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Hey, it's Bob Getty here from The Bachelor, and of course, the co-host of Almost Famous to OGs.
And I'm Jason Mesnick.I was a bachelor a long, long time ago, and I'm your real estate agent here in Seattle.That's right.
And this is I Do Part Two, a podcast all about finding love the second time around.Now, we are going to pop some questions.All right.Are you ready?Let's go.All right, Jason.Here we go.First question.
If you sleep with a woman on the first date, are you thinking about her now for a long-term relationship?
You know, I would.I think the world's so different now.I think if I didn't, it'd be a super double standard.
Oh, agreed.I totally agree with that.And sometimes love at first sight actually exists, right?All right, here we go.
Do men get turned off if a woman double texts, you know, like sends another message before you even had a chance to answer the first one?
Uh, it depends on how long of a break there is.Like if she texts like, you know, and the next text is an hour later, probably not.But if it's like every two or three minutes, it might get a little creepy.
Yeah, a little much, right?A little much.Just let me answer.Let me get it done here.Are on a date.
Should a woman offer to pay? Sure, why not?I mean, the world's different now.I'm not saying that you'd let her pay, but if she wants to offer, that's a nice gesture.
Yeah, I actually agree.My wife would always be reaching for her wallet and I'm like, oh, come on, you're not going to pay.And she's like, no, but I at least want you to think I'm trying.And I'm like, OK.And I loved that.
I thought it was really, really sweet.Paulie, will you listen to the Bob here?Sometimes it's hard to pay. Oh, here's a good question.And this is, this could be another double standard kind of question.Do guys care about a woman's body count?
Do you know what that means?Like a woman's number, magic number.Do guys care about that?
I don't think, like, I mean, unless you're Wilt Chamberlain and like, it's like 10,000 or something like that, you know, nobody knows who Wilt Chamberlain is, but like, otherwise, like if it's a reasonable, reasonable number, I don't think.Right.
Well, I think too, that could be an age appropriate thing too, right?
Like if someone's 22 and they've got, you know, a considerable amount racked up there and then someone who's, you know, 40 or 50 or whatever, you know, and maybe, I don't know, maybe it doesn't matter.Who knows?
It's not 10,000, I'm just gonna say 10,000 is the law.
Keep it below 10,000 and there shouldn't be any conversation about it, right?
I don't think it's acceptable.I mean, I may have done it, but like, here's what's happening now.So my son's at the dating age, he's in college, and a girl he was dating,
last year started ghosting him a little bit and seeing how he reacted to it, it pissed me off.Right.Meaning like, just don't, you can just say, Hey, things aren't going well, I'm moving on, whatever it might be.
I don't think like, come on, you don't need to ghost anybody.That's not cool.
Yeah.Just be a gentleman.Right.I mean, from the standpoint of a guy, I don't know what you'd say to a, to a woman on that one, but I agree to a lady.Yeah.I would, I would literally say if it was my son to grant, he's only five.
So he doesn't have a phone.
He's not, he's not ghosting yet.Thank God.But yeah, when he gets older, I think I would say like, come on, dude, just be a gentleman, you know, whatever.She might not be that into you.You never know.Oh, have I ever ghosted?Oh, I have not.
It's not my style.I would never ghost.I think what I would do is I would do what Jason, I would do what you're saying, Jason.
I would be like, hey, this just isn't working out, you know, but I will say back in the day when I, when I dated a lot, I would often make it so that they, they wanted to break up with me. What would you do?I don't know.
I would just be like, I don't wear deodorant.You're like, Oh my God, what's wrong with this guy?No, but it's true.
Like I would always try to like, not be as if I were, if I was just kind of over a relationship, I wouldn't be as responsive, but I would still be responsive, but I wouldn't be like, Hey, what's going on?I'd love to see you today.
I'd be more like, you know, Oh, hey, Debbie.Yeah.What's up?How you been?You know, sorry, can't get together today or whatever.You know, I wouldn't be as as as I guess available is the best way to put it.
Two questions specifically, Jason, I know you went through this one, so this is a good one.How soon would you introduce a woman that you're dating to your kids?Right.So we could go to your to your past life, right, to your first stage of your life.
Well, I mean, I would actually say in the first stage, I had done it too soon, right?There are times where I thought mentally I was ready, right?Even though I was not ready.So again, I think some of that comes with maturity.
Back then, in my early, this is my late 20s, I thought I was mature.And there were times where I did introduce somebody to my son way too soon, right?But again, if you're on a TV show, you're gonna do it right away because that's in the script.
Yeah, they're rolling that out hot.Now, what if your kids don't like a woman that you're dating?Are you basically like, okay, we're not doing this.
This is over.I don't, that's a really tough one.And I've talked to like friends, family members about this.I know that like, even me, my mom brought in my stepdad when we were teenagers.She moved in really, really quick.
We didn't, it wasn't like we didn't like him.We didn't even know him.Right.Right.Right.I think it's just being like, and I'm not saying yes or no.Right.But like if, if somebody is abusive, that's one thing. even if it's verbally abusive, right?
Not even physically abusive, but knowing that, like, give it a shot before you jump in deep.That's all I'd say.Because I have jumped in really quick and it never works out.
Right.Backfires on you.And I mean, you know, that's kind of to that end.I mean, you know, that's like what you and Molly did.I think that's so great.You stayed in your life.
I mean, I got the same Chris Harrison advice and I love telling people to this day, you know, I'll be hosting something now and they'll go, you know, I'm like, no, I never quit my day job.I still do the same thing I've always done.
It's just, this is kind of the fun side thing I get to do on the weekends or whatever.But yeah, and that was great Harrison advice.
I think your advice might kind of be right there with it and they should listen to what you're talking about because I think that's huge.What's one thing that all women need to know if they want to have success dating a divorced man?
uh be patient i think and well be patient and then ask yourself if this is really what you want because it could be a challenge right i look at about what my stepdad went through with us and i look what molly went through molly was like oh this is easy like i looked at jason's awesome and ty's super cute but i think the real part of this of like
How is he going to look at me?What's the relationship going to be like?I think you really this is and only you know that like if you don't love if you never wanted to have kids and you know that what's it like?
What is it going to be like if you're dating somebody with a little kid or a kid at all?Just ask is all of a sudden it's it's turnkey family, right?
You got to be on, you know, and you got and you got to also like be attentive to it like you got to care about them.Like I know Ty has got a stepdad for my ex wife and he's a great stepdad like we get along.
and making sure that's something you really want, but only you truly know that.
Right.Yeah, I agree.I agree with that.
I think one of the pieces of advice I would give when dating a divorce guy, because I was a divorce guy without kids from my previous relationship was, and this is a terrible thing to say, because I do think it's a little double standard-ish, but getting too comfortable too fast.
Right?So like, you know, it's almost got to be an accident that you leave something over at the house the first time, right?It can't be that you put your stuff in a drawer and be like, you know, it's almost got to be like, whoa.
Like, I mean, because everything to a divorced guy, whether they wanted to be the divorced person or not, you know, whether they wanted to not stay in that previous relationship or not, is they don't want to make the same mistakes over again.
So it's going to be cautious optimism at best.
Well, and I would even say, be conscious, and I did this, how much does it affects the kids, right?I mean, there was a girl I remember brought around, she was awesome, even though it didn't work out.
After it ended, he started asking, where did she go?Oh, yeah.And he was so little, Ty was so little, that he didn't have any idea who she was, why she was around.But just be conscious that your decisions really impact everybody around you.
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All right, now we're going to get into a little bit more of, you know, some a little more seedy stuff.So what is the biggest red flag that you think women ignore when they're dating? What's the biggest red flag?
Yeah, like what's something that they see from a guy and like if you're on the, cause I actually know what I'm going to say to this one.Okay.And I've seen it and I, and I know it.So you want me to go first?I'll go first and let you think of this.
Okay.All right.So when a dude just is radio silent for long periods of time, And then it is very shady about where they've been.Right.
Like to me, I was always pretty much an open book, like, you know, like I always tell Canyon, I would say, you know, I don't ever want anything I'm doing or saying when you're not around to, you know,
make you look like you're the joke, you're the butt of the joke, you know?So here's what I do, here's where I'm at, here's where I'm at.
Even if it was something that I knew she might not like, but it's just like, I'm doing this with my boys tonight, whatever.
It was like this brutal honesty to a certain degree that I felt like, man, when we were still together, you know, three years later, I was like,
Jeez, she really actually loves me, you know, because I wasn't exactly, I was like, I'm going with my guys to do this.And it was brazen at times, you know, but at least she knew where I was.
And I feel like sometimes people make excuses for people they're dating who all of a sudden they'll be like, you know, oh yeah, I went out with my buddies last night.
Oh, is that why I never heard from you since seven o'clock until today, two in the afternoon the next day?You know what I mean?It's like, come on, man, if you got a certain rapport going with someone,
Then, you know, anything out of that has to be a little bit of a red flag, right?
Again, like if they want you around, like, I think the biggest red flag, I guess, to me would be like, if they're only calling you late at night.Right.Booty call.
So like, again, like if they really care and they want you around, they want you around other times than those, those moments.Exactly.
Yeah.Yeah.They want you around those times too, but they actually want to do like other stuff.
Yeah, I actually think one of the coolest things, and I definitely saw this with my wife, was when I would do stuff with the guys and I would actually want her to be there.I didn't feel that need to have this guy time.
I was more like, why don't you join us?We're going to watch the game, whatever.And she'd have the choice whether she wanted to come or not.But it was like, I always wanted her to feel that inclusiveness.
And she's often told me that that was one of the things that she loved about our early relationship. That's awesome.Oh, this is a good one.Why do guys send unsolicited dick pics?And why so quickly?
I think that's a new thing because I can tell you honestly, I have never sent a dick pic.
I have never either.Like, I don't like, and again, like this might be, maybe it's because we still have phones that don't show pictures.You probably got a really good point.You can't take a picture of the landline.I've tried. I don't know.
And again, maybe this is like, I'm married to somebody from the Midwest, none of that stuff would ever fly.Right, right.
Same.I just wouldn't do it.Part of me was always like, and I guess maybe it's because I, you know, I mean, gosh, I was 32 when I went on The Bachelor.And even then, I remember I was, I mean, that was 2005 or four, wait, 2003.
Oh my God, when I was The Bachelor.And so, I mean, cell phones weren't that good at that time.Yeah, the iPhones weren't there yet.Uh-uh, we didn't have iPhones yet. And I mean, I may have even had a flip phone during my bachelor run.
I'm not, I can't remember exactly, but I do remember thinking to myself when people, I was already, you know, I got married after the bachelor, then divorced, then three years later met Canyon.And by that point I was kind of, you know, well known.
And so I wasn't sending dick pics at that point, that's for sure.So I kind of missed the window of opportunity had I, had that been something I wanted to do.
I guess, thankfully I didn't. I personally, I've never even asked my friends about this, but you see it in the media, right?Where like a figure has done something like that.I'm like, what the heck is going on in their brain to do that?Right.
Honestly, like, don't you know that they can send that picture to like 40 other people go, Hey, this is Bill's, you know, whatever.It's like, that's how I think of it.
Yeah. All right.And I got one more.This is going to be the last question that we have during our speed round, which probably hasn't been as speedy as the producers would have liked because we're talking so much.
But this is what happens when you get two guys who actually like each other on a call together who haven't seen each other in a while.Now, you're going to have to go back in the annals for this one, back in the dating annals.Got it.I'm back.
All right.Is sexting ever a good idea?And when and when not, would you do it?Sexting.
I, that's a good, that's a good question.Again, like I'm going back to like, I'm married to somebody from the Midwest and this stuff doesn't, this is not something, right?Yeah, yeah.Like if you are in a trusting, committed relationship, right?Right.
With somebody that you've, like you trust, right?It's beyond having kids, right?It's like, there, there may be a place for something that is unique, but I will say in my personal opinion, like things on your cell phone are always findable, right?
I remember that, and I can't remember, was it Jennifer Aniston or somebody, some celebrity, like all these pictures came out and she thought they were private.Just remember that.
I think about what I'm telling my son right now about what you should post or not post on Instagram or whatnot.The internet, your phone, it fricking lives forever.
Absolutely, dude.I think about it all the time.I tell my nephew that he's 25 now.I was like, dude, just, you know, watch what you write out there because, you know, I get it.In the heat of the moment, you feel this way.
But six months from now, it's probably not that big of a deal.But now that's going to follow you around.So just, you know, I think about a lot of time and I really do.
So I kind of keep my stuff to a very lighthearted, you know, level set medium at all times.There's cute winky face emojis for a reason. That is so true.Well, dude, I love it, man.I love catching up with you.
Thanks for doing the rapid fire question with me, the I do part two.I think I'm so glad when they called me and said that they were going to have you on it with me.And I was very excited about that.
And great to get to meet Gary on the first part of the show and for us to get to catch up with all of this.I mean, anything you learned from my answers today?Because I learned a lot from yours.
Well, I mean, I think, you know, what really took me to is just like talking to people that are like, even though you're a couple years older than me in my in our age group, but Gary, like Gary's in a different stage in life.He's retired.
He's looking for the word he kept on using was companionship.Yeah.And I think if even the younger people that are listening or watching right now, think about that word. Like, what does that mean?
He didn't say anything about attraction or jumping somebody's bones or something like that.He talked about companionship.I think that's super.
He's looking for a partner, you know?And I think that's interesting because I think we all are.
It's just that, you know, when we're in our younger years, we don't really realize that that's gonna be the thing that makes us so happy in the end is that person that, you know, hopefully we grow old with and we, you know, we have these experiences with to share and we look back and it's, you know, it's all puppy dogs and rainbows, right?
But we all know that's not always all puppy dogs and rainbows, but you know.It is when you have a five-year-old. Right now there's no puppy dog in there.
It doesn't seem to ever be a light at the end of the tunnel or a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but I know it's coming.
I know it's coming, I swear.
Well, thanks again, buddy.And hey guys, if you're listening and you're ready to get back out there, but you want some dating advice, or you're ready to find love, we want to hear from you.So call us, leave a voicemail with your questions.
Our number is 1-844-4IDUPOD.That's 844-443-6763.Of course, email us at idupod at iheartradio.com or follow us on the gram at idupart2pod.idupart2 is an iHeartRadio podcast where falling in love is the main objective.
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