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Episode: You are not alone.

Author: Michelle Chestovich MD
Duration: 00:09:26

Episode Shownotes

Physician coach Michelle Chestovich MD shares how normalizing our struggles is the fist step towards feeling better.Sign up for "notes done faster" masterclass and get placed in the drawing for free registration to Stress Rx group coaching.

Click here:https://mamadoclifecoaching.myflodesk.com/q7jopfafdjCMEfy link: The CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/pTRFUg

Full Transcript

00:00:00 Speaker_00
You are listening to Episode 156 of the Remind Yourself Podcast. Welcome to the Remind Yourself Podcast, the podcast for physician moms just like you who want to ditch mom guilt, stop yelling, and start enjoying their lives today.

00:00:21 Speaker_00
I'm your host, Rachelle Chestevich, certified life coach, family physician, and mom of four. If you want to overcome overwhelm for once and for all, this is the place for you. Hello, Mama Docs, and welcome back.

00:00:39 Speaker_00
Before I get started, I want to let you know that if you are at home at night charting and on the weekends you are charting, catching up on all the things, you need to pause this episode and click on the show notes and come to my masterclass on Sunday, March 10th.

00:00:56 Speaker_00
I'm going to teach you strategies that are going to gain you back hours of your time. And oh, by the way, did I let you know that I'm going to be doing a drawing from people who are signing up for my next group program? Yes, you heard me correctly.

00:01:09 Speaker_00
I'm going to be doing a drawing from people who sign up to join my StressRx program that's going to be beginning in beginning of April. So.

00:01:16 Speaker_00
There are two reasons why you should stop right now, obviously not if you're driving, but just take a moment, click on the link on the show notes and sign up.

00:01:25 Speaker_00
If you're already on my email list, I highly advise you sign up again so that you will be in the drawing to be chosen to get a free registration for my upcoming group program.

00:01:35 Speaker_00
Okay, that is the important news that I wanna make sure that I share with all of you. Today, now I'm going to get into a topic that is pretty near and dear to me, and it's letting you know that no matter what you're going through, you are not alone.

00:01:52 Speaker_00
This week, on March 5th, was the third anniversary of my sister Gretchen Butler's death. And I continue to share her story because I love her so much and she was such an incredible woman.

00:02:03 Speaker_00
And I also want you to know that our brains too get sick, we too are humans, and that help is available. If you've not ever listened to episode 11, which I recorded a week after my sister died, I highly advise you do so. It's called exhaustion.

00:02:20 Speaker_00
And I talk about one of, I think, the leading contributors to my sister's death. Obviously, her death by suicide was multifactorial, but sleep deprivation very much contributed.

00:02:31 Speaker_00
And I highly advise you go back, take a listen, and share it with others in your organization, particularly administrators. I think it's helpful for them to realize that when we're asked

00:02:43 Speaker_00
to do more and more and we are affecting our sleep, there can be dire consequences. Okay, so I'm not going to talk all about that today, but I'm a very big proponent for getting adequate sleep and normalizing our mental health.

00:02:57 Speaker_00
So this comes back to the concept that I want you to hear today is you are not alone. When we feel like we're the only ones struggling, number one, we get embarrassed and ashamed and we hide and we think everybody else has it all together.

00:03:13 Speaker_00
I'm going to let you know that's 100% not true. We are all humans on earth and we all have struggles at different times. And it doesn't mean that you're a failure, that you're having a hard time right now.

00:03:26 Speaker_00
So if you are struggling with getting your notes done and you think, wow, why does everybody else get it all done? What am I doing wrong? I want you to know that you're not alone and that help is available.

00:03:38 Speaker_00
As I previously mentioned, signed up and come to my class, that will be one step. But the main takeaway I want you to hear is that you are not alone in these struggles.

00:03:48 Speaker_00
You are not the only one in your organization, in your clinic, who at times feels like an imposter. You have these thoughts on repeat and then you think that they're true. It's not true. Doubt is part of being human.

00:04:02 Speaker_00
And particularly in our profession, there are a lot of things that we need to learn. But you're not alone in feeling that way. You are not a fraud. And the fact that you have thoughts that sometimes say that you are, you are not alone in that.

00:04:16 Speaker_00
You are also not alone in feeling that you should be doing more as a mom and that you are failing. I have the privilege to speak with physician women every day, and I hear time and again the same struggles. We think we should be doing more.

00:04:33 Speaker_00
We think that our children are struggling in their life because we aren't showing up for them fully. And I just want you to know that you're not alone. Help is available for you to support you while your kids are struggling, right?

00:04:47 Speaker_00
But so often we high achievers blame ourselves for any kind of struggles that other people in our family are having. We think that we should be fixing it all. And in that too, you're not alone.

00:04:57 Speaker_00
Of course we think we should be able to solve all the problems. Of course we think that we need to pick up all the slack because this is how we've been trained. You are not alone in this.

00:05:08 Speaker_00
You are not alone if your relationship is going through a tough time. Humans and relationships have challenges. There is nothing wrong with you. You are not alone. You are going through a tough time right now.

00:05:23 Speaker_00
And what really helps in these few examples that I gave is just to normalize. Ah, I'm human. Life is hard at times. And I am not the problem. What I really love is for women to come together and share these things. But again, there's such stigma.

00:05:43 Speaker_00
I don't want to admit that I'm struggling because then again, I feel like it just amplifies that I'm not doing it right.

00:05:49 Speaker_00
So I'm here to say that you are not alone, and that we all have our struggles, and when we can come together and talk about it, it makes everything so much easier.

00:05:57 Speaker_00
There are so many reasons why I love my group program, StressRx, for physician women, but one of my favorite things, besides teaching you all kinds of tools that you're gonna be able to use to make you feel more confident, more empowered in your life, I love coming together as a group of women and normalizing our struggles.

00:06:17 Speaker_00
Right away, people are like, wow, such a relief to know that I'm not the only one. Yes, let me say it again. You are not alone. There are so many other women physicians who are also struggling.

00:06:33 Speaker_00
And again, this is not coming together as a pity party, like, oh my God, life is so horrible. That's not at all what we do in the group. But we can normalize this. And then from this place, now we can learn tools in order to feel better.

00:06:45 Speaker_00
You don't come to the group program because you're broken and you need to be fixed. I remind you again and again, you are whole and amazing.

00:06:52 Speaker_00
And we've been socialized to think that we need to do all of the things and we feel really bad when we're not able to, you know, be superhuman. Simple message for you today. No matter what you're going through, you're not alone.

00:07:07 Speaker_00
And it's really helpful to speak to somebody that you feel safe with and let them know that you're struggling. And it could be as simple as, I just can't figure out how to get meals on the table every day for my family and keep up with the, you know,

00:07:22 Speaker_00
groceries and the laundry. Sometimes we just don't even like to talk about this because to us that's admitting that we've done something wrong. Ladies, I'm going to remind you, you are incredible women.

00:07:35 Speaker_00
You are amazing mothers and amazing sisters and daughters and partners and physicians. And you are also a human being who has struggles in life. Nothing's got wrong here. You are not alone.

00:07:50 Speaker_00
And if you would love to join community, I will let you know that the group program, StressRx for Physician Women, the doors are going to be opening on March 11th through March 18th.

00:08:00 Speaker_00
We are getting registrants for the April program that will be starting very soon. Come join community. Come join others and learn tools that help you feel empowered, much more in control, and just more content in this life. Okay, that's it for today.

00:08:19 Speaker_00
You are not alone. And start by joining the masterclass that I'm doing on Sunday. Click on the link in the show notes. Come be with me. Come be in community. Learn that you're not alone in these struggles with all of the notes and messages and refills.

00:08:36 Speaker_00
You are not a failure and you will learn simple strategies that will help you gain back hours of your time.

00:08:43 Speaker_00
Okay, my dear friends, in honor of Gretchen, please remind yourself on the regular that you are not alone and that you are worthy and deserving of caring for just like everybody else in your life. Until next week, peace and love to all of you.

00:09:02 Speaker_00
Are you ready to take control of your life and put these tools into action? I'm here to help. I offer free consultations for physician moms to see if my one-on-one coaching package is right for you.

00:09:15 Speaker_00
You can sign up for a free consult at www.MamaDocLifeCoach.com.