Michael Fletcher is a man’s man. He has run over 27 marathons and impacts thousands of men through Manna Church, located in Fayetteville, NC, on the edge of Fort Bragg. Michael is the first guest to appear on the GreatMan Podcast, and today he’s going to challenge you to fulfill your purpose as a leader and as a man. His message is clear, humorous, powerful, and shaped by a deep understanding of men. (And, who knows, maybe you’ll discover you’ve got more in common with a guy holding a rifle in a lawn chair at 16,000 feet than you ever thought possible!) For more, visit MichaelFletcher.TV.

A shooting at a synagogue, a series of pipe bombs… the violence continues to infiltrate our daily lives. If you’re a young man, in particular, it’s increasingly likely that at some point in your life you could be exposed to an act of terroristic violence: a threat in your local school, mall, restaurant, bar, church, or synagogue. It’s time that we talk about what manhood looks like in a time of crisis. What does a man do in the face of these threats? How does a man prepare himself for a crisis? Listen to this episode to set your plan of action. Don’t let fear and panic catch you off guard.

Mark your calendar! October 25 is St. Crispin’s Day, made famous by King Henry V’s rousing speech given in 1415 at the Battle of Agincourt. While we don’t know all of the actual words spoken that day, William Shakespeare filled in the gaps with his imagination nearly 200 years later in his play, Henry V. From this speech we get that immortal call to arms, “We few, we happy few, we band of brothers.” This October 25, read the speech for yourself (available here).

About 30 young men were on a discussion board looking for information that they just couldn’t find anywhere else… no fathers or brothers to talk to. Sadly, they were all completely wrong about the topic. Men, if we want to restore noble manhood, we have to foster a culture where conversations can happen. Older men, develop a culture around you in which you’re willing to share the lore of manhood. Younger men, find older, noble men who can teach you things. Nothing should be laughable or off limits. The lore of manhood doesn’t stem from locker room conversations and men’s health magazines. It’s born from a culture of noble manhood. This episode was originally published on February 20, 2018.

What does the Kavanaugh confirmation process tell us about great and noble manhood in our generation? Stephen posits that our lasting challenge is not so much the politics of left and right, but the legitimate issue that women are often abused and the people who most often abuse them are often untethered, unprincipled, and unfathered men. Gentlemen, this is not a moment to be offended, but a moment to realize that there are legitimate claims being made and society isn’t hearing them.

There are many types of pride, but the kind of pride most endemic to men is the kind that results from not receiving affirmation earlier in life. You probably know a guy like this who lives in a Palace of Self. He gets a sentence quoted in the paper and then puts the clipping on his wall and talks about it for weeks. In this episode, you’ll be challenged to take an inventory of your own self and susceptibility to pride. Furthermore, you’ll learn why a GreatMan can call out the praiseworthy features in others’ lives. Learn how to affirm men around you and strengthen the good in their lives through genuine affirmation.

Let’s talk about Kavanaugh. Not about whether or not the allegations are true or whether or not he should sit on the Supreme Court. Instead, let’s focus on how the sexual revolution of the 1960s changed manhood and on how it’s harming men who have lived all these years without a code. Society is correcting itself (as it should) through the #MeToo movement. Today, there is a reckoning. Women are right. And men are paying a price for living the unprincipled lifestyles that society urged upon them. Men, you need a code. If you don’t have guiding beliefs about how to conduct yourself, society will swallow you up.

The strength and glory of a man are exhibited when he takes responsibility. It’s at the heart of noble manhood. Owning your responsibility is more than just checking off a list of household chores. (Though that’s part of it.) Being responsible in a manly way includes taking charge in the broader sense of your “field” – that is, your relationships, obligations to community, and self. Take responsibility and prosperity will follow.

We talk often on this podcast about a man’s role in fostering a culture of noble manhood. But women also play a critical role in this area. In today’s episode, Stephen shares how his mother (and perhaps yours, too) had a special ability to articulate the world. Mothers often provide a lens through which their children view the world. While it may be your father’s example that you remember, it is likely your mother’s voice that resounds the most.

Maybe you’ve seen another guy make a stupid decision? If so, the error may not have been in the actual decision so much as the process he took to get there. Fact is, a lot of men shrink from decision. They avoid the process. They shove it in a drawer, hoping someone else will show up and make it for them. Of course, this isn’t the way YOU want to live your life. In this episode: four steps to manly decision-making. This episode starts with an exercise that every man should complete and ends with a call for humility.

Earlier this year, Stephen spoke at an event in California. Before thousands of men of all ages, he issued a challenge: men, bless your sons. One young man pulled out his phone, recorded the talk, and sent it to his father. The son received a blessing, and the experience changed their relationship. Tragically, this young man lost his life shortly after the conference while on a hiking trip. Whatever your religion, whatever your father/son relationship (even if you no longer have a father), this action of blessing is crucial. Learn how to do it in this episode.

Cowardice can make us weak, unreliable, and even dangerous. You know it when you see it, and you know it when you feel it. In this episode, you’ll learn how to identify the source of cowardice in your own life. Plus, you’ll learn tactics for eliminating cowardice so that you can become the great man you’re meant to be.

A lot of guys are working hard to serve their wives, kids, jobs, causes, etc. But it’s been a long time since they’ve read a book, been in the wild, hung out with the guys, or explored an interest. They’re bored, uninspired, overweight, exhausted, and distracted. Men, you need to create some margin in your lives. It might mean getting up earlier or setting aside one evening a week. However you structure it, find time to work on yourself first so that you can serve others.

Stephen loves chocolate cake, he has strong opinions about chocolate cake, and today he’s going to tell you about them! You see, chocolate cake is under attack in this world. (Maybe you didn’t know?) The good news is, we’ve got two choices about how we can handle this attack. Even if you live a sad, sugar-free existence, you need to hear this episode!

Many of you saw the dramatic rescue of the boys trapped in a cave in Thailand. In a similar way, we need a rescue of boys today. Boys are in free fall, and their spiral reflects what’s going on with men around the world. For most of history, civilizations fell to “barbarians from the outside.” Today, however, our greatest concern should be the “barbarians from within.” Men, let’s intervene and save our boys.

Churches are often the only organizations that budget to impact men on a regular basis. But most churches miss the mark. This week, Stephen speaks directly to men’s ministries. (Though, as always, all are welcome here in the GreatMan Podcast.) Listen in to discover how a men’s ministry should function, who’s doing it well in the U.S., and why you can’t afford to miss out on bringing in the men.

There’s a certain list of people that every man needs to make: an enemies list. This isn’t bitter or vindictive. It’s actually an experience that will help you “uncrush” the soul and increase your capacity for living a life full of love and generosity. Listen to this episode. Identify who has harmed you. (Make sure this list is real and truthful.) Then gain victory over the wounding, damaging experiences.

Throw out whatever you may think about John McCain politically. Today we’re discussing one remarkable talent McCain developed as a boy – and how it prepared him to become a leader of men years later. This one habit even inspired Stephen to create a Notes folder on his iPhone called “The McCains.” Listen in to find out what’s in the folder and how Stephen uses its contents to inspire a GreatMan culture wherever he goes.

Every man creates a culture by the way he lives. That culture can be positive or negative, constructive or destructive. If you’re listening to this episode, you’re being charged to create a culture around you in which men can bring the problems of their souls to the surface. You don’t have to be a “counselor” or have any special knowledge in psychology in order to do this. It can be really simple. All you have to do is listen and ask questions.

Most men using foul language think it makes them cool and accepted. Why? What do you think that the habit of cussing is compensating for in your soul? Don’t let cussing compensate for lack of strong character or strong manhood in your life. Don’t let cussing make you intellectually or emotionally lazy. What aren’t you saying because you rely on these easy words? In this episode, Stephen unpacks much of the psychology around cussing, while challenging men on to new heights.

There’s a connection between pornography and the sexual abuse brought to light by the #MeToo movement. Most porn depicts women as willing for anything. It portrays women as “wanting it” – to put it in a crass locker room phrasing. Women in porn are typically shown as resistant, but willing to have their virtue compromised by a man who is persistent. This causes men to believe that women need to be urged or coaxed into becoming just as willing as the men are. Men, porn is abuse training. We have a responsibility to protect, love, and nurture women. Let’s step up. Disclaimer: Parents may be advised to listen to the contents of today’s episode before sharing with children.

Suicide rates among middle-aged and older men are skyrocketing. According to a recent report from Esquire on suicide in the U.K., “…if you are a man between 20 and 49, you're more likely to die from [suicide] than cancer, road accidents or heart disease.” Gentlemen, suicide is closer to us than it’s ever been. This is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Let’s get the help we need.

Most guys have a hope that some man is going to come along and take them under his wing and teach them all the things they need to know about life. They’re waiting for superman. The reality is, the “super-mentor” or “super-dad” is not likely to show up. Good news: we can take a modular approach to mentoring. One of the arts of manhood is learning to pursue different mentors and father figures for different subjects. Men, you are not condemned to remain at whatever level you were left at when active fathering ended in your life. This episode will help you keep moving forward!

One of the things that distinguishes a mature man from an immature boy is his ability to get what he needs. Men, you’ve probably heard Stephen say this before: you need a certain amount of rowdiness and adventure in your lives. A reasonable pursuit of these things will make you a better man – for yourself and for those you lead. So, take stock of what you need. Figure out how to get it. And go after it!

We all sustain wounds in this life. But what are the messages we allow those wounds to inscribe upon our souls? Do you view an experience in your life as a profound injustice? Are you misinterpreting failures? Allowing harsh words or criticisms to define you? Where do your thoughts go when you’re alone and some memory of the past pops into your head? Men, the disease of self-pity is a cancer that can affect you on many levels. Stop. Turn. Face your past. Respond with intention.

Men are about twice as likely to become alcohol-dependent as women. They’re twice as likely to binge drink and twice as likely to be drunk drivers. This is not a campaign against drinking. But it is a campaign for being thoughtful about your stance on alcohol and in control of your consumption. This is an essential episode for all men. Listen now… Photo by Adam Wilson on Unsplash for the National Drug Helpline

This week, Stephen urges men to consider doing something for their fathers (or father figures) that he did for his own dad years ago. Note: this episode is intentionally being released several weeks before Father’s Day because it might take some extra thought and effort for many of you. So, listen now! This one specific act of honoring your father can have a profound impact on your own life and even your legacy. Listen in to learn what you need to do.

In 2015, Stephen recorded a podcast about why men engage in affairs. It was widely discussed and helped a great many men avoid the trap of an extramarital affair. Now, for the first time ever, we're airing that episode on The GreatMan Podcast. Guys, even if you can't imagine yourself ever becoming involved in this kind of behavior, you need to listen to this episode. Together, we'll examine the male psychology behind extramarital affairs. Whether inspired by boredom, infatuation or immaturity, an affair is always preventable. This episode originally appeared on The Stephen Mansfield Podcast on August 26, 2015.

Travis Reinking is morally responsible for killing four and wounding four others at a Waffle House in the early hours of Sunday morning. However, he was enabled – almost directly – by a father who gives every evidence of being ill-informed, unengaged, and… to some extent… uncaring. Men, we are suffering from an absence of fathering. It’s a lost art, and it requires your investment. But we can correct course.

In order to be a great man – a righteous man – you have to be intentional. It will. Not. Happen. Naturally. Most men have been deposited into their adult years directly from whatever culture they were created in: sports, military, physical labor, etc. Many never move beyond these phases. They never gain a righteous vision of what it means to be a man. They don’t enlist the help of others to fulfill such a vision. In this episode, learn why being an intentional man is important, and how to get started.

We are teaching a false view of manhood if we tell our sons (and ourselves) that real men don’t cry. Real men do cry. They feel strong emotion and turn to their friends in times of need for both practical and emotional support. Stephen’s advice for every man: Feel your emotions, but don’t give vent without checking them. A mature man feels everything and checks his desires before acting on them.

Stephen crams in as many answers as he can to your questions! Here are just a few: What technique most helps you stay in shape while traveling? What did you abuse the most before you came to understand what it means to be a great man? What’s the greatest criticism you have of modern men? What’s the biggest change you ever made when it came to being a man?

The statistical outcomes regarding unmarried men and women living together are troubling. Why? For one, this type of arrangement is a “half step.” When you start making half steps in one area of your life, it’s hard to be wholehearted and to make confident decisions in other areas of your life. When you get another person involved in these half steps, things can get especially complicated. What state of soul would cause you to take a half step with a woman?

How would you explain manhood to a world that only knows the idiot version? The abusive version? The terrorist version? Unfortunately, this is the only type of man that many people recognize. Of course, if you listen to this podcast, you know that real masculinity is defined by strength and power in the service of others. A true man develops his strength so that he can use it to better serve his wife… his children… his community. Our world needs real men who will live and mentor these values. Is your life showing the world a better alternative?

Men are made for adventure. Yet so many guys are “over-domesticated.” You know how it goes: gradually, the pressures and duties of daily life begin to take over. We spend our time taking care of our homes, families, cars, and careers, while we neglect attending to our inner zeal and passion. Men, you need to have regular activities in your life that force excitement and adventure upon you. Every man at every age needs to look at his life, identify the boredom, and build in the excitement, passion, and adventure that he was made for. If you don’t do this you are putting yourself and those around you at tremendous risk.

Nikolas Cruz’s concerning behavior was noticed by foster parents, neighbors, and officials. Many of the alarms concerning the Parkland shooter came from women, in particular. Where were the men in his community? Think of the radically different outcome that could have come about had a good and noble man stepped into Nikolas Cruz’s life. How could a band of brothers have produced different results?

Whether you’re a Christian or not, Billy Graham displays traits of manhood worthy of admiration and modeling. In his 99 years, Graham displayed seven traits in particular: 1. He stayed close to the wild. He loved hunting, animals, and nature. 2. He kept it clean sexually – keeping travel plans secret, not meeting alone with women, and staying accountable with his team. 3. He admitted his mistakes. 4. He remained contemporary in style. 5. He remained informed. 6. He encouraged unity across lines. 7. He set boundaries to stay financially clean.

About 30 young men were on a discussion board looking for information that they just couldn’t find anywhere else... no fathers or brothers to talk to. Sadly, they were all completely wrong about the topic. Men, if we want to restore noble manhood, we have to foster a culture where conversations can happen. Older men, develop a culture around you in which you’re willing to share the lore of manhood. Younger men, find older, noble men who can teach you things. Nothing should be laughable or off limits. The lore of manhood doesn’t stem from locker room conversations and men’s health magazines. It’s born from a culture of noble manhood.

“A people without a heritage are easily persuaded,” said Karl Marx. Men usually face one of two problems today: they either have no sense of heritage, or they only know of a negative heritage. Part of the art of being a man is discovering the good and noble heritage that runs through you.

Marxism assumes that there is a pie only so big and that we are all in competition for a piece of the pie. In other words, if you become a multimillionaire, then you are taking something from others. Stephen believes that the pie is ever-expanding. If you find success in business, then you are enlarging the pie and creating more opportunity for others. This is important to remember at a time when women are rising and men are in decline (in nearly every measurable category). Women do not “take” anything from men through their accomplishments. A noble man cheers and encourages the achievements of women.

This week on the GreatMan Podcast, we're reposting our most popular episode of all time. If you missed it last year, be sure to dig in as Stephen shares actionable strategies for tackling tough issues. Know a man who could benefit from this week's show? Share the link with him! Porn and masturbation program a man’s soul. They train the body and emotions in a negative direction. You don’t have to share a moral or religious conviction to recognize porn and masturbation’s destructive forces. But there is good news. Science shows us that new habits can be developed in as little as 21 days. In this episode, Stephen shares some strategies to help men overcome these hidden addictions. Parents, this episode of the GreatMan Podcast may not be appropriate for children. Discretion advised.

Men are rapidly shaped by the things they see. Stories of noble friendships, comrades in battles, great sacrifices, brilliant artists… watching and reading these stories inspire and ennoble us. At the same time, being glued to the news cycle or watching trash entertainment also affects us. In this episode, Stephen urges men to become intentional about what they put before their eyes. Pull back, and look at your own content diet. How does the output of your life correlate with the input? Remember, you become what you behold.

When we deny ourselves, it forces to the surface the things that are lurking in our souls. Fasting and self-denial shove to the forefront those things that produce defeat in our lives. Try it, and observe for yourself. What does fasting produce in you? Feelings of anger? Self-pity? Insatiable appetite for food, sex, drink? In this episode, Stephen suggests how fasting can be an effective way of confronting the demons of your soul.

We live in the #MeToo era, an age that’s largely characterized by the sweeping uncovering of sexual abuse – far more cases than most men were aware of. In the midst of this cultural revolution, in which women are speaking out and harmful industries are getting cleaned up, some men are taking offense. Stephen’s noticed a backlash from some men who seem to react as if the #MeToo movement is an assault against them – despite the fact that they’ve never once perpetrated sexual abuse. In this episode, Stephen speaks to these (and all) men. Guys, here’s how we need to handle ourselves in the situation…

“The tragedy of life is what dies inside of a man while he lives,” said Albert Schweitzer. There is a spirt in a man that’s meant to be strong and bold. It’s intended to guide, empower, and ennoble. How you live either strengthens or weakens the manly spirit within you. In this episode, Stephen challenges men with the question, “Are you dying? Or are you gaining strength?”

Porn tells men that they’re desired by every woman (and that the women, themselves, often aren’t even aware of their own desires). Well, that’s a lie. Sadly, believing this lie has caused an incredible number of men to behave in completely lewd, disgraceful, and immoral ways, as the recent news cycle has brought to light. Men, let these accusations be a sobering reminder: what you pour into your mind and soul matters. The people you surround yourself with matter. The conversations you engage in matter. We become what we behold. Parents, this episode of the GreatMan Podcast may not be appropriate for children. Discretion advised.

Porn and masturbation program a man’s soul. They train the body and emotions in a negative direction. You don’t have to share a moral or religious conviction to recognize porn and masturbation’s destructive forces. But there is good news. Science shows us that new habits can be developed in as little as 21 days. In this episode, Stephen shares some strategies to help men overcome these hidden addictions. Parents, this episode of the GreatMan Podcast may not be appropriate for children. Discretion advised.

Whether you’re looking to fill your own Christmas list or shop for the men in your life, do not miss this list of Stephen’s top 11 books for men. Amazon links below… Mansfield’s Book of Manly Men by Stephen Mansfield Building Your Band of Brothers by Stephen Mansfield (Kindle, Paperback) Wild at Heart by John Eldredge Healing the Masculine Soul: God's Restoration of Men to Real Manhood by Gordon Dalbey Sons of the Father: Healing the Father-Wound in Men Today by Gordon Dalbey Tribe: On Homecoming and Belonging by Sebastian Junger The Wonder of Boys by Michael Gurian Future Men by Douglas Wilson Honor: A History by James Bowman The Book of Man: Readings on the Path to Manhood by Dr. William J. Bennett The Demise of Guys: Why Boys Are Struggling and What We Can Do About It by Philip Zimbardo and Nikita D. Coulombe

One of the greatest powers a man has is the power of his words, particularly when those words are backed by character and judgement. The words that you speak and the way you embed words in the souls of others matters. Many of you will have opportunities to put this into practice as you spend time with family during Christmas and New Year’s. Stephen shares advice on how to speak into the lives of those you love, as well as a story from his own life. Guys, there’s nothing grandiose or especially skilled about this practice. It’s simple, and you can do it. Learn how in this podcast.