Ep 262: Joe Locke AI transcript and summary - episode of podcast Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster
Go to PodExtra AI's episode page (Ep 262: Joe Locke) to play and view complete AI-processed content: summary, mindmap, topics, takeaways, transcript, keywords and highlights.
Go to PodExtra AI's podcast page (Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster) to view the AI-processed content of all episodes of this podcast.
Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster episodes list: view full AI transcripts and summaries of this podcast on the blog
Episode: Ep 262: Joe Locke
Author: Plosive
Duration: 00:55:24
Episode Shownotes
‘Heartstopper’ star Joe Locke has a booking this week. We didn’t actually have any tables available, but then Lisa Fox got in touch and we found room.P.S. Under no circumstances is anyone being sent a signed chopping board. This is a joke by two professional comedians for comedic effect.Joe Locke
stars in 'Agatha All Along' which is available on Disney+ on 18 September in the US and 19 September in the UK. Watch it here.Series 3 of ‘Heartstopper’ is on Netflix on 3 October. Watch it here.Follow Joe on Instagram @joelocke03Recorded and edited by Ben Williams for Plosive.Artwork by Paul Gilbey (photography and design).Follow Off Menu on Twitter and Instagram: @offmenuofficial.And go to our website www.offmenupodcast.co.uk for a list of restaurants recommended on the show.Watch Ed and James's YouTube series 'Just Puddings'. Watch here. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Full Transcript
00:00:00 Speaker_02
Benito, James Acaster here. I forgot to record an advert for my new special, Hitler's Welcome, which is going to be on Sky, NOW TV and HBO Max. It's on all of those, like, right now. I'm very proud of it.
00:00:19 Speaker_02
Can you put this at the beginning of the next episode so that people know the special is out, please? Because I'd like them to know. OK. I hope you're having a good day, Benito. Bye.
00:00:42 Speaker_03
Welcome to the off-menu podcast, taking the batter of conversation, pouring it into the waffle iron of the internet, removing it when it's cooked, and adding the maple syrup of humour.
00:00:51 Speaker_02
We're having waffles for breakfast! That's Ed Gamble, my name is James Acaster, together we own a dream restaurant. Waffle-y versatile. Waffle-y versatile. Is there a little popping sound at the end?
00:01:02 Speaker_02
Together we own a dream restaurant, and every single week we invite the guests and ask them their favourite ever starter main course. Drink, dessert, Side dish. Side dish, not in that order. And this week our guest is Joe Locke.
00:01:15 Speaker_03
Joe Locke is a fantastic actor, famous of course for Heartstopper, a hugely successful popular Netflix show. Massive. Based on some really lovely graphic novels actually by Alice Oseman. I met Alice at the GBM banquet.
00:01:33 Speaker_03
Oh, she was lovely and dealt with a lot of people coming up to her and they saw her doing one sort of bespoke drawing for someone and then she had to do about 90 of them and unfortunately the last thing I had to do was go and get her to do one for my tour manager Paul Brown because he's a huge fan.
00:01:50 Speaker_03
Did she draw Paul Brown? No, quite easy to draw Paul Brown.
00:01:54 Speaker_02
Yeah, tell Paul, if he wants me to draw him, I can do it for him. Lovely looking boy. Yes. Gorgeous. A gorgeous boy. Paul, if you're listening, keep doing you, buddy.
00:02:04 Speaker_03
But we're not here to talk about Paul Brown, we're here to talk about Joe Locke.
00:02:07 Speaker_03
Not only is Heartstopper season 3 coming to Netflix on the 3rd of October, Joe has also bagged himself a part in Agatha All Along, which is very exciting, which is launching in the UK on Disney Plus on September the 19th.
00:02:22 Speaker_03
It is, of course, the spin-off Marvel-Disney series from WandaVision following Katherine Hahn's character, and there's a big reveal at the end of WandaVision.
00:02:31 Speaker_02
Yes. We won't spoil it for people. No. It was Agatha all along. Yeah, yeah. That's a really cool song about it, so you probably saw it on the internet.
00:02:41 Speaker_03
But I'm very excited to watch it. It's the most excited I've been about a Marvel show in a long time, I think.
00:02:46 Speaker_02
Yes, it's very exciting. But listen, if Joe says the secret ingredient, an ingredient which we deem to be unacceptable, we will have to kick him out of the dream restaurant and lock the door behind him.
00:02:54 Speaker_03
Oh, I love it.
00:02:55 Speaker_02
Thank you very much. And this week, the secret ingredient is spring onions.
00:03:00 Speaker_03
Spring onions might come up. You never know.
00:03:03 Speaker_02
Yes.
00:03:04 Speaker_03
It's because his character in Heartstopper is Charlie Spring.
00:03:07 Speaker_02
Yeah, that's why. And look, we did a little bit of a check. In the past, a secret ingredient was spring onion beard. Yes. As in the little bit that comes off of the bottom of a spring onion, a horrible little beard. Yeah.
00:03:19 Speaker_02
But we've not done just full spring onions before. Yeah. So this is a new one. We actually like spring onions just because his character's called Charlie Spring.
00:03:27 Speaker_03
I don't really have them in the house anymore because if you don't use them straight away, the green bit goes all floppy.
00:03:31 Speaker_02
Yeah, it all turns into one big beard. Yeah, it does. Yeah, horrible. ZZ Top. They all turn into ZZ Top, mate. Exactly. No one wants that.
00:03:39 Speaker_03
Apart from, in ZZ Top, of course, there was one member without a beard. His name was Frank Beard.
00:03:45 Speaker_02
It's really good stuff. Yeah. It's like, that's one of those facts that everyone knows, like tomatoes are a fruit, but everyone enjoys hearing it. Yes, exactly. I think maybe, was it Frank? It was something Beard.
00:03:55 Speaker_02
His surname is Beard and he's the one who doesn't have a beard. That's the important bit. Frank Beard. It was Frank Beard. Frank Beard doesn't have a beard. Tomatoes are a fruit.
00:04:03 Speaker_03
And we hope that Joe Locke is a very open guest. I hope he's not locked down. I hope he's quite open and chatty.
00:04:11 Speaker_02
This is the off-menu menu of Joe Locke.
00:04:21 Speaker_03
Welcome, Joe, to the Dream Restaurant. Oh, it's good to be here.
00:04:24 Speaker_04
Welcome, Joe Locke, to the Dream Restaurant. Been expecting you for some time. I've been waiting outside for quite a while. Apologies, actually. That's on us.
00:04:33 Speaker_03
Is that something that you would do for a restaurant? Would you queue to get a table? No.
00:04:38 Speaker_04
I normally would just DM them and then they'd give me a table. Yes, finally.
00:04:42 Speaker_03
Someone using the celebrity status.
00:04:44 Speaker_04
You have to. Sometimes it doesn't work, but it works quite a lot.
00:04:48 Speaker_02
Respect this honesty.
00:04:49 Speaker_04
Oh, I also have this is a I have a fake email that I use as my assistant Which is actually me on a different email and I use that to get like restaurant things because I've realized that if you are Pretending to be official.
00:05:00 Speaker_04
Yeah, there's more of a chance that people would take you seriously Yeah, if it feels like you've got Lisa Fox I wanted a name that was slightly maybe porn star but like still could be a real name and And she got me a free holiday.
00:05:13 Speaker_04
So that was a great one.
00:05:14 Speaker_02
She's a great assistant.
00:05:17 Speaker_03
Lisa Fox is great. You don't have to pay or anything. No, I know.
00:05:20 Speaker_02
It's great. How does Lisa Fox's email manner differ from your own?
00:05:25 Speaker_04
She says the things that I couldn't say. Like, oh, Joe is unable to do that, unfortunately. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, we need, he'll only do one Instagram story or like really harsh. And I'll come in like, oh, thanks so much, Lisa.
00:05:38 Speaker_03
Does Lisa ever say anything about you like, oh Joe can be a bit temperamental?
00:05:42 Speaker_04
No, but maybe I should start doing that.
00:05:44 Speaker_03
Yeah, that's more authentic I think as well. It's been a really hard week with Joe this week. Sorry, Joe's not getting back in contact at the moment. Yeah.
00:05:54 Speaker_02
Are you worried now, though, that people might hear this and be like, well, we know who Lisa Fox is. We're not responding to that. You're going to have to change it up.
00:06:00 Speaker_04
I'll just change her name. Think of another slightly porno name.
00:06:05 Speaker_03
It's not Lisa Fox with three X's, is it? No, but it should be.
00:06:08 Speaker_02
I was going to change it too, but we're not the same person. Last time it was one X. Well, I mean, look, what we're very excited about is, well, there's a number of things actually, but Agatha all along, we're all excited about that.
00:06:20 Speaker_03
Lisa Fox has got you a brain dropper.
00:06:22 Speaker_04
Has Lisa Fox been working hard with this? She's been using that to get me some restaurants, yeah. Did she, like, email Kevin Feige? You know what, she didn't, but she maybe should. Yeah, for the future.
00:06:32 Speaker_02
I think her and Feige should talk, or Feige's assistant, or is it Feige pretending to be someone? Yeah, definitely. Maybe.
00:06:38 Speaker_04
I feel like Feige probably does have an assistant. No, in fact, I know he has an assistant.
00:06:40 Speaker_02
He does? Yeah. Have you met them?
00:06:42 Speaker_04
I have.
00:06:43 Speaker_02
Is it Feige but with his cap off so you can't recognize him?
00:06:45 Speaker_04
I have actually seen Feige without his cap. That's one of my big things in life. I've seen him without his cap on.
00:06:51 Speaker_02
Why did he take it off?
00:06:52 Speaker_04
I don't know. I think maybe because we were at dinner.
00:06:53 Speaker_02
Respect. Gotta be respectful.
00:06:56 Speaker_04
He's got a really nice head.
00:06:58 Speaker_03
Has he?
00:06:58 Speaker_04
Yeah.
00:06:58 Speaker_03
Why does he hide it all the time? Under his cap? I don't know. It's a power play clearly. He takes the cap off for, you know, his most valued cast members. I would hope so. Yeah.
00:07:08 Speaker_02
Let's just say he goes, this is the real me. Did he, did he stare at you really intensely go and say, this is the real major?
00:07:13 Speaker_04
He didn't, he didn't know. I'm going to be really careful because I really would like him to give me more jobs.
00:07:18 Speaker_02
He listens to anything.
00:07:20 Speaker_04
Oh yeah.
00:07:21 Speaker_02
It's like, no spoilers. You might be in trouble now just for revealing that he's got a head. Yeah, everyone will know. Reveal the marble brain. Like he's got a top of the head. Yeah.
00:07:32 Speaker_02
I mean, speaking of spoilers, what can you even tell us about Agatha all along? Nothing?
00:07:36 Speaker_04
I can tell you it's about a show about witches. And my character, I can't tell you anything about, but he's mysterious and that he has a big mystery that holds a lot of the keys to the show, which is great. That's good. That's cool.
00:07:50 Speaker_04
And that's sort of it. We go on this long road and fight things to get power.
00:07:55 Speaker_02
Yeah, look at, I mean, the gymnastics you have to do. Yeah. I don't envy it. I saw it in your eyes. You're like, you're about to say what you fight and you were like, things.
00:08:03 Speaker_04
Things. Yeah. We had our press junket this weekend and it was, it was a long one. And me and Catherine who plays the lead were like sort of helping each other not spoil things. Yeah. There was one time she was like, and then Joe does.
00:08:14 Speaker_04
And I was like, I don't think that's in the trailer. I'm just like, things. He does stuff.
00:08:19 Speaker_03
You're already better than Tom Holland at this.
00:08:22 Speaker_04
Yeah, although I found out all of that was fake. It was all a press thing, like a marketing thing. He like spoiled one thing and then they're like, oh, we're going to run with this.
00:08:31 Speaker_02
It felt like that, you know. After a point, you're like, this is just, they know it's fun and it's funny. So they go, okay, you can say this. Guess what? This will probably have to come out in the edit.
00:08:43 Speaker_02
Because Joe's not allowed to spoil the fact that Tom Holland's spoiling stuff is fake.
00:08:47 Speaker_02
What if Joe's been told he's allowed to go out and they're like, I'll tell you what would be a good news story, is if Joe Locke reveals that Tom Holland's spoiling stuff is fake, and then that'll run, and then people will watch all of the Tom interviews again, all of Joe's interviews, and we'll get loads of press off it.
00:09:06 Speaker_02
Joe could be playing us here. I could be completely playing you. I've been fooled. And you're more sucking at the Marvel team than anyone. Happy to. Had you auditioned for Marvel stuff in the past?
00:09:16 Speaker_04
I hadn't. When they first sent me the audition for this, I didn't have a clue what it was about. Like the first episode, which I can say because in the trailer is like very like, because Agatha's in a spell at the end of WandaVision.
00:09:27 Speaker_04
She's like the true crime bug in our show. So My first scene was a scene from episode one which is set in like a police drama and I was like, what the hell is this? This is not a Marvel series.
00:09:37 Speaker_04
Yeah, because they didn't tell me anything then like as I got more in the process They were like telling me a bit more and a bit more and a bit more
00:09:43 Speaker_02
We've both auditioned for stuff from Marvel stuff before I thought you had oh, no, I think I did I can't remember what it was for that but what's fun is then seeing the thing that comes out Yeah, and spot in the character that you auditioned for played by a megastar played by a megastar Yeah, well, there's no way I was ever gonna get that also like you audition you you got given a completely different scene That wasn't even in it in the first place, but you get to piece it together and go.
00:10:07 Speaker_02
Ah, yeah.
00:10:07 Speaker_01
Yeah.
00:10:08 Speaker_02
It was the part of Are you much of a foodie? Do you like food?
00:10:15 Speaker_04
I do like food. I've been able to eat a lot of nice food because of Lisa Fox.
00:10:20 Speaker_02
What's the best reservation that Lisa Fox has managed to bag you?
00:10:27 Speaker_04
Ooh, this nice restaurant in Capri when I was on holiday a few weeks ago, which I tried and wasn't able to, but Lisa Fox was able to. Wow.
00:10:36 Speaker_02
So you tried it.
00:10:37 Speaker_04
It was the nicest pizza I've ever had in my life.
00:10:38 Speaker_02
They were like, absolutely no way.
00:10:40 Speaker_04
They just read my Instagram messages and didn't reply. But Lisa Fox did Lisa Fox like she found so you just email them on their normal like info out the restaurant's name Does she give in for what does she say?
00:10:52 Speaker_02
Hey, have you seen heartstopper? She you can't say that.
00:10:56 Speaker_04
No, but she like she says who I am Yeah, then in the next email, she'll like go into it But more the reason I do it is because she can say things that I can't yeah, I said that might sound like an asshole Yeah, but she can say it cuz I this is not good enough.
00:11:07 Speaker_04
Well, she's a sassy chick Lisa. Yeah, she is Yeah, she's a history in the industry
00:11:15 Speaker_02
What we all start with is still a spark than water, Joe. Do you have a preference?
00:11:19 Speaker_04
Sparkling. Which, I feel like I'm the only person under 25 who likes sparkling water. But I find water boring. So the sparkling water gives it like, I don't know, some energy. Some fizz.
00:11:30 Speaker_02
Yeah. Well, you know, young people today, you've got a short retention span. Yeah, exactly. So you need the water to be doing something.
00:11:36 Speaker_04
Exactly.
00:11:37 Speaker_02
I need to keep me hooked.
00:11:39 Speaker_03
But you, you were saying that you think you're the only person under 25 who likes sparkling water. I think that. Is it not big with the kids these days? No, man.
00:11:46 Speaker_04
I feel like flavoured sparkling water is. Yeah. Seltzer. Seltzer. Because everyone loves a white claw, but not like normal, like a bottle of San Pellegrino.
00:11:55 Speaker_03
So does it make you feel like older when you drink a sample? I do. I am an old soul in general though.
00:12:00 Speaker_04
So yeah, it feels very fitting.
00:12:02 Speaker_02
Yeah. That's why you're able to pretend to be Lisa Fox. I presume she's over 25.
00:12:05 Speaker_04
Well, yeah, she's in my head. She's like mid thirties and a bit too much filler. Like.
00:12:12 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:12:12 Speaker_04
Now this is what I embody. This is what I am inside really.
00:12:15 Speaker_03
Yeah. That's aspirational. Let's pitch the movie. It's, uh, it's Mrs. Doubtfire for the TikTok generation. You get yourself in a situation where you have to dress up as Lisa Fox.
00:12:25 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:12:25 Speaker_03
So what if that happens? What if they want to meet her?
00:12:28 Speaker_02
You're emailing and they fall in love with Lisa Fox.
00:12:31 Speaker_04
I have had people ask me how she is when I've like, Oh, how's Lisa? It was pretty great to email her. I'm like, Oh, she's great. She's really good. Yeah. You know, she works really hard.
00:12:38 Speaker_02
Bit too much filler again. She'll get the balance right one day. Lisa Fox That's a good film. Yeah, it's a good film. We can pitch it. Well, I think we should I can all get in to get in on this together I think I mean couldn't really fit into the MCU.
00:12:53 Speaker_02
So probably not.
00:12:54 Speaker_04
No, maybe not probably not picture to find you maybe not They've got a lot of different things now.
00:13:00 Speaker_02
Yeah, well, he takes his cap off. Is that like it's not work now like I don't know I feel like You know, you want to impress him was it just you and him
00:13:09 Speaker_04
No, there was a few of us which made it way easier.
00:13:12 Speaker_02
All the Avengers?
00:13:12 Speaker_04
He's a very, very lovely man.
00:13:14 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:13:14 Speaker_04
Oh, I'm not an Avenger, unfortunately.
00:13:15 Speaker_02
Were the Avengers there, though?
00:13:17 Speaker_04
They weren't.
00:13:17 Speaker_02
That was like they were trying to catch you out by saying, you're in the rest of the Avengers, and you were very quick. I'm not an Avenger. Yeah. I wasn't really trying to catch you. Yeah, accidentally. I did this. I've got you.
00:13:28 Speaker_04
You did get me. You really got an Avenger.
00:13:32 Speaker_02
We got him.
00:13:33 Speaker_04
You think you got him? I just got him. This is huge for the pod. People keep asking like, Oh, is your character going to come back? And I'm like, well, obviously I want him to.
00:13:41 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:13:41 Speaker_04
It's a stupid question. Of course I want him to, but I don't know. Yeah. I feel like they're going to catch me out. I'm like, well, I wouldn't say no, obviously.
00:13:48 Speaker_02
Yeah. That's an awful question as well, because it's not like any of them, even if your character died, if, they all come back. No one ever dies in a Marvel show.
00:13:58 Speaker_03
They all come back as a different part.
00:14:00 Speaker_02
Now they've got friggin' Downey Jr. back again, you're like, well, obviously, I don't have to ever get worried if any of them die. That was the biggest death you ever did, and now he's like, six weeks later, alright, how's it going?
00:14:13 Speaker_03
I'm back again, you excited? Takes his mask off like Feige takes his cap off.
00:14:17 Speaker_02
If I get to teach him how to do that. Yeah, you did. Do it like this. This is the dramatic way of doing it. People are going nuts when I take my cap off. So you're going to have San Pellegrino.
00:14:26 Speaker_04
Yeah, that's my brand of choice.
00:14:28 Speaker_02
You want any ice and lemon in there?
00:14:29 Speaker_04
Yeah, loads of lemon. Also, maybe some lime. I prefer a lime than a lemon.
00:14:33 Speaker_02
Good on you. I prefer... Let's rank the citrus fruits.
00:14:37 Speaker_04
Lime, grapefruit, lemon, orange.
00:14:41 Speaker_02
I'd say that's correct.
00:14:42 Speaker_04
Are we just sticking to those four?
00:14:44 Speaker_02
The big hitters? What are you chucking in?
00:14:46 Speaker_03
Well, I hate to be this guy, but where's the old Yuzu?
00:14:49 Speaker_04
I do like it. Yuzu.
00:14:50 Speaker_03
Yeah. And Yuzu.
00:14:56 Speaker_02
Yeah. Yuzu going in the, if you, if you're ranking it amongst those four, which you did perfectly then immediately the bottom, but only because you know, it's less common. Yeah.
00:15:08 Speaker_04
You know, special occasions doesn't pop up as much as it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But like a focaccia, like an oily focaccia, not a bready focaccia.
00:15:20 Speaker_03
You've just got back from Italy, did you say? You're on holiday. I did. Yeah. So are you, you're in an Italian mindset?
00:15:25 Speaker_04
I'm always in an Italian mindset.
00:15:27 Speaker_03
Oh yeah. Okay. This is good.
00:15:28 Speaker_04
Yeah.
00:15:29 Speaker_03
Yeah. How oily are we talking?
00:15:30 Speaker_04
Like really oily. Like the focaccia needs to like juice when you bite into it. Nice.
00:15:35 Speaker_02
Yeah. That's good. Garlic and rosemary on top. When you say you've always, always been in Italy in your mind and in your heart. Um, when did that start?
00:15:44 Speaker_04
I think my mum only used to be able to make two meals, no offence mum, bolognese and chilli, just bolognese with spices in.
00:15:52 Speaker_03
I was going to say, two dishes is a real, that's a lovely compliment to your mum.
00:15:59 Speaker_04
Like bolognese, chilli or mince. Literally every meal, very northern mum, every meal had mince in. So I think probably then, but then I found real Italian food and that as well. Again, no offence mum. No offence. I mean, I love a bolognese.
00:16:13 Speaker_04
It's one of my favourite. Whenever I go home, I always get her to make it for me.
00:16:17 Speaker_03
That's what you're hoping for when you go home. You're hoping for the bolognese rather than the chilli.
00:16:20 Speaker_04
Because she enjoys when I go home, she'll often say yes to making it. In the same way, like whenever I go home, she'll also do all my laundry and because she just likes having me home.
00:16:28 Speaker_03
Yeah.
00:16:29 Speaker_04
She's just mean of me to take advantage of, but I definitely do.
00:16:33 Speaker_03
Yeah. But you know, the offer's there, right? Exactly. Yeah.
00:16:35 Speaker_02
If the offer isn't there, I know who can get it for you. Email your mum?
00:16:40 Speaker_03
Yeah. Hello, Joe? Joe would like the bolognese when he returns home. I think she'd actually kill me if I did that.
00:16:49 Speaker_02
Still goes out of her way to say who you are at the top. And link to your IMDB and your Insta. Yeah, in case she's forgotten. Yeah, if you do all this clothes then he'll do an Insta tweet. Yeah. Insta tweet. I'm so old.
00:17:01 Speaker_02
Are you having anything to dip it in or should it be oily enough for the catcher that he doesn't need it?
00:17:07 Speaker_04
balsamic. I love a vinegary, anything with vinegary, but like olive oil and balsamic, not a sweet balsamic, like a really.
00:17:13 Speaker_02
Yeah. I'm with you. I don't like when it's too sweet. Um, it actually, I get annoyed that I was given it when it's thick and sweet.
00:17:21 Speaker_03
It's like, yeah, no, it's almost a glaze. Yeah.
00:17:25 Speaker_02
My, my, my, my partner got the glaze during lockdown, ordered it. She absolutely loved it. She was like, have you tried this? I was like, yeah, it's disgusting. And it's the worst thing that's happened to me during lockdown. I can't believe you did it.
00:17:37 Speaker_02
I can't believe you got the balsamic glaze. Let's get into your menu proper. Okay. Your dream starter.
00:17:44 Speaker_04
I had this for the first time a few months ago and I've probably ordered it every week. It's the Pao Bhaji from Dishoom. It's like, I think it's like blended vegetables and spices and then give you some bread to dip it in.
00:17:54 Speaker_04
I don't know what is in the mix, but it is the most delicious thing ever. And I luckily live in the Dishoom delivery radius, which is one of my biggest brags in life. So I at least once a week will order it. Just that.
00:18:07 Speaker_02
And listen, to any crazed Joe Locke fans listening to this, there's a number of Deschumes and a number of radii, so you're not going to be able to figure it out from that.
00:18:16 Speaker_03
Also, I think Deschumes do dark kitchens now as well, so it could be anywhere.
00:18:22 Speaker_02
It could be anywhere, so just don't even bother. trying to figure that out that yeah I mean that's great when you when you realise like you're in the radius of one of your faves.
00:18:31 Speaker_04
I was in New York for a while at the start of the year and lots of my cast mates were like one of they all kept like going on trips and then going to London like oh I'm gonna go to Dishoom and I was like well I live within the Dishoom radius.
00:18:42 Speaker_04
They love Dishoom, Americans absolutely go bananas for it. They love the queuing aspect and all the like the whole experience.
00:18:48 Speaker_03
Which of course you don't have to deal with.
00:18:49 Speaker_04
You know what at Dishoom I all have never not queued Really? Yeah. Are they not? Are they completely immune to Lisa's chai? I just, I quite enjoy like the chai when you're queuing outside.
00:19:02 Speaker_03
Yeah. The whole experience. Okay. So for Dishoom your queue. Yeah. I mean, I love Dishoom, but the queue, I'm not, I'm not dealing with it. That's why I get delivered. 25 minutes in Deliveroo. Narrowing it down now. Yeah.
00:19:17 Speaker_02
Is there any castmates who you've like, you know, you bonded over going for meals, going for good food?
00:19:33 Speaker_04
I will. Yeah. I mean, I was in Atlanta for a long time last year and they have, weirdly have really good food in Atlanta, which you wouldn't expect.
00:19:39 Speaker_04
No offense to Atlanta, but well, full offense, but it's a really foodie city and, um, I would, we'd go for a lot of meals with our castmates, which is fun. Because then also if you go with marble, then you never pay.
00:19:52 Speaker_04
You can go to really nice restaurants and just eat what you want. Yeah, I will have the main on the side and two glasses of champagne. Thanks.
00:20:00 Speaker_02
Is that why Feige takes his cap off because he's got his wallet under there? Yeah. That's all the money. That's actually it. He takes it off and all the money just falls off.
00:20:06 Speaker_04
He does.
00:20:06 Speaker_02
It's all loose change and notes. It just cascades down onto his shoulders. The waiter has to pick it off of his head.
00:20:13 Speaker_04
It's just a really heavy Amex.
00:20:14 Speaker_02
It's so heavy. There's Mickey ears under there now. Yeah, there he is. Surgically attached. Can't remove him. They got him.
00:20:24 Speaker_04
I went to Disneyland a lot at the weekend in California, which was really fun. And they're like, I asked them, because we're going to be in Anaheim for the week, I said, oh, can we go? And they're like, oh, be really busy because it's D23.
00:20:33 Speaker_04
I said, well, I don't expect a queue. You're going to be taking me. But it was very, very fun.
00:20:40 Speaker_03
Did you skip lines and stuff? Yeah, we got you a free little escort.
00:20:43 Speaker_04
Which is great. It's a real power trip.
00:20:46 Speaker_03
That's the dream. That's your dream.
00:20:47 Speaker_02
Yeah being shown shine around Disney and skipping all the cues I would love especially if you I mean obviously my head you've been shown around by one of the characters Yeah, it was Mickey.
00:20:56 Speaker_02
Yeah It's fine he under there Actually, yeah, that's the twist.
00:21:03 Speaker_03
Yes Mickey Mouse if you were being escorted around Disney by one of the characters Which character would you most like to escort you around Disney? Yeah, I
00:21:11 Speaker_04
Goofy yeah, yeah, I don't know cuz he's goofy.
00:21:14 Speaker_03
He is goofy, but I don't trust his organization skills Yeah, he's gonna get you killed man.
00:21:18 Speaker_04
Yeah, you're like just fine. Don't put the seatbelt on.
00:21:22 Speaker_02
Yeah Yeah, you don't you don't want to be show around by goof.
00:21:24 Speaker_04
No, maybe not.
00:21:25 Speaker_02
I think Minnie would be responsible. She would Daisy yeah, and she's used to dealing with me. She hates her husband
00:21:32 Speaker_04
Yeah, they all seem to just have dysfunctional marriages.
00:21:35 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:21:36 Speaker_03
Well, because they're all clearly related to each other. That's true.
00:21:38 Speaker_02
Yeah, it's not ideal.
00:21:41 Speaker_03
Daisy Duck is Donald Duck with eyelashes. They're related.
00:21:45 Speaker_02
You're gonna get in trouble for that, man. I'm not. You're gonna get in deep trouble. I don't work for Disney. Not with that eye. You're never working for Disney. Oh shit.
00:21:54 Speaker_04
I used to have a bus driver that used to do a really good Donald Duck impression.
00:22:01 Speaker_02
Related at what point would he do the impression?
00:22:04 Speaker_04
How would he how do you like when you're getting on the bus?
00:22:06 Speaker_02
Yeah, I'd be like can I have a child ticket to town please and he'd be like I just can't do the impression Yeah, but he would say yes of the Donald Duck for you like yeah, that's 70p or something Yeah, and then would you still want to get on the bus after that?
00:22:18 Speaker_04
Yeah, I mean in the Isle of Man. There's not much choice. It's gotten the bus or walk for two hours Yeah, you have to get on the Donald Duck bus I remember when I was like younger being fun, but then I was like 13 and he was still doing it.
00:22:29 Speaker_02
Yeah, get a new impression, man. Yeah. You've had a long time to work on a new impression. And this isn't fun for us all. We're all on the Isle of Man.
00:22:38 Speaker_04
Yeah. I'm the loudspeaker, like.
00:22:39 Speaker_02
Yeah. Are your dream main course?
00:22:50 Speaker_04
There's a restaurant in New York called Don Angie and it's like Italian-American and they do these lasagna rolls. It's like a big dish. I don't know why they decided to make them rolls, but it's the nicest thing I've ever eaten in my life.
00:23:02 Speaker_04
I said that about the pav bhaji, but I still mean it. It's the nicest meal I've ever had in my life. And that was a Lisa Fox reservation.
00:23:13 Speaker_02
Oh, yes. Well done, Lisa. Joe will only eat lasagna if it's in rolls. If we see it stacked like a normal lasagna, you are in big trouble.
00:23:25 Speaker_04
Only in rolls. So as in the past, everything's rolled up. It's like rolled and then they slice it.
00:23:33 Speaker_02
Like a Swiss roll that's cut up and put in a dish. Like an M&S wrap.
00:23:37 Speaker_04
Yeah, but like loads of little M&S wraps in the dish.
00:23:40 Speaker_02
I think Swiss Roll covered it, analogy-wise. Well, Joe said that like they cut it diagonally at the top. Yeah, they do. Oh, it's diagonal. And for me, that's like a M&S wrap.
00:23:49 Speaker_02
An M&S wrap, or even a Sainsbury's or Tesco wrap, you know, they tend to do it diagonal cut at the top.
00:23:55 Speaker_03
There's something about the diagonal cut that makes everything seem more fancy. It is. Because sometimes I'll do that at home with a steak. Wow.
00:24:02 Speaker_03
And you feel like, well yeah, you let it rest and then you just, when you're cutting it, just go in diagonally and then put it on a plate and then for presentation just sort of fan it out.
00:24:12 Speaker_02
And I'll do that at home, alone. He does it at home alone and he pretends the steak's his wife and he talks to it.
00:24:18 Speaker_03
Yeah, I also have a wife. Steak was my runner up, my main, but the lasagna took it. The lasagna rolls sound great.
00:24:24 Speaker_04
So they then putting them in the dish and then sort of putting more stuff on top Yeah, like more cheese and more sauce and yeah, yeah, they used to have a Michelin star, but they lost it But oh no, I don't know why because their food's amazing.
00:24:35 Speaker_04
That's weird I wonder what they're trying to get the star back with the diagonal cut Well, this is why I was like probably a good time to go because they just lost the stars They'll be trying to get it back.
00:24:43 Speaker_02
Yeah, perfect. So the fucking hard to Lisa Fox say that in her email If you want that star back, how about you let a star come and eat in your restaurant?
00:24:51 Speaker_03
Well, I have a star for you.
00:24:53 Speaker_02
Yeah, I'd be so tempted. You're very restrained with Lisa Fox. If it was me, and I was pretending to be my own assistant, I would go absolutely hog-wild with stuff that I said about myself in emails.
00:25:04 Speaker_04
My friends and family keep being like, can I use her email so that I can get, when we're on holiday, I'm like, no, you know, if I expand Lisa Fox to more than just me, then who knows what she'll do.
00:25:13 Speaker_03
Yeah. But also, here's the thing. I think Lisa Fox works for you because you're you and you're an actor and you're on TV shows.
00:25:21 Speaker_04
Yeah, but then use it on my name and then I just won't turn up.
00:25:24 Speaker_02
Sure. Yeah, you can't do that. Or even if they're just saying like, Hey, it's Lisa Fox. I represent Joe Locke. Could his mum come and have a meal soon? I mean, that's going to start. Then it's like, oh, this Joe Locke guy.
00:25:40 Speaker_02
He just tries to get meals for his family.
00:25:43 Speaker_03
Surely one day you're going to have a natural assistant. I mean, hopefully. There's going to be a horrible moment where you're going to have to fire your fake assistant. Oh, no.
00:25:50 Speaker_03
Will you send out an email from Lisa Fox to everyone saying, oh, I'm leaving the current position, but here's my replacement if you need anything?
00:25:57 Speaker_04
Maybe I will. Just, like, use the same email and just... Yeah.
00:26:01 Speaker_03
Yeah. Or whoever you hire, you have to say, by the way, your name's Lisa Fox now.
00:26:05 Speaker_02
Yeah. No, no. I think Lisa Fox has to send out an email letting all the people know it's with a heavy heart.
00:26:12 Speaker_04
The condolences roll in.
00:26:13 Speaker_02
Yeah. That I am terminating my employment with Joe Locke. It's been 15 glorious years.
00:26:19 Speaker_04
I just can't handle it anymore.
00:26:23 Speaker_03
Yeah. I really respect this strategy of booking restaurants though, not just the Lisa Fox.
00:26:26 Speaker_04
I mean, if I can get a reservation on my own, I'll just get a reservation.
00:26:29 Speaker_02
Sure.
00:26:30 Speaker_04
Yes, but Lucifox is plan B. Lucifox is there if it doesn't because restaurants always have tables. Yeah, they always do. They're saving them.
00:26:38 Speaker_02
That's a secret that you learn the deeper you get into this biz. Hold on a second, restaurants have always got tables. Are you shitting me? Yeah, someone tells you. Every performance, every theatre has seats. They're all there. None of it's sold out.
00:26:54 Speaker_02
We'll get you in.
00:26:56 Speaker_04
I'm going to the Fringe tomorrow and I wanted to get tickets for a show. So I emailed them and they were like, no, we're really sold out. And I was like, actually sold out? Like really? And they're like, yeah. I was like, all right. Never have to.
00:27:09 Speaker_02
Maybe you had to go industrial on that. The next day it's like, My name is Sam Buttersby. I am Joe Lug's lawyer. You better free up those seats or we're gonna take you to court. Yeah, maybe I will tomorrow. Get Sam Buttersby off the bench, the lawyer.
00:27:22 Speaker_04
Have you got a lawyer in real life? I do have a lawyer.
00:27:25 Speaker_02
Well, not anymore.
00:27:26 Speaker_04
Wow.
00:27:26 Speaker_02
You got Sam Buttersby.
00:27:29 Speaker_04
Sam will have to fight with my lawyer because she's, she's great. Yeah. I wouldn't want to, I wouldn't, I wouldn't want to be at the end of.
00:27:35 Speaker_03
No? Yeah. Oh dear. Perfect filler as well.
00:27:46 Speaker_02
Your dream side dish, Joe?
00:27:48 Speaker_04
I've really thought about this one. I've gone with on the same lines of having with the lasagna and not just my like, because if it wasn't, I just have like really vinegary chippy chips. That would be my but they wouldn't go with the lasagna.
00:27:59 Speaker_04
So I've gone with like really garlicky citrusy broccolini, like the long ones. Yeah, really like so garlicky and citrusy that it hurts when you eat them.
00:28:07 Speaker_02
You won't be in pain.
00:28:09 Speaker_04
Yeah, I want like three whole limes or lemons like just to squeeze on top Yeah, we can provide you with the whole you know all the citrus is ranked. Yeah, okay?
00:28:18 Speaker_02
Just like if I can and you can just do all yeah, you can just go for it You know are you gonna put grapefruit on your broccolini though?
00:28:24 Speaker_03
Maybe not. Maybe not, but it'll be there just in case.
00:28:26 Speaker_02
You never know. Yeah, you never know what sort of mood you're going to be in. That's just because people haven't started doing that yet.
00:28:31 Speaker_02
Maybe if a restaurant started doing grapefruit on the broccolini, everyone would be like, actually, that's awesome and copy it.
00:28:36 Speaker_04
There was, at this Don Angie restaurant, they did a chrysanthemum salad of like chrysanthemum leaves from the flower, which was weird, but delicious.
00:28:44 Speaker_03
Sounds like a great plan. Yeah, this does sound good. I'm just disappointed to hear it's lost its star.
00:28:48 Speaker_04
Hopefully they get it back. Hopefully this will help them.
00:28:51 Speaker_03
We are very much part of the decision process with the Michelin. Yes, in the Michelin organisation. Yeah, we basically decide.
00:28:57 Speaker_02
That's gonna be strange for that restaurant. Yeah, we lost a Michelin star, but then we got it back where we were mentioned on a podcast that discusses incest amongst the Disney characters. Yes! We're very grateful to them.
00:29:11 Speaker_03
Are you such a foodie that you look for the Michelin-style places and you're like, I'd like to tick that off, I'd like to go to that place?
00:29:16 Speaker_04
You know, I went through a period where I was like, oh, I want to try and go to loads of Michelin-style restaurants, and I've realised that I just don't have the palate for it.
00:29:23 Speaker_03
Right.
00:29:24 Speaker_04
Like, I was in Brazil, and me and my friend Kit were there for press, and Netflix had booked us this really nice restaurant. It was one of the best in the world. Like, 15-course tasting menu.
00:29:33 Speaker_04
And then it got to the dessert, and the food was like, it was fine. It got to the dessert, and it was like, what we thought was this chocolate thing with this white chocolate sauce. It wasn't, it was gorgonzola sauce.
00:29:43 Speaker_04
I mean, you took a big bite of it, and the chef was looking directly at me as I was eating it, and I was like vomiting in my mouth, because it was the most strong, like, disgusting.
00:29:52 Speaker_03
Also a surprise, right?
00:29:54 Speaker_04
Yeah, I was expecting some really nice white chocolate at the end of this, like, long, posh meal of, like, once caused this of, like, ants.
00:30:01 Speaker_03
Yeah. So, yeah. How were you with the ants?
00:30:03 Speaker_04
The ant was fine. It tasted like lemons, because it was eating lemongrass, which is great.
00:30:08 Speaker_03
So where are you ranking ants in the citrus?
00:30:11 Speaker_04
Um, above Yuzu, below.
00:30:13 Speaker_03
Wow, above Yuzu. Poor Yuzu. That's a bad day for Yuzu. Poor Yuzu. There is that thing though, if you're expecting one thing and it turns out to be another thing, it's almost more disgusting than you.
00:30:22 Speaker_04
I was trying to like tell the others at the table, like, don't, don't do it.
00:30:25 Speaker_04
And they were like, but I had it in my mouth and I was trying to, and I was like looking at them and they were both doing it at the same time and us, we were feeling the same things. As the chef was like staring at us like, yeah, good.
00:30:35 Speaker_02
You got your mouth full as they're going, I love white chocolate! Down the hatch! You're trying to communicate it with them.
00:30:42 Speaker_01
White chocolate, here I come!
00:30:46 Speaker_02
Two tickets to Choctaw, please!
00:30:48 Speaker_03
Trying to swallow it was horrible. What are the Brazilian fans like? Because all I ever hear from people who are in shows that are big in Brazil, they go out there and it's like madness.
00:30:57 Speaker_04
Brazil is, being in Brazil was the only time in my life I've ever felt famous. Yeah. Like we had like a car and security and we're like, some are people outside of a restaurant we go to. Wow. I don't know, they have a very fan culture there.
00:31:08 Speaker_04
I'm not sure I could deal with that every day. No. But it's nice to know people like at work, I guess.
00:31:14 Speaker_03
So not only was the chef staring at you, there were people at the window just staring at you, eating the gorgonzola.
00:31:20 Speaker_02
Everyone looking at you, he thinks that's white chocolate. We got him with the classic trick. He's falling for it again. Where are you from up north? The Isle of Man. So, sort of up north. No, that's not up north. That's an island.
00:31:34 Speaker_04
Yeah, but, yeah, you're right.
00:31:35 Speaker_02
Yeah, no, I'm not right.
00:31:36 Speaker_04
It's easier to describe as up north.
00:31:37 Speaker_02
Yeah, I'm not right. You are, because you're from there. But, when you say about Michelin star places, so, my girlfriend's from Manchester, and rightly gets very annoyed that places, often places in London, get Michelin stars a lot quicker.
00:31:51 Speaker_04
Yeah.
00:31:52 Speaker_02
than places outside of London, especially places up north.
00:31:55 Speaker_02
And like, I wondered if you, you find that as well when you're like trying this Michelin star food and I was thinking... There's nowhere on the Isle of Man that deserves a Michelin star, no offence. Again, full offence.
00:32:05 Speaker_02
I mean, every time you say no offence, you really have fully slammed an entire place.
00:32:10 Speaker_04
There's some great food in the Isle of Man, but not good enough to get a Michelin star.
00:32:13 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:32:14 Speaker_04
Maybe I've just not been to them. There's a lot of fish and I'm not a big fish fan.
00:32:18 Speaker_02
Right, there's a lot of fish places on the Isle of Man.
00:32:20 Speaker_03
Yeah, you'd hope so as well. You would.
00:32:22 Speaker_02
Yeah, I mean, they're surrounded.
00:32:24 Speaker_03
Yeah. I think they should give a Michelin star to the bus driver for the impression.
00:32:28 Speaker_02
Yeah. Michelin should start doing that. Just awarding things that aren't food, but that they think are cool. And going, that gets a Michelin star. And so it's on the bus, and it says Michelin, and they're like, what's that for?
00:32:39 Speaker_02
And he'll be like, what do you think it's for? Well, that's deserved. Really sad that one year he loses a stuff.
00:32:47 Speaker_04
Yeah. Yeah. His impressions are not good enough.
00:32:50 Speaker_02
He let it drop. He did. He started and then he's got to try and get it back. He starts like wearing no bottoms to be more like Donald Duck. Gets fired from the bus. I was really confused there.
00:33:01 Speaker_03
That'd be more like Donald. Yeah. Be more like most bus drivers. Yeah. If you're a bus driver, I don't think I'd wear trousers for most of the day. No one can see, right? Can't they? No. When have you looked down at a bus driver's crotch?
00:33:12 Speaker_02
All the time, I always check. That's the rule, always check. Always check when you go on a bus station, that they're not Donald Duck in it. Or Winnie the Pooh in it. Yeah, Winnie the Pooh's the main culprit.
00:33:24 Speaker_02
Is he the main person you think of when you think of someone wearing no trousers or pants? Is Winnie the Pooh? You know what, he is.
00:33:29 Speaker_04
I saw someone walking past Kings Cross yesterday with no shoes and no trousers on. But he looked like a, he had like a shirt on, so he seemed quite, he was on the phone. He seemed very... Hot day. Normal. It was a warm day.
00:33:41 Speaker_04
It wasn't like shorts though, they were very clearly just...
00:33:44 Speaker_02
Underwear, but shirt and tie on his mobile phone pair of calvins.
00:33:48 Speaker_02
I saw the Olympians at King's Cross the other day Oh drop my friend off at the train station, and they were all getting off the Eurostar And they're wearing their medals Joe good for them.
00:33:56 Speaker_04
I mean I would yeah, I wouldn't actually wouldn't yeah I don't know if everyone if all the other one else was then yeah, yeah, don't know if you ever gonna do it again I just would never win a medal
00:34:06 Speaker_02
Oh, come on, mate. Yeah, you would. Come on. You might win an Oscar or something one day. Hopefully. Are you telling me you're not going to land in Heathrow holding the Oscar?
00:34:13 Speaker_04
But then no one else will have won one, so I wouldn't have anyone else to do it with. Depends who you fly home with. That's true.
00:34:17 Speaker_02
You could say to all the Oscar winners, do you want to come back to the Isle of Man? Come back to the Isle of Man for a party. And then as you get on the plane, you just turn and go, everyone hold your Oscars. Everyone hold your Oscars.
00:34:27 Speaker_02
Get them on your backpacks. That'd be great. I mean, you would put it in your hand luggage.
00:34:30 Speaker_03
I wouldn't trust it in the hold. No, I'd hold on to it for the whole thing. It wouldn't even go in the hand luggage. Just keep gripping on to it for dear life.
00:34:38 Speaker_03
On the Isle of Man, what's the vibe like on the Isle of Man with you now being successful in Hollywood, etc? Is it, we're so proud of Joe, or is it, here he comes, Billy Big Bollocks? Here he comes, Billy Big Bollocks.
00:34:51 Speaker_04
People don't give a shit, which is great, but then it's almost so the opposite that it's almost embarrassing.
00:34:58 Speaker_04
Getting recognised in the Isle of Man is just the worst thing, because it's not like, oh, here's this actor, I know his stuff, it's, oh, here he comes, thinks he's all high and mighty now.
00:35:07 Speaker_02
Yeah, even though we're currently saying that on the Isle of Man, which he's returned to and is still visiting. Yeah. And seeing people, so he clearly doesn't think he's too good for us. Yeah. Because he's literally here.
00:35:16 Speaker_04
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm really glad I've left, but like, I love going back. I feel like I've got a new appreciation for it now. Now you've been nice places. Yeah. Yeah. Now I can, you know, go for two days and then leave.
00:35:27 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:35:28 Speaker_04
I enjoy it way more.
00:35:34 Speaker_02
Your dream drink?
00:35:37 Speaker_04
Aperol Spritz. I think it's just like the classic Italian. I'm going for the Italian main course. It's just my favourite. I could drink it like juice. I do drink it like juice.
00:35:47 Speaker_01
Oh yeah?
00:35:48 Speaker_04
In the summer.
00:35:49 Speaker_03
So it's the... That's Campari. Aperol. Aperol. Same thing. Is that a different... Aperol.
00:35:55 Speaker_04
Campari is more like bitter. Campari is actually orange, whereas Aperol looks orange but isn't orange.
00:36:01 Speaker_02
So this is actually a big moment. I've not... Ed is the one who knows stuff on the podcast. Yeah, very rare does he get picked up on stuff, and he's got it wrong You've already established that you're under 25.
00:36:11 Speaker_02
I'm not gonna ask what your exact age is, but you just fucking destroyed him
00:36:15 Speaker_03
Sorry, Ed.
00:36:16 Speaker_02
I don't feel destroyed. I feel educated.
00:36:19 Speaker_03
I also feel thick because it's called Naparospirits.
00:36:23 Speaker_02
Yeah, so like really, really did you on that one. So Campari, that was you straight out the gate, real confident.
00:36:29 Speaker_03
But that's another big red Italian drink, right?
00:36:32 Speaker_02
That's like me when I said tweet and Instagram earlier.
00:36:37 Speaker_04
Prosecco? Prosecco. Yes. And soda. I know people who make it without the soda and they're like, oh, it's way better. And I was like, no, otherwise it's not spritz. Yeah. You need to have the soda. Also, then you can make it a much bigger drink. Yeah.
00:36:48 Speaker_04
And you can like, if it's just Prosecco and apple, you can't like, glug it. Yeah. I want to be able to like, have three in half an hour. Yeah. If you're right.
00:36:57 Speaker_02
Be acceptable. Yeah. You got, you got to glug the spritz. Yeah. Are you, are you quite a burpy boy after that?
00:37:03 Speaker_04
I'm quite a buppy boy anyway.
00:37:04 Speaker_02
Yeah?
00:37:04 Speaker_04
Yeah. I prefer it being coming up this way than being a farty boy.
00:37:08 Speaker_02
Yeah. We recorded an episode earlier today and I farted during it, Joe.
00:37:12 Speaker_04
Sometimes you can't help it.
00:37:13 Speaker_02
I'll open it up and tell you that.
00:37:15 Speaker_03
I mean, it's quite a small room too. It is. It's a small room. There's no real airflow in here. So yeah, it was unpleasant.
00:37:21 Speaker_02
It was a guess that I knew anyway. That's good though, at least it... If it was, you know, if I'd done it during this episode, I'd just jump out the window.
00:37:27 Speaker_04
You know, it would break the ice maybe if you did it at the start.
00:37:29 Speaker_02
No, no. If I'd done it in front of you, Joe, you'd never see me again.
00:37:32 Speaker_04
I did feel like, you know, you felt comfortable enough to fart in front of me. You know, it's a nice thing. Sometimes though, when you're like really clenching it and you just can't hold it anymore.
00:37:41 Speaker_02
Yeah. Well, exactly. I mean, I didn't even do that last time. I just let it go. Yeah. Didn't even let it go. Just didn't even know it was going to happen until it happened. I'm 39 now. I shouted too loud and that was it.
00:37:54 Speaker_03
It was when he was saying poppadums or bread. Right. He shouted and a fart came out.
00:37:58 Speaker_02
Yeah. No one heard it, I had to tell them it happened. But I just thought, you know, better be honest.
00:38:03 Speaker_04
Did it smell or did you get away with it?
00:38:05 Speaker_02
I don't think it did. I don't think it was a smelly one.
00:38:08 Speaker_04
So you really could have got away with it?
00:38:09 Speaker_02
Yes, I have absolutely completely got away with it. But I thought, you know, this is the first of the podcast, we've been recording these since 2018. I should let them all know that it's finally happened and I've passed wind on the pod.
00:38:20 Speaker_04
Yeah, it's a long time to not let it happen. Yeah, you've done well actually.
00:38:25 Speaker_02
Yeah, we should have a thing on the wall that says, this many days without a fart. We've got to put it back to zero now.
00:38:33 Speaker_03
When you meet someone for the first time, when do you feel relaxed enough to fart or burp in front of them?
00:38:39 Speaker_02
Sorry that it's come to this, Joe. I know, it really depends. I feel like there's a part of me that wants to do it quite early to break the ice, you know?
00:38:47 Speaker_04
But it depends who it is. I'm not going to fart in front of Kevin Feige. Of course not.
00:38:51 Speaker_02
If the hat's off, I think.
00:38:52 Speaker_03
Well, the danger is if you fart and blow his hat off.
00:38:54 Speaker_02
That would just... You'll blow off my hat! You little punk kid! You'll never work in this town again!
00:39:01 Speaker_04
But obviously like when you're doing like a long series, I mean within two weeks you get so on you're spilling you see each other at your worst Yeah, you never done it on camera by mistake. Oh many times.
00:39:11 Speaker_02
Oh, yeah.
00:39:12 Speaker_04
Yeah this and host of her in the last season mean kit We're filming our first ever sex scene and he fired during the first episode
00:39:19 Speaker_04
which is really great because it like broke like it's such an awkward thing doing a sex scene but like it was like mid kiss and i just heard him fart and i just never i think like they got it and they recorded it i really hope they make some blooper reel because it just like broke the ice completely yeah of like the awkwardness of
00:39:36 Speaker_04
So that was a great fart. Yeah, that was a wonderful fart. I don't know, it wasn't me who actually farted, so I just told his story. Sorry, Kate.
00:39:43 Speaker_03
James tried to make the pun fartstopper there, but... It's a good one.
00:39:47 Speaker_04
That's what we call it in our cast group chat. We call it much worse than fartstopper, but I won't repeat them on this. Add me to the group chat.
00:39:54 Speaker_02
That'll be fun if out of nowhere, it's all the cast of Heartstopper and me, and me for no reason. And I keep calling it Fartstopper.
00:40:03 Speaker_03
And just say, James Acas has been added to the group.
00:40:07 Speaker_04
Just Fartstopper.
00:40:09 Speaker_03
And then put it on the pooper reel.
00:40:11 Speaker_02
That's a good one. Put on the pooper reel and then I'll do like the devil horns hands emoji, and I'll just wait. I just look at it until someone replies.
00:40:22 Speaker_04
I wonder what they reply.
00:40:23 Speaker_02
I imagine I get ignored for the whole thing.
00:40:25 Speaker_03
Who do you think would leave the group first if James kept posting?
00:40:29 Speaker_02
It's always stuff like that. I'm never like changing it up.
00:40:31 Speaker_04
I'll answer who I think would reply first. Toby would reply first and he would love it.
00:40:37 Speaker_02
Great. That's good. I'm in with Toby straight away. Every now and again, I think I would I don't need to if someone was opening up about something serious I would write and I'd only ever write we're all here for you So I would do that.
00:40:49 Speaker_02
I would say we're all here for you or I'd make puns about farts Those are my only two gears.
00:40:54 Speaker_04
Yeah, I think I mean, it's not a very serious group chat.
00:40:56 Speaker_02
So I think yeah If I ever get serious I have that, I have that gear that I can shift into we're all here for you But I'm not allowed to say it twice in a row.
00:41:07 Speaker_01
Yeah
00:41:11 Speaker_02
We arrive at your dream dessert. It's very exciting. I'm a sweet tooth boy, so dessert's my favourite course. And I know that you were hoping something was going to be white chocolate and were so annoyed it was cheese.
00:41:22 Speaker_02
So I know that you're on team sweet too.
00:41:24 Speaker_04
I am, I am. I love cakes. My dessert would be a tiramisu. Love a tiramisu. Almost all Italian. I told you I'm Italian.
00:41:33 Speaker_03
You stuck to your promise.
00:41:35 Speaker_04
I also love a churro. But that's not really, I feel like that's like a post dessert.
00:41:39 Speaker_02
I had some really good gigs in Truro on my last tour in Cornwall. Where's the best tiramisu you've ever had?
00:41:44 Speaker_03
Oh, you know what? I love the M&S tiramisu. Wow. After talking about being on the Amalfi coast and going to all these fancy restaurants.
00:41:52 Speaker_02
Mediterranean and Sardinia.
00:41:53 Speaker_03
Yeah. That was very quick.
00:41:57 Speaker_02
That is that that's demeaning isn't it when one comedian says to another that was very quick Congratulatory time man, but thank you the one that comes in like the big the big tub tray one Yeah, the tray the whole tray. Oh, yeah.
00:42:10 Speaker_02
Yeah, that's good stuff. I'm like, is it really cuz I Don't know if I've had one from M&S. Is it really creamy?
00:42:17 Speaker_04
It's quite creamy and it's very coffee as well. Coffee.
00:42:21 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:42:21 Speaker_04
Yeah.
00:42:21 Speaker_03
I'd say coffee.
00:42:22 Speaker_04
Yeah.
00:42:23 Speaker_02
Yeah. You want to really. Yeah. I mean, it depends what like different. I found that more and more with tiramisu, the creamier it is, the more I go nuts for it. But then other people value it.
00:42:34 Speaker_04
So I just regret it later. I guess also on my starter, it'd be too lactate just to take right at the start.
00:42:39 Speaker_03
Oh yeah, absolutely. I mean look, you're in the dream restaurant, so lactose intolerance doesn't exist. Yeah, if you want the genie to take away your lactose intolerance, that would be great.
00:42:47 Speaker_02
Like John Coffey. Coffee-y. I'm like John Coffey from the Green Mile. I can take it away from him. Right, yeah. Like John Coffey takes people's pain away from them. I can take the lactose intolerance from him. So I'd be coffee-y.
00:43:01 Speaker_03
Have you seen The Green Mile? Yeah. Doesn't he take the pain away and it goes through him?
00:43:04 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:43:04 Speaker_03
So is then he lactose intolerant? Or are you lactose intolerant?
00:43:07 Speaker_02
He'll always then just spill it out of his mouth like this swarm of flies. But I guess when I take it in and absorb it, I will have that temporarily within me and I will have to take that from Joe.
00:43:17 Speaker_04
I'll just give you some lactaid as you always have some with me.
00:43:20 Speaker_03
That's very thoughtful. I know a few lactose intolerant people. Do those pills actually work?
00:43:25 Speaker_04
I don't know if it's like a placebo or something, but most of the time I also just forget. In the moment I'm like, it's fine. And then two hours later, I'm just like crying over the toilet.
00:43:32 Speaker_02
Yeah, if I have a pill and you're like, it's not working, I'm going to take another one.
00:43:36 Speaker_04
Yeah. I mean, it's just, it's just lactase. So I don't think it'll do anything to you.
00:43:39 Speaker_02
Yeah. Careful, man. You never know. You take too many, then you can only eat dairy. Then that's all you can eat. If it isn't dairy, you're in trouble. You have to live on a dairy only diet forever.
00:43:53 Speaker_03
It'd be awful if you became dairy though, wouldn't it?
00:43:55 Speaker_04
Yeah, I wouldn't like that. I don't really like dairy, unlike in things. People who drink milk, I find really weird. It's creepy. A glass of milk. It's creepy.
00:44:03 Speaker_02
It's weird. Unless you're a kid, it's creepy. Are you familiar with the comedian Josh Widdicombe? Yes. He'll buy just a little pint of milk from the shop and drink it on his way home.
00:44:13 Speaker_04
I just, like, grow up. That's what I think to that. Correct. Did you hear that, Josh? Grow up. Sorry.
00:44:19 Speaker_02
Grow up, you loser.
00:44:22 Speaker_04
I also just hate the taste of milk. Like that weird aftertaste you get. And the thought of what it is just creeps me out. But if it's in stuff? If it's in stuff it's fine. I make a mean custard.
00:44:33 Speaker_03
Talk us through the mean custard recipe.
00:44:35 Speaker_04
It's just cream and egg yolks and vanilla and you just whisk it. But it just tastes really nice.
00:44:42 Speaker_02
I've never made my own custard before.
00:44:43 Speaker_04
I mean, to me, this is like... Not for anything, just to have. And then you can make it really thick and... Eat it with a spoon.
00:44:51 Speaker_02
There's loads of people our age or older, I'm talking about mine and Ed's age or older, Who are just going, oh, young people these days. They don't do as much. We used to have proper experiences. We ain't make custard, this guy doesn't make custard.
00:45:04 Speaker_02
So, you know, what are you talking about if you're listening? Is that your signature dish, would you say?
00:45:08 Speaker_03
Or are there other things you can cook?
00:45:09 Speaker_04
My signature dish is a brownie. I can make a really good brownie. Like really fudgy. I'm really specific about brownies. They have to be, not cakey, really fudgy. Almost like raw.
00:45:17 Speaker_02
Mm-hmm. Oh, that's too. I mean also I went for stage I learned to make these brownies and afterwards I dip them in melted chocolate and let them set so they had a That was yeah a good brownie.
00:45:28 Speaker_04
You should never be able to have more than like a little square. Yeah, so rich.
00:45:31 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:45:32 Speaker_04
Yeah Yeah, it should make you feel really sick.
00:45:34 Speaker_03
It should be the same size as the lactase pill.
00:45:35 Speaker_02
Yeah. Yeah There's a place, a new place that's opened up in Hackney called Running Late, which is a coffee place, which I mainly went in for the first time just to congratulate them that they hadn't gone with the pun Running Latte.
00:45:49 Speaker_02
I was like, first of all, I said, I said, first of all, congratulations, I'm not calling this place Running Late. You didn't open with that. I did. Oh my god.
00:45:56 Speaker_02
I said, I said, congratulations on not calling this place Running Latte and they went, thank you. It was, so many people told us to call it Running Latte and we stuck to our guns and called it Running Late.
00:46:05 Speaker_02
And I was like, well you've made the right choice.
00:46:07 Speaker_03
I feel like they've got the ultimate James Acaster experience. First of all, congratulations on not calling this Running Latte.
00:46:15 Speaker_02
But they've got these little brownie bites these salted caramel ones that are layered up So it's like brownie salted caramel brownie, but it is very small like you say They're good. They're they're dangerously good.
00:46:28 Speaker_02
I love a bit of caramel Yeah, they were very nice little like just like perfect amount like each layers the exact same size You got double the brownie to the salted caramel nice.
00:46:39 Speaker_03
You know how everyone's going like salted caramels everywhere. I'm not mad about it. I will never get bored of salted caramel. No, it's great. I'm done with normal caramel now.
00:46:48 Speaker_02
To me that is normal caramel now.
00:46:50 Speaker_04
Yeah, same. I've dumbed down on how much of a sweet tooth I had because I feel like it makes me feel like more of a kid. But I feel like it's more growing up to say you don't have a sweet tooth anymore, but I 100% have a sweet tooth.
00:46:59 Speaker_02
You're talking to two people who have been going on. We like absolutely strong-armed him into a conversation about farts. You were talking about getting into nice Michelin star restaurants. We're like, who have you ever farted in front of?
00:47:11 Speaker_02
So don't worry about how old you appear because we are pathetic, Joe. When we listen back to this, it's just gonna be two, two weird old men saying to a young, talented man, what's the worst fart you've ever done?
00:47:25 Speaker_04
Probably after some dairy.
00:47:32 Speaker_02
Thank you.
00:47:33 Speaker_04
Yeah.
00:47:34 Speaker_02
I'll be mentioning that in the group chat.
00:47:35 Speaker_04
I was in a theatre once and my stomach was just, I just, in the middle, I never like leave a theatre during a show. I think it's really rude, but I had to. I was like, it's me or the chair.
00:47:44 Speaker_02
It's gonna be really rude to stay.
00:47:45 Speaker_04
It's gonna be really rude to stay to everyone around me.
00:47:47 Speaker_02
Yeah.
00:47:48 Speaker_04
I was like right in the middle and I felt like such a wanker.
00:47:50 Speaker_03
Yeah, and you can't explain, can you, that awkward thing of edging down past people. I'm like, I'm just about to shit myself, please, sorry, can you move? Yeah, yeah. It just doesn't work.
00:47:59 Speaker_03
When you left, did you go butt to their face or butt to the stage? This is not helping us.
00:48:05 Speaker_04
Butt to their face, because I wanted to, like, the performer to know that I was like, I was still wanting to be there with them, but I just... I'm watching for as long as I can. Yeah.
00:48:12 Speaker_04
And then I waited outside to the interval, even though it was like 10 minutes into the show. Cause I was like, I can't walk back in.
00:48:16 Speaker_02
Yeah. What was the show?
00:48:18 Speaker_04
I can't, I'm not going to say that.
00:48:19 Speaker_02
I can't say it. Gruffalo live?
00:48:23 Speaker_04
Well, yeah, it was actually, it was the Gruffalo live. It's my favorite one. Best thing I've seen.
00:48:29 Speaker_02
I'm going to read your menu back to you now, see how you feel about it. Great. You would like sparkling San Pellegrino water with every single citrus fruit at your disposal. Poplums or bread.
00:48:39 Speaker_02
You want oily focaccia with garlic and rosemary, olive oil that oozes out of there, and balsamic vinegar. Starter, you want the pav bhaji from Dishoom. Main course, the lasagna rolls from Don Angie.
00:48:50 Speaker_03
Yeah.
00:48:52 Speaker_02
I'm going to go and find them. I want those lasagna rolls big time. Side dish, the garlicky, citrusy broccolini. Drink an Aperol Spritz, which has what in it, Ed? Aperol. And dessert, you would like the M&S Tiramisu. Yes. Fantastic.
00:49:07 Speaker_02
It does sound very nice, Joe. That's a delicious menu, I think, and nice to have a new thing that has made both of our food bucket lists there. Yeah, it really happens.
00:49:17 Speaker_03
Yeah, we do have to go to New York for it. Yeah. Do you know anyone who can hook me up with first class tickets? Lisa Fox, mate.
00:49:24 Speaker_02
Yes, Lisa Fox. She's yet to get me.
00:49:27 Speaker_04
Airlines don't. They don't do it. No, no. I love that you've tried, though. I have. I have tried, and I will try again.
00:49:36 Speaker_02
Dear Miss Fox, for the millionth time, we are not putting this guy in first class. We do not care. Has Lisa Fox been emailing Benito?
00:49:46 Speaker_03
That's what I want to know.
00:49:47 Speaker_02
Oh yeah, but maybe Benito's been speaking to Lisa Fox. That's quite exciting.
00:49:51 Speaker_04
Maybe Rosie out there is just like, we're gonna go, she's not there. I just hired her to make me seem professional.
00:49:58 Speaker_02
How about this? How about this scenario? Lisa Fox gets you first class on a plane and you sit down and the stewardess comes up to you and says, uh, Mr. Locke, please, we'd like to treat everyone in first class amazingly.
00:50:11 Speaker_02
Would you like to come to the cockpit? And you go in and then the pilot turns around and goes, what's up doc? It's the bus driver and he's gone up in the world in order to get his mission in Starback.
00:50:22 Speaker_04
I think I'd probably get off the plane. I'm not sure, like... I don't know, some of his driving was... Very Isle of Man. Well, there are no speed limits, so... Well, there are some, but you can't... There's no national speed limits.
00:50:36 Speaker_04
You can drive as fast as you want on some roads.
00:50:38 Speaker_02
Really?
00:50:38 Speaker_04
That's pretty cool, man. Yeah. It's cool, but, like, so dangerous. Thank you very much for coming to the Dream Restaurant, Joe.
00:50:43 Speaker_02
No, it's been a pleasure. See you on the group chat, buddy. Yeah. Fartstopper. Fartstopper. The wonderful Joe Locke there, James. Thank you so much, Joe, for coming in, and what a lovely menu.
00:51:00 Speaker_03
What a lovely menu, what a lovely man, and thank you for putting up with all of our shit.
00:51:06 Speaker_02
Yes, we're very, very sorry, and if this may improve our chances of having our apology accepted, we'd like to encourage everyone to watch Agatha All Along, which is out on the 19th of September here in the UK. I'm told it's out on the 18th. In the US?
00:51:20 Speaker_02
In the US.
00:51:21 Speaker_03
We know we've got some US listeners. Yeah, but you know, you're getting it a day earlier than us, what's this? Maybe it's timings, so it'll just, because it's a few hours later, so we just get it after midnight here.
00:51:34 Speaker_02
Also, Heartstopper. Series 3. Series 3. It's on Netflix on the 3rd of October, in whatever country you're in. Thank you Netflix for not screwing us over like Disney have done.
00:51:44 Speaker_03
You're gonna have an absolute Joe Locke fest in September and October.
00:51:48 Speaker_02
Yes, and there's no excuse for not having a Joe Locke fest. And shout out to the Donald Duck bus driver if you're listening, buddy. We're sorry that we razzed you, but we hope you're having a great time.
00:51:58 Speaker_02
I now want to go to the Isle of Man and just get every bus I see. Absolutely, until we see him. Also, thank you to Joe Locke for not saying the secret ingredient, which I've now forgotten. I've literally forgotten it. He didn't say it though.
00:52:11 Speaker_02
He didn't say it, right? Did he? Imagine if we remember it now, if, oh fuck, he said it, and we should have chucked him out.
00:52:16 Speaker_03
It was lasagna rolls.
00:52:17 Speaker_02
It was lasagna rolls, old man, cut diagonally. It was, of course, spring onion. Spring onion. I wasn't listening out for it.
00:52:25 Speaker_03
Jeez. I mean, did he say it? Hang on, let's go through his menu again. The pub argy.
00:52:30 Speaker_02
There might have been spring onion in that. Yeah, you never know. The lasagna rolls. Side dish was? Broccolini. Okay, that's alright. Yeah.
00:52:38 Speaker_03
Obviously, tiramisu ain't got that spring onion in it. It's not gonna be sticking out of an Aperol spritz, although it might be. I don't fucking know anything about it.
00:52:43 Speaker_02
Yeah, I don't know anything about what's in an Aperol spritz, mate. You didn't think Aperol was in it. You got absolutely owned.
00:52:49 Speaker_03
I didn't feel owned, I'll be honest. Yeah, he fucking owned you. Until you said I'd been owned. Yeah. He could have gone a lot harder on me. You wait till you listen back. I ain't listening back, I got owned.
00:53:00 Speaker_02
You wouldn't want to hear that again. Look, maybe we have missed out. Maybe it's in the power bargy. We should have kicked Joe Luck out. Well, listen, everybody. This is very exciting because we'd like to announce a competition.
00:53:14 Speaker_02
There's a new competition that Benito would like you all to know about. All you have to do is you have to tweet the great Benito and you have to tell him all the ingredients of an Aperol spritz and get them all completely right.
00:53:29 Speaker_02
And everyone who gets it right will get a sign chopping board. You have to send them in the order that Joe Locke sent them in. That's very important. And then you will get the sign chopping board sent directly to your house.
00:53:47 Speaker_02
We might make chopping boards. This is something that Benito's found recently today, for merch, that we actually can get chopping boards. And we're saying, can we get them with your signature on them, like, you know, pre-signed?
00:54:01 Speaker_02
Not him doing them by hand.
00:54:03 Speaker_03
But when you've been offered, when you've been offering a signed chopping board, in your mind, have you been offering a chopping board signed by the great Benito?
00:54:11 Speaker_01
Yeah.
00:54:12 Speaker_03
Because I assumed we were offering a chopping board signed by me and you.
00:54:15 Speaker_02
No, I've always imagined it's signed by Ben.
00:54:18 Speaker_03
But do you not remember when we actually had to send someone a signed chopping board? We both signed it. I thought Ben signed it.
00:54:23 Speaker_02
What? Ben signed it. Oh. First time we did it, we said it was signed by Ben and Ben did it. So that's a false memory you've got of signing a chopping board. Mandela syndrome. Mandela. But like, maybe Mandela should have.
00:54:34 Speaker_03
We should get... Okay, if you list all the ingredients in the Aperol Spritz in the order that Joe did them, the Great Benito will send you a chopping board signed by Nelson Mandela. That is our promise.
00:54:47 Speaker_03
But Benito has just told us that only one person has ever received one, even though we must have done this competition 80 or 90 times by now.
00:54:54 Speaker_02
Yeah. So if you are due one and you haven't yet received it, please tweet a screen grab of the DM that you sent to the off menu account or whatever going, I am owed this pony up. Yeah.
00:55:06 Speaker_03
Also I'm adding apricots to the fruit salad.
00:55:08 Speaker_02
Yeah. So that's on there. So if you've got the full fruit salad, Tweet off when you're official, say all the ingredients of the fruit salad, and then you will get a signed chopping board.
00:55:18 Speaker_02
And that should be, it will be either from Great Benito or Nelson Mandela.
00:55:23 Speaker_03
Yes.
00:55:23 Speaker_02
And that's our promise. And we will keep it. We will keep it because we care about you, care about our listeners. And listen, it's an honor hosting this podcast for you every week. And we don't take you for granted. So enjoy your chopping boards.
00:55:36 Speaker_02
Enjoy your chopping boards. Look after each other.
00:55:39 Speaker_03
Bye bye.