Hello and welcome inspired podcast community.This is your new episode.My name is Caroline and my today's guest is Mary Beth Schrader and I'm so happy that she said yes to our interview.How are you doing today?
I am doing wonderful.It's so nice to be here.
Wow, thank you so much again.I would love to introduce you to the audience.You are a spiritual and transformational life coach, founder of Day One Life Coaching and creator of Addiction Recovery with the Law of Attraction.
You are an international bestselling author and host of the Spiritual Transformation Podcast.Welcome to the Inspired Podcast, Mary Beth Schrader.
Thank you so much.Thanks for having me.I'm excited to share my message.
So good to talk today.It's a new day, a new beginning, and how can the law of attraction support addiction recovery and personal transformation?
That is a great question.And I'll start out by saying, like, what is the law of attraction?Because some of your listeners might not even know, right?
So to break it down, some people think it's new age, but it's actually been around since the beginning of time, right?It's a universal law, just that everything is energy.It's been around as long as gravity has been a law, right?
So we don't get to choose of whether we're going to use gravity or not. Same thing with the law of attraction.It's always happening.We're always attracting things through energy.We are vibrational beings.
So our thoughts, our feelings, our behaviors, this is how we're attracting things throughout our day.And we have so much control. over our life, over each day, more than we realize.
And it's OK when we have a bad day, because as we sleep, we reset everything, and we wake up with a fresh, clean slate.So our energy is fresh, as long as we don't start thinking the same thoughts and having the same feelings, which most of us do.
But that's what I try to teach people is, We want to be intentional with our thoughts, deliberate with our feelings, mindful, and do things with our behaviors that are going to raise our vibration instead of lower it.
For me, I had a 30-year addiction with alcohol. And so 30 years, I'm 50 now, and I quit drinking five years ago when I was 45.And I didn't even know I was addicted because, well, I knew that I loved alcohol.Let's put it that way.
But it did start affecting me too negatively until my 40s. It's cumulative, right?It's a progressive thing where it starts affecting us worse because our bodies, as we age, everything changes.
It starts to really affect your hormones and your endocrine system.It's really started to affect my sleep in a negative way.And sleep is so important, right?That's going to make or break our day if we have a good night's sleep or not.
So, you know, it is a lower vibrational substance.And when I realized all the negative effects it was having on me, actually, I was already a life coach.And I had two businesses that I was running.I was not really dysfunctional at all.
I was a functional drinker, and I don't call myself an alcoholic.I never do that because that goes against my spiritual beliefs, my personal belief system, because I don't want to recreate that old reality, that old version of me.
I just say, I am no longer a person who needs to drink alcohol.I'm no longer that person.It's no longer an option. So some people love AA, you know, the meetings where they go to.But for me, that didn't work.
And I don't think it works for a lot of people.Because you're going in there and you're discussing the old energy, staying in the old vibration, telling the old story.And for me, what works with my personal belief system is creating that new reality.
And the more you learn about law of attraction and the more you raise your vibration, that's what happened with me.My energy shifted.I was no longer a vibrational match to alcohol, that lower vibrational substance.
So a lot of this is my addiction was to do with childhood and limiting beliefs.And I had a lot of insecurities.I was a sensitive, sensitive person.You know, a lot of people are drinking because they're very sensitive.
to energy, and that was definitely how I was.Or I had some childhood trauma.A lot of people have trauma, and we're trying to, what are we doing with any addiction?We're trying to numb ourselves.
We're trying to push down our feelings instead of, we need to really feel our feelings.And we're trying to self-soothe.We're really just looking for relief.And so we shouldn't feel ashamed that that's all we want is relief, right?
Some people do it through shopping. You know, they're filling a void.I got to shop more and spending money they don't really have.That's an addiction.So is working too much.Some people are workaholics.
And basically anything that really has a negative effect on your life that is really hard to quit, that's an addiction.So our cell phones are addictions.A lot of us can't put our cell phones away.
And we're scrolling and scrolling and wasting time when we could be the powerful creators that we were really meant to be, you know, instead of wasting time just scrolling on a cell phone.And a lot of people don't realize that even overthinking,
and negative thinking, getting in those negative thought loops with our racing thoughts, that's very addictive.We're getting dopamine hits in our brain.Relationships can be an addiction, toxic relationships.I had all of these addictions, by the way.
And the really the key to it is learning about the law of attraction, learning to raise your vibration, doing things that to set yourself up for a more to be a better creator, to attract better.
And then the better you feel, the less that you're going to have this need to self-soothe and fill voids and escape your reality.So that was a really long answer to your question.
Thank you so much for this long explanation.And first of all, congratulations, of course, for stopping that addiction, if I may say so.That way you talked about filling the void.
And the question is now, and I don't know what my next question may be, but what would you recommend?How do you fill the void now?What do you tell your clients?Is that part of your coaching?
practice, practice?Yeah, that's a great question.And everybody's so different, because we all vibrate differently.Like I said, we are vibrational beings.So it's our, our thoughts are electric, our hearts are magnetic.
So we want that alignment with our heart and our on our mind.And most of us are out of alignment.So we're so individual with this.
And a lot of it's just to do with our childhood programming, the things that we were taught and raised to think and believe, a lot of it we got from our families, right.
And so one-on-one coaching is obviously the most valuable, because I can really get in there and see
you know, what somebody's limiting beliefs are and help them to reprogram, because that's what we really need to do, is we've been conditioned, a lot of us, to think negative thoughts.
And, and most of our thoughts are the same thoughts as the day before.And so people wonder, we're living on autopilot. People wonder, like, why is my life not changing?Well, you're thinking the same thoughts.You're having the same actions.
You know, nothing's changing.You're not doing anything differently.So, of course, nothing's going to change in your life until you start being mindful, paying attention to your thoughts and your actions.
And you're going to slowly start to realize that it's not really harder.It's not more difficult to think positively.It's just that we have more practice with our negative thoughts.
So what we want to do is get, you know, practiced and change those, identify those limiting beliefs, make those subconscious thoughts, bring them out into the conscious mind where we can actually heal them, right?
Because by definition, we don't really know what our, what our subconscious mind is, you know, are all those limiting beliefs, because it's subconscious.
That's why it's really good to get help, you know, get someone to work one-on-one with, because you're going to be able to, they're going to be able to see it.It's really hard for us to see ourselves.
It's easier for other people to see, to identify those limiting beliefs, because we're just so programmed. So a lot of it's about that.And so picking up on those programs, we all have different momentum also with different subjects.
So you could have a really good momentum with money.Let's say you're really great at attracting money, and you're great in your career.But let's say you've had bad relationships in the past.
You might have a horrible momentum with, you know, and you keep attracting the same things over and over and over. So we work to change that.
We work on, OK, what are your thoughts and beliefs that are continuing the cycle of attracting somebody toxic into your life?And a lot of times it's because, like with me, I was a people pleaser growing up.
And so I was attracting people who were more like the narcissistic type and manipulative type, because those manipulative people can spot a people pleaser from miles away.Right.
And it's very it's easy to manipulate someone when you want everyone when you want to please everybody.Right.So a lot of people pleasing comes from our childhood where maybe we didn't feel seen or heard and, you know, we felt ignored and we we wanted
Well, you know what, if I'm not wanted, I'm going to make sure that I'm needed, right.So then we try to just avoid conflict.We're not being our true authentic selves.We just want people to love us.
So that's a real easy way to get involved with toxic people, because they, there's manipulative people who will take advantage of people-pleasers, right. And truthfully, you don't want to be a people pleaser anyway, because that's not your true self.
Like, actually, I was betraying myself that way, because I was telling people what they wanted to hear, instead of how I really felt, because I just didn't want any conflict.I wanted them to like me.I didn't want them to leave.Does that make sense?
Absolutely.Thank you so much.I understand now how to fill the void, how to avoid to feel not seen and heard and what we can do.And of course that the best thing you can offer to yourself is a one-on-one coaching.Okay.
So my next question, let me see what my next question is.What are the key steps to healing relationships starting with the one you have with yourself?
Well, the key steps are, number one, is self-awareness, which doesn't come overnight.It's definitely a journey.So a lot of what I was saying before would be just really, it helps to work with somebody.
But if you can't afford a coach one-on-one, there's so many free options on YouTube.I really recommend Meditation, because meditation means like getting to know oneself.And that's quieting your mind.
And you don't have to have zero thoughts in your head.People freak themselves out by going, I have to have zero thoughts.Expect thoughts to come in and out.It's going to happen.It just is human nature, right?
And, but just recognize you're not really your thoughts. You're not even your emotions.You're the witness of these.And we can just be like, oh, that's interesting.Let the thoughts flow by and just get quiet again.
And it's actually focusing on one thing.That's meditation.So if you're someone like me who tends to have racing thoughts, One way that I slow them down is through breath work.
So it's easier for someone with racing thoughts to do some guided meditations through breath work because you have something else to focus on and it gets you out of your own head, right?So I think breath work helps for me the most.
And to anyone listening, I was diagnosed with so many things when I was younger, like OCD, ADHD, depression, anxiety, and all of these labels.I mean, maybe they were true at the time, but I'm not on any medication.
We can totally control these things.A lot of times, our thoughts and feelings are out of control just because no one's ever taught us how to be self-aware and how to be mindful. And you asked about relationships.
Yeah, like not everyone is meant to be our match.So being your true authentic self, like let's say you're dating, be yourself and be OK if someone isn't your type or they don't like you.That is OK.
Like recognize don't don't worry about being rejected because what you want, you don't want to be with that person who's not your type anyway.Move on.Be yourself. And I made up this acronym for love.So L stands for lifestyle.
We need someone who has a similar lifestyle with us.We need that.We don't want someone whose future lifestyle doesn't match our true desires.And then O stands for openness, open heart.
We don't want someone with a closed heart who might be afraid of commitment and who's emotionally unavailable.So O is open heart. V might be one of the most important for me, at least, is values.
We need someone who shares the same values with us, or else they are, there's going to be a lot of trouble down the road, right?We're going to have a lot of arguments.It's not going to be a good match. And then E is Expectations.
So what are your expectations?Does somebody want to, you know, what, does one person want to live at a beach?The other person wants to live in the country, in the mountains?You know, that's huge.
Does someone want to have kids and the other person doesn't?Does, you know, like, back to lifestyle for me, L for lifestyle, like I don't drink so of someone who's drinks every day or drinks often would not be a good match for me.
So that's one way to avoid.That's a huge way to avoid toxic relationships is by making sure all of these things are in alignment with you and your true self.
and being honest and communicating these when you're on dates, and then you're going to avoid getting into a relationship with somebody who's not really a good match for you.Also, if you do drink, don't drink on the first three dates.
Do not drink on the first three dates because your judgment will be clouded.You're going to miss some red flags.If you're going to drink after that, then do.
I noticed, like when I quit drinking, I didn't get past many first dates, because I could easily see where we were out of alignment.So we just didn't even take things further.
Even if they wanted a second date, I had clear vision, like this is not going to be, this is not going to work out in the long run.
Yes, I totally understand.Thank you so much for this advice.Don't drink on the first three days you said, and I would say don't drink at all.Don't drink and drive.It's not healthy at all.It'll know your limits, of course, if you drink.
I have one last question for you.It is, what role does mindset play in achieving freedom from destructive habits and achieving life purpose?
Oh, gosh, mindset is everything.And our thoughts affect us with our feelings.And by the way, emotions are also manifestations.So our thoughts create the manifestation of whatever we're feeling, sad or happy.
But I want to encourage everyone not to suppress their feelings.Don't get mad at yourself if you're having a bad day. It's so important to feel our feelings.Even though I teach law of attraction to people, I would never teach good vibes only.
That's actually toxic positivity.Because when we push down our feelings, like we are actually, you know, just so we think we're having this great mindset because we're not feeling our feelings.
Our feelings are actually indicators and we should examine them and try to figure out why am I feeling this way?
When we suppress our feelings, they're still in our body, and they show up later as toxic behaviors, because we get triggered, especially in intimate relationships.So pushing down those feelings does not work, anybody, OK?You cannot do that.
It will show up.It actually can show up as disease, and like cancer, and a lot of this, you know, there's a mind-body connection that most people aren't aware of.
Doctors, traditional doctors, are even starting to admit, like, hey, stress causes heart attacks. That's mind-body right there.So if it works for that, it does for other things as well.
We want to feel our anger and process things, but we don't want to dwell there, right?We don't want to stay in depression.But definitely examine it and try to figure out, what is this emotion trying to tell me?
And so it's good to have the positive mindset, but also process your feelings at the same time.And it gets easier and easier.I can tell you, I used to suck at this.And now I have so much practice, it just becomes second nature.
I can go through the five stages of grief very quickly.You know what I mean?And it doesn't mean I'm not processing things.I am.But I've learned how to process them in a more efficient way. and not stay stuck.
A lot of us just stay stuck in these things where life's always going to throw us curveballs.We're always going to have things happen.You can't high-vibe your way out of negative things happening.Our parents are going to die.Our pets die.We get sick.
We lose jobs.Things happen in life. And that doesn't change.But what does change is our ability to handle those things.Our relationship with that contrast gets better and better.The higher we raise our vibration, we can learn to do that daily.
It's daily work.It's just like exercise is daily.You don't get to this point of a high vibration and get to keep it.It's daily work. And it's but like I said, it does get easier.So don't think of it as work.Maybe we should say it's daily practice.
That sounds better, doesn't it?It's a daily practice, just like when we go to the gym and we get our way.OK, I've got the perfect body.Well, you can't just stop.You've got to continue to maintain it.Right.
You've got to keep working out, keep eating healthy, things like that.And everybody has has different things that will help them raise their vibration.And you just got it's a personal thing.Not drinking definitely helps.
you know, the right foods, breathwork, meditation, I would say even just serving others, like getting out of your own head and doing some volunteer work and helping other people, that's going to really raise your vibration.
There's so many things that we can do.Listening to music, it could be something simple.Petting your cat.Go out of your way.Maybe it's just taking a nap, but do things every day that you know work for you.
and you're gonna notice your vibration slowly rising and you aren't gonna have these voids anymore.You're gonna have a spiritual energetic shift and ask for help.Say some prayers.
I love your advice.Thank you so much for sharing.I understood it has to do with self-awareness as well and the more you get into that awareness, the easier it gets, right?And yeah, so much. to share today.
I have to re-listen to this episode because there were so many nuggets in it.Thank you so much.And when people reach out to you after listening to this episode, where can we find you and do you have special offers or services?
Yeah, I'm on every platform.I'm on, you know, Facebook, TikTok, Instagram.On Instagram, it's Day 1 Life Coaching.You can look me up that way.But there's 2, 2 of us.Mine's the one with the blue checkmark that's verified.
And my name's Mary Beth Schroeder. So my website is dayonelifecoaching.com and it's spelled out d-a-y-o-n-e lifecoaching.com.There's also somebody who has the number one.Mine's d-a-y-o-n-e lifecoaching.com. And I do offer a free discovery call.
So it doesn't matter where you live.As long as you can speak English, I can work with you.And it's over Zoom.So it doesn't matter where you live.We can have one-on-one sessions.
And my free discovery call is just so you, let's say you're listening to this and you're like, hmm. Something really resonates with me here.I wonder if coaching's right for me.The free call is just so we can chat.
You could tell me a little bit about your goals and what you've been going through.Let's say you're feeling stuck in life, and you feel like maybe this spiritual recovery is what I need, this spiritual life coaching.
That would be a conversation that we would have for free, so you could decide, is it right for you?So that's at dayonelifecoaching.com.You could just fill out your information, and we'll set up a time to chat.
And yeah, like I'm on Facebook, Mary Beth Schroeder, or my, and my business one is dayonelifecoaching.And, you know, TikTok, everything.You can find me anywhere.
Oh, and I have YouTube.I have a YouTube spiritual transformation podcast with Mary Beth and you could hop on there and there's a membership.You could join a membership that gives you some benefits if you wanted to join one of those.
There's three different levels.
Exciting.I'm excited to look this all up and follow you.It was so amazing, our interview.Thank you so much, Mary Beth Trutter on the Inspired podcast today.I'm so happy.
Thank you.Hopefully we inspired some people today.
Yes, definitely.And see you in the next episode.
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