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The High Cost of Not Letting Go AI transcript and summary - episode of podcast Craig Groeschel Leadership Podcast

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Episode: The High Cost of Not Letting Go

The High Cost of Not Letting Go

Author: Life.Church
Duration: 00:21:09

Episode Shownotes

Great leaders care deeply about accomplishing their mission. But is it possible to care too much? In today’s podcast, Craig shares a better way to lead your organization into the future and the high cost of not letting go. Watch video and download the leader guide: https://www.life.church/leadershippodcast/the-high-cost-of-not-letting-go/

Summary

In "The High Cost of Not Letting Go", Craig Groeschel explores the essential balance leaders must achieve between their passion for their mission and the importance of letting go. He dispels misconceptions about leadership, arguing that excessive control can hinder organizational growth and that leaders must delegate authority to cultivate emerging leaders. Groeschel emphasizes that trusting others not only empowers them but also fosters a more effective organization, ultimately enhancing the overall mission. His insights provide a roadmap for leaders striving for meaningful progress both personally and within their organizations.

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Full Transcript

00:00:00 Speaker_00
What I know about you as a leader is you care about your mission and the people you lead. But what if I told you it's possible to care too much? Your care can actually become counterproductive.

00:00:12 Speaker_00
The title of today's episode is The Cost of Not Letting Go. Hey, it's great to have you back for another episode of the Craig Rochelle Leadership Podcast. Our mission is to help you become a leader that people love to follow.

00:00:28 Speaker_00
And we're going to work really, really hard to bring you content each month that helps you grow in your leadership. If you're new to our community, I want to tell you about the Leader Guide. This is something that you need to get.

00:00:40 Speaker_00
We've got a detailed summary. We've got additional questions and information, all sorts of tools and resources to help you grow with your team. Go to life.church slash leadership podcast. Just ask for the Leader Guide.

00:00:53 Speaker_00
We'll send it with the release of each episode. Also, if this content is helpful to you, hit subscribe right now wherever you consume the content. If you haven't rated or reviewed the material, that would be helpful as well.

00:01:08 Speaker_00
And I want to say a big thank you to those of you who are inviting others to be a part on social media. If you post and tag me, we may repost you. Those of you on YouTube,

00:01:17 Speaker_00
tell us where you're watching from, and if you have any type of question about leadership, I'd love to hear from you. In fact, I might do an episode or two specifically addressing your questions.

00:01:29 Speaker_00
If you have a question, you can email it to leadership at life.church, or if you're on YouTube, you can ask a question in the comment section, and I look forward to hearing your questions and answering those in an episode soon.

00:01:42 Speaker_00
Now, let's dive into new content today. Today, we're going to talk about some counterintuitive leadership ideas. If you're relatively new to leading, you likely embrace some common leadership misconceptions. I'll give you three.

00:01:59 Speaker_00
These are three beliefs that I used to have and three common misconceptions I see in newer leaders. Number one, we tend to think that to grow bigger, you must do more. Number two, to lead better, you must get closer.

00:02:15 Speaker_00
Number three, to lead bigger, you have to know more. To grow bigger, you must do more. To lead better, you must get closer. To lead bigger, you have to know more. Remember, these are common misconceptions.

00:02:28 Speaker_00
And the reason that these things are easy to believe is because there is some truth in them. For example, early on to grow bigger, you do have to work harder. You do have to do more than other people.

00:02:40 Speaker_00
To go farther, to impact more, you need to be hands-on. You need to care about your mission. To lead bigger, you do need to know a lot about a lot of different things, but...

00:02:52 Speaker_00
What's seemingly necessary early will inevitably limit your leadership later. Let me say it again. Whatever you think you really have to do early on, if you don't change the way you think, it will limit your leadership later.

00:03:07 Speaker_00
What's seemingly necessary early will inevitably limit your leadership later. I'll try to explain it this way.

00:03:15 Speaker_00
In jiu-jitsu, if you don't know what jiu-jitsu is, if you're watching MMA, whenever the fighters drop to the ground and start rolling around each other, that's jiu-jitsu.

00:03:23 Speaker_00
In jiu-jitsu, there's a saying, whoever controls the distance controls the fight. Whoever controls the distance controls the fight.

00:03:33 Speaker_00
For example, an inexperienced fighter might be preparing to defend himself or herself, and they may stand one or two feet away from the opponent. The problem is, if you're a couple of feet away from the opponent, you are within striking distance.

00:03:47 Speaker_00
Your attacker can strike you with a fist, an elbow, a knee, a foot, a headbutt, or whatever. So an experienced fighter is gonna do what? he or she is going to manage the distance. There are two places that are safer than in the striking zone.

00:04:03 Speaker_00
One is to get farther away. You're out of the striking range. Or two, you actually get really, really close. You get close enough to wrap up the opponent. It's counterintuitive.

00:04:13 Speaker_00
You don't tend to think that being close is safe, but if you can get really, really close, you can eliminate their strength in a blow. When you're in an offensive position, you always try to close the distance.

00:04:25 Speaker_00
If you're attacking, you want to be close. But when you're defending, you want to create space or distance. No matter what, you want to control the distance. This is similar in leadership.

00:04:38 Speaker_00
There is a time that you want to be really, really close, and there's a time that you want to strategically create some distance.

00:04:44 Speaker_00
There are times you want to be hands-on, and in leadership, there are times you strategically want to and need to be hands-off.

00:04:52 Speaker_00
I say it this way, you want to be sometimes strategically present, other times, and oftentimes, and this is counterintuitive, you actually want to be strategically absent.

00:05:03 Speaker_00
Now, when you are strategically absent, this doesn't mean you don't care about the outcome. You always do care, but you're not controlling the outcome, and this is very, very important. If your organization cannot be effective without you,

00:05:19 Speaker_00
your organization is limited by you. If they can't be effective without your presence, then you are the greatest limiting factor to progress. Let me tell you right now, you are the ceiling. So let's talk about our title.

00:05:33 Speaker_00
What is the cost of not letting go? When you care too much When you're over-controlling, you actually create three massive problems. What are they? Let's talk about them.

00:05:46 Speaker_00
When you don't let go, number one, you will limit the growth of your developing leaders. Number two, you will limit the tenure of your strongest leaders. Number three, you will limit the impact of your organizational mission. What's going to happen?

00:06:01 Speaker_00
You're going to limit the growth of your developing leaders, the tenure of your strongest leaders, and the impact of your organizational mission. So let's break these down one by one because they are ridiculously important. Number one,

00:06:13 Speaker_00
If you are too controlling, you will limit the growth of your developing leaders. I'm going to talk about something we've talked about a million times before, and we're going to talk about a million times again.

00:06:24 Speaker_00
If you are too controlling, you will never raise strong leaders. Why? Because you can have control, or you can have growth, but you can't have both. At some point, the good news is you're gonna realize, I can't do it all anymore.

00:06:41 Speaker_00
And so you're gonna decide, okay, I'm finally gonna delegate something. How and what you delegate matters more than you can ever imagine. And here's what tends to happen in most scenarios. Most leaders are simply gonna delegate tasks.

00:06:57 Speaker_00
They're essentially going to say, hey, junior beginner leader, do exactly what I tell you to do. And quite honestly, sometimes you have to start there, but you do not want to stay there.

00:07:09 Speaker_00
You don't want to be overbearing and always breathing over their shoulder, making sure they do it exactly the way that you want them to do. If you do that, you're going to be limiting them and the potential in your organization.

00:07:20 Speaker_00
And I've said it a billion times before, you're going to hear it again. When you delegate tasks, you create followers.

00:07:28 Speaker_00
When you tell them to do specifically what you want them to do, how you want them to do it, when you want them to do it, you are creating people who know how to follow orders. When you delegate tasks, you create followers.

00:07:39 Speaker_00
But when you delegate authority, you create leaders. What is the difference? A task is do this in this specific way. Giving them authority is, here's the project. I trust you to figure out how. Here's the outcome that we desire.

00:07:55 Speaker_00
You go and design assist to get the designated outcome. That's delegating authority. And there is a big difference between delegating authority and delegating task.

00:08:05 Speaker_00
The biggest difference is the outcome and what delegating authority does to the leader who's learning how to create something that brings about the desired outcome. So what do we know about developing leaders in your organization or people around you?

00:08:20 Speaker_00
Whenever you trust a developing leader, they feel honored, and they really want to please you. And here's what's interesting.

00:08:29 Speaker_00
If you're giving them a project, while you can only devote a portion of your energy to that project, they can devote the majority of their energy to the project.

00:08:38 Speaker_00
And they may struggle at first, they often do, I promise you, but with coaching and with time, they will get better. And one day that leader could become great, possibly and probably even better than you. And here's what's so much fun.

00:08:53 Speaker_00
When they start to focus on something, they specialize, they get really good an assignment, a task, a project, an area of focus, they will often eventually do what you used to do exceedingly better than you did because they become experts.

00:09:08 Speaker_00
They specialize. And this is when everyone starts winning. What happens? They feel valued because they're making a difference. They grow. They know that you trust them. They're getting better. They're making a contribution to the organization.

00:09:20 Speaker_00
And what happens to you? Your time is freed up. You have a rising leader with you and your whole organization gets better. Now, some of you are gonna say, but okay, Craig, what if I develop them

00:09:34 Speaker_00
and they get better and they leave, that's a fair question. And they might, like you may help them get better, like, hey, I got what I need here and they go get a promotion somewhere else, that's a fair question.

00:09:45 Speaker_00
But a better question is this, most people ask, what if I develop them and they leave? A better question is this, what if you don't help them get better and they stay? This is on you.

00:09:55 Speaker_00
One of your biggest assignments, calling, missions as a leader is to help develop the people around you, and you cannot develop them if you do not trust them. Hey, Craig here.

00:10:06 Speaker_00
We'll get back to the episode in just a minute, but I wanted to, first of all, share a resource that I think you'll find helpful to your leadership. There's a secret that I've learned about leadership, and we know it.

00:10:16 Speaker_00
The best leaders are almost always the best readers. Why? Because your influence and impact are, in many ways, a result of the books and ideas that you take in.

00:10:27 Speaker_00
So as I look back over my years of leadership, there are 44 books that rise to the top as books that I believe that every leader should read. So our team has curated the list and organized it into the areas that you'll want to grow in.

00:10:42 Speaker_00
To get this free list, go to life.church slash 44 books. That's the number four and four, life.church slash 44 books. And I hope this will be a gift to you to dig into a list of great books. Get reading and keep leading. Now, back to the episode.

00:11:01 Speaker_00
Your need to control, it creates three problems. Number one, we talked about it. You limit the growth if you're developing leaders. The second thing is, you'll limit the tenure of your strongest leaders.

00:11:16 Speaker_00
If you are over-controlling, plain and simple, if you don't let your best leaders lead, your best leaders will eventually leave. Let me say it again. This is so important. Please hear me.

00:11:30 Speaker_00
If you don't empower them, if you don't trust them, if you don't let your best leaders lead, your best leaders will eventually lead. We see it all the time.

00:11:40 Speaker_00
Truth is, anytime I work with any kind of organization, and maybe I'm talking to a very talented senior leader, a CEO, a lead pastor, or whatever, I'm always looking at the next two layers. I'm going to see the leaders below the point leader.

00:11:53 Speaker_00
I'm going to see the next leader down. And anytime the next two layers are weaker, what I always know every single time is that senior leader is too controlling every single time without exception.

00:12:06 Speaker_00
On our team, I am indescribably thankful for the leaders, the next several layers of leaders. And I'm also thankful we have almost no turnover at the top of our organization.

00:12:18 Speaker_00
In fact, the three leaders that I serve with, Jerry, Bobby, and Sam, we call them the DLT, the Directional Leadership Team. These leaders have been with me for 26 of the 28 years of our church. I'm extraordinarily thankful.

00:12:30 Speaker_00
People ask, how do you keep your team together? And I need to tell you. There are lots of factors, too many to talk about here, but at the top of the list is that I have to trust them, empower them, and let them lead. They lead. They create.

00:12:45 Speaker_00
They have ideas. They get to implement their ideas. They get credit for their ideas. They get promoted and they get celebrated. Their opinion matters. Why? Because they have real, valuable influence.

00:13:00 Speaker_00
Some people ask me sometimes, like, what is the secret to Life.Church continuing to grow and reach more people 28 years into it? I'll tell you right now, it is not me. It is not me. It's not my gifts. It's not my leadership.

00:13:12 Speaker_00
It is the power of God through a team of world-class leaders. And the trust has to go deep into the organization, not just to a layer below or two below it. deep into the organization to trusting and empowering the people on the front lines.

00:13:31 Speaker_00
You can tell how strong a team is by how deep the trust goes. And I'll tell you this right now, you can never be big if you don't trust deep. You have to start at the top and trust deeper and deeper and empower more.

00:13:44 Speaker_00
And it's not easy and it takes time and it doesn't always go perfectly, but you have to do it. You will never get there overnight. But you have to get there. You have to make progress.

00:13:54 Speaker_00
If you as a leader are not doing less today, fewer things today, focusing in on the more important things today than you were a year ago, you are the limiting factor in your organization.

00:14:05 Speaker_00
You are limiting the other leaders around you and not letting them get better. And you're decreasing the likelihood that they're going to stay with you. You're going to say, OK. I believe you and I want to do this, but what if I don't trust my leaders?

00:14:21 Speaker_00
Maybe not just trust their character, but what if you don't trust their abilities? Well, if you don't trust your leaders, either you have not developed them or you have the wrong leaders. Either way, the problem is yours to solve. Let me say this again.

00:14:36 Speaker_00
If you do not trust your leaders, is on you. Either you haven't developed them, you haven't helped them grow to the point where their leadership potential is effective, or you have the wrong people around you.

00:14:51 Speaker_00
And either way, this problem is yours to solve. It's on you. As leaders, our unwillingness to let go, it creates three massive problems. What happens? Number one is we limit the growth of our developing leaders.

00:15:06 Speaker_00
The second thing is we limit the tenure of our strongest leaders. The third thing is if you are too controlling, number three is you will limit the impact of your organizational mission. You will do it. You will be the limiting factor. Why?

00:15:18 Speaker_00
Because you can't do it all. You can't know it all. You can't be an expert in every single area. You can't. You will stop the growth. So, if you don't let go, you'll become the greatest limiting force to your future impact. Give you a little story.

00:15:38 Speaker_00
I've told this before, but it was a game-changing moment. Two and a half years into the church, Jerry Hurley was attending. And if you're watching along, I'll show you some photos of Jerry. He was a district manager for Target.

00:15:53 Speaker_00
He helped oversee 11 stores. I was in my late 20s and I invited Jerry to come on staff. And after a lot of praying, his family made one of the most ridiculous sacrifices I've ever seen and joined us.

00:16:05 Speaker_00
And he came to me soon into his leadership and he said, hey, we need to buy a copier. And I think the copier was $700. And I said, we are not going to buy a copier. And I told Jerry very confidently, we will never, ever own a copier.

00:16:22 Speaker_00
That's how dumb I was. Dumber than dumb. We'll never own a copier. There's Kinko's. You can drive to Kinko's. He just kind of looked at me and he was older than I was, exceedingly more seasoned in leadership than I was.

00:16:34 Speaker_00
And he said, hey, we need to buy a copier. And he said, if you'll trust me on this and let me do what I know how to do, then you can do what you do best. And together we can impact this city and maybe much more.

00:16:46 Speaker_00
And that conversation was like life changing for me. That's what I did. I trusted him and he did what he knew how to do. And he trusted me and I did what I knew how to do. And together we impacted our city and a lot more.

00:16:59 Speaker_00
At the time, I was the best at recognizing talent and calling in people until Jerry Hurley came on. And he was as good then or better, and now he is exceedingly better than I am. He has helped create a world-class leadership development culture.

00:17:14 Speaker_00
And if I didn't let him do it, he wouldn't stay. If I didn't trust him, he wouldn't have helped me get better. If I didn't trust and empower him, he wouldn't have gotten better. And everyone wins when the leader gets better. You have to trust.

00:17:28 Speaker_00
You have to trust. Remember, trust is the currency of organizational progress. Without trust, there is no lasting progress. I am thankful that my top leaders will tell you if you ask them that we trust each other implicitly.

00:17:46 Speaker_00
I know what it means to be hands-on, and I was way, way more hands-on early on because it was more important and strategic then, But I know when to give them distance. I know when to give them space. I know when to give them freedom.

00:17:59 Speaker_00
And let me just be real clear, I am still the senior pastor. You say, I am the boss. I answer to God for the direction of our church. But even at that, it is exceedingly rare that I ever make what I would call a solo top-down decision.

00:18:17 Speaker_00
I mean, it's almost never do I come in and say, this is the way it's gonna be. Why? Because I don't have to.

00:18:23 Speaker_00
In fact, if you ask my top leaders, they would tell you it's probably one time, maybe every three to five years, like literally one time, maybe in the last, I'd say five years, where I'd come in and say, kind of like, thus sayeth the Lord, like, this is what we're doing.

00:18:38 Speaker_00
And you may say, okay, Craig, like, why don't you lead stronger more often? And the reason is because I am not the most important, I'm not the smartest, I'm not the best, I'm just a good player on a great team. And that's the way it works.

00:18:48 Speaker_00
I'm effective at what I do, and I'm doing my job, my calling with people who are ridiculously effective at what they do. And you're going to ask me, were they always great? And the answer is like, no, they actually weren't.

00:19:00 Speaker_00
When Jerry came on, all I knew was business, and I had to teach him the pastoral side of business. But all I knew was pastoring. He had to teach me the business side of pastoring, and together we got better.

00:19:09 Speaker_00
It took years of developing our top leaders and trusting them and trying and failing and getting better and rebuilding trust when things go wrong. And now together, years later, we're doing something that is God-honoring and incredibly special.

00:19:22 Speaker_00
And that is what I want for you. And that's why I'm going to work harder than you can imagine to bring you content that helps you grow in your leadership. That is what I want for you. But more importantly, I believe that's what God wants for you.

00:19:35 Speaker_00
And as you likely know, unless it's your first time, I'm a pastor. I'm a follower of Christ. And for the purpose of this podcast, I'm not preaching sermons. I am teaching leadership. And I know that our audience is broad.

00:19:47 Speaker_00
We've got people from all different faith backgrounds, some with a lot of faith, some with like no faith. I'm just honored that you're here.

00:19:53 Speaker_00
And so I don't want this to be preachy, but I just want to say and acknowledge because I am a follower of Jesus, to me, it's pretty dang cool that at the end of his ministry, Jesus gave his disciples an assignment.

00:20:04 Speaker_00
He said, go into all the world, preach the gospel, make disciples, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

00:20:10 Speaker_00
And it was really special to me that Jesus was clear about what he wanted his followers to do, but he didn't tell them how to do it. He was clear about the what, but he trusted them or he trusted us with the how. This is true empowerment. I love this.

00:20:28 Speaker_00
I mean, if you look at Jesus through a leadership lens, what did he do? He taught his disciples the kingdom values. He told them to be great, you actually serve others. And then he modeled it.

00:20:40 Speaker_00
He said, there is no greater love than a man lays down his life for his friends. And that's what he did. Jesus demonstrated his love when he gave his life on a cross and he invites us to do the same thing. This is so special to me. Like God trusts me.

00:20:56 Speaker_00
God trusts you. And it's not just to lead your church or lead your business or lead your nonprofit, but he trusts you to lead the people that he loves.

00:21:06 Speaker_00
And one of the greatest acts of love is to trust them, to empower them, to believe in them, to help them get better. Because we know that everyone wins when the leader gets better. I want to say a sincere thank you to being part of our community.

00:21:21 Speaker_00
Would you invite others to be a part? Share on social media. It means the world to me. And in the next episode, on the first Thursday of next month, we're going to do part two

00:21:33 Speaker_00
of this and I'm going to share some emotional and personal thoughts that I hope will connect with you and help you get better. Guess what happened today? You did get a little bit better.

00:21:43 Speaker_00
You're stretching yourself, you're growing, you're investing in yourself. Why? Because you're a great leader. You're a great leader in development, getting better every single day. I thank God for you. I believe in you. You're getting better.

00:21:54 Speaker_00
We know everyone wins when the leader gets better.