Monotropism is a powerful description of a narrowed field of attention and interests that, for many, explains much of the autistic experience. Fergus Murray (they/them) shares about this topic both from personal experience, and as the child of Dinah Murray, one of the people who developed the term and theory.Healing from neurodivergent burnout requires understanding your monotropic brain and avoiding monotropic split as much as possible. And fun fact, as Fergus points out: in the original validation study, AuDHD people were the most monotropic!The title reflects both monotropism as an excellent theory about potentially multiple neurodivergences, as well as the tendency of monotropic people to end up seeing connections between diverse fields.Mentioned in episode:Fergus's website: oolong.co.ukMonotropism QuestionnaireAutism and Mental Health free course (free for first 90 days)Connect with Fergus & learn more about monotropism:Fergus's LinkTree: https://linktr.ee/0olongMonotropism: https://monotropism.orgADHD and MonotropismResources:Like Your Brain community spaceResources Blog Transcript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

There are three interrelated concerns that I hear over and over from AuDHD folks:They don't see a clear pathway from what they love or are good at to making enough money.Strong ethics and values make it difficult to imagine a sustainable life, i.e. making enough money to let things be easier.Undervaluing the things that are easy for them (while feeling a lot of guilt or shame about struggling with the things that are hard for them: didn't talk about this half much) They are not necessarily AuDHD-specific concerns, but we have some unique needs around resolving them.This episode shares personal examples (including talking about my 2023 earnings) to build out a holistic picture of what it looks like to be in the process with all of these concerns.Here are some conversation prompts if you want to talk to someone about #3:Let the person know that you're trying to sort out what skills and talents you have that you might be overlooking or undervaluing. I recommend both recording the conversation and asking the other person to take notes so you can get their perspective. Talk through (or write out if this is via email, though I recommend a live conversation if possible) your history with work and/or creative practice, and ways you've helped people. This can include free things such as volunteering. Make sure you also talk about what you've loved and what has felt easy and fun! Start turning this into a list of skills.Ask the other person for feedback on what stands out, and how they might describe or add to your list of skills. Have them ask you questions to draw out more information!Go back and forth adding to that list of skills, getting as specific as both of you can. Then get that person's opinion on what stands out as anything you might be undervaluing.Mentioned book The Art of Impossible by Steven KotlerFrom Burnout to Flourishing training for organizations, email [email protected] for more infoEpisode 10: Money & Surviving CapitalismNew Year: Map Your Intention sessionResources:Like Your Brain community spaceResources Blog & Contact FormTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you're not paying your business coach from ample profit in your business, it's likely not worth it. Especially when the book Profit First + a free accountability buddy can get you there instead. My biggest regret in my business was not implementing the profit first system when I first read the book in 2021, the first year I made good money in two businesses. I subsequently wasted a bunch of that money on expensive courses and coaching that weren't a good fit, because I was trying to find "the answer." If you'd like support either implementing in your business or creative practice over the next few weeks, I'm going to be scheduling coworking hours (and probably a chat space) over the next few weeks. This is free, by the way...not sure if I said that in the episode! If you'd like that, please send me your email & what you'd like to work on here. If at least five people sign up I'll get that going officially and email y'all. And if you'd like to share your experiences buying courses and/or coaching, I made an anonymous survey here. The first section is general and should take less than 5 minutes to fill out. The second section could take longer if you really want to dig into details and share more. But anything is interesting and useful, and I'll share those results on a future episode (again, anonymously). Mentioned in episode: Contact form for coworking starting mid-Jan Survey about having bought courses/coaching Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

grace allerdice shares about her passions for whales. Their place in myth, their role as bridge creatures, and how they are composers who sing a grid around the world every year.We dive into whale song, how terrifying and mesmerizing whales can be, and how deeply we both connect with the ocean and these huge mammals. First of hopefully many special interest episodes, when a guest talks about their passion and we go with the flow! If you'd like to share about a special interest or recommend a topic, please reach out.Mentioned in podcast: grace's main website and home—body podcast websiteRick Rubin's book The Creative ACTgrace's podcast episode that talks about whales (episode is mostly about astrology) grace also recommends Something Large & Wild, episode on This is Love about an encounter with a baby whaleResources:Like Your Brain community spaceAuDHDFlourishing.comTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Andrew Simonet is a Philadelphia-based dancer/choreographer and now novelist who has been massively influential in my own life. His Artist's U and book/workbook Making Your Life As An Artist helped me build the foundations of the business side of my music career.We talk aboutthe design problems in our liveshow many things are blamed on character flaws that are actually design issuesthe liberatory nature of not only the artist's life, but a well-designed lifehow designing your life to meet your own needs liberates youAfter we spoke, Andrew wanted to add: "However you have worked out your ability to create, to make things, to get things done, to get through your day, know that there are a lot of other artists and creatives out there who might benefit from hearing your solutions. Not only are your tools and rhythms and strategies valid, they’re hugely valuable. All of us are figuring out how to nourish our spirits and bodies and minds in this strange techno-capitalist world, and we could learn a lot from hearing how you do it."And in the extended full interview (we talked for another 20 minutes) here, Andrew asked about how my partner and I navigate our relationship since they do so much for me. He also asked about spaces for AuDHD teens, and personally I don't know of any that are BOTH youth-led/accepting AND have very accurate info. (TikTok for example has the former but a good amount of misinformation.) If you have recommendations for AuDHD teen spaces, let me know at [email protected]!Andrew's links: Artist's U: Making Your Life As An ArtistAndrew's amazing email list (one of my faves)Andrew's novels: Wilder, and A Night Twice as Long (the one we talked about in the episode)AndrewSimonet.comResources:Like Your Brain community spaceAuDHDFlourishing.comTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

No, more "good rich people" are not going to save the world. Not the least because the amount of money required to create systemic change (i.e. being a billionaire) seems to make one uninterested in systemic change... I wonder why? p.s. the real answer is community organizing: power and strength in numbers! The main problem with this idea is that if you try to massively redistribute wealth, at least in the USA the government will come down hard on you. For example, I once read that the Black Panthers were much more heavily targeted by the US government after they started providing large numbers of free meals to Black children. (p.s. the link there is to a generally good source, but I can't remember the book I read the actual idea in, unfortunately)This is also NOT an admonition not to become financially stable! I want more financial stability for all of us... but that doesn't require buying into shitty ideas.If you like the Mini episode format or have a topic idea, please say so here!Mentioned in Episode: Episode 10: Money & Surviving CapitalismEpisode 20: Poverty is Not Your Fault!Sam Pollack's Substack post "Conventional Marketing Ain't Workin' Anymore," and my take on itMy Book recommendation for Get Good With Money by Tiffany Aliche, and the direct link to the bookHow Trauma & CPTSD Cause UnderearningResources:Like Your Brain community spaceAuDHDFlourishing.comTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening. Knowing you get me is very meaningful, and I'm sure it is for the other neurodivergent folks in your life. Thanks for being you!Keep it up, you're doing great, and see you in the new year :) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

AuDHD folks have a complicated relationship with the idea of doing our best, because of our spiky profiles and cyclical energy. Also, we often seem to be trying harder than the people around us...whether or not that results in getting anywhere.There are many reasons that the brain might "hit a wall" and be unable to continue.Defining our best as "a bit better than average" is one approach (though I haven't convinced my own brain of that one yet).Some potential questions for reflection:What does doing your best mean to you? How do you know when you’re doing your best? How would it feel to know that you’re doing your best most or all of the time? Did this awaken a critical voice in your mind? Does that feel like your voice or someone else’s? Is this voice actually helping you, and either way, is this the main voice you want to live by? When have you felt compassion for someone else who is obviously trying their best? This could be a child, or someone in the process of learning something. Why do you feel driven to do your best, if that’s something you often feel? New Year: Map Your Intention sessionBonus: for folks who check out by Dec 31st, I'll also be providing a bonus follow-up email with suggested resources that I'll research for you after our call.If you have questions about whether your specific project or situation fits, you can email [email protected]:Like Your Brain community spaceAuDHDFlourishing.comTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Becoming the next version of ourself isn't about forcing. It's about that natural process of embodiment when suddenly, this is who we are now. Usually by the time we've fully embodied something, it kind of feels like we've always been this way.It's a difficult process to describe from inside it... but understanding the process you're in can be a relief!(And first 3.5 minutes are talking about the ADHD meds shortage and letting my brain do things that are easier for it)New Year: Map Your Intention sessionBonus: for folks who check out by Dec 31st, I'll also be providing a bonus follow-up email with suggested resources that I'll research for you after our call.Resources:Like Your Brain community spaceAuDHDFlourishing.comTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Alternate title: AuDHD Unmasking & ActivismArtist, skateboarder, special ed teacher, and AuDHD activist my world iz blue talks about his recent Autism and ADHD diagnoses... and the burnout that led to them.He originally learned how to live unmasked by being labeled as an artist, i.e. someone who will be themselves regardless. However, that way of life directly clashes with what's required in the professional world.We talk about how neurodivergent kids (and adults) are treated in school, what elements of a better world would look like, movement and mental health, and how collective action is our main option if we want to make the world better for all of us.Connect & find his art on Instagram @myworldizblueNew Year: Map Your Intention sessionBonus: for folks who check out by Dec 31st, I'll also be providing a bonus follow-up email with suggested resources that I'll research for you after our call.Resources:Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocAuDHDFlourishing.comEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Bonus workshop from Like Your Brain (with client speaking cut out for privacy) on setting a personal intention or three for the new year that feels motivating and interesting to you. Of course you can use this method for any area of your life such as career. Traditional goal-setting starts with where you want to "arrive." We start with how you want to FEEL, and what helps you feel that way. The reason I'm focusing on feelings and personal aims is that we often put our best energy into professional life, relationships, other people, and generally things we think we're supposed to do. If there's something that makes you feel REALLY REALLY GOOD, I want that to be elevated to the status of Annual Goal ;) (if you want that... we'll talk about ways to approach this without the goal word also)The questions if you want to write about them:What makes you happy, feel good, etc (or however else you want to feel)? Or what kinds of experiences do you enjoy (what brings you pleasure or is interesting to you)? When you think about times you feel good, or like the way you're feeling, how might you describe that? What activities, situations, people etc support you in experiencing or feeling that way? Are there any patterns you notice when you think about the times that you've felt this way?What are some potential goals that might move you toward that?Is there one that stands out that you'd like to work with? What might this look like for next year? What's feeling like something you could feasibly start moving toward soonish?What do you need to support this? What do you already have at your disposal that might support it? What would you need to add to your life in terms of people, resources, learning, time, actual physical objects, etc to support this potential intention or desire?New Year: Map Your Intention session Bonus: for folks who check out by Dec 25th, I'll also be providing a bonus follow-up email with suggested resources that I'll research for you after our call.Full call including everyone's comments over on the Like Your Brain community Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you're struggling, whether that's just a bad day, a longer stretch, or that very relatable feeling that all of life has been irredeemably difficult and that no one understands or can help... I just wanted to take a moment to validate and make space for those feelings.You're not alone... and at the same time we can end up feeling very alone. If you need to numb out from these feelings, it can help to acknowledge that it feels unbearable and that you're choosing temporary escape. We all do it and it can be a healthy coping mechanism!Binaural music is the tool I suggested searching free versions of online. What are some free and easy ways that you can feel a bit better, to get out of your head a little bit, to help the body get what it needs? What are some accessible resources already at your disposal that have made you feel better in the past? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neurodivergent folks may not experience habits in the way they're traditionally talked about. Specifically, they may never become truly "background," and instead we remain in the active decision-making mode.To that end, I've personally found it much more helpful to create rituals rather than habits. It explicitly acknowledges that this is an active process as opposed to a background habit, which is more honest about how our brains work. It also triggers my PDA (demand avoidance) far less!This episode suggests some starting points, including:Choosing a task or time of day to build ritual aroundFinding your "why" and brainstorming possibilitiesPare down to an initial ritual of a few stepsGather materialsOther podcasts/episodes mentioned: AuDHD: The Science of Autism & ADHD on Sci Guys Divergent Conversations podcastResources:Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterAuDHDFlourishing.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Matt made a career as a lawyer that worked for his brain... then found out he's AuDHD. He shares some of the challenges and strengths that have shaped his career. This is helpful for any AuDHDer with professional struggles, and especially if you're in or are considering a client-facing career. Note that we're not using his last name in the show notes or description for SEO reasons at his request, but he's happy to connect with young or aspiring AuDHD lawyers who are looking for mentorship or advice! You can also connect with Matt on Twitter at matt_camLike Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A simple practice blending honesty with your current feelings plus any gratitude that may arise. Including how to use this to smooth over social or family concerns... good luck with any holidays you celebrate!p.s. there's a new website up at audhdflourishing.com! It's still under construction so please pardon any broken links... should be spruced up within the next week :) Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks to Chris Hale for this cross-posted episode from his podcast, You Need a Coach B*tch! We talk about: Building businesses that work for our AuDHD brainsWhat we don't see when looking at the external success of othersWhy so many people who achieve creative success young have wealthy backgrounds Questioning WHY you want your big goals so you can aim towards the ones that will really fulfill your desiresWhy it can be extra tough to start a small business and/or creative business right now How our brains get stuck and...The state changes in the body that can help us get unstuckYou can find Chris Hale On Instagram @theonlychrishaleAll the links on LinkTreeWebsite theonlychrishale.comOther resources:Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The story of a meltdown. For me these days, that includes some intrusive thoughts around being a burden.You are not a burden. And even if we are sometimes, that's okay. I want to be a part of communities that can carry each other sometimes. Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Diagnoses and labels can be really helpful to explain our experiences. We finally have a "because" to explain why we do the things we do! And also... that same "because" sometimes starts to feel like it's holding us back. It's possible to acknowledge limitations while also leaving space for growth and inevitable change. Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Linda Thai is a therapist, educator, and storyteller. She has been one of the most important people in my own healing journey, especially her focus on somatic embodied integration. Feeling safe enough to work with what the body holds was a turning point for both of us. Linda shares about her own healing journey and how key the body was for her own process.She drops countless pieces of wisdom in her gentle yet direct style.You'll also hear me laugh a lot more than usual, in part because of how comfortable I feel in her presence!Resources mentioned:The January 2024 round of the Somatic Embodiment & Regulation Strategies: Not only one of the best courses I've ever taken, but by FAR the best value for the cost (plus, scholarships available). I took this course twice and recommend it most highly!! Linda's website: https://www.linda-thai.com/If you scroll down on Linda's website you can sign up for her newsletter, which she usually sends monthly and is always informative. That's where you can find out about her new content for next year, including something called Trauma & The Voice that I'm very excited about!Originally published on The Longer Road as a two-part seriesTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Poverty is not your fault. Debt is not your fault. And you don't have to find solutions alone!This episode talks about the systemic side, the AuDHD-specific elements such as impulsive shopping, and how screwed up debt is historically and currently. Note: This episode is quite USA-centric. While there are mentions of ways this might affect people in other countries, growing up here is my main context on this topic.Resources mentioned: Simone Seol's episode Debunking the idea of a "Scarcity Mindset"Article The Cognitive Burden of Poverty the above episode was based onDavid Graeber's book Debt: The First 5000 YearsLike Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

An AuDHD therapist! Danielle Aubin (she/they), LCSW, works with neurodivergent clients and has expertise in trauma. We talk about why trauma is such a big deal for ND clients. And the title of the episode comes from their amazing take on why having safe therapy is especially important for ND people, and what that looks like. If you're in therapy or considering it, this episode is for you! (Also if you've experienced trauma from therapy, because this conversation totally validates that also.)Episode originally posted on The Longer Road podcast, June 2023 Danielle's websiteDanielle's TikTok @myautistictherapistDanielle's Instagram @myautistictherapistResources Danielle recommends for finding a therapist: ndtherapists.comautistictherapist.com inclusivetherapists.com-------------------Transcript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Optimizing (and the related bio-hacking) are really popular... but why? Who are we doing this for, and who really benefits? This episode spans the last several years of my life starting with my first coaching certification that was literally called Optimize at the time. There were some positive benefits such as better sleep, which on the whole improved my mood. But in the long run, there's a potential negative side to the advice to optimize. And at the same time, many AuDHD people will enjoy optimizing at some point, because it's fun! This episode talks about that balance. The questions near the end of the episode if you'd like to reflect on them: Are you multitasking in ways that don't actually feel good, just for the sake of "efficiency?"Are you expending a lot of mental or other kinds of energy to make something perfect, when it could be really damn good at 95% or pretty good at 80% or passable at 65%?Does your current system seem functional? Is it possible to do less and still have it function okay?What are you currently doing more to avoid failure than to move toward what you actually want?Transcript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks to Amelia Hruby at the Off the Grid podcast for this lovely interview! Here are her show notes: Today I’m joined by coach & composer Mattia Maurée to talk about running a business & navigating social media in a way that supports your unique brain & lived experience.Tune in to our conversation to hear about—Common ADHD, Autistic & AuDHD struggles with workHow to quit overworking as a coping strategyEmbracing a cyclical relationship to social mediaThe importance of play for our brainsHow podcasting serves Mattia’s businessMattia’s method for connecting with the online communities you’re craving“The more I've learned about the brain, the more I've been able to actually accept that I am never, ever going to be able to behave in a neuronormative way or run my business in a neuronormative way. So I have to have space for things to be different." — Mattia MauréeLearn more about Like Your Brain here, and sign up here!Transcript Doc Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Task bracelets can be a task per tag or written really small like I did below... then they stay on your wrist to walk you through the task. Thanks to Caitlin Fisher for the idea!The first half of the episode covers how to make them and how I'm using them.Then it's about the launch of Like Your Brain, an ongoing community space for integration and gentle support. Do less, feel better!The welcome calls are Fri Sep 29 2023 2p EST, and Mon Oct 2 5p EST... hop in if you want to help shape what the space becomes!Task bracelet pic below, linked on Facebook here, also in the Transcript:[image description: Mattia’s hand holding a blue coil bracelet with a green tag attached. Written on the paper inside the tag is the following instructions for doing laundry: 1. Fill basket 2. Take downstairs 3. Pockets/fill 4. Add soap 5. Settings/turn on 6. Timer 7. Pull out line dry 8. To dryer 9. Dryer on 10. Hang line dry]Transcript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a mind-expanding episode! Cassandra Idris recently founded an organization built around neurodivergent brains at every level, and mutual aid for some of the most marginalized populations in Philadelphia.She speaks eloquently about mental health, being a trans woman and the inherent social betrayals in that experience, and how the system isn't going to pay us to bring it down. Because she's seen the systems from many perspectives (including from the inside as an HR professional), she has a detailed understanding of what it takes to create true change.One of those changes is to create more organizations by us and for us!If you'd like to learn more about the Philadelphia Mutual Aid collective, or donate, you can do that here. And if you're generally curious about how Open Collective works, that's here.You can connect with Cassandra on Instagram hereCassandra's SoundCloud (techno mixes)Transcript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Feelings, emotions, sensations in the body... We've all received confusing messages around what they mean and what they are. And many autistic folks have trouble connecting to their emotions and related body sensations.They're also important and potentially useful messages from our body as it attempts to stay safe. This episode covers one compelling theory of what feelings (sensations and emotions) are, as well as a variety of tools to get through the day no matter where you are in your journey. Also, just a reminder that whatever you're doing to get through the day right now is okay. You don't owe anyone—including yourself—a specific amount of healing or performing wellness. Book mentioned is How Emotions are Made by Lisa Feldman Barrett. I also mention Linda Thai and Resmaa Menakem. Episode originally published as 009 Feelings: Why?? on The Longer Road podcastLinks:Transcript Doc Email Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Michael is an AuDHD content creator (with a huge audience) and coach who runs a free AuDHD peer support group. He shares his formula for feeling better, which includes removing negative stimuli to reach neutral, rather than trying to leap straight to happiness. And shares beautifully about how he finds peace in the neutral, since even happiness is a fleeting feeling.You can connect with Michael at the links below:Peer Support GroupAll of Michael's linksInstagram @ADHDruidsTranscript Doc Email Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Meltdowns and shutdowns appear to be a natural release valve for an overwhelmed autistic brain. They feel out of control and can be quite distressing.While there are ways to push them off, I experience a "point of no return" after which I need some big release or I'm going to feel terrible for days.Learning your triggers, as well as planning ahead for a safer experience if you do have a meltdown or shutdown can lessen our overall stress and shame.(One thing I forgot to record in the episode is that for me, shutdowns are almost always low-verbal or I can't speak at all.)Links:1. Meltdowns & Shutdowns* https://embrace-autism.com/meltdowns-and-shutdowns/2. How it feels to have an autistic meltdown and how you can help* https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/articles/38f5MsC2mB5fnmCr5v77zDn/how-it-feels-to-have-an-autistic-meltdown-and-how-you-can-help3. All About ‘Autism Meltdowns’: Why They Happen and How to Cope https://psychcentral.com/autism/autism-meltdowns4. Autism Shutdown Vs Meltdown: What's the Difference? https://www.andnextcomesl.com/2022/06/autism-shutdown-vs-meltdown.htmlEmail list: https://mattia.ck.page/a6b7c9bf09Episode Transcript*autistic writer Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jes Diverges (she/they) helps fellow autistic ADHDers and has a fascinating background. We dive into how they ended up coaching rather than finishing their therapy degree... and in the process touch on how messed up some of our culture's attitudes are toward mental health!While we certainly don't solve the issue of AuDHD mental health, we talk aboutwhen to take a break from trauma healinghow entrepreneurship has been a surprising part of our trauma healingwhy insistence on one modality such as CBT doesn't serve ushow to balance individual and community healingFrom Jes' website:As an auDHD coach, I empower fellow autistic ADHDers to understand the unique interplay of the auDHD “combo meal” within their minds, and to let go of perfectionism, people pleasing, and unrealistic neurotypical expectations.By embracing radical self-love in place of shame, I guide individuals on their journey to confidently navigate the chaotic intricacies of auDHD life and become the audaciously authentic auDHDers they were meant to be.Resources mentioned:Jes' Instagram & TikTok @jesdivergesjesdiverges.comEmail Jes at [email protected]' Linktree with all the thingsEpisode TranscriptAuDHD Flourishing Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Most people have one or two core self-care needs that, if they're met, everything else feels easier. This episode is about how to figure out yours... and what to look out for when you hear people preaching about their own!There's also acknowledgment that your neurodivergent body and brain may process things in different ways, so the following questions may not be that useful for you.Figuring out your core self-care need or needs (just a jumping-off point!): Thinking back to times in your life when things felt the easiest, what was your life like? Which of your needs were being met fairly well?When life has been a bit easier or better, did you notice any particular ups and downs based on particular needs being met? For example, if you were overall feeling pretty good compared to your baseline, was there anything that particularly threw you off? Or something that could bring you back to that feeling better pretty quickly?Tuning into your body right now, is there anything your body is asking for? This won't necessarily be a core need, it's more a check-in to see what messages your body is already good at giving you.Thinking about the past few days, weeks, or months, are there any messages your body has been consistently giving you? For example, when you've felt tired, does it feel more like you need sleep, or more like you need food, or more like you need to be around another person to recharge? Again, this isn't a perfect metric, just noticing how your body talks to you.Is there any form of self-care that feels like it REALLY fixes a bad day?Resources mentioned: Takedown of Why We Sleep: https://guzey.com/books/why-we-sleep/Commentary on the above post: https://statmodeling.stat.columbia.edu/2019/11/18/is-matthew-walkers-why-we-sleep-riddled-with-scientific-and-factual-errors/Transcript DocAnd one more link someone sent taking down the book Why We Sleep (I haven’t listened to this episode but the links alone look great): https://open.spotify.com/episode/4r0Vawq8xAfnsnKbYVUNhc?si=n7t-koeuS2GXQ2QnA8j4dQ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

How do we survive capitalism while navigating the ethical dilemmas of making money within this broken system?There's no one right answer, but this episode breaks down my thoughts about it over the past few months.The problem isn't simply the exchange of goods or services for money, it's how late-stage capitalism seeks short-term profits above all else, extracting all the excess labor of the "lower classes" for profit.Ultimately I want more of us to be able to survive capitalism so we can build something better.Resources mentioned:The Moneyless Society podcast & bookThe AuDHD Entrepreneurs & Creatives free facebook group (I no longer am in the group bc I deleted Facebook, and a friend is running it) Podcast transcript doc Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's easy for AuDHD brains to latch onto one concept of a solution, and believe it has to happen that way. But sometimes there's a deeper question or problem underneath that.As one example, many neurodivergent folks want a morning routine... but the real question under that could be "How do I feel good in the morning," or "How do I get my day started?" How do we ask the right questions to make sure we're not wasting our energy? One way to know that part of you believes you're asking the wrong question is if you're experiencing "self-sabotage" when trying to achieve the solution you have in mind. A few potential ways to reframe your question/problem: Take time with it & take a step backExternally process with someone elseCome up with at least 3 different ways this could go down, or different scenarios, that might solve the question/problem (to get your brain thinking creatively, and get another perspective) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a meta-episode about how I think about and approach the science around autism and ADHD (as well as other neurodivergences).While I do my best to do additional research, there are so many things that no one knows about AuDHD brains!One tool to improve this podcast is the Transcript doc linked below, which is publicly available for comments. If you have any questions or comments, you can leave them on the file and I'll try to answer them there and/or in the podcast!Full Transcript hereAuDHD Flourishing Newsletter signup& this week's* newsletter if you wanna check one out * No, I don't send newsletters weekly... yay doing what works for our own brain instead of arbitrary rules/schedules :) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm a naturally growth-oriented person... however, I often find myself changing or "fixing" things that others think are a problem. What happens when I reorient to what's actually important to me?The self-help industry will happily sell us solutions, whether or not the problem was actually bothering us before we heard about it.Many of us feel like we're struggling alone. But not only are most people silently struggling, many neurodivergent folks feel that they're uniquely broken. It's such a common experience!It's totally fine to choose to change something about your life. However, it can be helpful to check in with yourself to make sure it's really what you want.The questions I offered around choosing to change something (and especially purchasing a self-help product):Is this actually causing me any harm?Is it harming anyone at all? If yes, is that harm actually meaningful, or am I mostly being harmed by the shame around it?If I changed this about myself, what might "better" look like? Is that definition or desire coming from me, or suggestions outside of myself?Is paying attention to this popular "problem" keeping my attention away from anything deeply important to me? If I didn't put time, attention, or money into this, what might I want to do instead?If I never changed again, would I (still) love and accept myself?Here are the messages I need to hear:It's okay to take breaks from personal growth.It's okay to give up on changing things about yourself just because they might make other people more comfortable.It's okay to focus on what your body and mind actually want and need, whether or not those line up with messaging from people around you.I bet you're actually doing a great job with the circumstances you've been given.Even if you never change or fix another thing, I love and accept you.Full Transcript hereAuDHD Flourishing Newsletter signup Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pasha Marlowe speaks brilliantly about how to navigate trauma, triggers, and sensory needs in relationships as an AuDHD person.Making it concrete, we both talk about a recent meltdown with our respective partners, and how we navigated those during and after.This is a deeply un-shaming episode—we still struggle with relational trauma despite all the "work" we've done. It's okay to have a lot of needs in relationships. And we talk about how hard it can be to figure out what those are and communicate them effectively.If your neurodivergent relationship needs extra support, Pasha is one of the rare practitioners who's ND, trained in family therapy, and works with couples!Resources mentioned:Pasha's websiteNeuroqueering podcast and Mattia's guest episode@neuroqueercoach on TikTok@neuroqueercoach on InstagramNeuroqueer Heresies bookFull Transcript hereAuDHD Flourishing Newsletter signup Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nat Smith is a vulnerability coach, playwright, and connection witch. They're also my sibling, so you'll hear stories about our childhood.Nat has known they're ADHD for years, and only recently has been exploring the label autistic. One reason it's been a slow realization: they don't experience it as a disorder and don't need a lot of external support day-to-day.Because of that experience, we also touch on the "levels" of autism currently being given in diagnosis. Many Level 1 folks are never diagnosed. And while I would probably be labeled Level 1, I'm actually more Level 2... I've just managed to have family and partners meet my daily needs.Nat's perspective is incredibly helpful for anyone who wonders what autism looks like when it's NOT an obviously disabling condition. This is where the word "Neurotype" is so useful!Disclaimer: And I would hope it goes without saying... every autistic person is different and has their own experience! Many if not most autistic people (and especially those who receive an official diagnosis) do experience autism as a disability for many reasons.Nat's experience does not at all detract from that! AND I feel it's important for more autistic people to be "out," even if they have a less common presentation.   Resources:Nat mentioned Devon Price's book Laziness Does Not Exist and the article of the same name.Nat's Substack newsletter/articlesNat's FacebookAuDHD Flourishing newsletter Full Transcript here  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The idea of "potential" has been weaponized against neurodivergent and disabled kids.Today I dig into why I hate the concept of potential as it's currently used, what I propose we talk about instead, and many personal details of my own journey toward feeling like I'm enough.Feeling a deep sense of enough-ness has totally changed my life. And while we all reach that in different ways, neurodivergent community has absolutely been a part of my healing journey. Love Your Brain July-Nov 2023 cohort (official last day to apply is Thurs June 29th... but also I understand the ADHD brain and we have a few days of leeway as the first group call is the week of July 7th)Cross-posted from The Longer Road podcastFull Transcript hereAuDHD Flourishing Newsletter signup Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Happy Autistic Pride Day, June 18th!What are you proud of?It doesn't negate any of our challenges, but it was fun to focus on what I love about my brain for a whole episode.If you'd like to learn more about Love Your Brain, here 'tis!Full Transcript hereAuDHD Flourishing Newsletter signup Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

AuDHD women are often misdiagnosed, but Kristen's list is ridiculous and includes the word "histrionic" (which I didn't know you could even get in this century)! Her goal was always to build an awesome life instead of just being a compliant patient.And thank goodness, because now she's out here teaching people how to give fewer fucks, raising a family, and making awesome content all over the internet.Links mentioned:Find Kristen at https://kristenking.com/"Fuck this shit I'm out" songSome links from Kristen around that 97% statisticLove Your Brain is enrolling for July (and is 20% full as of posting this episode)Full Transcript here Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.