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Episode: AEE: Why You Should NOT Say “For Your Information”

Author: Lindsay McMahon and Michelle Kaplan
Duration: 00:18:31

Episode Shownotes

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Full Transcript

00:00:00 Speaker_01
This is an all ears English episode why you should not say for your information Welcome to the All Ears English podcast, downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English?

00:00:16 Speaker_01
We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection with your American hosts, Aubrey Carter, the IELTS whiz, and Lindsay McMahon, the English adventurer. coming to you from Arizona and Colorado, USA.

00:00:38 Speaker_01
To get real-time transcripts right on your phone and create your personalized vocabulary list, try the All Ears English app for iOS and Android. Start your seven-day free trial at allearsenglish.com forward slash app.

00:00:57 Speaker_00
How is the meaning of FYI different from For Your Information? There is a drastic difference that you need to know. Listen in today.

00:01:11 Speaker_01
Hello, Lindsay. How are you? I'm feeling pretty good today. We're getting towards the end of the week here, so feeling great, feeling great. Aubrey, what are we getting into today, though?

00:01:20 Speaker_00
I have a fun question for you to start this out. Okay, I'll do my best to answer. Yes. What do you think is the difference between saying FYI and for your information?

00:01:32 Speaker_01
I think For Your Information feels a little more direct to me. And FYI feels a little more playful. I feel like it's more common. Am I right?

00:01:42 Speaker_00
Yeah. I mean, this is really interesting. I would have said the same probably. I probably would have said before looking into this, I would have said they mean the same thing. And one is the acronym. So maybe the acronym is a little more casual, informal.

00:01:57 Speaker_00
But the more I looked into this, the more I realized how different they are and that you probably actually should never say for your information. I'm going to make an argument for that today.

00:02:08 Speaker_01
Interesting. Okay. Now you've gotten me intrigued here, Aubrey. So let's see what, why we should never say it. So should we cover FYI first for our listeners? Because this is the one they've probably seen, heard.

00:02:20 Speaker_00
Let's do it.

00:02:20 Speaker_00
Let's cover FYI and then for your information and then we're going to give you guys more polite options and really talk about intonation today because these intonation is really key on the message that you're sending with today's phrases.

00:02:34 Speaker_01
Got it. Okay. All right. So what is FYI? It's an acronym, right?

00:02:38 Speaker_00
Yes. So this is said or written, often we put it in emails, to share information without expecting an immediate response or action. You're just giving someone information and they don't really need to respond usually.

00:02:52 Speaker_01
Okay, so more written, yeah. So for example, FYI, I'm running to the grocery store if you need anything.

00:02:58 Speaker_00
Yeah. Or the car is out of gas, FYI. Right.

00:03:01 Speaker_00
So this is just your, and these are spoken phrases, but it's also written for sure, where you're just letting someone know something and you're, you know, it's sort of implied that you don't need them to respond.

00:03:12 Speaker_01
It's kind of like, hey, I hope you listen to this. You should pay attention to this, but I'm not expecting a response. Right. It's basically what that means.

00:03:19 Speaker_00
Yeah. And so, interestingly, for your information, is what FYI stands for, supposedly, right? But our language, English, has really evolved

00:03:29 Speaker_00
to where FYI is now the only one that really means that, and for your information is always a confrontational way to correct someone. Like sometimes jokingly between friends, sometimes angrily, but people almost never say,

00:03:46 Speaker_00
for your information the long way out, just like there's almost always this connotation.

00:03:52 Speaker_01
There's some energy behind it, some anger maybe.

00:03:56 Speaker_00
And I had to think about this. I was trying to come up with examples where I could just say for your information and it would, no, it's like, that's weird. It either sounds weird and I wouldn't say it or it sounds confrontational.

00:04:06 Speaker_01
So you're saying you wouldn't say the car is out of gas for your information.

00:04:10 Speaker_00
All of a sudden, I'd be like, oh, sorry, I should have filled it up, I guess. There feels confrontational.

00:04:18 Speaker_01
So when we say, for your information, we're adding a layer of confrontation.

00:04:23 Speaker_00
So maybe someone accuses you of leaving the milk out and you'd be like, for your information, I was not the one who left the milk out.

00:04:30 Speaker_01
That sounds like a fight, right?

00:04:32 Speaker_00
It sounds like a fight, yeah. But you might say, FYI, that still is going to be kind of confrontational just because of the context here.

00:04:41 Speaker_00
But I love that you pointed out, I wouldn't say, for your information, I'm running to the grocery store if you need anything. If someone said that to me, I'd be like, what's the problem? That would be strange.

00:04:52 Speaker_01
It feels more like you're directly talking to me and you want to say something, right? It is very different.

00:04:58 Speaker_00
It feels confrontational.

00:04:59 Speaker_01
And then I'm confused, like, why?

00:05:01 Speaker_00
Why are you upset?

00:05:02 Speaker_01
Interesting. Or we can also, in this same confrontational way, we could put it at the end of a sentence. I was not the last one to have the key for your information, right? So again, you're standing up for yourself. There might be a fight going on.

00:05:14 Speaker_01
Someone's accusing someone of breaking into a house. I don't know, because you had a key. Whatever's happening.

00:05:21 Speaker_00
Yeah. And keep in mind, even if we said FYI here because of the context, right? If you're like, I wasn't the last one to have the key FYI. There is still a little bit of confrontation here just because of the message of what you're saying.

00:05:32 Speaker_00
But if you really do want to just say FYI, like we use it all the time, you really just want to give someone some information and you don't need a response back.

00:05:41 Speaker_00
Our recommendation after I had to think about this a lot, I thought of a lot of examples. I would never say, for your information. I wouldn't say it out. I would say FYI. And then reserve for your information when you want to be confrontational.

00:05:54 Speaker_01
When you're upset and you're standing up for yourself, for example. Yeah, exactly. This is good to know. You really don't think about it. But then when you dig in, you go deeper, you realize, yeah, they're not the same.

00:06:04 Speaker_01
So we do have other options, though, for our listeners today. Yeah.

00:06:08 Speaker_00
Yes. Right. There are more polite ways because sometimes you do need to get this message across.

00:06:13 Speaker_00
But again, we want to be polite and then we want to be careful with our intonation here because we're going to teach you three phrases that are more polite, but they could sound rude, confrontational, sarcastic, depending on the intonation.

00:06:25 Speaker_01
Yes.

00:06:26 Speaker_00
So the first one is just so you know. Right. So this one, you got to be real careful here with the intonation, as you said.

00:06:33 Speaker_01
Yeah.

00:06:33 Speaker_00
So give it to us first, Lindsay, a sentence where it's like polite. We're trying to politely let someone know that we weren't the one that had the keys last. Okay.

00:06:42 Speaker_01
So just so you know, I didn't have the keys last. I'm not sure who lost them, but it wasn't me.

00:06:47 Speaker_00
All right. Much more polite than for your information. Yes.

00:06:51 Speaker_01
Yes. So that was a more pleasant, polite, non-accusatory tone or non-defensive tone, let's say.

00:06:58 Speaker_00
Yes. But with the exact same words, if you change the intonation, it still could be very accusatory. It could sound rude, right? I'll give you that example. Okay.

00:07:07 Speaker_01
I'm ready.

00:07:07 Speaker_00
Just so you know, I didn't have the keys last. I'm not sure who lost them, but it wasn't me.

00:07:14 Speaker_01
Oh, gosh.

00:07:15 Speaker_00
The tone is so different. It's fascinating.

00:07:18 Speaker_01
Wow. Yeah. Shivers down your spine, right? It definitely, this can be a little scary to hear. If someone is saying that with that kind of tone, you know that things are taking a bad turn in your conversation, right?

00:07:31 Speaker_00
They're very defensive for some reason. They're angry, right? So you want to think about, you can be using the exact same vocabulary and depending on your tone of voice,

00:07:40 Speaker_00
your intonation, you're sending a totally different message, which you especially have to think about in a second language because it's kind of harder to hear the tone. You're thinking about the vocabulary and the grammar. So you have to be aware.

00:07:51 Speaker_00
Listen back, rewind this and listen to Lindsay's and then mine. I'm sure you can hear the difference in tone.

00:07:57 Speaker_01
Yeah. And this next one, we're going to do the same thing. So we could definitely do this and we could start.

00:08:03 Speaker_00
So what is it, Albrecht? What's the phrase? The phrase is, by the way, and Lindsay, if you want to give us the polite. Yeah.

00:08:09 Speaker_01
Sure, I'll be the polite one on the podcast today. There we go. By the way, no, no, let me start again. So by the way, I wasn't the one who left the milk out. Yeah, it's hard.

00:08:20 Speaker_00
It's kind of hard anyway, because just with the context, like, it's a little fresh, like, let's say you've been accused of leaving the milk out. Like you need to get across the message that you weren't the one that did it. Right?

00:08:31 Speaker_00
The worst case, the worst thing you can say, I think, is for your information. Like, the most rude. These are better options, but they're still... It's interesting. It's really tricky.

00:08:41 Speaker_00
It's hard to share that message without being defensive because you are defending yourself.

00:08:45 Speaker_01
Right. It feels fresh. Maybe say something like, Oh, by the way, I wasn't the one who left the milk out. I'm not sure who did. Right.

00:08:51 Speaker_00
When you add that, I don't know who did it, but it wasn't me. That does help. The more you say, the more you add does help. But again, this can be said with very rude, defensive intonation. I'll give us that.

00:09:02 Speaker_01
Okay.

00:09:03 Speaker_00
By the way, I wasn't the one who left the milk out. It's like every word changes, right? Because I'm adding this snarky tone.

00:09:13 Speaker_01
So when you hear that from someone, you know, again, there's a fight brewing. Maybe there's already drama in your home, for example, right? Yeah. Okay. Third one, Aubrey, is for what it's worth.

00:09:25 Speaker_00
Yes.

00:09:26 Speaker_01
This is a good one too. Yeah.

00:09:28 Speaker_00
So give us the polite way. If you're trying to let someone know, you know, maybe you've been accused of being late a lot. What could you say?

00:09:36 Speaker_01
Okay. Well, for what it's worth, I always try to be on time.

00:09:40 Speaker_00
Nice, right? Very polite. It's a nice way to say, you know, you're kind of this for what it's worth does soften it more. But again, I'll give the rude version depending on your tone. You could say, for what it's worth, I try to always be on time.

00:09:56 Speaker_00
And this would actually this sounds like I'm accusing the other person of always being late.

00:10:00 Speaker_01
Oh, yes. Okay. And there's so there's extra meaning in that.

00:10:03 Speaker_00
I try to always be on time. I don't know about you.

00:10:07 Speaker_01
It is super interesting and super important for our listeners to hear both versions of all three of these expressions, right?

00:10:13 Speaker_00
Right. Yeah, that's interesting. You don't think about the... there could be hidden meaning or double meaning. You could be accidentally accusing someone of something when it's not in the words you're saying, it's implied by your tone. Wow.

00:10:25 Speaker_01
Okay, Aubrey, let's move on. Let's bring this all into a role play. And just so I'm clear, it sounds like we're in a fight. So we need to be fresh, fresh, fresh, fresh here.

00:10:35 Speaker_00
Yeah. So we, the good thing is we are friends who fought recently, but we have now met up to talk about it. So we're still going to use these phrases, but we're trying to be polite. We're not in a fight. Okay.

00:10:46 Speaker_01
We were in a fight before. Okay. Then nevermind my comment. Okay. Yes. All right. Here we go. All right.

00:10:51 Speaker_00
I'll start us out. For what it's worth. I'm really sorry about what happened.

00:10:55 Speaker_01
Oh, thanks. By the way, I was mostly just surprised and I probably shouldn't have reacted the way I did.

00:11:01 Speaker_00
You had every right to be upset. I'm sorry about saying, for your information, I'm not the one who wrecked the car. That was uncalled for.

00:11:09 Speaker_01
I appreciate that. Just so you know, I found out later why you were upset and then I understood.

00:11:13 Speaker_00
I still shouldn't have taken it out on everyone, though. Thanks for understanding.

00:11:18 Speaker_01
The tone here clearly is a make-up conversation, right?

00:11:22 Speaker_00
Yep.

00:11:22 Speaker_01
Yeah. We're making up. We are kind of coming back together and we're saying, oh, we're apologizing.

00:11:28 Speaker_00
Yeah. And all of these phrases are perfect for this, where we're trying to say, FYI, but in a more polite way. Like, I want you to know that, but it's couched with apology and explanation of why something happened.

00:11:44 Speaker_01
Yes. So should we go back through them one more time?

00:11:47 Speaker_00
Let's do it.

00:11:48 Speaker_01
So you said, for what it's worth, I'm really sorry. And again, you could feel our tone of voice is different. It's kind of like a little bit more pleasant, more calm, more even keeled a little bit.

00:11:58 Speaker_00
Yes. Right. And this, because we're talking about a fight we had and we're trying to smooth things over, it would make no sense to do the rude version. You would want to really be careful to keep that out of, you know, to be like, for what it's worth,

00:12:10 Speaker_00
I'm really so like if you sound sarcastic, it wouldn't make sense because you're genuinely trying to smooth things over.

00:12:16 Speaker_01
Yes. And then I said, thanks. By the way, I was mostly just surprised. And so here you're just saying, by the way, you're just informing. I'm informing you.

00:12:25 Speaker_00
Exactly. Yep. And then I had to quote myself in the past in order to use for your information. Right. So it's like, I'm sorry when I said, and then I'm, I'm kind of mimicking my own tone as I apologize. Right.

00:12:38 Speaker_00
I'm sorry about saying for your information, I'm not the one who wrecked the car. Yeah. Cause I'm like, if I quote myself here that I can include it in the role. That makes sense.

00:12:47 Speaker_01
Because we remember guys, if you go back to earlier in the episode, we said that just saying for your information becomes quite serious and quite confrontative.

00:12:55 Speaker_00
Yes, exactly.

00:12:56 Speaker_01
So we're having a more coming back together apology conversation. Yeah.

00:13:00 Speaker_00
Right. And then you said, just so you know, I found out later why you're upset. And then I understood.

00:13:06 Speaker_00
So all of these, you could take this whole role play and remove all of these because what they're trying to do is add this extra meaning of like, I'm just letting you know this just FYI, same meaning, right? Just just so that you know.

00:13:19 Speaker_00
And they're not necessary. You could just say, I appreciate that. I found out later why you were upset. But we add this to create really even more politeness to let them know like, it's important to me that you know this.

00:13:32 Speaker_01
Yeah, it makes it more personal, the conversation, right? Yes. Okay. And we want to send our listeners back to an episode that we just did. Was that episode 2316? I'm looking back to see what was the number. I think it was 2315. 2315. So just earlier this week, who asked you rude phrases to avoid in English?

00:13:54 Speaker_00
Okay. This is where we also talked about some phrases that you could accidentally sound really rude. Politeness is so important in English, especially you don't want to accidentally send a message you don't intend.

00:14:05 Speaker_01
Oh my gosh, it is huge. And this is great. We have been going into a lot of stuff about politeness, rudeness, and how to make sure that we're not unintentionally being rude. Exactly.

00:14:17 Speaker_00
Yeah. And this is so interesting. I had never thought about before how FYI, and then when you actually say that out for your information, really has such a different meaning, conveys such a different feeling. So definitely be aware.

00:14:33 Speaker_01
Yeah, this is, I mean, if connection is our highest value, which it is on this show, we should be really looking into this and making this a priority, especially as our listeners move up into the C1 level, right? This becomes the priority.

00:14:46 Speaker_01
It's not so much about grammar. We've pretty much got the grammar. We're adding new vocabulary, but it's about this. It's about what your words convey. The meaning behind your words, right?

00:14:55 Speaker_00
We don't want you to accidentally ruin connections by having these hidden meanings that you're not aware of, right? There are these subtle nuances, these double meanings sometimes, and intonation really changes meaning. Yes.

00:15:09 Speaker_01
Before we finish up today, I just want to remind our listeners, guys, you can always listen to the podcast in our iOS or Android app. But when you listen over there, you get special features.

00:15:19 Speaker_01
For example, for premium users, we now get a special weekly role play that no one else gets anywhere else but in the app. And what is that role play all about?

00:15:29 Speaker_00
I know it's amazing. All the keywords from all of the episodes for the week, we put them into one role play. So you can see how these unrelated vocabulary words could all come up in one conversation. It's really interesting.

00:15:40 Speaker_00
And that's just for users of the app.

00:15:43 Speaker_01
Yeah, exactly. So that along with transcripts right on your phone as you listen to the episode. So guys, go over to all ears, english.com slash app and download the app and give it a try. There's a seven day free trial, so you can try that out.

00:15:56 Speaker_00
That's awesome. Check it out. All right, Aubrey. Talk soon. Bye. See you next time.

00:16:01 Speaker_01
Bye. Bye. Thanks for listening to All Ears English. Would you like to know your English level? Take our two minute quiz. Go to allearsenglish.com forward slash fluency score.

00:16:17 Speaker_01
And if you believe in connection, not perfection, then hit subscribe now to make sure you don't miss anything. See you next time.