The sun's shining, birds are singing, and all feels right in the world.
Until the season changes and suddenly you lose your motivation to get out of bed.In fact, one in five people experience some form of depression no matter the season or time of year.
At the American Psychiatric Association Foundation, our vision is to build a mentally healthy nation for all because we want you to live your best life and be your best you all year round.
Please visit mentallyhealthynation.org to learn more.
okay no for real let me clear my voice because it's Saturday morning
November the 9th if you know you know and I woke up not too long ago so my voice is a little raspy and I mean it's like fresh in the morning in that like I still have my headscarf on
But I just finished sending a voice note to a homegirl, just talking about all the things that we are feeling right now.And I said, you know, we all know this, right?When we send voice notes to our friends, it's like a podcast episode.
We joke about that.We have all seen those memes on social media.
And so I said, well, while I'm talking to my homegirl, I might as well get on this mic and talk to my other homegirls too, because I've been threatening to start releasing episodes again.
And in my spirit, I'm feeling a lot of different things, just like we all are, right? I'm feeling anger.I'm feeling the urge to want to fight against things that are against me.I'm feeling like I don't know who the ops are.
I'm feeling like I want to, like, speak up for myself.I am feeling... sad and disappointed.I'm feeling hurt.I'm like... Probably feeling like I'm gonna cry right now.
But I know I'm not alone in these feelings and no, obviously that doesn't make it better.This is not one of those situations where you want company in the feelings, the bad feelings that you're feeling.
But it's just real that this is where we are right now.And this is how we feeling. Be patient with me because I didn't think any of this through.I didn't write anything down.This is just raw.
And that's a large part of the way I want to chat with you in the future is just raw because I want to be the most, be of the most impact that I can be.
And just thinking about like what my purpose is and how I'm supposed to show up for other people and like
the ways that I'm supposed to use my gifts I know that this is one of them and the world around me makes me feel like I need to package everything in a pretty box and give it to you in a way that you can consume it so that it is um
quick and easy and digestible and friendly and perfect, right?But I've never subscribed to perfection.So I need to lean into who I am and who rocks with me will rock with me and who doesn't, that's fine.
And in saying that, let me make another thing clear. What is clear to me is that as a Black woman, the grace that I extend others, the welcoming embrace that I try to give others, the way that I open my arms for others to come into my embrace is not
the way that the world welcomes me and opens its arms to me.And so I have to go where I am embraced.I have to show up for who wants to embrace me.And that's my people, my homegirls.
And for the longest, with this podcast in particular, I tried to be inclusive. I tried to not make people feel like they weren't a part of because I'm one of those people ever since I was a child.
And this is probably one in my nature, but also because I grew up with having a brother who has special needs.And I would never want anyone to make my brother feel othered or like he is not included.
or to tease him or to make him feel sad about his existence and his being.And so I've always been a person that wants to make others feel included. I am the person that will stand up to a bully.
I am the person that will say, don't speak to him or her like that.Like I've largely throughout my life been an advocate for those that I love and those that I care about.And I see this season as nothing different in that way.
It is my time to show up for those that I love and that I care about, and the people that I wanna see win.And this is no shade to anybody else, but I have to be real in this moment.Like Issa said, I'm rooting for everybody black.
I'ma say it again, I'm rooting for everybody black.And like my grandmother used to say, growing up she would always say, And y'all probably heard this before, all skin folk and kin folk.And I do understand that.
But the people who rock with me, I want you to know that I rock with you.Like, don't question it.Don't question it.And I am here for you, for us to be in community together.And so I want to be clear about that.
because the way that I've been feeling is like, this is, I felt it in my spirit to say this specifically.
And this I felt the other day, just to be very specific about who I'm here for and who I'm here to serve with the messages that I deliver within this podcast.
And I shouldn't even, I don't even like saying the messages that I deliver because I'm not a reverend, I'm not delivering sermons, right?I'm just coming here to be of help in hopefully my way that I'm able to do that.
That's not saying that I have all the answers or anything like that.It's just saying that if I can be a resource and if I can share the things that I know and it will help somebody else that looks like me, then that's what I want to do.
So some of the things that I've been thinking about in preparation for this next season of having this wild wannabe dictator as the leader of the United States of America, one of the things that I want to do or that's been on my mind is obviously community.
What does that look like for us to be collective and pool our resources?
One of the things that was amazing to see for me was the way that black women were able to rally together and raise money in such a short amount of time for Kamala Harris's campaign and
We did what I don't even know that we knew we could do with raising that kind of money in a short amount of time.And I was on the call that was hosted.Let me see.I'm scrolling through right now.I don't want to mess up the name of the organization.
um it is called win with black women on instagram and i was on the call that they hosted the sunday evening before election day and seeing the women rally together to raise
to get to that three million that was the goal on the call that night like so star jones is i'm gonna just call her the treasurer because i don't know the official name that they gave her but she was in charge of the money right and so she came on and she was saying where we were with the fundraising and where she wanted us to be
by the end of that night, I think ideally.And she didn't put a time exact time frame on it, at least I don't remember her saying it.
But what I know is that toward the end of the call, after everyone had spoken, and we were all filled up with all this goodness that had been shared from our elders to the current women who are at the forefront of the fight for change.
It was like a kind of like an extended
amount of time like all right let's this is the after show now and in that after show star jones shared her screen and we watched as we all rallied together and live the fundraising went over that three million mark i think it ended up at like three million seventy thousand it once we got off the line and it was just like if we could pull together like this on a regular basis
We are unstoppable and that's what they're afraid of.So some of the things that have come up for me and I've already started to put into motion
is I wanna get together a small group of my close friends and rally together around finances and financial literacy and financial education, financial empowerment, financial expansion.I don't have it all planned out.I'm not a financial girly, okay?
But I do know that one of the things that will be important, and it's always important, right, is money. how you utilize it and how you make it work for you, that is a crucial thing.
And so I have already tried to put a, I reached out to the people that, you know, I thought, hey, they may want to be involved in this.It's very, very small, very, very small.
So if you know me in real life and I didn't reach out to you, please don't take offense.It's just very, very small. And what I'm trying to do is just start.I just want to start.
If you know me and you've been rocking with me for any number of years, you know I'm about that action.I'm just a person that's like, hmm, let's go ahead and start.
Which is another reason why I sat down to record this in my scarf with my faux locs just taken out and my hair needing to be combed out, my braids, my blow plaits that you use for the faux locs, me needing to
take those down, comb them out, wash my hair, do all the things but I just felt like I needed to just start by showing up right now to holla at you real quick because I know we're all feeling a lot of different things and
It's easy to get consumed with all the social media messaging like I have been to and some of it is good But some of it just creates a lot more fear than we need in this moment We need reality checks, but we don't want to just be low so fearful that we paralyzed But so I was like, all right, let's just go cuz I'm about that action.
Let's just let's just do this.Let me record right now because I just got finished doing a 15-minute voice note to my homegirl, so let me show up and chat to my other homegirls, so. One of the things I'm thinking is about finances, right?
And how we can get together in small groups just to pool our resources, our knowledge, what we know, how we can be stronger.Some of the top of mind things are figuring out your debt and what is your plan to get from under that debt?
Because if interest rates and those types of things start getting higher, you just don't want to be in a position where you are owing a ton of money and your interest rates are ridiculous.
And this is not me speaking as a financial expert or savvy in that type of way at all.This is just me using common sense and just thinking through and telling you what I'm thinking.
So meeting in small groups to better yourself with regard to what you know about finances and how you can be stronger. I am also taking heed to the advice that has been given on social media about planning with your OBGYN.
If you don't have an appointment with your OBGYN, get that on the books.Especially if you are of a certain age and you either don't want to have children or you do want to have children.
Just in general, though, I think that because we don't know who the ops are, you need to get an appointment on the books and just fill out your provider, period.Know if this is somebody that you can trust in life and with your health care, right?
I'm also thinking about ways that I can strengthen the things that I'm already doing so that I am put in a position of, and this is just, this is not finances, this is just in general, right?
How I'm showing up and the things that I'm doing already so that I can strengthen those positions that I already have.
so that I can continue to use them and create strength from them instead of the opposite, instead of being run over, instead of being pushed off by the wayside, all of those things.
Another thought is, how do we help ourselves to position our skill sets, our knowledge base, and making ourselves an asset? And that is not saying by overworking yourself, it is saying, how can we think more strategically?
How can we be a little bit more bullish about the things that we know and do?And how we put it out there into the world for consumption, whatever that looks like, at your employer, if you're an entrepreneur, it doesn't matter.
It's all the same beast, right?How are you putting it out there for consumption?And how can you be more strategic about that?
I'm also thinking about the spaces and ways that I can lean into creating joy for myself and where I'm going to find that from.
Some of the things that I've been doing lately, even before election day, is I said that I wanted to really start painting. And so I finally just said, stop thinking about painting in an apartment and just make it a reality.
Because I was like, where am I going to paint?Where am I going to put these supplies?Like all those things, right?And so I just went and got a whole bunch of stuff.And you know, my favorite place to get this stuff is Five Below.
If you have a Five Below by you, don't even bother going to Hobby Lobby because I think we already know what type of time they on.
But if you go to five below or some like big lots those type of places They have the supplies that you need and it's probably cheaper I got a bunch of canvases white canvases to paint on from five below and paint acrylic paint like for cheap and
So, yeah, if you're interested in that, that's a little tip.But I went and got a bunch of supplies and I just started with the paint by numbers canvases, just so that I could kind of like have a guide, right, initially.
And now I'm just moving into the space where... What is that noise? Why they want to be making noise while I'm trying to record?I'll tell you.Apartment living.But anyway.
Just now I'm in the space where I am just freestyle painting and I haven't gotten deep into it. I still overthink it a little bit, like, what are we going to paint next?
But, you know, I'm really just trying to lean into the joy that I feel of just, like, doing something that feels nostalgic too.Most of us used to paint as a kid, right?Whatever that looked like, whether it was in school, at home, whatever.
A paintbrush, it has a nostalgic feeling to me.So I'm just trying to lean into that because that brings me joy.Like tomorrow, I have reservations to go to the Whitney Museum because it's free on Sundays and on Fridays, I think.
right now, maybe not always, but right now, in November of 2024.Right now, it's free on those days.And on Fridays, it's after five.And so I'm gonna go tomorrow.First, I have a stretch appointment.
That's another thing that brings me relaxation, joy, and connection also.So I'm gonna go to my stretch appointment and then I am going to go to the Whitney and take in some beautiful art.
And so I'm just trying to do things that feel good to me and I have been doing that already and I want to keep more of that going.
So yeah, I feel like I'm about to wrap it up now because this is just like when you send in a voice note to the homegirl, right?It's like, wait a minute.Okay, I've been talking too long now.I've been running my mouth.
But would love for y'all to tap in with me if you listen to this, if you feel any type of way, anything you want to share with me. I would love for you to tap in on either TikTok or Instagram.I think I'm gonna start trying to do more TikToks.
I don't know what that looks like.And then I'm like, damn, do you even like do TikToks and invest your time in it as this fool might be trying to Shut it down.I Don't know but you know for right now, I can't worry about that.
I'm gonna just do what I do.Whatever.I might do more tick tocks You most of y'all know you can always find me on instagram at a yana a h y i a na dot angel Hit me up.
Let me know if you listen, let me know if you are thinking some of the same things I'm thinking and
I also feel like I want to create space for us to get together virtually, maybe host some Zooms, things like that, so that we could just be in community like we were before.
And I will say this, I apologize for disappearing sort of like the way that I did. You just get, there's no excuse.I'm not making excuses, but I'm just gonna chat through real quick.
Like what went into that, it's like, oh, first it's like, oh, leave the podcast while you on a high.Then you start doing other things and you realize like,
A part of you showing up for the podcast was a part of the magic that was you showing up in this space, right?And then you start to feel like, dang, am I losing my voice because I'm not doing this anymore?
And then you start to, I'm just keeping it really real with y'all.Then you start to see so many other people doing it.And for me, I hate to do the things that other people are doing, especially when they're doing it lame.
And then it's like, ah, do I even bother?And then you start to think like, ah, well, if I will show back up, I gotta show back up and it's gotta be a big bang and I gotta do it like this and I gotta do it like that.
Just like all the things, all the pressure that we put on ourselves.But right now I'm in a season of, giving little fucks about what anybody else thinks, about what their perception is, all of those things.
Like, I'm just about to start doing me and I'm encouraging you to start doing the same thing.
So the things that you want to do, the things that you've been putting off, the things, the ideas that you've been holding on to, let's just start doing that stuff.Let's start doing it because we see now that
You actually have nothing to lose in the way that the world don't think highly of you anyway.So there's nothing to lose.And they're not checking for you. So it's fine.Let's check for each other.How about that?Let's check for each other.
Let's make each other stronger together.It's just like I said, you know, the power of the group of women who were able to get on a line with when with black women and raise that kind of capital to support another sister in a short amount of time.
That right there is magical.And if we could just keep that same energy and that same sentiment, like, whew, that's all I'll say. Because you already know what that means.If you know, you know.
I also love that now I don't have to explain a lot of things.It's us.We already know most of this.So yeah, I'm going to stop running my mouth now.Thank you for spending time with me as always.I appreciate you.
And I don't know, did I complete my thought of why I had kind of disappeared?Maybe I'll get into more of it another day.Like I said, this was not well thought out in the sense that I don't have notes or anything.
I'm just coming to you raw from the heart.I have also been journaling via voice notes on my phone for the last probably over a year.And that's what this is for me too.
I don't know what I'm thinking and feeling all the time and I have a pen in it and I know exactly what it is.No! Sometimes I just need to talk it out, talk it through.And so I hope that I'm able to once again resurface creating a safe space for you.
I hope that you are able to embrace me and create a safe space for me.And I hope that we are able to continue to win together, because I love us.We got to win. Y'all we got, baby!Oh, sending you big love, big hugs, and I'll talk to you soon.
I give all to my sister's own welfare.Two pockets, don't nobody else care.Check, I know they like to beat you down a lot.And when you come around the block, brothers squabble a lot.But please, don't cry, dry your eyes, never let up.
Forgive, but don't forget.Girl, keep your head up.And when he tells you you ain't nothing, don't believe him.And if he can't learn to love you, you should leave him.Because sister, you don't need him.And I ain't trying to cash up.
I just call it how I see it.You know what makes me unhappy? Now since we all came from a woman, got our names from a woman, and our game from a woman, I wonder why we take from our women, why we rape our women, do we hate our women?
I think it's time we kill for our women, time to heal our women.
The sun shining, birds are singing, and all feels right in the world.
Until the season changes and suddenly you lose your motivation to get out of bed.In fact, one in five people experience some form of depression no matter the season or time of year.
At the American Psychiatric Association Foundation, our vision is to build a mentally healthy nation for all because we want you to live your best life and be your best you all year round.
Please visit mentallyhealthynation.org to learn more.
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