armour? Or have we just learned that our exterior self impacts how we feel about ourselves and vice versa? Or is an “exterior fix” just another example of our “fast-fix-culture” - it’s just plain easier and faster (albeit not necessarily healthier) to buy a product or service to quickly transform our hair, skin, complexion, nails, etc. - like magic! So much easier and faster than doing the real inner work to continue to refine ourselves as art - as beauty - from the inside - remembering that true beauty is in the eye of the beholder. How do we view ourselves - as objects with aspirations to achieve Perfect Pretty? or as ever-evolving and transforming art in which we will be more and more at peace with once we can fully appreciate our own inner beauty. Happy Friday friends!

Today we reflect on the past to get creative about intentionally building connections and creating “normalcy” when it’s not so easy these days . . . Ideas we came up with to mind-hack “Normalcy’: -Just show up! You are enough - no pressure or expectation . . . take it in and enjoy -What replicates your former life (personal or professional) physically? Likely it has something to do with movement. So, how about: -1 minute walks between each “zoom session” - or make it 10 and have a 3 minute cell phone “check in” with someone you like or miss while you walk between sessions. Each minute throughout the day can add up and make you feel a bit more “normal”. -Jump! On a ball or mini trampoline or just on the floor -Concerts - we miss them!!!!! How about sharing a concert in your home or with others virtually via YouTube, Music Apps, Live-Streams . . . many bands miss them as much as we do and are creating new ways to connect with their fans. Have you tried? -“New” places - go mobile! Who says you are tied to your “workstation”. Have you used your laptop, ipad, phone to move around wherever you like within your home or outside your home (or at the mall/museum/gym), etc.? -Some of us struggle with the winter grey anyway - this one is a doozy of a winter! Have you invested in a sun lamp? A sun alarm? A virtual screen on your computer? -Games - we love games! Have you played virtual games on-screen with other families or extended families or households? If not games, how about wine-tasting? Or other?-Kids chores - they may be cranky anyway. So how about new ways for them to pitch in or take ownership of something important like meal-time to show them you trust them with something important. You may have a few moments of learning and a few laughs along the way : ) -PERSPECTIVE: No matter how you feel about right now as a person, mother, partner, friend, etc. . . think back. What if this same situation had happened when you were a young child. Would your mother or those who raised you be better in the same circumstance? We dare say, not likely. Yet if so, what would it have been like? What can you try to replicate “better”, whatever that means to you? And if indeed now - Yey You!!!! Bask in the realization that you are doing great! -Pick out some song lyrics that speak to you - Coldplay is Gwen’s go-to. From their song “Everyday Life” a partial line says something like, “We are the future of history”. Remember, the history books aren’t pretty - yet in great times we learn from history and acknowledge that we are building history for future generations. What will the history books be like with your story included? Getting better step by step? Please share your ideas and stay warm, safe and well!

We have fun updating on Gwen’s experiment with intermittent fasting and Liz’s experiment with being a “mindful groundhog”. Interesting how these things actually go together . . . each is really about finding more time by ridding ourselves of mindless distractions so that we have more time to be our individual CEO’s of ourselves. Have you ever thought about that? You are your CEO - no one else is. How would you rate yourself as the CEO of yourself? Do you spend sufficient time thinking ahead, planning, creating, and delegating? Do you have a slower peaceful pace about you that exudes confidence? Does your pace communicate safety and security to others around you? OR - do you spin at a high pace like all of the other little gears around you? Do you let the little gears around you dictate your “Big Gear” pace? What works best for you? If you aren’t sure, think about how a well-oiled machine works . . . think about the other gears, pulleys and levers . . . consider that you are and can give yourself permission to be the CEO of your “Big Gear”. You set your gear size, pace and direction - if you choose to . . . Gwen and Liz will update each week on their accountabilities as accountability buddies (AB’s) - we would love to hear how you are doing with respect to yours as well! Have a great week!

Today it feels right to talk about ACCOUNTABILITY. We are now through the first month of the new year, and we have found that it is best to have an ACCOUNTABILITY BUDDY (AB). To be most effective the buddy needs to know what we need, in what way, and how often. One of us has learned over the last week what not to do . . . DO NOT to ask a spouse/partner to be an AB for you . . . it just doesn’t work . . . and isn’t fair to the spouse/partner either. They are best when they can just be a partner, which is different from an AB. ABs sometimes have to ask the hard questions or point out that you really aren’t being very accountable. Which sparks us, yet not in a good way! We all appreciate hard ABs right? So let’s not be surprised or miffed when our ABs have to ask us the hard questions! Now let’s go do this right! Gwen is asking for accountability related to intermittent fasting to integrate body/mind/spirit more effectively to improve her overall and physical health. Liz is seeking to be a mindful groundhog - which translates to a goal to be MINDFUL about LIZ and “put her own mask on first” so she can be her best with others. Care and compassion for ourselves FIRST is our common theme. Have a great week!

Wow - a lot has changed in a week. Our country went from discussing the shock of mayhem in our capital to witnessing a peaceful transition of power on those same steps. We were a part of history by witness the swearing in of the first Woman AND first African American AND first Asian Vice-President of our country. Just like most women, Kamala wasn’t satisfied with being just one first! We love Kamala’s mantra, “I may be the first, but I’d better not be the last!”. YAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND is a key word in today’s discussion - women tend to be, by necessity or choice driven to AND a lot, if we can use AND as a verb. ANDing can drive our perfectionistic tendencies AND stress AND burnout . . . especially by continually attempting to live within the narrow bandwidth of expectation our cultures and milieus we find ourselves living in create for us. From a different perspective, Liz describes how AND can also help us receive constructive criticism which we all need in order to effectively transform and improve ourselves, yet find it so very difficult to accept as a gift. We often find feedback downright hurtful, even from those we love and trust. . . what is wrong with us??? The AND perspective to effectively receive feedback may help you today. If you watch nothing else, fast forward our video to the last 5 seconds. Remember our discussion last time about mama issues and being in the sandwich? Today you can witness a precious real-life example - we are all in this together!

Our first Episode of 2021! We talk about being in the “sandwich”. We are sandwiched in between caring for kids and parents . . . stress anyone! We dig into Mom things - what is it to be a Mom, Mommy, Momma. And boy do we have our own mama issues . . . join us to see if you share anything in common with us . . . or are we the only ones with mama issues? Gwen’s word for 2020 was CALM. Her word for 2021 is SPARK! What is yours? How can you come up with a word or create a word that you can post, write, use as a password (or part of a secure password) to remind you throughout the year of how you want to show up in the world this year? Not a resolution - a reminder of a better you! As always, please share your thoughts! Happy 2021 everyone!

Our last Episode of 2020! We are transforming - are you? We reflect on “It’s Normal to Shake as you Soar” The essential guide to living at the intersection of Joy and Purpose - by Shannon Cohen. #Undergirding and #Invisiblestuff are our fav quips for the week. As we bring this year of challenge and transformation to a close we remember that no one said transformation was smooth, easy, comfortable or without struggle. Frankly, if it were, would we appreciate our perseverance, learnings, and accomplishments in moving through it? Imagine a butterfly cocooning - does the butterfly cocoon to hibernate and “get through a rough period”? Then go back to life as usual? Or does it cocoon to transform to better state than we could ever imagine? Do we really want to “get back to normal” in the autopilot trance many of us were lulled into pre-2020? Not us! We are resolved to create - out with the old! We are going to rock 2021 by moving forward in brand new ways!We also explore questions like, what if we fast forward and need to be told we are whacka-doodle???? All scenarios required trusted relationships and transparent, respectful dialogue in loving, safe environments. . . find someone or something you can trust . . . just one person so you are not on an island. Be honest, be vulnerable, and learn to listen to ensure you are always at your best. Speaking of that, we are committed to connect with this community by beginning to offer live sessions in January 2021. It may be once a month - it may be more. It may include guests in 2021 - it may offer opportunities for this community to chat with us real time to offer ideas and insights for our collective whole.

Does your level of cheer today put you at a Ho? A Ho-Ho? Or a Ho-Ho-Ho???? Give it some thought - your level of cheer is impacted by your ability (or lack of) being able to really talk through the issues of the day, or the Holidays, or whatever is on your mind. . . Please reach out to someone who you can let your hair down with and find your inner Ho!

Today’s key words are #christmastiedye and # alanismorissette. Liz doesn’t learn during our time together, but learns here with all of you that she is most like celebrity mother Maggie Gyllenhaal! For them, life is an adventure, but they always seem to keep calm and cool. Their low-key approach to life allows their children to enjoy themselves, while still learning the tools necessary to be successful - AWE! Funny that Liz thought she would be most like Alanis Morrisette - the badass who knows when to push forward and when to pull back, while having kids in her forties and a broadway show based upon her album, Jagged Little Pill - what women they all are!!!!! Yey! Meanwhile Gwen gets curious and does her own celebrity mom quiz. Results? Kim Kardashian West - really???? Just because she likes wine and cheese - hmmmm : ) Anyway, this is all for fun and laughs. Want to try? visit brainfall.com Lessons for the week: laughter really is the best medicine, be audacious - it’s fun and empowering, view everything as a choice - you are making choices all day everyday, and shift your language from “I have to . . . “ to “I get to . . . “ and see what a difference it makes.Now we get to spend the rest of the month at home with our families and enjoy our holiday seasons without “having” to leave the house - what a gift!!!!! What do you get to do???? Please share

Today we goat yoga to relieve stress and have fun. . . drop the mic. Want to join?

We are reflecting today in #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 12 as the holidays ahead seem to be taking a stressful toll on everyone. How can we work on mental resilience? How can we work through the holidays if we cannot gather as friends and family in 2020? What positive coping mechanisms can we come up with to share for all? How to we transition from the togetherness of the holidays to enjoying some aloneness without being lonely . . . is it possible?Do you have a woe timer? How do you vent? How do you focus on gratitude rather than fear and woes? And when all else fails can you rely on humor - like how often do we really floss our teeth? Yet what do we tell the dentist? We want to hear from you - please share with all!

Well . . . we made it to the week of the aftermath of the election. In #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 11 we focus on healing, listening to understand, and “becoming wizened” as Liz would say - only Liz! We hope you find a few tips in this episode to begin the healing process. As we head toward Thanksgiving, and the holidays in general, it has never been more important to lean on love and understanding with others, and gratitude for what we have - as individuals, families, communities and as a country - collectively. One method of healing, based on Ho’oponopono is the gentle Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness. Anytime we experience conflict or a problem we are to say to ourselves, “I forgive you. Thank you. I’m sorry. And I love you.” It works - how? We are not sure . . . Another trick is to reflect on what you believe in, have faith in, and/or are grateful for. When you spend a few minutes each day focussing on these fundamentals, you can pull them up for yourself to remember anytime you hit a low point in your day. And when you list out what you believe in, make sure YOU are on the list. You have been successfully through so much yourself in this life already - so why not believe in yourself now! Tell us how these ideas work for you. Add your ideas for all to enjoy in our Facebook community!❤️ Gwen and Liz

Boo! It’s time for #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 10! In our tenth episode we are coming up on Halloween and the 2020 election - whoo! We’ve got a lot going on! We talk about #vote2020, #innermentor, and #magicalmoments. We have fun “coaching” each other by dialoguing and spending time being each others’ miracles. We are each working on being unique diamonds that sparkle and spark others to do good, influence, impact and inspire all those who share our passions in life. Join us and share our vlogs to continue to grow our community! Today’s main takeaways: Make your chances and your choices, (and then take your chances by allowing yourself to sparkle), amplify your voice, and move ahead with others to have the greatest possible impact! Go change your world! ❤️ Gwen and Liz

In #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 9 we get really real. From Liz’s story about her #fullmetalbreakdown yesterday to naming our issues with #bodyimage and #selflove. Major takeaways include: the way our brain is taught as children can lead to implicit bias - it is up to us as adults to reflect on past learnings and choose whether or not to continue to apply them - or refine them - or forget them; start with ourselves and forgive; have humor - laugh together and at ourselves; and let it ride! In fact after today’s session our mantra is #girlletitride. What are you doing to: “let it ride”? bring humor and fun into your day? share laughs with others? If you do you these things you just may add years to your life - tune in to see how we are working to add years to our lives! ❤️ Gwen and Liz

In #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 8 we admit our personal vulnerabilities and feelings related to the impact of COVID-19 on women in the workforce. The detrimental impact to our national workforce and to our children’s education is real. In this episode we highlight a NYT article entitled #mothersaretheshockabsorbersofoursociety as well as the latest McKinsey and Company report on their study of the state of women in corporate America entitled #womenintheworkplace. Your respective employers can participate in the study in 2021 by signing up at https://womenintheworkplace.com/ View NYT article here: https://www.nytimes.com/2020/10/14/pa... The theme common among both pieces are that women are at risk of backsliding their positions and roles in corporate America after years of intentional progress. This is not only a gender issue - it is also a Diversity, Inclusion and Equity issue. The long-term effects may also affect the future state of our national workforce as our children risk losing months or even years of professionally-led education.Please read the article and report - we ask you to comment with all creative solutions that come to mind. If you want to take your action further, then forward the article and report to those you know in positions of authority and power to enact solutions in your respective communities. Finally, offer grace to all. Thank your colleagues and companies for doing all they can right now. Thank the teachers who are being asked to teach in ways and my methods that are suboptimal. Thank your spouses, partners and friends for supporting you through the ups and downs. Thank your kids for doing the best they can. And thank yourself for doing so much so well each and everyday! Share your stories - we love to hear from you. ❤️

In #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 7 we start by acknowledging it may be time for us to pick up the #voiceofwomen mantle, post the fresh loss of RBG and now the loss of Helen Reddy # HelenReddy #IamWoman - ugh! Two huge blows . . . if we allow them to be. Instead today we choose to discover how we can carry on by digging into our own #blindspots. We ask ourselves the tough questions about how to respectfully take up a cause, promote our voices, ask more questions, see more similarities than differences in others and get out of our own way. We acknowledge that everyone has the right to choose whether or not they join us, agree with us, or listen with us. It all starts with noticing #peopleIcantstand. Do you know any people you just can’t stand? Consider them to be part of a lesson for you to learn. We also work on #selfreflection and #undiscussables. . . interesting, huh!?! We conclude today with a funny coping skill used by Liz after the last election - tune in to laugh with us!

In #Instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 6 we reflect on, pay tribute to, learn from, and resolve to March on after Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s passing. We must all connect and support each other because we have big shoes to fill - collectively. Enough said. Plus you get to meet Liz’s alter-ego Stevie Flowers. And then don’t miss the “throwing our stuff in the trash” to close it out. In this episode we focus on: #womensrights, #RBG, #ruthbaderginsburg, #wemarchon, #dollypartonthelightofaclearbluemorning, #playingbig, #taramohr, #stevienicks, #innermentor

In #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 5 we try a concept of #walkandtalk to be creative and simply work through the emotions of fear, loss and chaos - to take action in a positive way. We also learn from #naomiosaka about how gracious winners (and leaders) share the platform of competition/life from a perspective by sharing the plenty versus from a mindset of scarcity.In this episode we focus on: #walkandtalk, #copingstrategies, #reflectonpastsuccesses, #wineyoga, #honesty, #trust, #whatcaniactuallycontrol and #mantras

In #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 4 we focus on the distribution of work at home among partners and attempt to push the boundaries toward consideration of modern creative concepts such as virtual villages, job shares and proactively asking for help. Then we dig into the book EverythingisF*cked A Book About Hope by #MarkManson. We decided to learn from the kids, play and avoid the temptation to take all of this so seriously. Take action - ask for help, raise up needs to your employer, look for ways to have fun and play, and use your power as a female consumer! Topics covered in Episode 4 include: #childbrain, #ittakesavillage, #emotioncreatesaction, #poweroffemaleconsumers

In #instigatingwomenandfriends Episode 3 you can see we are ourselves trying to reconcile women’s Equality aspirations (or at least formal statements used by systems and policy) with current state. We are also working to understand our own loud minds. As always we let you in on our own personal struggles and quests for improvement in a safe conversation. Topics covered in Episode 3 include: #nationalwomensequalityday, #equalityforwomen, #equityforwomen, #taylorswiftmadwoman, #empoweringwomen, #sherylsandbergleanin, #likeabiliitywomenleaders, #monkeybrain, #intellectualbrain, #childbrain, #clownbrain, #mindfuleating We hope you enjoy - please share your perspectives!